words in movies
[Scene: Joey's place. Rachel and Joey are talking]
Joey: All right, all right, all right, let's play one more time, ok? And remember, if I win you do not move to Paris.
Joey: Just flip!
Joey: Damnit!
Joey: Hey!
Chandler (to Joey): At what point did it stop being funny that I took her passport?
Ross: No, no. This will always be your place. It would be too sad. Plus, how much a month does it cost to feed Joey?
Monica: Oh, no. He doesn't have time for that. But if you want, you can go help him and Joey pack up the guest room.
[Scene: Guest room. Joey has his head wrapped in bubbled wrap and Chandler is punching him. Ross enters the room.]
Joey: Try it, I can't feel a thing! (Ross starts punching him too)
Chandler: No, no, no, guys. She's right. We should get to work. I'll take stuff out of the closet, Joey you pack 'em and Ross you re-pack whatever Joey packs.
(Joey takes the bubble wrap off his head)
Joey: You guys hear a ringing?
Joey: Hey! Handcuffs! And fur line, nice! I didn't know you guys had it in ya!
Joey: Mhm, maybe she used them with another boyfriend. Maybe Richard!
Joey: (entering the room) Hey.
Joey: Oh, she's putting Emma down, she'll be over in a second.
Joey: Now it just hit her that she's leaving and she's kind of emotional so no one say anything to set her off, ok?
Joey: What did I just say?
Chandler: I know, she's been such a big part of my life. And it feels like when Melrose Place got cancelled. (Ross and Joey looks puzzled) I mean... oh, forget it. I miss Melrose Place!
Joey (to Ross): You know, I had a chance to stop her too!
Joey: Who loses fifty seven coin tosses in a row? Head she wins, tails I lose. (he stops and starts realizing something) Wait a minute...
Joey: I forgot to pick up my dry cleaning!
Joey: Huh, if I had to guess I'd say Rachel is putting on the bubble wrap and Phoebe is doing the punching.
Ross: (to Joey) Oh no, she took down Monica... And I'm the crier in the family. Oh God! I could be next. Maybe she won't talk with me if it looks like we're deep in converstation. Oh, so that thing you said about the thing. It really made me think about that other thing.
Joey: I really made you think about that thing uh?
[Scene: Monica's living room. We look outside to the balcony where Rachel is saying goodbye to Joey.]
Phoebe: I don't know. But, God, Joey seems to be handling it suprisingly well.
(Rachel and Joey hug, and Rachel turns to enter the apartment through the side window again. At that moment Joey tries to climb over the edge of the balcony.)
(Rachel rushes back and pulls Joey back onto the balcony, and takes him inside.)
Joey: (still very emotional) Lucky bastard!
[Scene: Monica's apartment continued... Phoebe, Chandler, Monica and Joey are sitting down and Ross is pacing up and down.]
Joey: All right, let's think about this. I mean, there's got to be an explanation. Uh... did you do anything to make her mad?
Ross: (annoyed) O-kay... I mean, don't I deserve anything? I mean, a few tears, a cursory hug? (Joey gives Ross a hug) NOT FROM YOU! (Joey lets go)
(Ross takes big steps leaving for Joey and Rachel's apartment, where Rachel is going through her papers.)
Joey: I'm sure he's not more bummed out than I am.
Chandler: Joey and I can finish up in the guest room.
Joey: Oh, yeah, yeah, good idea. (he mimes hitting his head with his fist)
Chandler: (to Joey) You couldn't be cool. (he goes to the guest bedroom)
Phoebe and Joey: Yeah.
Joey: Who's that dirty old lady?
Joey: Come on here, have a seat.
Monica: All right, Chandler get the coats. Erica let's go. Phoebe and Joey, keep packing! Oh my God we're gonna have a baby. All right. We're gonna have a baby! OH MY GOD, WE'RE GONNA HAVE A BABY! Oh God, oh God, I got to sit down, I got to sit down. Ooh! (she's hyperventilating)
Joey: Chandler, wait, wait, wait...
