words in movies
[Scene: The Hospital, Ross and Rachel, whos in a wheelchair, are arriving in the waiting room for the maternity ward.]
Ross: All right! (Checking his watch) Yes!! From home to the hospital in under seven minutes! We did it!!
(Phoebe and Monica walk in from getting some coffee.)
Nurse: Right! We have a semi-private labor room waiting for you. So in just a minute
Ross: Well then wed be in a lot of trouble, you dont know where any countries are. (Rachel glares at him.) Okay. (He goes over to the desk followed by Rachel.) Uh, say would you umm Would you mind checking again to see if any umm, private rooms may have (Handing her some money) opened up?
Rachel: (standing up) Okay. Yknow what? Id have to say I really dont care for your tone. And this is not the only hospital in this city and we have no problem toWhoa! (She starts a contraction) Oh gosh! Whoa!
[Scene: The Semi-Private Labor Room, Rachel is in bed, Ross is fooling around, and Dr. Long is checking on Rachel.]
Dr. Long: Ill be back in an hour to check you again.
Ross: Yeah, guess so. Whew! Check these out! (Hes looking at the stirrups on the other bed in the room and Rachel groans. Ross then hops into the bed and puts his legs into the stirrups.) Never done this before.
Marc: No nonsense! Were all in this together.
Mrs. Geller: Honestly! Ross, this isnt just some girl you picked up in a bar and humped. A child should have a family.
Ross: Gimmie! (Takes the ring and puts it in his coat pocket as Rachel enters the hallway.)
Rachel: Oh, thank you so much for coming. Ross, get in here!
Joey: I mean seriously, shes like the perfect woman. I mean I know she turned me down, but if she hadnt and wanted to be with me, I would take her in my arms and (Realizes everyone is staring.) I havent bummed you guys out like this in a while have I?
Evil Bitch: Shes in labor! You like that you sick son of a bitch!
(Sick Bastard sits down in a chair that enables him to look around the screen and stare at Rachel.)
Chandler: Were trying to get pregnant. (They start kissing, but Chandler stops it.) Yknow Im not really comfortable doing this in front of the babies. So, when do you want to start trying?
Chandler: Wait a minute, its perfect. We got a lot of time to kill and were in a building thats full of beds!
(They run off in search of a bed.)
[Cut to the elevator lobby, Phoebe walks up and sees a man in a wheelchair with his broken leg extended.]
Man: Im in the middle (The elevator door closes, cutting him off.)
Ross: The nurse said theyre bringing in another woman.
Phoebe: (to the nurse) Excuse me? Could you help me with something? The patient Im looking for has a broken leg and is in a wheelchair. And umm, hes like early to mid-thirties, very attractive.
Phoebe: Oh yay! Great! Okay, what room number is he in?
Joey: Hands! It is absolutely essential that you tell me what room the man my assistant described is staying in. Hes a patient of mine, Ive been treating him for years!
Nurse: Hes in room 816.
Monica: Okay. Lets hurryOh wait! Do we have a condom? (He looks at her.) Oh right! (Laughs and they resume making out when a nurse catches them in the act.)
Phoebe: Ooh, this is it! (Looks in the window.) Oh, thats him! Thats him!
Phoebe: Wait a second, or maybe you can go in first.
Joey: (looks in the window) Hes not really my type.
[Scene: The Semi-Private Labor Room, theyre brining in yet another woman.]
Rachel: Okay! Okay wait! You listen to me! You listen to me! Since I have been waiting four women, thats four, one higher than the number of centimeters that I am dilated, have come and gone with their babies! Im next! Its my turn! Its only fair! And if you bring in one woman and she has her baby before me Im going to sue you! Not this hospital, Im going to sue you! And my husband (Points at Ross) hes a lawyer!
Rachel: Okay, well then bring her in.
(Another nurse wheels the next pregnant woman in.)
Sid: I still cant believe it! Im the luckiest guy in the world!
Ross: Uh well umm were just not in that place, yknow? But were very excited about this.
Monica: We could, or we can have sex in it.
[Scene: The Semi-Private Labor Room, Chandler and Monica are entering to see if they in fact did hear Janice.]
Ross: Not just Janice, Janice in labor, contracting and everything.
Janice: (laughs) Look how nervous he gets! We havent slept together in years! (Laughs again.)
[Scene: The Semi-Private Labor Room, Janice is being moved to the delivery room and is screaming in pain.]
