words in movies
Chandler: Really? What do you do? You just sit in there stewing in your own filth.
Joey: It was different for you guys! I mean, I mean, you were both in the same place, right?
Chandler: In London?
Chandler: Yes. When Monica and I were in London, we were both in London.
Rachel: Wow, oh my God, our child will be beaten to death in the schoolyard.
[Cut to Chandler laying in the bathtub. "Only Time," is playing in the background.]
Dr. Long: Okay! All your tests look fine. Now, are you two interested in knowing the sex of the baby?
Rachel: But you have it right there in that file? You could tell us whether its a boy or a girl? Dayton or Sandrine? Phoebe or Phoebo?
Chandler: Im in the bathroom, can you come in here? I think theres something wrong.
Chandler: Im in the bathtub.
Chandler: I dont know! Joey hasnt had this much trouble getting out words since we saw him in Macbeth!
Monica: Okay. So you, me and London. Looking at people differently. Maybe he wants to do what you and I did in London with someone.
Monica: Wait a minute! He stopped talking the minute Phoebe came in!
Chandler: My God! He wants to do it with Phoebe in London!
Monica: You just stay here! (Dumps a jar of bath salts in the bathtub)
(Monica runs out to Phoebe, who is in the kitchen)
Monica: Is it something youd be interested in?
[Scene: Central perk, Ross is sitting on the chair as Rachel walks in.]
Ross: I dont think so! Youre just giving me Ruth so youll get to name it when its a boy, and thats when youll swoop in and name him Heath or Blaine or Sequoia.
(As soon as Monica leaves the room, Chandler takes off his jacket and runs to the bathroom. Monica enters the bathroom to find Chandler in the bathtub.)
Monica: Fine, you can have the bath, but I am taking your boat. Now youre just a girl in a tub!
Phoebe: Were in the bathroom!
Joey: (entering the bathroom) What are you guys doing in here?
Rachel: (entering) Hey! Ross and I were looking for you! What are we all doing in here? (Looks at Chandler) Oh, my! (Covers the spot where Joey wants bubbles to be replaced.)
Chandler: (sarcastically) Yes were all in here and we would love for you to join us!
COMMERCIAL VOICEOVER: Can't get the monkey off your back? Then put it in your mouth...
Joey: (sarcastic) Oh no this is devastating! My faith is shaken. Im so glad I have the new chair to get my through this difficult time in my life.
Chandler: Sure. (Pause) And listen, thanks for doing that for us, by the way. (Retreats in defeat.)
[Scene: Back in the kitchen at the funeral. Phoebe is there, Monica enters.]
Robert: Oh, no thanks. I always carry one in my sock.
Joey: So you're gonna have to do it in the mess!
Ross: Ohh, God, nobody likes him, and hes so cheap, hed never fly to London in a million years. Yeah, invite him? Hey, did I do these neat enough? (Hands her some envelopes.)
Mrs. Burkart: (in grief) Jack used to handle the finances! (Breaks into tears)
Joey: (on phone) Yeah, my neighbor... (Listens) Yeah, the brunette... (to Monica) She says you looked very pretty the other day in the green dress.
Rachel: You guys, come on, it doesn't matter why we're late. We're all here now, please let us in so we can have some of your delicious turkey. (A slice of turkey on a piece of aluminum foil is slid under door)
[Scene: In the living room at the funeral]
Chandler: So um, after you put the suggestion in the box, how long did it take for the roller skating thing to happen.
Chandler: (in a deep voice) If I broke up with you, Id miss you.
[Sequence 4: Ross hikes the ball to Chandler, and the camera pans down to show Rachel standing deep in the end zone, playing with her gum. Something hits her on the head and she looks up to see where it came from.]
Monica: Well, what do you think of Mike and Chandler being in a car accident?
Chandler: Why cant we talk in here? With, with, witnesses.
Kathy: I'll be in in a minute.
Ross: Well maybe she wouldnt have to be selfish in bed if someone else knew where everything was!
RACH: When you were in China.
Chandler: Come in!
Phoebe: (reading from the note) Good-bye Phoebe and Ursula. Ill miss you. P.S. Your Mom lives in Montauk. You just wrote this!
Phoebe: I just felt so bad, missing this. So I just slipped him a little something, you know. As long as I'm back in five or six hours, it will be alright.