Joey: If you get a second, find out where she got that cheeseburger.
Joey: A little more.
Joey: A little more, a little more. (she stuffs some more down his pants and Joey's assesses the how many there already are in there.) A little more... All right. Okay, all right, let's do this.
Joey: Yeah. All right, now give me your best shot.
Joey: (in pain) Doesn't work... (he falls down on on his knees with his head on the floor)
Ross: (To Joey) Sir Limps-A-Lot, I came up with that.
Chandler: Bye-bye little puppet Joey hand?
Joey: Excellent, I'll be there.
Joey: Oh, hey, dont forget your shirt.
Joey: Ahhhhhhhhhh
The A.D: Yeah, we loves em. Ive never seen him with(He gets a whiff of Joey and starts smelling around.)
Joey: Thank you!
Joey: Ma, I don't mean to be disrespectful, but... what the hell are you talking about?! I mean, what about you?
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Phoebe, Chandler, Joey, and Monica are there as Rachel enters.]
Rachel: Joey has got a secret peephole!
(He walks over and stands behind Joey.)
Joey: (thinking) I slept with Monica.
Joey: I can't believe you guys are moving.
Joey: No! I am not a pervert! Okay? It's just I just Kinda
Phoebe: We're so stupid! Do you know what's going on in there? They're trying to take Joey!
Joey: But you can't stay with Phoebe, Ross! We're-we're roomies!
Joey: (To the pledge volunteers) How ya doin'? Welcome. Good to see ya!
Joey: We figured we could be late because you guys were gonna be on time (he points the foam finger at the girls)
Joey: Uhh, Monica?
Joey: That makes sense!
Joey: What?!! (He turns around and stares at Chandler who's silently pleading with Joey to go along with it.) No I'm not!!
Joey: What are you doing?
Joey: Why are you doing this?
Joey: When theyre hungry enough, theyll come in.
Joey: Dude, stop talking crazy and make us some tea!
Joey: A hamster? What, those things are like 10 bucks.
Joey: But, I love you.
The Presenter: in the category of Favorite Returning Male Character the nominees are: John Wheeler from General Hospital (Applause), Gavin Grant from The Young and the Restless (Applause), Dunkin Harrington from Passions (Applause), and Joey Tribbiani from Days of Our Lives (Applause). And the Soapie goes to (She opens the envelope) Gavin Grant from The Young and the Restless!
Joey: Thank you, but it would take me forever to pay you that money back and I dont want that hanging over my head. Okay? Besides, as soon as my insurance kicks in I can get all the free operations I want! Yeah, Im thinking Ill probably start with that laser eye surgery too.
Joey: All right, all right. (he comes out from their apartment with a huge sandwich in his hand)
Joey: Shes a woman!
[Scene: Estelle's (Joey's Agent) Office, Joey is there.]
Joey: No! Everything's gettin' all messed up, y'know? Emily won't let Ross see Rachel, we're not gonna stop seeing Rachel, hence Ross stops seeing us!
Chandler: Okay. (notices that Joey is wearing some really tight jeans) My word! Those are snug.
Joey: Thanks!
Joey: It's not.
Joey: (disappointed) Oh.
Joey: Done!
Ross: And it can't be Joey.
Joey: Wait a second, I could star in it!
Monica: I guess Joey was right, it does nothing.
Joey: Hey, how do you spell suspicious?
Joey: You're driving me crazy with that!
Joey: Yeah, I think we said good-bye to that when we invented hammer darts.
Joey: No! No! No! No, Im not going to punch Chandler.
Joey: Yeah, that's the uh, game we were playing.
Joey: Hey!
Joey: $200? Are you sure Pheebs? I mean, after what Sesame Street did to ya?
Joey: No ... the leather sticks to my ass. You know, this isn't fair. What makes you think that I'm just gonna sleep with her and then blow her off? Huh? Can't you guys open your minds to the possibility that I actally like her, and might want something real? (pause) Look, the truth is, I haven't felt this way about anyone since Rachel, ok? I didn't think I could ever love again.
