words in movies
[Scene: Joey's place. Rachel and Joey are talking]
Joey: All right, all right, all right, let's play one more time, ok? And remember, if I win you do not move to Paris.
Joey: Just flip!
Joey: Damnit!
Joey: Hey!
Chandler (to Joey): At what point did it stop being funny that I took her passport?
Ross: No, no. This will always be your place. It would be too sad. Plus, how much a month does it cost to feed Joey?
Monica: Oh, no. He doesn't have time for that. But if you want, you can go help him and Joey pack up the guest room.
[Scene: Guest room. Joey has his head wrapped in bubbled wrap and Chandler is punching him. Ross enters the room.]
Joey: Try it, I can't feel a thing! (Ross starts punching him too)
Chandler: No, no, no, guys. She's right. We should get to work. I'll take stuff out of the closet, Joey you pack 'em and Ross you re-pack whatever Joey packs.
(Joey takes the bubble wrap off his head)
Joey: You guys hear a ringing?
Joey: Hey! Handcuffs! And fur line, nice! I didn't know you guys had it in ya!
Joey: Mhm, maybe she used them with another boyfriend. Maybe Richard!
Joey: (entering the room) Hey.
Joey: Oh, she's putting Emma down, she'll be over in a second.
Joey: Now it just hit her that she's leaving and she's kind of emotional so no one say anything to set her off, ok?
Joey: What did I just say?
Chandler: I know, she's been such a big part of my life. And it feels like when Melrose Place got cancelled. (Ross and Joey looks puzzled) I mean... oh, forget it. I miss Melrose Place!
Joey (to Ross): You know, I had a chance to stop her too!
Joey: Who loses fifty seven coin tosses in a row? Head she wins, tails I lose. (he stops and starts realizing something) Wait a minute...
Joey: I forgot to pick up my dry cleaning!
Joey: Huh, if I had to guess I'd say Rachel is putting on the bubble wrap and Phoebe is doing the punching.
Ross: (to Joey) Oh no, she took down Monica... And I'm the crier in the family. Oh God! I could be next. Maybe she won't talk with me if it looks like we're deep in converstation. Oh, so that thing you said about the thing. It really made me think about that other thing.
Joey: I really made you think about that thing uh?
[Scene: Monica's living room. We look outside to the balcony where Rachel is saying goodbye to Joey.]
Phoebe: I don't know. But, God, Joey seems to be handling it suprisingly well.
(Rachel and Joey hug, and Rachel turns to enter the apartment through the side window again. At that moment Joey tries to climb over the edge of the balcony.)
(Rachel rushes back and pulls Joey back onto the balcony, and takes him inside.)
Joey: (still very emotional) Lucky bastard!
[Scene: Monica's apartment continued... Phoebe, Chandler, Monica and Joey are sitting down and Ross is pacing up and down.]
Joey: All right, let's think about this. I mean, there's got to be an explanation. Uh... did you do anything to make her mad?
Ross: (annoyed) O-kay... I mean, don't I deserve anything? I mean, a few tears, a cursory hug? (Joey gives Ross a hug) NOT FROM YOU! (Joey lets go)
(Ross takes big steps leaving for Joey and Rachel's apartment, where Rachel is going through her papers.)
Joey: I'm sure he's not more bummed out than I am.
Chandler: Joey and I can finish up in the guest room.
Joey: Oh, yeah, yeah, good idea. (he mimes hitting his head with his fist)
Chandler: (to Joey) You couldn't be cool. (he goes to the guest bedroom)
Phoebe and Joey: Yeah.
Joey: Who's that dirty old lady?
Joey: Come on here, have a seat.
Monica: All right, Chandler get the coats. Erica let's go. Phoebe and Joey, keep packing! Oh my God we're gonna have a baby. All right. We're gonna have a baby! OH MY GOD, WE'RE GONNA HAVE A BABY! Oh God, oh God, I got to sit down, I got to sit down. Ooh! (she's hyperventilating)
Joey: Chandler, wait, wait, wait...