Rachel: Doctor you gotta do something! I think you gotta give me drugs or you gotta light a fire up in there and just smoke it out.
Cliff: Is this the same spoon that was in my cast? (Smells it.)
Cliff: Oh my God! Thats the doctor who was in my room before!
Cliff: Im telling you! The guy from that show was here in my room, asking me all these weird questions!
Phoebe: Cliff, do you really believe that a character from a TV show was here in your room?
Phoebe: Okay. Okay. IOkay umm this I-I sent my friend Joey in here to find out stuff about you. Umm yknow, if it helps you came off great. A lot better than Im coming off right now.
Dr. Long: Okay, the next contraction should be in about twenty seconds.
Dr. Long: Shes gonna be fine. Okay, shes in a more difficult position so youre gonna have to push even harder now. Go! Push!
Ross: You have no idea how much this hurts. (All of the women in the room turn and glare at him.) Keep going! Keep going!
Phoebe: Can we come in?
Ross: Oh, come in.
Rachel: Ohhh! (Looks at Aaron and recoils in horror.) Wow! He kinda takes your breath away doesnt he?
Rachel: Oh, Im fine. (Gasps in pain as she sits down.)
Rachel: Uh-huh. (Ross takes off his coat and sets in on a chair.) Yknow what I was, I was thinking about?
Phoebe: Is she in there?
Phoebe: Im sorry, for the last time, why arent you two together again? (Silence from Ross.) No, I know. I know, because youre not in that place. Which would be fine, except you totally are.
Ross: Look, weve been together. Okay? And then apart, and then together, and then apart, and now we have a baby. (Pause) Its just if-if we got together again and it didnt work out I could never do that to Emma. I mean she-she thinking everything(Starts to cry.) Oh thats now me. What do they put something in the water in this place? Since Rachel and I were doing really, were doing really well right now.
[Scene: The Delivery Room, Rachel is in bed as Joey enters.]
{Transcribers Note: As with all the cliffhangers, there was no credits scene. There will be a ninth and final season of Friends starting sometime in September. See you then, have a good summer everyone.}
Joey: Itll be great for next weekend. I mean, (in an Irish accent) itll be grrreat.
[later in the bathroom Monica is looking in the drawer, Rachel runs up]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Phoebe is looking at her beeper still in the pot. She takes it out, shakes it, and puts it back in.]
(Phoebe runs in and joins her.)
[Monica jumps in the shower. Right after Mrs. Geller enters the bathroom, Mr. Geller peeks his head in.]
(As shes saying that Joey is to pull out a chair and sit down, only Matthew comes running in from off camera and dives for the same chair.)
[Scene: The rest stop, Phoebes pulling in.]
(Both Chandler and Monica walk away in disgust.)
Monica: You say Thank you very much, and then you buy me something pretty. Come on, were gonna put are hands in this bowl, and were gonna start squishing the tomatoes.
Rachel: (in triumph) I got a touchdown! We did it!!
Chandler: You gave them one day's notice, not everyone in our class checks the web site everyday and Monica... it's probably the way you stand!
Joey: Well, safer. Y'know, I mean I never start reading The Shining, without making sure weve got plenty of room in the freezer, y'know.
Gunther: Someone in here.
Rachel: Do you want to put the book in the freezer?
Monica: Yes! Yes! And I think that the first gift that Rachel opens should be from the grandmother of the baby, because youre the most important person in this room. And in the world!
Monica: Wow! Its like Rachel in High School.
Ross: (voiceover) So when she came in, I got distracted and totally forgot about the camera. [Cut back to the present day.] It kept rolling and recorded everything.
Phoebe: In your atlas!
Rachel: But ah, youre safe from it if its in the freezer?
[Scene: The Xerox place, Chandler and Joey are waiting in line.]
Sergei: (something in Russian or Polish)
RACHEL: No, was he any good in it?
Cheryl: (looking in the bag) Oh, thank god, it's not Mitzi. It's just a rat.
(The camera zooms in on Sarah and she has a big smile on her face.)
Mischa: (leaning in) Your eyes are very pretty.
Ross: (loudly so that everyone can hear) Hey lady! I don't care how much you want it! Okay?! I am not gonna to have sex with you in the bathroom! (Rachel sinks lower on her chair trying to hide.)
Phoebe: (rushing in) Okay. If youre alive you answer your phone!
