words in movies
[Scene: ATM vestibule, Jill Goodacre is on the cellular phone. Chandler's thoughts are in italics.]
Jill: (on phone) Hi Mom, it's Jill.
Chandler: She's right, it's Jill. Jill Goodacre. Oh my God. I am trapped in an ATM vestibule with Jill Goodacre! (pause) Is it a vestibule? Maybe it's an atrium. Oh, yeah, that is the part to focus on, you idiot!
Jill: (on phone) Yeah, I'm fine. I'm just stuck at the bank, in an ATM vestibule.
Chandler: Jill says vestibule... I'm going with vestibule.
Jill: (on phone) I'm fine. No, I'm not alone... I don't know, some guy.
Chandler: Oh! Some guy. Some guy. 'Hey Jill, I saw you with some guy last night. Yes, he was some guy.
(Chandler strides proudly across the vestibule and Jill stares at him.)
Jill: (awkwardly) Would you like to call somebody? (offering phone)
Joey: (to everyone) Oh my God! He's trapped in an ATM vestibule with Jill Goodacre! (on phone) Chandler, listen. (says something intentionally garbled)
Jill: Would you like some gum?
Jill: (checks) Sorry, it's not.
Chandler: Oh, then no thanks. What the hell was that? Mental note: If Jill Goodacre offers you gum, you take it. If she offers you mangled animal carcass, you take it.
Chandler: You know, on second thought, gum would be perfection. (Jill gives him a stick of gum, and a strange look) 'Gum would be perfection'? 'Gum would be perfection.' Could have said 'gum would be nice,' or 'I'll have a stick,' but no, no, no, no. For me, gum is perfection. I loathe myself.
(Chandler waits until Jill is looking, then starts to blow a bubble. But instead of blow one, he accidentally spits the gum out of his mouth and hits the wall.)
Jill: Are you alright?
Jill: My God, you're choking! (she runs over and gives him the Heimlich, the gum flies from his mouth) That better?
Jill: Perfection?
[Scene: ATM vestibule, Chandler and Jill are sitting below the counter with two pens dangling from their chains in front of them. Jill is showing Chandler how to swing the pen around his head.]
Jill: Chandler, we've been here for an hour doing this! Now watch, it's easy.
Jill: Ready? (she swings the pen around her head in a circle)
Jill: No, you've got to whip it.
Jill: Well, this has been fun.
Jill: Well, goodbye Chandler. I had a great blackout. (she kisses him on the cheek) See ya.
Jill: Oh no-no-no, hes just I dont know, hes just a little bookish.
RACHEL: It's just this thing. Every year we would go out on my dad's boat and watch the fireworks. Mom always hated it because the ocean air made her hair all big. My sister Jill would be throwing up over the side and my dad would be upset becasue nobody was helping and then when we did help he would scream at us for doing it wrong. But then when the fireworks started, everybody just shut up, you know, and it'd get really cold, and we would all just sort of smush under this one blanket. It never occured to anybody to bring another one. And now it's just...
Jill: (To Ross) And you! I throw myself at you and you say no, how gay are you?
Jill: (covers her eyes and starts crying) Im sorry Rachel, Im sorry
Jill: Yeah but it wasnt for me, it was for a friend.
Jill: Youll never believe what just happened, Ross just totally blew me off and he didnt even tell me why!
Jill: And yknow what I said to him? "Im gonna hire a lawyer and Im gonna sue you and take all your money. Then Im gonna cut you off!"
Rachel: Hey! Have you guys seen Jill? I cant find her anywhere.
Jill: Right! But, I am sorry.
Donny: Ok Henrietta, you've picked Jack and Jill went up the hill.
Jill: (entering) I dont want to talk about it.
Jill: Totally, I love them! And, maybe you could finish telling me about all the different kinds of sand.
Jill: Hes the kind of guy youre friends with, yknow? But hes not the kind of guy you date. Hes the kind of guy youd date because you did. Me, not so much.
Written by: Jill Condon & Any Toomin Transcribed by: Eric Aasen
Chandler: (starts crying) I-I cant believe Jills gone. (They all look at him.) I cant help it, I opened a gate.
Jill: Seeing some more of your super-cool slides.
Written by: Jill Condon & Amy Toomin Transcribed by: Eric Aasen
Rachel: Jill, honey, I think this is the best thing that couldve ever happened to you. I mean you needed to get out on your own anyway! And you know when I did it, I-I-I at first I was scared, and look at me now! Im the only daughter dad is proud of! Okay, well this is, this is what youre gonna do. Youre gonna get a job, youre gonna get an apartment, and then Ill help you and you can stay with us. Right Pheebs, she can stay with us?
Jill: That he wouldnt pay for my lawyer! Then he told me to come here and learn about the value of money from the one daughter hes actually proud off.
Phoebe: No. No. Its just I was umm, I was with Ross and Jill after you left and umm, Im pretty sure I saw a little spark between them.