Joey: If you get a second, find out where she got that cheeseburger.
Joey: A little more.
Joey: A little more, a little more. (she stuffs some more down his pants and Joey's assesses the how many there already are in there.) A little more... All right. Okay, all right, let's do this.
Joey: Yeah. All right, now give me your best shot.
Joey: (in pain) Doesn't work... (he falls down on on his knees with his head on the floor)
Joey: (looking at the checkbook) Wow! Look at this! He wrote a check for 50,000 dollars to Hugo Ligrens Ring Design. (Monica is stunned) Oh, sorry, what do you think the good news is?
Joey: Oh, ain't that nice? The three of you trying on slutty lingerie together.
(Joey stares around dumbly looking for the "talking pigeon")
Joey: (to Charlie) Alright, have a good time. (they kiss)
[Scene: Central Perk. Joey and Charlie on the couch. Rachel enters]
Joey: Bye.
Joey: Just... seeing what it'd be like to be a paleontologist... it's fun, yeah!
Joey: So you're ruling out surrogacy?
Joey: So, I don't have to learn what that means?
Chandler: (stopping Joey) ah-ha!
(Joey moves close to Ross and whispers something in his ear)
Joey: (talking to a pineapple in his hand) God, you're beautiful...why are we fighting this?You know you want it to happen as much as I do.
Phoebe: You like Joey?
Joey: Shh. Shh. Dont try to talk, well get you up to your room, well soak your feet, youll be okay.
Chandler: So you might say, the ring is irreplaceable? (Gives Joey a little squeeze.)
Joey: Hello?
Joey: Yeah, yeah, in honor of their 35th wedding anniversary, I had a star named after them.
Ross: Joey! Hey, I need to talk to Charlie. Is she there?
Joey: No. no... eh... she went shopping with Rachel. Why? What's up?
Joey: No! No! I am not a sex addict!
Joey: Well, just wake him up!
Joey: Oh! How's it going?
[Scene: Joey's apartment. Joey is sitting on his bed and the phone rings]
(Ross drags Joey into the hall and slams the door)
Joey: Look, I dont know why the kids need a youth center anyway! Yknow? They should just watch TV after school like I did and I turned out fine!
Charlie: No! There's nothing to explain. I heard you. Phoebe likes Joey.
(Phoebe walks in wearing a fancy, revealing dress, and stands before Joey)
[Scene: Central Perk. Joey is sitting on the sofa, eating a cookie.]
Joey: (sees Ross) Hey all right, Ross came as doody.
Joey: Have you ever slept in the same bed as a monkey?!
Joey: Then don't go!
Rachel: Uh-huh! Nice try, but you dont get that chair anymore! All right? That is my chair now! You can sit on my lap! (Joey starts to get up.) No I take that back!
Joey: Hey Ross, wouldn't it be great if we could go two straight hours without dropping it?!
Rachel: Joey, its just a chair! Whats the big deal?
(Joey gives Phoebe a thumbs up. Phoebe walks out)
Joey: Yeah, I guess, but whats like heads and whats tails?
Chandler: No. But uh, Joey has, and I usually talk to them in the morning time.
Joey: Mmh-mmh.
Joey: Barbados!
Joey: (entering) Hey! I'm all packed and ready to go!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's erm, Chandler and Joey's, later that morning. The porn is still on, there are three women getting ready to shave the chest of some guy. Joey and Chandler are wondering why that guy is letting them shave his chest, and Monica and Rachel are eating breakfast at the foosball table.]
Joey: That... never happens...
Sarah: (to Joey) Are you a paleontologist?
Joey: Yeah! How you doin'? Yeah alright!
Joey: Hey, hey! You said you're gonna wear a thong, where's the thong?
Joey: Hey!
Joey: (smiling) Will you wear a thong?
