words in movies
[Scene: Rachels office, Rachel and Sophie are sitting at their desks working as Joanna walks in.]
Rachel: Oh, uh, Joanna I was wondering if I could ask you something. Theres an opening for an assistant buyer in Junior Miss
Joanna: (interrupting) Okay, but that would actually be a big step down for me.
Joanna: Oh. Well, I wish I could say no, but you cant stay my assistant forever. Neither can you Sophie, but for different reasons.
Joanna: Really? Well, in that case
Joanna: Thats fine, actually Im on the hiring committee, so therell be at least one friendly face.
Joanna: You know, Junior Miss is where I started. Oh, I had to sleep with the ugliest guy to get that job.
Joanna: No-ho-ho! (pause) Yeah. (pause) I mean, no-no-no-no-no, dont you worry, Im sure with your qualifications you wont need to sleep with some guy to get that job. Although, I might need some convincing.
Joanna: Kidding! God, I feel wild today!
[Scene: Bloomingdales, Rachel is meeting with Mr. Posner, Mrs. Lynch, and Joanna the hiring committee.]
Joanna: Filing system? Oh-oh! You mean those-those little colored labels you put on all the folders? (to the committee) It certainly did brighten up the inside of the filing cabinets.
Rachel: Yes, Joanna really has been an incredible mentor to me.
Joanna: Oh. And Rachel has been really incredible in getting my morning bagel for me. Its amazing how she gets it right almost every time!
Joanna: Oh yes, well theres the coffee too. (to the committee) Rachel can carry two things at once!
Joanna: (interrupting) And Rachel shouldnt have any problem with that. The only problem might be getting a little too friendly, if you know what I mean.
Joanna: With them, under them, whats the difference? Eh, Rach?
[Scene: Rachels office, Rachel is confronting Joanna about her interview.]
Rachel: (entering Joannas office) Umm, Joanna? I wanna talk about that interview.
Joanna: I thought it went very well.
Joanna: Rachel, please, dont make a scene.
Joanna: Sophie, get in here! (Sophie enters) You see! Now youre making Sophie uncomfortable!
Joanna: Congratulations! You now just crossed the line into completely useless. Get out. (Sophie starts to cry and leaves)
Joanna: What?! What would make you think that?
Joanna: Wait-wait-wait-wait! You can put your sad little muffin back in its drawer. If you must know the truth, I didnt want to lose a perfectly good assistant.
Joanna: Thats why I said all those things about your flirting and your drinking
Joanna: Oh, I mustve said that after you left.
Joanna: That you enjoyed the occasional drink ing binge.
Joanna: Wait-wait-wait-wait-wait-wait-wait-wait!! If youre gonna get all sensitive about it! I dont want to lose you. What if I, create a position for you? Ill make you an assistant buyer in this department.
Joanna: You can have your own office, and a raise! Effective tomorrow.
Joanna: Done!
Joanna: Sophie, get in here! (Sophie peeks in around the corner)
[Scene: Rachels office, she is coming in for the day carrying a picture for her new office. Mrs. Lynch is coming out of Joannas office, carrying a box.]
Rachel: Oh, hi Mrs. Lynch! Is Joanna in already?
Mrs. Lynch: Joanna passed away last night.
Rachel: Yes, so close. Mrs. Lynch, I know that this is an emotional and difficult time, for all of us. But by any chance did Joanna send any paperwork your way before it happened.
Rachel: Oh, Sophie, I guess you didnt hear about Joanna
(She goes back and forth, not sure what to do first, put the bagel down or grab the key. She finally puts the bagel down and grabs the key and goes over to unlock Joanna.)
Joanna: Oh, I know and hes soo sweet! Listen, he said he was going to call, so put him straight through.
Joanna: You tell your friend Chandler that were definately broken up this time.
Rachel: Okay, my boss, Joanna, when you left, she started asking questions about you...
Joanna: Because if you feel uncomfortable with your friend dating someone you work for, there are always ways to fix...that.
Joanna: A couple of hours, I feel awful.
Joanna: Great! Im looking forward to it. Rachel, any messages?
Mark: Hi. I just talked to Joanna, and she loves you. You got it, you got the job.
Chandler: No-no-no-no-no-no-no!! I cant get myself right out of them! You must have me confused with the Amazing Chandler!! Come on, you have to unlock me, she could be gone for hours, and Im cold, and (Stops and looks up the skirt on a statue behind Joannas desk.)
[Scene: Joannas office, Rachel and Chandler are still negotiating.]
Joanna: (entering) Did he call?
Joanna: Oh, and hes got such a good heart! Doesnt he have a good heart?
Joanna: Rachel, I need the Versachi invoice. (to Chandler) Hello! You dont work for me.