Ross: Yknow what? I think I can take care of myself, Ill talk to you later. Good-bye. (Hangs up the phone and turns to find Jill sitting really close to him.) Whoa! Uh, that was your sister actually. She-she thinks that youre just using me.
Jill: Ugh! I cannot believe you did this too me! You had me doubting how smart I was! (Gasps) You had me doubting my fashion sense!
Jill: Oh, thats so great! Okay, Im really gonna do this! I dont know how to thank you guys.
Ross: Hi Jill.
Jill: Hi!
Jill: Oh my God, Rachel!
Rachel: Oh my God, Jill!
Phoebe: Sorry Jill.
Jill: So who made her queen of the world?
Jill: Hey!
Jill: No! They did! (Points to Phoebe and Ross)
Jill: No you stop!
Jill: She took all my stuff.
Jill: You stop!
Rachel: Jill?
Rachel: With my sister Jill and my ex-boyfriend Ross?
Jill: No! Yknow what Rachel? Youre right, yknow he has been really nice to me.
Rachel: With Ross and Jill?
Jill: (entering) Sorry Im late, whats up?
Jill: You think so too?
Jill: Yeah.
Jill: Me go out with Ross?! No! God no! What would make you think that?
Jill: No! I mean hes nice.
Jill: Fine, then lets just say hes not my type.
Ross: Sorry-sorry Jill.
Jill: What?
Rachel: She-she died Jill.
(We see that Ross is returning to his apartment with Jill.)
Jill: Its yours!
Jill: (entering) Hi!
Jill: Hey!
Jill: (laughs) Me too.
Jill: Really?!
Ross: (entering) Hi Jill!
(We see that Ross is taking off Jills coat.)
Jill: You dont want him, but you dont want me to have him?
[Scene: Central Perk, time lapse, Rachel is at the counter as Jill enters.]
Jill: Its probably because not mature enough. Or smart enough. Maybe he doesnt like the way I dressNo that cant be it. Its really gotta be the smart thing. Oh Im so stupid! Im just like this incredibly pretty stupid girl!
Jill: Hey!
Jill: Oh, Mr. Scientist has to get all technical!
Jill: Oh great! Thanks Ross, youre such a good friend!
Jill: But you know what might really cheer me up?
Jill: Why?!
Jill: I dont understand, do you want to go out with Ross?
Jill: Why are you so jealous of me?
Jill: Who?!
Ross: You damn kids! You ring my bell one more time, I swear to (Opens the door to find Jill standing there.) Ohh, uh Jill. Umm, that-thats just a little game I play with the kids down the hall. Umm, theyve really taken a liking to me. (Quickly looks out to see if theyre watching.) Uhh whats-whats-whats the matter?
Jill: So? (Kisses him passionately.)
Jill: You asked him too?!
Jill: (happily) Okay, see ya! (Exits.)
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Rachel is ranting about Jill to Chandler and Monica.]
Rachel: Jill this is not about me being jealous of you! This is about you being a brat! Wanting what you cant have!
Jill: Cant have?! Excuse me, the only thing I cant have is dairy! (Starts to storm out.)
Ross: You take care Jill.
Jill: (hits him) Shut up! I did not sound like that at all!
Jill: Well okay, if it means that much to you, then Ill ask him out.
Jill: Oh no! But I just walked past three sales and I didnt go in. How strong am I?
Jill: Yeah. Ooh, I know what this is missing! Alcohol!
[Scene: Central Perk, Rachel is there as Jill enters to start her date with Ross.]
Jill: (To Rachel) Daddy cut me off.
Jill: Okay, I bought a boat.
[Scene: Central Perk, everyone is there as Jill enters.]
Ross: (To Rachel) You uh, you may have been right about Jill.
Jill: (gasps) Thats the best one! Oh my God, (hugs him) thank you so much!
Jill: Were you this cute in high school?
Jill: Oh great! (Goes to get it as the phone rings.)
Rachel: Dont!! (Joey backs away frightened.) (To Jill) Honey, what are you doing here?!
Jill: Hey! You have no right to tell me what to do.
Ross: Look I-I realize if anything were to happen with me and Jill then nothing could ever happen with us!
Ross and Rachel while looking at each other surprised and shocked: Jill?
Ross: Hi Jill.
Jill: Hi!
Rachel: Oh my God, Jill!
Monica: Rach? (Points to Jill.)
Jill: Oh my God, Rachel!
Teleplay by: Jill Condon & Amy Toomin Story by: Andrew Reich & Ted Cohen Transcribed by: Eric Aasen
Part I Written by: Michael Borkow Part II Teleplay by: Shana Goldberg-Meehan & Scott Silveri Part II Story by: Jill Condon & Amy Toomin Part I Transcribed by: Eric Aasen Part II Transcribed by: Aaron D. Miller
Jill: This is where Ross and I are meeting for our date. So, what do you think? (She spins to show Rachel the outfit shes wearing.)
Jill: (entering, carrying a bunch of shopping bags) I just had the hardest day. Those bags are so heavy. (Sets them down.)
Jill: Yknow, thanks for trying to cheer me up, but Im not gonna date some random guy from your work.