Joey: You really should have been more clear about that!
Joey: No, why?
Joey: Oh man!
Joey: Wha...? You're gonna go now? I thought we could hang out?
Joey: I wasn't gonna swim, I was gonna dig a hole! (removes a small plastic spade used by children to play on the beach from his backpack)
Joey: Oh... you got yourself a very weird deal!
Joey: Hey Pheebs! Listen, uh can you do me a favor? I forgot the pin number to my ATM card can, can you get it for me?
(Joey spots them and walks towards them)
Joey: No, eh, oh-oi, easy, it's not a hot dog!
Joey: Oh no-no, no-no I love living with you. It just seems that if youre gonna have a roommate, yknow it might as well be the father.
Joey: Oh! Hey! Thank God you guys are here!
Phoebe: Not Joey.
Joey: Come on, I'll show you guys where to check in (Joey, Chandler and David leave)
Joey: Hey guys!
Joey: (To Ross) Ill tell you about it later. Be cool.
Joey: Damnit!
Joey: Atta boy!
Joey: Hi! Im Dr. Drake Remoray and I have a few routine questions I need to ask you.
Joey: I dont know! Its not like its porn! This is a serious, legitimate movie. Yknow? And the nudity is really important to the story.
Joey: A widower.
[The next one is from Episode 512: The One With Chandlers Work Laugh, Joey and Phoebe are betting on who will reach the treat the fastest, the chick or the duck.]
Phoebe: Well, Ross does. What... You're - you're ruining the plan! Joey, you've - you've fixed him up with his perfect woman!
Joey: No. They really like me over there. They want to do a big profile on me, but I said no.
Joey: Its London, baby! All right, the hotels here. (Points to the map.) Wait. No, we wanna go No. I know. (Sets the map down.) Im gonna have to go into the map. (So Joey literally steps into the map.)
Joey: I'm so bored! Stupid rain, we... we can't do anything.
[Scene: The hall, full of paleontologists. Rachel and Joey are walking around]
Joeys Grandmother: More of Grandmas teramisu.
Joey: Kate Miller it is. (he picks up the Kate Miller badge and sticks it on Rachel's breast)
Joey: Not enough pills in the world, Rach. What about you, you're the single one, seen anybody in there you like?
Joey: Tell me who it is.
Joey: (eagerly) Yeah, who is that?
Rachel: Joey! (she walks away; Joey goes after her teasing and tickling her)
Joey: Come on who? Who do you like? Tell me. You're not getting away that easy. Who do you like, who?
Joey: Yeah.
Ross: Look, I gotta go pick up Ben. Everything so far sounds great Joey, just remember to keep it on the mellow side, okay? Just a couple of guys hanging out playing poker, no-no strippers or anything okay?
Joey: What? Why not? Rach, who can you not get?
Joey: Night.
Joey: Yeah. (they leave)
Rachel: Dont worry, were just gonna search here for an hour, them were gonna go over to Joeys and search, OK?
Monica: All right, well why dont I go out with an ex-boyfriend and do Joey a favor?!
Joey: Please, c'mon, you're the smartest person I know and I really like this girl, ok, I don't wanna lose her.
Joey: I met her at the library. I went in to pee.
Chandler: So do you think uh, Joeys more charming than me?
(Joey laughs)
Joey: No, he really said it.
Rachel: (gasps) Oh my God! Listen to you talkin about having kids. Oh my Joey. (She goes over and hugs him.) Oh, please dont get married before I do.
Joey: He said "erectus"!
Joey: Yeah, and so funny!
[Scene: Joey and Charlie's room]
Joey: Uh, okay Ill-Ill-Ill break it down. (He hands the phone to Phoebe, gets up, picks up a chair, and starts banging it on the floor.)
Joey: Yeah! A little bit, yeah...
Joey: (coming in from his bedroom) What is that?
Joey: Oh well, she said we have nothing in common.