Joey: Well. I guess you think youre pretty special huh? Sittin up here in your fancy small hall building. Makin stars jump through hoops for ya, huh? Well yknow what? (Throws the script away) This is one star whos hoop This is a star that the hoopthis hoopI was Dr. Drake Remoray!
Rachel: Ross, I watched you get hypnotised in Atlantic City.
Ross: No, but ah, theres coconut in the Hanukkah Menoreoes. I tell you what, Ill put you down for eight boxes, one for each night.
(They lean in to kiss and are interrupted by the phone.)
Mr. Geller: Well, I dont know whats in the boxes down here, but I do know there are six or seven Easy Bake Ovens in the attic.
Monica: You just put an empty carton back in the fridge!
Mrs. Geller: No-no-no, that was all true. This was just in case you pulled a Monica.
Rachel: When she sees that youre gone, shes gonna know that I let you out, and that I was in here, and Im gonna get fired!
Phoebe: ( in a soothing voice) Relax every muscle in your body. Listen to the plinky-plunky music. Okay, now close you eyes, and think of a happy place. Okay, tell me your happy place.
Joey: It's easy, you just walk in on them having sex.
Joey: If you wanna get back in the car, we need the wire, your call.
Ross: Correct. In what part of her body did Monica get a pencil stuck at age 14?
[Phoebe puts the car in gear and starts to back out.]
Rachel: Yeah, I mean, you should play in public!
Chandler: Look, Im sorry! But theres nothing I can do, I think Im in love with her!
Phoebe: Oh my God!! (She runs after him, but sets of the security system, which locks the stores door and brings down a set of bars behind her, caging her in.) No! What?! Help me! Let me out! Now! (Points the musket at them.)
Chandler: Oh! (Whispers something in Joeys ear and then in Rosss ear.)
Rachel: (standing in her doorway) People are trying to sleep in here!
Woman: (looking through her peephole, we see Ross standing in the hallway.) Yesss?
Joey: No! Im putting that in my room.
Rachel: Okay! (Grabs a knife and cuts it in half.) All right, pick a half.
Joey: (Something in Italian.) (Storms out.)
Kate: No, thats not it. So, youre a soap actor? Well this must be pretty exciting for you to be in a real play, hmm?
Joey: Dont you think I asked him that before he got in?!
Rachel: Is he okay in there?
Chandler: (He is now in the box, in their living room.) Sounds like a really bad idea to me.
Melissa: Of course I remember our kiss. I think about it all the time. I can still hear the coconuts knockin together I (Phoebe is shocked.) I just didnt want to tell you cause I didnt think that youd return my love, and now that you have (Leans in to kiss Rachel.)
(They all cheer and Rachel, Ross and Phoebe join in for a group hug. Joey also joins, but he stands back a bit, because he is all sticky of the food on him)
Monica: Why? (in a motherlike tone) Do you have a report due?
All: Whoa. (they all lean in to get a closer look, Ross isn't pleased)
Phoebe Sr: Well, because youd be giving up a baby, and I-I really dontI dont know if theres anything I can say that could make you understand the pain of giving up a baby. So, umm, (Picks up a puppy in the box next to the couch.)
Benjamin: Alright, it's true. I behaved horribly. But it's only because I still love you. And I would do anything to have you back in my life.
Chandler: Thats not true! I wanted to wear my bathrobe and eat peanut clusters all day. I wanted to start drinking in the morning. Dont say that I dont have goals!
Joey: In the box.
Monica: She's this girl who used to live in the building before you did. Then she moved to England and she picked up this fake British accent. On the machine this is her message. (she apes Amanda using an awful British accent) "Monica, darling! It's Amanda calling!"
Joey: Well, it looks like it wasnt heeled after all! Yeah! So, I guess this chair is mine now! (Sits down in it and groans.)
Ross: (in his head) All right, keep going. We are phasing the accent out, phasing it out. So without out re-testing the results in the laboratory (pronounced the British way) the team would never have identified (British) the initial errors in their carbon dating analysis (British). Were there any questions at this point? (One student raises his hand.) Yes. (Points to him.)
(Kathy leaves and Chandler groans in agony. Kathy knocks on the door and Chandler opens it.)
Monica: All right, were you guys smoking something in the back of our van?
Joanna: Really? Well, in that case
Ross: Well, so, you-youll get a job here! I mean, Im always hearing about uh, them foreigners coming in here and stealing American jobs; that could be you!
(Ross wears the jackets and look at himself in the mirror)
[Scene: The Gellers kitchen, Phoebe is bringing in some dirty dishes.]
