words in movies
Chandler: I figured Id buy those. Pat, Id like to buy a vow. (Laughs)
(Ross laughs.)
Monica: Oh, and I can also speak a little French. Voulez-vous coucher avec moi ce soir? (Mischa laughs) Why? What did I say?
Chandler: (laughs) Oh thats great, my friend Joeys in the movie business.
Joey: Yes, but in Drake Remorays body. (Ross laughs unbelievably.) Why is this so hard for you to get? I thought you were a scientist!
(Everyone laughs.)
(Monica laughs and snorts.)
Monica: (laughs) Well thats the best part. Umm, you guys get to decide!
(Chandler laughs)
Joey: Ah, yes, The Plan! (Laughs loudly again, but he sounds more like Santa Claus.)
Rachel: Yeah, I did, but y'know what? I am really, really trying to cut back, y'know? (Laughs) Good luck, Rach.
Ross: Oh-oh yeah, you-you came up to me and asked if I could do you a favor, and my Uncle Murray came up to you and handed you a check. And then you said, "Why do they call it a check? Why not a Yugoslavian?" (Chandler laughs.) Yeah, then you did that.
Rachel: (laughs) Oh, I'm sure gonna miss pretending to laugh at your weird jokes that I don't get.
Monica: Just go up to her and ask her out. (Chandler laughs) Oh, what's the worst thing that could happen?
Rachel: Uh well, I guess Im not gonna miss the fact that youre never allowed to move the phone pen. (Laughs. Monica lags behind the laugh a little bit.)
[Joey just laughs as a third set of flashbacks featuring Chandlers mistakes starts. The first flashback is from The One With The Prom Video. It's Chandler telling Phoebe how much he hates the bracelet Joey bought him. They're both at Central Perk.]
(Everybody laughs.)
Ross: No, but, it's, you know, it's just a funny image, you know, the two of you, in this restaurant, with... (laughs nervously)tzz-zzz, mmm.
Chandler: I was dangerously dehydrated during the first six months of our relationship. (Monica laughs.) Look, for me the rush is knowing that we are gonna be together for the rest of our lives.
Monica: I can't believe we are at a real college party! (Rachel laughs excitedly) I have to pee so bad!
(Phoebe, Joey and Ross laughs)
(Joey and Ross laughs)
RACHEL: Oh well, well thank you.� (She laughs.� He stares for a moment.)� Okay, stop.� Stop looking at me like that.� The last time that happened, (points to Ross) that happened.� (points to Emma.)
(Phoebe, Joey and Ross laughs again)
(Ross and Chandler laughs)
(Joey and Chandler laughs)
Rachel: (laughs) You know what?
Monica: Now you think I wouldn't enjoy that, because it is so fake, (Laughs) but I still do.
Chandler: Okay, well Im gonna get Ross, get the cameras, and get them developed. (Joey laughs again.) 32 Joe. Youre 32! (Exits)
(Joey and Ross laughs)
(Rachel laughs.)
(Hayley laughs and goes into the kitchen thinking it's a joke, Joey doesn't see what's so funny about it)
Earl: (To All) Did you hear that?! I dont need you guys to care about me! Because the universe cares! The whole universe! (Laughs as everyone ignores him.) (To Phoebe) I really wished theyd care just a little bit though.
Janice: Hi, Ross. Yes, it's me. How did you know? (she laughs obnoxiously)
[Chandler, trying to make nice with Jack, laughs at his joke and points at Jack.]
Joey: I know, yeah. I feel like we're all growing up. Person named Wiener, God that kills me. (Laughs)
Chandler: Id like to toast, Ross and Emily. Of course, my big toast will be tomorrow at the wedding, so this is kind of my little toast or Melba toast, if you will. (No one in the room laughs. He starts to get flustered.) Okay. I known Ross for a long time. In fact, I knew him when he was going out with his first girlfriend. (Ross looks embarrassed.) And I thought things were going to work out for him..Until the day he over inflated her. (He laughs. Jack looks at Judy and no one in the room laughs.) Ohh, Dear God.. (A cellular phone rings.)
Rachel: (reading the note) "Pheebs, cant make it, got a date. Talk to you later. Big Daddy." (Laughs) Big Daddy?
JOEY: Good, otherwise my watch would fall off. [laughs hysterically]
[Everyone laughs]
Rachel: (laughs) Well, I mean, are you sure you want to go out with her? I mean that aint a pretty picture in the morning, yknow what I mean. That wig all in disarray, and boobs flung over the night stand, y'know.
(She laughs at the childhood memory. Phoebe smiles at being able to make her point.)
Richard: Oh, (laughs) that was the blind date that I told you about, she called and switched it to today.
Mona: Huh, could you imagine. I go away for a few days, and come back, and my boyfriend is living with some woman he got pregnant! (Mona laughs yes again!)
Monica: I might've said that. (Chandler laughs.) Why is that funny?
Ross: I like it. I do, I think it's a Ten. (Chandler laughs.)
Rachel: (reading what he wrote again) "Dear Rach, youre a great person. Sorry about your tiney-wienie." (Will laughs.)
Ross: Okay. (He leans in to kiss her again, but she leans back preventing him from making contact.) Wow, its-its 5:30 in the morning. (Rachel laughs) So, Id better get cracking on this baby.
