words in movies
[Scene: The Hallway, Rachel walks up the stairs and knocks on Joeys door.]
Rachel: Joey? Are you in there?
[Cut to inside Monica and Chandlers, Monica, Chandler and Joey are eating breakfast.]
Joey: (hearing Rachel and jumping up with his plate) Oh God! Thats Rachel!
Monica: Joey, you have to talk to her!
Joey: No-no, I cant! I cant! Not after the other night, its just its too weird, okay? Dont tell her Im here! (Turns to run to the bathroom and his bagel falls off the plate onto the floor.) Dont eat that! (Runs to the bathroom as Rachel enters.)
Rachel: Is Joey here?
Monica: I dont see him. Hey! Maybe hes in the sugar bowl! (Opens the sugar bowl) Joey? Nope! (Closes the sugar bowl and they both laugh.)
Rachel: All right. Well listen, if you see Joey will you just tell him uh tell him I miss him. (Exits and Joey enters.)
Monica: (To Joey) Okay, did you hear that?
Joey: Yeah, a naked bagel game? (Picks up his dropped bagel.) (To Chandler) Dude, I dont know. Thats a pretty small hole.
Joey: I cant! Yknow? You guys dont know what its like to put yourself out there like that and just get shot down.
Joey: All right so, so what do I do?
Joey: Yeah. Okay. (Goes to take a bite out of the previously mentioned bagel.) Whoa! (Stops.) I almost forgot this was on your
(Joey enters.)
Joey: Hey.
Joey: Hi.
Rachel: So I thought Joey and I would be okay once we hung out, but its not even like we know how to be with each other anymore.
Monica: Okay, I-Im sorry. You and Joey, your both focusing on this uncomfortable thing, what you need to do is to change the subject. Next time you see him try to get him talking about something else.
Joey: (entering) Hey!
Monica: Uh I really dont know what to tell you Rach, I really dont. I mean, maybe Joey can help you out with your, with your big work problem.
Monica: Yeah Joey shes Rachels got this really big work problem, and it is a head scratcher. Wow! (To Chandler) Yknow what, if were gonna make dinner were gonna have to leave. Yeah. (She and Chandler exit.)
Joey: So you uh, have a big work problem?
Joey: Huh. Okay. (Awkward silence.) So uh, I think Im gonna take off.
Rachel: YeahNo wait! Joey no wait it is. Its something. Its-its umm its my boss.
Joey: Yeah?
Joey: Yeah?
Joey: What?! Oh my-oh my God!
Joey: What he wants to buy your baby?!
Joey: Thats crazy!
Joey: Okay, how did this even happen?
Joey: Man! When you said it was a problem about your boss and the baby I figured it was something about maternity leave.
Rachel: (entering) Hey! Great advice on that Joey thing!
[Scene: Mr. Zelners Office, hes in a meeting as Joey bursts in.]
Joey: Do you think you can just buy my friends baby?!
Joey: (entering) Hey!
Rachel: Hey! Oh Joey, honey listen, thank you for talking to my yesterday about that thing with my boss. That really meant a lot.
Joey: Not a problem. Oh, and just so you know, that guys not going to be bothering you about that baby thing anymore.
Joey: Lets just say I took care of it.
Joey: Dont worry! Dont worry. I just told him, very nicely, "You dont go buying peoples babies, so back off!!"
Rachel: No! No, no-no-no Joey he doesnt want to buy my baby! I made that up!
Joey: What?! Why?!
Joey: And you couldnt think of anything else?!
Rachel: (To Joey) I cant believe that you yelled at my boss! Im-Im gonna lose my job! What am I going to do?!
Rachel: Oh Joey, I cant believe you brought my boss into this! Im gonna get fired!
Joey: You lied to me!
Rachel: Well, she told me too! (Points to Monica and Joey glares at her.)
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Chandler is watching Joey pace nervously as Rachel enters.]
Joey: So? What-what-what happened?