Joey: You're right, you're right, I'll get back to work.
[Scene: Chandler, Joey, and Ross's, Chandler is sitting on one of the chairs and the duck is running around him and quacking.]
Ross: (To Chandler) And shame on you! You should know better, Joey needs to work. (To Joey) Now come on!
Joey: Heh... I was bluffing.
Joey: All right, Rach, the big question is, does he like you? All right? Because if he doesn't like you, this is all a moo-point.
Phoebe: Okay but thats why you have to buy it, so it can fulfil its Christmas destiny, otherwise there gonna throw it into the chipper. Tell him, Joey
(Joey quickly tries to hide Hugsy by throwing it over his head.)
Joey: Oh, its this big budget period movie about these three Italian brothers who come to America around the turn of the century. Its really classy! Oh, and the director is supposed to be the next, next Martin Scorcese.
Joey: Oh, y'know the same thing happened to me one time.
Chandler: Well, Joey, I wrote a little song today. It's called: Get Up.
Joey: Yeah, wow, sorry Rach.
Joey: They're brother and sister!!!
Chandler: Okay, but this is the last time. (singing) With a chick-chick here, and a chick-chick there. Here a chick, there a chick, everywhere a chick-chick-(Joey enters)-chickeeeen.
Chandler: Yeah, I believe I was talking to Joey, alright there, Mother-Kisser? (Goes to the counter)
(Joey enters and Chandler pushes her away.)
Chandler: Could I be more sorry. (Looks at Joey.)
Joey: (Reading the scene set up.) Okay, it's a typical New York City apartment. Two girls are just hanging out.
Rachel: Oh, y'know Joey, you are sick!
Joey: What's the matter?!
Joey: All right! Here we go! 1999! The year of Joey!
Monica: Oh no, wait! Joey!
Joey: Chandler.
Joey: Yeah.
Joey: Okay, great!
Joey: Yeah!
Joey: So? Who would you rather have kiss you, me or Chandler?
Joey: Pheebs! Pheebs! Ross wants to kiss you at midnight!
Rachel: (To Joey) Happy New Year, Joey!
Joey: (flipping to the last page) Ew, you get thrown from a horse into an electric fence.
Joey: I know, I know..., but that's okay. I mean, we can control ourselves, we're not animals.
Ross: Fine! No more dinosaur stuff! Can I talk about fossils? (Joey is about to sit down and hears this so instead he groans and exits.)
Joey: Really? Who-who have you taught?
(Both Joey and Chandler and Monica and Rachel jump up and down for joy.)
Joey: Yeah that'd be great! Thanks Pheebs!
Chandler: (waking Joey) Hey, check out that girl! She is really hot!
Chandler and Joey: Hey!
Ross: Okay! (She leaves.) (To Chandler and Joey.) Hey!
Joey: Umm, okay.
Joey: That's great. But uh, I'm not really expecting a lot of calls.
Joey: Dude, if you think Fireball's relaxing, you've obviously have never played.
Joey: (muffled by the mouth guard) Dude! I am trying to sleep! (Shrugs to say, "Whats up with that?")
Joey: Uh yeah, right here. (He punches his fist through the wall next to the door.)
(The wool-bound trio returns to the table. Rachel has to rush ahead to avoid becoming tangled. Joey brings the shopping bag over to Phoebe, and takes out a nice cardigan.)
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, its after Ross and Joeys talk with Frank, and Phoebes is finding out what happened.]
Joey: No.
Joey: Oh thats okay. Hey, actually in a way its kinda nice. Me, bringing the food of my ancestors, you, the food of yours!
Joey: Yes!
Joey: You look like a freak.
Joey: Clear the tracks for the boobie payback express. Next stop: Rachel Green. (He goes into the bathroom. We hear a scream and he comes out, closely followed by Monica in a towel)
Joey: No, no, look. All I’m saying is that you’re my agent, ok? And you’re not getting me into any auditions and I’m tired of it.
Joey: Or.. we could flip a coin, and then multiply the..