Chandler: Oh God, it freaked me out. Okay, I know it shouldnt have, but it did. I mean I like her, I dont want to stop seeing her, but every so often its like Hey, y'know what, wheres your leg? I mean Im the smallest person in the world arent I? Im the smallest person in the world.
TRAINER: Hey don't take it personal, he's under a lot of pressure, ya know, starring in a movie and all.
Chandler: She was.... But y'know what, just in case, maybe we should come up with a set of ground rules.
Phoebe: Okay, this is what Im talking about, this. I-I need to live in a land where people can spill.
Phoebe: No, y'know what dont close it (Rachel slams the door shut locking themselves out.) cause the... keys...are in there.
Chandler: (to Rachel) You know what I just realized? We have no idea what we're doing in the wedding tomorrow.
Rachel: Well, I dont know. I called all the people in Monicas phone book and these are the only ones who could show up on 24 hours notice.
Joey: Hey, Pheebs! Check-check this out. (Holds up his hand in one of Phoebe's chords.)
Rachel: No. (Ross is standing in the doorway.) A break from us.
Laura: Oh, it's nothing. I went on a date with a guy who lived in this building and it didn't end very well.
Ross: No, no, no just do it. Go in there and pick something out so we can go.
Phoebe: Well, sure in a perfect world. But, no, I promised I wouldnt tell, and I swore to like all my gods.
Chandler: (Getting up and raising his fist in victory) Y-Y-YEEESSS! Make "groom" for Chandler.
Ross: Marcel is an illegal exotic animal. I'm not allowed to have him in the city. If they find him, they'll take him away from me.
Chandler: I'm sorry. Hey, at least you guys get to go home and be with your families tonight. I have to go back to an empty hotel room and lay down on a very questionable bedspread. And then tomorrow morning, you get to have Christmas morning in your own houses, wich, by the way, none of you have invited me to.
Monica: I have no moves. (He moves in to kiss her and she laughs and backs away.) Okay, whatcha doin there?! (Giggles.) Oh yknow what? Im sorry, this is just too weird.
Joey: Nothing, hes just really believes in that.
Phoebe: I don't know, I mean, he's a good person, and he can be really sweet, and in some ways I think he is so right for me, it's just... I hate that guy!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel is lying in front of the bay window, and the phone rings.]
Phoebe: Umm, no, it's a purse. And there's a thermos in it.
(Monica walks in, starts to go out on the balcony.)
(Chandler agrees in an absolutely bored way.)
Rachel: Yeah, you know, was I looking forward to going to Paris? Sure. You know, was I excited about working in the fashion capital of the world? Ooh, absolutely... Oh...! Yeah, but you know, this is... it's fine. I'm fine going back to a job where I've pretty much gotten everything out of that I possibly can... (she sits down, and Ross who is stunned to hear all this follows her example)
Phoebe: They have the best stuff in there.
Rachel: I'm sorry. All right, I'll just stay in here this time. (Puts her head back.) Okay.
Joey: Hey, dont start judging me! (To Rachel) Huh? Youre the one whos in love with her assistant! (To Phoebe) Huh? And you, youre the one having the affair with the guy who keeps the pigeons on the roof!
Rachel: A mistake?! What were you trying to put it in? Her purse?!
Phoebe: Yep. Put more gas in.
Jason: ...and I know I'll never miss doing it, but I gotta tell you, it's pretty cool knowing that you're making a difference in a kid's life.
Joey: (screaming) Why God?!! Why?!! We had a deal!! Let the others grow old! Not me!! (He buries his head in Phoebes lap for comfort.)
Chandler: Now, Monica, you know that's not how you look for an engagement ring in a lasagne...
David: Yeah, Im just, Im just in town for a conference. Umm, God you look phenomenal!
[Scene: Ross's bedroom, Ross is working and Rachel is reading a book in bed]
MNCA: Chandler, I'm unemployed and in dire need of a project. Ya wanna work out? I can remake you.
Chandler: My boss said I might be getting a new lamp in my cubicle. (Monica looks at him and can't really place what he just said)
Chandler: I think this is probably why Damone smokes in his cell alone.
Joey: Shhh! This is a museum, no talking. Right down here, (Motions to a fossilised dinosaur foot.) we have a large foot. (Sees Ross working in one of the display cases.) Uhh, and over here we have Ross Geller. (Knocks on the glass) Everyone wave Hi to Ross. Ross is one of our most important scientists, look at him, hard at work. (Ross does the old "Putting a cigarette in your ear and pulling it out of your mouth trick.") Okay, moving right along. Come on.