Rachel: Joey, Im really sorry that I lied to you. I was just trying to make things
Joey: I know. I know.
Joey: Hey youre right. Yeah, its kinda been like us again a little bit.
Joey: Me too. I mean I havent thought at all about how I put myself out there and said all that stuff and how you didnt feel the same way about me and-and how it was really awkward.
Kristen: Well uh, Ross? This is Joey. Joey? Ross.
Joey: In the dream I did enjoy the closeness.
Joey: Hi!
Joey: (on tv) Oh, you said it Mike. (rips open the carton and spills milk on the counter) Aw! There's got to be a better way!
MONICA: Joey, you know, maybe your just not used to kissing men, maybe you just tensed up a little, maybe that's what you need to work on.
Chandler: Whoa-whoa-whoa! You broke Joeys chair?
Joey: How do you figure?
[Scene: Joey and Rachels, Joey is sitting behind a red drum set.]
Joey: So, there was no miracle?!
Joey: Your chair?!
Chandler: Joey you broke my chair!!
Joey: Sure! I would love to wait with you guys! Thanks! (Sits down.)
Joey: Thats right!
Joey: Yeah! We are!
Chandler: So Joey breaks my chair and I get nothing!
(Rachel whispers in Joeys ear.)
Joey: Chandler! I don't need luck. I have thought this through!
Dina: Joey, I am scared to death about this. But I really think I can do it, Im just gonna need some help. And Bobbys gonna be here the whole time.
Ross: So Joey umm, you look familiar. Are uh, are you on TV or something?
Joey: Oh, Oh, you're right! I don't want that. I can't date her!
Joey: Oh yeah.
Joey: Oh No-no-no-no-no-no-no! He went over to Ross' to bring the dog back here!
Joey: Ahhh (To Rachel) Eh?
Joey: Hey!
Joey: Well I dont like to say it out loud, but, yeah! Dont feel bad man, we all have our strengths. Youre better with numbers and stuff.
Joey: They do!
Kristen: Well Joey doesnt like to talk about it but, hes one of the stars of Days Of Our Lives.
Joey: Come on Rach! Look, turning thirty is not that big a deal.
JOEY: That's it, just hey. Like at the end of a dance, HEY! [she starts nibbling his hand] Hey. He-hey.
Joey: I'm sorry! (He stands up) This never happened to me before! I'm an expert at taking off bras! I can do it with one hand! I can do it with my eyes closed! One time I just looked at one, and it popped open! I blame your bra!
Joey: Yeah, youre roommate is a soap opera star.
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, continued from earlier.]
Joey: A woman in a mans body.
The Director: (entering, drunk) I am hurt! (to Joey and Kate) A plague on both your houses! (walks away)
Ross and Joey: No-no-no-no-no. (They start to turn away, but Phoebe stops them, and turns them back to face her.)
Joey: How could this happen to me?! Yesterday I had two TV shows! Today, I got nothin!
Joey: So yknow Ross its funny cause, you look familiar to me too. Have you ever been married?
Joey: Yeah, but uh, I dont want to be up too late, so uh, Ill have a decaf.
Chandler: (To Joey) Would you put that back on?! Monicas gonna be here any minute!
Joey: But it hurts my Joeys Apple.
(Joey walks away and Mr. and Mrs. Geller walk up. Mr. Geller is wearing this ancient velvet tuxedo.)
(Phoebe turns and looks at Monica, while Joey frantically motions to Chandler to help him out.)
Joey: Well actually
Woman: (To Joey) Is this yours?
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Joey is showing off the entertainment center.]
Joey: Thanks, Rach. Look, you guys are just terrific. Yknow? Now, how about clearing out of here so I can get some new customers. Its all about turnover.
Joey: Yep. (Starts for Monicas room, but Chandler stops him.)
JOEY: Aww, Rach, I think you look cute (kisses her on the cheek, then looks at Ross) And you, uh, you, you I could eat with a spoon (goes to kiss him).
