words in movies
[Scene: An Emergency Room, Rachel and Monica enter. Rachel is limping and leaning on Monica for support.]
Monica: Hi. Uh, my friend here was taking down our Christmas lights, and and she fell off the balcony and may have broken her foot or or ankle or something.
(Rachel glares at the nurse, who gives Monica a form attached to a clipboard.)
(Monica helps Rachel over to a vacant seat.)
(Monica starts on the form, while Rachel catches her breath and massages her ankle.)
Monica: Okay, ooh, alright. Name, address... Okay, in case of emergency, call?
Monica: Really?
Monica: Oh, that is so sweet. (Touched, she puts an arm around her friend and kisses her.) Oh gosh, love you. Insurance?
Monica: (No longer touched) you don't have insurance?
Monica: I have no idea, but X-rays alone could be a couple hundred dollars.
Monica: Well there's not much we can do.
Monica: Hah, no no no no no no no no no no.
Monica: (Looking around to check that no-one's listening, then lowering her voice anyway) That's insurance fraud.
Monica: (Jumping up to make Rachel sit down) Okay, okay. I hate this.
Monica: (to the nurse) Hi, (tiny laugh) um, I'm gonna need a new set of (tiny laugh) these forms (tiny laugh).
Monica: (Tiny laugh) I am really an idiot. (Tiny laugh) you see, I was filling out my friend's form, and instead of putting her information, (tiny laugh) I put mine.
Monica: (Tiny laugh) yep, that's me, (tiny laugh) I am that stupid (tiny laugh).
[Scene: The Hospital, Monica and Rachel are waiting for the doctors to arrive. They enter and are played by Noah Wyle and George Clooney.]
Dr. Mitchell: Okay, errrr, Monica?
Monica: Yes? (jumping as Rachel punches her arm) ..yes, she is.
Rachel (as Monica): Hi, this is my friend Rachel.
Monica (as Rachel): Hi.
(Monica and Rachel smile back prettily.)
Monica (as Rachel): Thank you.
Rachel (as Monica): Right.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, everyone but Joey is waiting for Phoebe to arrive for her surprise birthday party. Rachel and Monica is telling Chandler about Rachel's incident.]
Monica: Uh, you left out the stupid part.
Monica: I think it's totally insane, I mean, they work for the hospital. It's like returning to the scene of the crime. You know, I say we blow off the dates.
Rachel: What? Monica, they are cute, they are doctors, (spelling it out in the air for her slow friend) cute doctors, doctors who are cute!
(There is a knock at the door. Someone turns the music off, then the whole party runs and hides, except for Monica and Rachel who answer their door. Ross stands in the doorway, holding a box, but everyone is too keyed up to notice that it's him.)
Monica: Come on, she'll be here any minute.
Monica: Oh...
Monica: Well maybe we can make a, a, a 'B' out of one of those roses.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica is just getting off of the intercom and turns off the TV which is still in the SAP mode.]
Monica: Rachel, the cute doctors are here.
(Monica opens the door for Dr. Mitchell and Dr. Geoffrey.)
Monica: Hi, come on in.
Monica: Hi, Geoffrey.
Dr. Rosen: So, Monica, how's the ankle?
Monica: It's uh...
Monica (as Rachel): ..well, why don't you tell them? After all it, is your ankle.
Rachel (as Monica): You know what, it's feeling a lot better, thank you, um... Well, listen, why don't you two sit down and, and we'll get you some glasses... okay... (They don't know what to do with their coats and Monica points to the living room) STAT!
(Rachel joins Monica who is in the kitchen area, opening the wine bottle. Rachel checks that the doctors aren't listening, then lowers her voice anyway.)
Monica: It will not be fine. We'll get in trouble.
Rachel: Oh, Monica! Would you stop being such a wuss?
Monica: A wuss? Excuse me for living in the real world, okay?
Monica: I said we are not going to do it, okay? Sometimes you can be such a, a big baby.
Monica: Sure, every time, you're such a princess...
Monica: What?
Monica: What!?
Monica: (getting angry) What!!?
(Rachel brightly limps back across the apartment with glasses of wine for the cute doctors, leaving an open-mouthed Monica in her wake.)
Rachel: (as Monica) Thanks! I've been here about six years, and Rachel moved in a few months ago.
Monica: (as Rachel) Yeah... (joining the others) ..see, I was supposed to get married, but, um, I left the guy at the altar.
Monica: (as Rachel) Yeah... Yeah, I know it's pretty selfish, but haha, hey, that's me. (Indicating a dish on the table) Why don't you try the hummus?
Dr. Rosen: So, Monica, what do you do?
Rachel: (as Monica) Aahh, I'm a... chef at a restaurant uptown.
Rachel: (as Monica) Yeah it is, mostly because I get to boss people around, which I just love to do.
Monica: (as Rachel) (Suddenly laughing) Oh, god, I am so spoiled... That's it!
Rachel: (as Monica) And by the way, have I mentioned that back in high school, I was a cow?
Monica: (as Rachel) I used to wet my bed.
Rachel: (as Monica) I use my breasts to get other people's attention.
Monica: (as Rachel) (Revealing her anger to point at her best friend) We both do that!