Phoebe: Monica slow down! Ok? I'm just excited to be living with him. You know I mean, I don't know, Can I see someday being married to Mike? Sure! Yeah. Y'know..I can picture myself walking down the aisle in a wedding dress that highlights my breasts in an obvious yet classy way. But do I want that house in Connecticut...you know..near the good schools where Mike and I can send Sophie and Mike Junior.. Oh my god I do.
Monica: Chandler In all my life I never thought I would be so lucky. (Starting to cry.) As to fall in love with my best my best Theres a reason why girls dont do this!
Chandler: Id carry you around in my pocket.
Joanna: Sophie, get in here! (Sophie enters) You see! Now youre making Sophie uncomfortable!
Joey/Drake: How can I? Knowing I'll never hold you in my arms again, or touch your skin, or feel your lips, knowing I'll never make love to you? How can I accept that... I can never kiss you again when it's all I can do not to kiss you right now.
(They both shiver in horror.)
Monica: So, did you play in college? (She points to his NYU Soccer (football for the rest of the world) sweatshirt he's wearing.)
RACHEL: Ya know, I just, so weird. I mean I was in there just listening to them bitch about each other and all I kept thinking about was the fourth of July.
Ross: So, uh, this guy, she used to go out with, is, uh is he still in love with her?
Joey: Arg... Alright, I'll take care of it. <throws hands out in the air>
Rachel: Oh, hi Mrs. Lynch! Is Joanna in already?
Joey: (to Kate) That guys like a cartoon. What do you see in him anyway?
Chandler: (answering it) Hello. (listens) (to Ross) Its Gandolf!!! (on phone) So, are you in town? (listens) (disappointed) Oh, well, well maybe next time then. (Hangs up)
Monica: (hums for a while, then gives up, and in her head) If it bothers you that much, just go out and get the shoes. No. Don't do this. This is stupid! I don't have to prove anything, I'm gonna go get them...But then everyone will know. Unless I get them, and then wake up really early and put them back! ...I need help! (She buries her head in her pillow.)
RACHEL: I know. And Mom, I realize you and Daddy were upset when I didn't marry Barry and get the big house in the suburbs with all the security and everything, but this is just so much better for me, you know?
Monica: Excuse me, Mrs. Burkart? Well, we're all cleaned up in the kitchen.
ERICA: You told me I was the only one. [throws a glass of water in his face]
Julie: Well, Ross and I were in grad school together.
Chandler: My Catholic friend is right. She's distraught. You're there for her. You pick up the pieces, and then you usher in the age of Ross! (Ross and Chandler look off into the distance. Joey, wondering what they are looking at, looks in the same direction)
Chandler: Look, I-Im just gonna be right across the hall and I promise you, the minute Monica and I break up Im moving right back in with you!
Ross: Look, what do you want me to do? Do you want me to call everyone in the entire school and tell them it wasnt true?!
Rachel: Oh, in my head he's done some pretty "not-gay-stuff"!
(Chandler grunts and turns around, sees that hes in sight of the room, and mouths damn!)
Ross: You know that girl I told you about who lives up in Poughkeepsie?
(And with that, an era ends as Chandler moves in with Monica as Rachel moves in with Phoebe. It tis a sad and happy time for Friends.)
Mrs. Green: Oh, Im so happy Im gonna do this for my little girl. Aw, look at you. You have tears in your eyes.
(In the meantime, Rachel has returned with the perfume and sprays a mist out in front of Phoebe who walks through the mist and does a little spin.)
Joey: Heyooh Pheebs, are they in there?
Monica: Who cares? He works in a museum!
Monica: And it has to go perfectly, because if she doesn't like something about us she can keep us off every adoption list in the state.
Joey: No, I had sex in high school.
Rachel: (shakes her head) Alright, alright look, just uh... just try to remember how you felt when you were in love, and think about that when you're playing the scene.
Chandler: You had a dream about a girl that I am seeing?! Oh, that is so cool! (To Monica) I can't tell you how many times I've dreamt about a girl that he was seeing. (Seeing Monica's stare.) (To Joey) Anyway we're talking about your dream. (To Monica) I love you. (To Joey) Your dream? (Leans in to listen closely.)
Chandler: Hes not gonna make it, hes stuck in Chicago.
Joey: Let's just say there's a well-dressed pack of dogs in Ohio. Hey Monica listen is-is Phoebe there? I gotta ask her something about the car.