words in movies
[Scene: Joey's place. Rachel and Joey are talking]
Joey: All right, all right, all right, let's play one more time, ok? And remember, if I win you do not move to Paris.
Joey: Just flip!
Joey: Damnit!
Joey: Hey!
Chandler (to Joey): At what point did it stop being funny that I took her passport?
Ross: No, no. This will always be your place. It would be too sad. Plus, how much a month does it cost to feed Joey?
Monica: Oh, no. He doesn't have time for that. But if you want, you can go help him and Joey pack up the guest room.
[Scene: Guest room. Joey has his head wrapped in bubbled wrap and Chandler is punching him. Ross enters the room.]
Joey: Try it, I can't feel a thing! (Ross starts punching him too)
Chandler: No, no, no, guys. She's right. We should get to work. I'll take stuff out of the closet, Joey you pack 'em and Ross you re-pack whatever Joey packs.
(Joey takes the bubble wrap off his head)
Joey: You guys hear a ringing?
Joey: Hey! Handcuffs! And fur line, nice! I didn't know you guys had it in ya!
Joey: Mhm, maybe she used them with another boyfriend. Maybe Richard!
Joey: (entering the room) Hey.
Joey: Oh, she's putting Emma down, she'll be over in a second.
Joey: Now it just hit her that she's leaving and she's kind of emotional so no one say anything to set her off, ok?
Joey: What did I just say?
Chandler: I know, she's been such a big part of my life. And it feels like when Melrose Place got cancelled. (Ross and Joey looks puzzled) I mean... oh, forget it. I miss Melrose Place!
Joey (to Ross): You know, I had a chance to stop her too!
Joey: Who loses fifty seven coin tosses in a row? Head she wins, tails I lose. (he stops and starts realizing something) Wait a minute...
Joey: I forgot to pick up my dry cleaning!
Joey: Huh, if I had to guess I'd say Rachel is putting on the bubble wrap and Phoebe is doing the punching.
Ross: (to Joey) Oh no, she took down Monica... And I'm the crier in the family. Oh God! I could be next. Maybe she won't talk with me if it looks like we're deep in converstation. Oh, so that thing you said about the thing. It really made me think about that other thing.
Joey: I really made you think about that thing uh?
[Scene: Monica's living room. We look outside to the balcony where Rachel is saying goodbye to Joey.]
Phoebe: I don't know. But, God, Joey seems to be handling it suprisingly well.
(Rachel and Joey hug, and Rachel turns to enter the apartment through the side window again. At that moment Joey tries to climb over the edge of the balcony.)
(Rachel rushes back and pulls Joey back onto the balcony, and takes him inside.)
Joey: (still very emotional) Lucky bastard!
[Scene: Monica's apartment continued... Phoebe, Chandler, Monica and Joey are sitting down and Ross is pacing up and down.]
Joey: All right, let's think about this. I mean, there's got to be an explanation. Uh... did you do anything to make her mad?
Ross: (annoyed) O-kay... I mean, don't I deserve anything? I mean, a few tears, a cursory hug? (Joey gives Ross a hug) NOT FROM YOU! (Joey lets go)
(Ross takes big steps leaving for Joey and Rachel's apartment, where Rachel is going through her papers.)
Joey: I'm sure he's not more bummed out than I am.
Chandler: Joey and I can finish up in the guest room.
Joey: Oh, yeah, yeah, good idea. (he mimes hitting his head with his fist)
Chandler: (to Joey) You couldn't be cool. (he goes to the guest bedroom)
Phoebe and Joey: Yeah.
Joey: Who's that dirty old lady?
Joey: Come on here, have a seat.
Monica: All right, Chandler get the coats. Erica let's go. Phoebe and Joey, keep packing! Oh my God we're gonna have a baby. All right. We're gonna have a baby! OH MY GOD, WE'RE GONNA HAVE A BABY! Oh God, oh God, I got to sit down, I got to sit down. Ooh! (she's hyperventilating)
Joey: Chandler, wait, wait, wait...
Joey: If you get a second, find out where she got that cheeseburger.
Joey: A little more.
Joey: A little more, a little more. (she stuffs some more down his pants and Joey's assesses the how many there already are in there.) A little more... All right. Okay, all right, let's do this.
Joey: Yeah. All right, now give me your best shot.
Joey: (in pain) Doesn't work... (he falls down on on his knees with his head on the floor)
Joey: Okay, firstfirst of all, you want to make it look spontaneous. I look down (Looks down), look down, keep looking down; then I look up. (Looks up and smiles.) See? All right, now you try. Look down (Chandler looks down), youre looking down, keep looking down
Joey: Yeah, I got my speech!
Rachel: Now Joey remember, if you win you have to hug me! You hug me!
Joey: (To Rachel) This is it! This is my category.
Joey: Don't worry, there wasn't any sex in it or anything. I haven't dreamt about her like that since I found out about you two--ish.
Phoebe: Oh, look-look, Joey's on TV! Isn't that great? My pledge got Joey on TV! Oh that makes me feelOh no! (Realizes that her deed made her happy and therefore it's selfish and covers her mouth in horror.)
Rachel: Joey! Why did we have to rush out of there so fast?!
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Joey and Rachel are entering.]
Rachel: Joey, you have got to take this back!
Rachel: (looking at the award) No! Joey!
Rachel: Joey I dont think you know what behalf means.
Joey: Come on Rach! No one saw me take it! There was a whole table full of em.
Joey: All right!
Joey: (confused) What you-you dont think Im gonna win?
Joey: Ill take it back tomorrow.
Joey: No. No, Im Joey Tribbiani; we did a scene together yesterday. I-Im the guy in the coma!