Chandler: (to Monica) Actually hes the smallest person in the world.
Joey: Yeah, and not put us in the middle.
Dick Clark: (on TV) Hi, this is Dick Clark, live in Times Square. We're in a virtual snowstorm of confetti here in Times Square...
Gunther: (to Chandler) Oh, no-no, no-no-no, theres none of that in here.
Monica: Really. Well, at least 'big girls' don't pee in their pants in seventh grade!
Monica: I cant leave it! You gouged a hole in my dingy floor.
(Ross lets them both sit in his chair.)
Joey: (lying on a beach towel, recapping what happened in the last episode) Okay, so we went to the beach, because Phoebe found out about this lady who knew her mom and dad, and I dont really know what happened with that.
Alice: Uhh, we were just in the neighbourhood, so
Ross: OK. (closes eyes) I'm in my apartment...
Billy: Like when you go bowling and you know youre in somebody elses shoes?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Monica and Dr. Burke are sitting on the couch. He's showing her the pictures in his wallet.]
[Scene: Monica, Fun Bobby, and Phoebe sitting in Central Perk Rachel is serving them. She brings a mug to Monica.]
Chandler: Me too. I wanna find a baby that needs a home and I wanna raise it with you. And I wanna mess it up in our own specific way.
Phoebe: Okay. Whoa, sorry. Why were you just like all in the dark?
All: ...Hey! You're in a play! I didn't know you could dance! You had a beard!
Monica: (in the hallway) So, where do you want to go?
Alice: None the less. Umm, youre too young to, to really know what you want. (They embrace in a passionate kiss.)
(He bends over to pick them up, right in front of Rachel, who then gets a free peep show.)
Joey: (very satisfied and smiling) That's what I wanted to hear! Because she's family, ok, and now you're gonna be family, and there is nothing more important in the whole world, than family.
Joey: Wow! Theres a lot I didnt know about vomit. (The duck comes to the door of the bathroom, quacking.) (To the duck) In a minute. (The duck goes back into the bathroom.)
Ross: Yes, it was the trophy you got if you won the game. But our Dad said, nobody won that game, and he was sick of our fighting, so he took the trophy and.... (pauses to collect himself, as he is on the verge of tears saying this) threw it in the lake.
Phoebe: Oh, Joey! Oh, okay, see I didn't recognize you wearing, in those....pants.
Chandler: But you did like us. And you should. My wife's an incredible woman. She's loving and devoted and caring. And don't tell her I said this but the woman's always right... I love my wife more than anything in this world. And I... It kills me that I can't give her a baby... I really want a kid. And when that day finally comes, I'll learn how to be a good dad. But my wife... she's already there. She's a mother... without a baby... Please?
Ross: (He opens the door while faking a laugh.) Hey! Oh, we-we can't keep eating like this. (Monica turns her head in shame.)
Phoebe: Huh, well, the girls in the satin nighties on the commercial dont seem to think its that bad.
[Scene: A restaurant in Rome, Monica is paying for the pizza.]
Ross: Well, Im just saying, I mean why else would he just, y'know, swoop in out of nowhere for no reason.
Janice: Yeah, well, it scares me! I mean I not even divorced yet, Chandler. You know, you just invited me over here for pasta, and all of the sudden you're talking about moving in together. And, and I wasn't even that hungry. You know what, it's getting a little late, and I-I should just, um...(starts to leave)
Phoebe: (singing) I stepped in something icky.
(Gunther tries to swoop in to ask Rachel out.)
(An old West style showdown starts with Joey and the Hombre Man staring each other down as the store guy slowly lets in the first customer while Joey and the Hombre Man get ready to draw. In slow motion they spot the customer, eye each other, draw, and as the customer walks into the middle Joey's bottle misfires but the Hombre Man spays it into the customer's eyes.)
Phoebe: (On the phone, in New York) Uh, hello, this is Ross Gellers personal physician, Dr. Philange.
SUSIE: Oh, shoot, we gotta go, got a reservation in 30 minutes.
(Joey hands her the book and she puts it in the freezer.)
Janice: (Ross is still taking their photo) Oh, I'm gonna blow this one up, and I'm gonna write 'Reunited' in glitter.