[Scene: Joannas office, Joanna and Chandler are making out on her chair. Chandler isnt wearing any pants.]
Joanna: (to Rachel) So ah, whats wrong with him?
Joanna: I know that.
Joanna: Bing! Thats a great name.
Joanna: Me too.
Joanna: Oh no, no-no-no, is he ah, married, or involved with anyone?
Joanna: Oh, Rachel, (pause) actually, y'know what, forget it.
[Rachels boss, Joanna, enters]
[Scene: Rachels office, Joannas telling Rachel, her side of the story.]
Joanna: Chandler is fantastic!!
Joanna: Awkward? Why should he feel awkward?
Joanna: Wasnt it?
Joanna: You too.
Joanna: Well, thanks again for lunch.
Joanna: It was, wasnt it?
Joanna: So...
Joanna: Dont spoil it.
Joanna: What?
Joanna: Wait. I wanna show you something.
Joanna: What are you doing?
Joanna: Why?
Joanna: Uh-oh, tunnel. (The phone gets cut off)
Joanna: (locking her door) Oh.
Joanna: (on speaker phone) Im really sorry but I may be a little while longer.
Joanna: I cant!!
Rachel: Wait a minute! What are you gonna tell Joanna?
[Scene: Joannas office, Rachel and Chandler are having a little tug-of-war with his pants.]
Rachel: So did you break up with Joanna?
Rachel: (introduces them) Joanna, this is my friend Chandler Bing (to Chandler) Joanna.
Joanna: I seem to have had a slight office mishap. Could you please get the key off the back of the door for me.
Joanna: Knowing youre here, waiting for me I think its kinda exciting.
Joanna: Im in my bosss car!
Joanna: (from her office) Whos out there?
Joanna: No, we are. Im sad.
Joanna: (answering the phone) Yes. (listens) Uh, cant you wait until tomorrow? (listens) All right. (hangs up) Unbelievable!!
Joanna: (kisses him) Ill be back in ten minutes. (Starts to leave)
[Cut to Joannas outer office, where Rachel and Sophie work. They are both coming back from lunch.]
Joanna: Well, this isnt how I was hoping how this would end, but I guess I have to appreciate your honesty.
Chandler: Hello, Joanna (Realises he doesnt know her last name) s office.
Rachel: Okay, swear you wont tell, but when Mark left he gave me a key to Joannas office. Do you wanna see the list?
Chandler: Of course, I didnt get to enjoy any of that, because Joannas such a big, dull dud!
Joanna: Why?! Why?! He said hed call. Why hasnt he called?
Joanna: The only person that should feel awkward is you, and you didnt tell him not to call me, did you?
Rachel: Oh, Chandler!! All right, this is it! (Grabs the key) You never see Joanna again!
Chandler: Hey uh, Rach, funny story. I ah, bumped into Joanna on the street yesterday.
Chandler: (entering with Rachel) Im telling ya, Joannas got it all wrong. Okay? All I said was, This was fun. Lets do it again sometime. Ill give you a call.
Joanna: No, no, that was my boss. I have to go.
Joanna: Oh God, we just clicked! Yknow how people just click? Like he came by to pick me up, and I opened the door, and it was just like, click! Did he tell you?
Joanna: (Coming out of the shower wearing nothing but a towel) Hello, Rachel. (She goes into Chandlers bedroom)
Joanna: Just a little gag gift somebody gave me. (Shes holding a pair of handcuffs) Put your hands together.
Joanna: Oh great! Ill keep it in my butt with your nose. (She grabs the cookie and walks out.)
[Scene: Rachels office, Chandler and Joanna are returning from their lunch date. He is telling her about her mascara problem. Rachel is already there.]
Rachel: My boss, Joanna? Wow, that mustve been awkward.
Joanna: Sophie, would you please climb out of my butt. Why hasnt he called, Rachel? Why?
[Scene: Joannas office, Chandler, still handcuffed to the chair, is looking through the lingerie catalogue by turning the pages with his teeth. The phone rings and Chandler answers it with his nose.]
Ross: Why does Joanna need two assistants, how, how lazy is she?
Joanna: Rachel, could you come in here for a moment, please?
Joanna: Would you? Or, is it just to sad and desperate, and y'know something that Sophie would do?
ROSS: Oh I-, Oh wait, Tony can you hang on? That's the other line. [gets the other line] Hello. Oh yeah she's here but uh, can she call you back? OK thanks. [hangs up the other line] Call Joanna. [back on with Tony] Hi.
Rachel: Yeah, sure. Umm, they didnt have poppy seed bagels, so I (Enters Joannas office and sees her handcuffed to her chair wearing nothing but a slip) Oh my word!