Monica: Okay, looks like Ross and I are captains. Okay, so um, I bunnied first so that means I get to pick first. Joey.
Joey: Ah, this is my friend Rachel.
Joey: Hey Jessica.
Rachel: Sup? (Joey glares at her.)
Monica: Joey, I think you should consider something a little less risky. I mean, I think in this market, real estate is your best investment.The Fed. just lowered the rates and the interest on your mortgage is totally deductible. (looks at Chandler) That's right, I know some stuff!
Joey: (To Rachel) Take it back?
Joey: Well, that-that-thats it? Youre gonna, youre gonna put it on your self or anything?
Joey: Yeah, I (Shuts off the TV.) I dont want Stevie to see her like this.
Joey: What award are you practicing for?
Joey: That, is not a cat! {I have to agree with Joey on this one.}
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Phoebe is entering.]
Joey: Oh hey listen I got us tickets to a Knicks game tonight.
Phoebe: (To Joey) Oh hey! How was your audition?
Joey: Uh, well they might be a little mad at me over there.
[Cut to Monica and Ross leaving Joey and Chandlers hotel room in London. As they exit Joey and Chandler enter from the bathroom with both of their pants down around their ankles.]
Joey: Where are you going? The vicar wont be home for hours.
[Scene: Central Perk, Monica and Phoebe are on the couch as Joey enters.]
Joey: Im sorry, do I know you?
Joey: Real estate, huh? Hmmm...
Monica: Oh, Rachel, sweetie, look, here's a really cute picture of Joey and you at the reception.
Joey: Are you kidding me? I never rent a movie without it! (Listens) Oh. (Listens) Uh, okay uh let me call you back. (Hangs up.)
Joey: (to Monica and Phoebe) They loved me!
Joey: Hey, whats the horsepower on this thing?
Joey: (on phone) Oh my God!
Phoebe: (seeing him) Okay, nows not the time Joey. All right? You can yell at me tomorrow.
Joey: Well, no not yet. But the audition went really good.
Joey: They want me to be totally naked in the movie!
Joey: I know! My grandmothers gonna see this!
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Joey is sitting behind the drums wearing safety goggles, hitting them with his sticks as Rachel watches.]
Ross: (glaring at Joey) This would be the place where you explain the hat.
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Joey is entering.]
[Scene: Central Perk, Monica and Joey are there. Joey is reading a newspaper.]
Director: Alright were back! Ten seconds left here we go! Ten! Nine! Eight! Seven! (He continues to count as we hear Joey think)
Joey: Its just I cant because my manager said I (Gets an idea) (Starts singing) "Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you. Happy birthday dear Annie
Joey: I mean come on you guys! My own TV show? I just dont know if Im good enough.
Joey: Hey, Im back!
The Casting Director: Hi-hi Joey.
Joey: So What?
Joey: Wow! Sure! Thats great!
Joey: Yes!
Joey: No. What?
Joey: Nope.
Joey: Thats right.
Joey: Yep.
Joey: Yeah may-maybe you dont tell anyone about this.
Joey: No! Im up for a Soapie!
Joey: I can an A? In-in school? (To Joey) Hey, Im a dork.
Joey: Like what?
Joey: Unless what?
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Phoebe is entering and Rachel is still planning.]
Joey: So? Bring the dog back, you're a hero.
Joey: Oh my God! Thats huge! (Hugs him.) Wait a minute, why come I wasnt invited? And who was going to be your best man? Dont say, "Ross." Do not say, "Ross."
Joey: Wow! This looks great!
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's apartment, Joey and Phoebe are reading a scene from Mac and C.H.E.E.S.E.]
Joey: Thank God!
Joey: Ah.
Joey: Ow!
Joey: (incredulous) Why should I help you?!
Joey: Well maybe we just take that one away. (Picks it up and throws it away.)
Joey: Yeah.
Monica: Joey!
Joey: Wait a minute! Wait a minute! We have a winner!
Joey: The fruit roll up.
Joey: Delicious.
Joey: (to the camera) Hello, Im Joey Tribbiani! Lets play Bamboozled! Erin, you get the first question! In hockey, who is known as The Great One?
(Stryker enters, only its not Joey playing him.)
[Scene: The casting directors office, Joey is there to show off to the director, so to speak.]
The Casting Director: Joey, this is awkward part.
Joey: Rach we had to get out of there because, look what I won! (He whips out the award for Best Supporting Actress that he accepted for Jessica.)
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey, Monica, and Rachel are sitting on the couch and Ross is sitting on the chair, and theyre all talking.]
Rachel: Joey is says Best Supporting Actress!
Joey: Probably Monica and Chandler.
Rachel: Ugh, it was horrible! And-and the interview part went so well, y'know? I even made him laugh. He said something about a boat and I was like, "Well, yeah! If you've got enough life jackets!" (She starts laughing; Chandler and Joey are not amused.) Trust me, it was actually, it was very funny. Anyway, so we were saying good-bye and ugh!
Joey: (Very discouraged) Okay, is there anything else?
Ross: No, NO! (they're moving to the side of the bed, where they sit down) Look, I need to talk to Joey. I mean, you guys just broke up. Before anything more happens between us, I need to know he's okay with it.
Joey: (excitedly) Wow? Wow what?! Wow what?! Who youwhat?!!
Joey: (excitedly) Who you what? Who you what?!
Joey: What?!
Monica: (To Joey) They were lovers.
Joey: (entering) Hello!
Joey: Hey Rach. (Stares at her.)
Joey: Okay, I wanted to surprise you, but for your house-warming gift, I got you a baby-chick and a baby-duck!
Monica: Joey!
Joey: I don't know. We're talking about whipped fish, Monica. I'm just happy I'm keeping it down, y'know?