Joey: Now that youre a couple, we dont get two presents from you guys?
Joey: So youve just married the one time then?
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey, Monica, Ross, and Chandler are watching Phoebe polish the daisies on her bike outside.]
Rachel: Ooh... oooh... (pause) (Rachel is all bah-jiggity about Joey) oh, ah... (pause) (to Monica) Can I ask you a question?
Joey: Oh-ho-kay, Im talking to the king. (starts to go to a back room)
Joey: Uh-huh look, the only reason I can over here was to settle things between us! Okay? Youve done a lot for me and my career, I wanted to pay you back so I took you to the premiere but you missed it! Okay, so how much do I owe you?
Joey: Ah. Hm. (To Kathy) Wanna go to bed?
Joey: Will you quit hoggin it!
[Scene: Central Perk, everyone except Phoebe and Joey are there.]
Rachel: Joey! It is an auction! You dont guess, you buy!
Joey: Yeah!!
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Rachel and Tag are making out on the couch.]
Phoebe: (To Joey) Okay quick, help me get this off! (Motions to her top.)
Joey: Like what?
Joey: Monicas chicken parm! Ill take care of it. (He picks up the phone) Hey Mr. Treeger, its Joey Tribbiani. Listen, I need to get into Monica and Chandlers apartment. Its an emergency. (Listens) Uhh, gas leak! Yeah oh, and bring garlic bread. (Hangs up.)
Joey: Oh, I dont know Pheebs. Itll be okay.
Ross: Yes. And another time after that. Boy Im getting hungry! Hey Joey, have you ever been so hungry on a date that when a girl goes to the bathroom you eat some of her food?
[Cut outside, Joey is catching up with Phoebe.]
(Joey starts to walk away, but stops.)
Rachel: Hey Joey, can I
Joey: Okay! (Runs off downstairs.)
Joey: Yes!
Joey: Oh, come on Rach! My turn just started!
Joey: Oh. Okay. Hey, can I ride this outside?
Phoebe: No, no, no! Don't call her! You wait for her to call you (Joey considers it)
Joey: (laughs that one off) Yeah. So uh Ross, well nowwhy did that first marriage breakup? Was it because the woman was straight or she was a lesbian?
Joey: No.
Joey: (entering, excited) Hey!
Joey: Nice.
Joey: And-and-and not only that, Im gettin a new brain!!
Joey: Dude, you soooo need this car.
Joey: Uh Cecilia Monroe, she plays Jessica Lockhart.
Rachel: Okay, come onJoey, Ill buy you a new one! All right? Well go down to the store right now and well-well get you a new chair.
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Phoebe is pouring Rachel some coffee.]
Joey: (quietly) My chair heels itself.
(Phoebe throws another jab, and lands it on Joeys nose, causing it to bleed.)
Joey: Say what?
Joey: Umm
Joey: Oh uh, one of the writers.
Joey: Oh anyway, I just wanted to say how wonderful I think you are.
Joey: (quickly) I dont know. Why? Did you hear something?
Joey: No. It just seems like Ross is the kind of a guy that would marry a woman on the verge of being a lesbian and then push her over the edge.
Joey: Okay.
Joey: (whispers to Phoebe and Rachel) Hey, thank you so much. (They both exit.)
Joey and Ross: No. No.
Joey: (watching the discussion) Hey Chandler, do we know that lady?
Joey: (interrupting) Was his name Angus? (Monica and Chandler laugh.)
[Phoebe slams on the breaks. Joey and Rachel are thrown forward into the pillows in their laps.]
Joey: Im so sorry. Look, if it was up to me you would never leave the show.
Joey: See you in 2003. (She walks away.)
Joey: Joey.
(She turns her head away and when shes not looking, Phoebe shakes her head and mouths, "No, Im not." Both Joey and Ross smile, look at each other, and then stop smiling.)