Ross: Its a good thing I didnt do it, because it sounds like it wouldve been a very expensive wedding. (Rachel laughs) Okay, good night
Ross: (on the phone) Yes, hello. I have a question. Umm, I used your pen to draw on my friend's face. (Listens) A beard and a moustache. (Listens and laughs) Thank you. (Rachel turns around and glares at him.) No, she didn't think so. (Listens) I know it's like (turns and sees Rachel staring at him and quickly changes the subject) anyway, umm well make-up didn't cover it and we've tried everything to get it off and nothing's worked. What-what do we do? (Listens) Yeah. (Listens) Uh-huh. (Listens) Yeah. (Listens) Oh! Okay. (Listens) Okay, thank you! (Rachel gets excited at his tone.) (Hangs up the phone) Yeah, it's not coming off.
The Casting Director: Terrific! Well uh, theres one more thing. Uhh, uh its really important to the director that everything in this movie is authentic. Yeah and so in your love scene with Sarah she talks about how shes never seen a naked man who wasnt Jewish. So (Laughs.)
Chandler: Oh, shes got you running errands, yknow, picking up wedding dresses (Laughs and makes like Indiana Jones and his whip) Wah-pah!
Phoebe: Oh well y'know. (laughs)
Phoebe: Okay, oh and you know, if she gets upset, just scratch her tummy and give her a liver snout. (laughs and hangs up the phone)
Rachel: (laughs and pushes the chair back in) Yeah, well, y'know umm No honey, listen I think it's a great idea to become friends with someone before you date them, but I think the way you do it is y'know you meet someone, become their friend, build a foundation, then you ask them out on a date. Don't hit on your existing friends!
Rachel: Oh! (laughs) Thats fine.
Monica: Oh. (she laughs)
Mrs. Geller: (laughs) Im not freaking out.
Chandler: (laughs) No. No!
The Salesman: (laughs) You need these books.
Rachel: (laughs) You ah, you didnt say Yes to that did you?
Kathy: (laughs) Oh-oh-oh-oh!
Phoebe: (laughs) Okay, quit down. (they start to kiss again)
Chandler: (laughs) Right in there!
Kathy: (laughs) What about the duck?
[Scene: Rosss bedroom, Rachel getting into bed while Ross is reading and laughs.]
Emily: (laughs) Well, I should hope not. Ross knows better than that by now.
(Rachel laughs hysterically for no reason.)
Chandler: Gotcha! (laughs)
Chandler: so then the farmer says, "Thats not a cow and youre not milking it." (Everyone laughs.)
Chandler: Oh that's so cool! Why would a cop come in here though? They don't serve donuts. (No one laughs.) Y'know what actually, could you discover the badge again? I think I can come up with something better than that.
Monica: (laughs) Please, its a relief is what it is, is what it is.
(Chandler laughs without opening his mouth.)
Chandler: (laughs) No you cant.
Joey: Ross! (Laughs) Theyre gonna kill you!
Chandler: (laughs) Okay, we have to talk. Im just getting out of a very serious relationship
Emily: (laughs) Ross play rugby? I dont think so.
Rachel: Well, they never have any paper in there y'know. So my rule is no tissue, no tuschy. (Phoebe laughs and gets out.) Well, if everybodys going. (She gets out and starts to close the door.)
Rachel: (laughs) Yeah, okay, at ease solider!
(Rachel laughs hysterically.)
Phoebe: (laughs and picks up another lure) And this?
Ross: Okay here, have one of these peppers. Oh ha Oh God! So so hot! (Rubs his eyes.) Oh my(Laughs.) By the way, you dont want to touch the pepper and then touch your eye.
Ross: (laughs) Move in with me.
Joey: (Laughs) Of course we do! Mike is playing a game that we used to play in high school. Yeah, where we pretend we don't know each other. We played all kinds of games. (To Mike) Hey, remember the one where I punch you in the face for not being cool?!
Phoebe: So you do know who he is! (laughs, Ross stares at her) Sorry.
Monica: (laughs) Okay.
Joey: (laughs) Actually, I didnt know the magazine was paying for it. Wouldnt have mattered, Im doing this for the fans, not for the free food.
Rachel: (laughs) Oh my God! Oh, thats funny, I cant believe I did that.
Frank: (laughs) Not to me.
Phoebe: (laughs) All I could think of was yknow, "Is he gonna kiss me? Is he gonna kiss me?"
Phoebe: (laughs) Thank you.
Monica: (laughs) Yes, I did! And you are welcome!
Ross: (laughs) That uh, that was pretty funny. Wasnt it?
(She laughs and opens the door to reveal Rachel sitting on the bed.)
Monica: (laughs) Thats okay.
Joey: No! No. Umm, just myself and if they dont like me for(Laughs.) Im sorry I couldnt even get through that.
Ross: I thought I heard voices! Hi Charlie! (Kisses her.) Hi Joey. (Hugs him.) And.. Oh! You're gonna have to introduce me to your new girlfriend. (Laughs.) I'm just kidding, I know Rachel, I know. (He squeezes her hand.) Come, please come in. Come in.
Rachel: (laughs) I'm sorry, that's not funny.
Ross: (laughs as well, but for a different reason) Yeah, I didnt think of that.
(She laughs.)
Emily: Oh, Liam. (Ross laughs and takes her back.)
Chandler: Oh. (takes the cassette and puts it on his arm like the stop smoking patch, and it falls off.) Nope, that patch is no good. (Joey and Monica both do their fake laughs.)