Dr. Mitchell: (on the phone) Monica and Rachel's apartment. Err yeh, aayah, yeh, just one second... (handing it to Monica) ..ah, Rachel, it's your dad.
Monica: (as Rachel) Hi, Dad. No, no, it's me. (Getting up to move further away from Rachel) li-listen, Dad, I can't talk right now, um, but there's something, um... there's something that I've been meaning to tell you...
(Monica glares triumphantly across the room, scaring Rachel who also stands up.)
Monica: (as Rachel) Remember back in freshman year? (Talking fast before Rachel can catch her) Well, Billy Dreskin and I had sex on your bed.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, the next morning, Ross, Phoebe, Chandler and Monica sit round the coffee table, playing Scrabble. Rachel, still in her dressing gown, is pleading on the phone, her free hand shaking with agitation.]
Rachel: (on phone) Daddy... Daddy... Daddy, why whyyy would I sleep with Billy Dreskin? His father tried to put you out of business! (Rachel turns to Monica, clasping the receiver to her bosom so Dr.Green can't hear, while mouthing "You are...") ...dead!
(Monica smiles a sweet apology of regret, until she's distracted by Marcel as he clambers all over her nice furniture.)
Monica: Ross, he's got the remote again.
Rachel and Monica: Oh god, waddawe do, waddawe do, waddawe do?
Monica: I don't know! Why don't you just explain? What do they want? Find out what they want!
Monica: (taking the phone) Hello, this is Monica... Yeah??? Oh... (Smiles at Rachel to reassure her) Okay, yes, we'll be right, we'll be right down.(Listens) Thank you. (Hangs up)
Monica: We forgot to sign one of the admissions forms.
Monica: Thank you.
Monica: Yes.
Monica: Hi.
[Scene: The Emergency Room. The officious admissions nurse is again on duty. Rachel and Monica enter, looking worried. As they approach the desk, Rachel adopts a winning smile, while Monica struggles to smile at all.]
Rachel: (as Monica) Hi, remember us?
Monica: (as Rachel) Um, okay. You just called a little while ago about needing a signature on the admissions form. Well, it turns out we need a whole new one (little laugh) because uh, you see, I-I, I put the wrong name again. (Little laugh) 'cause um...
Monica: (as Rachel) I am. I'm that stupid. (Little laugh.)
Rachel: (as Monica) Yeah, and and, I'm just gonna pay for this with a check.
Rachel: (as Monica) Yeah, I know... (mirroring her friend) ..I'm I'm just not that bright either.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Chandler is neglecting the game of Scrabble, for he's busily drawing on his own childhood in an attempt to help Ross. Marcel chitters about.]
[Scene: The Emergency Room, Monica sits with Rachel, who is filling out an honest form at last. Ross and Chandler hurtle in. Little Marcel, wrapped in a fluffy towel, is cradled in Ross's arms. They dash up to the admissions desk. Ross is frantic.]
(Hearing her brother's voice, Monica gets up to stand behind Chandler, followed by Rachel.)
Monica: What's goin' on?
(..then turn back to the desk when the surprise hits them, and Ross and Chandler whip around once more. Monica and Rachel recoil slightly.)
(Rachel, Monica, Ross and Chandler whip around for a second time, in formation.)
Rachel and Monica: Oh, thank you.
Monica: Michael.
Monica: (as Rachel) Monica.
Rachel: (as Monica) Oh.
Monica: (as Rachel) Hi.
Rachel: (as Monica) Hi.
(Monica smiles to cover her embarrassment, but Rachel sadly looks away...)
[Scene: The Hospital, Marcel lies on the operating table while recovering from the anaesthetic, tucked up under a sheet like an infant in a huge bed. Ross sits beside him, as a smiling Chandler, Monica and Rachel look on.]
Monica: Oh, look, he's waking up!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, everyone except Joey is there. Rachel is looking out of the window and Ross is handing out some Chinese takeout. There's a small SAP in the corner of the screen.]
Monica: �A qui�n pidio el pollo General Tso? (Who ordered General Sal's chicken?)
Monica: Mira, Ross, Marcel se llevo el control remoto. (Look, Ross, Marcel's got the remote.)
Monica: Okay, I just don't get why you like it so much.
Monica: Chandler, please, come on. Look at him. (Pointing to a picture of Ralph on a magazine,.)
Monica: Honey, we dont really have to go to this thing tonight do we?
Monica: You know what? I take back what I said before. You keep playing at the restaurant, because with your music driving people inside, my bar sales are going up like crazy.
Phoebe: Oh, okay! (reading) "Would I go back to Allesandros? Sure, but Id have to order two meals, one for me and one for the guy pointing the gun to my head." (to Monica) Wow! You really laid into this place.
Monica: Nothing, um, it's just, um... It's Roger.
Monica: All right, I'll see you guys later. (raises)
Monica: Thank you.
Monica: Ill get it.
Ross: LookOkay, Im just gonnaIm gonna have to go find him and bring him back! Okay? You-you make sure Monica does not find out, okay?
Monica: Heres the plan! Okay? Im going to leave you get a look at Brendas bra!
Monica: Well. Sounds like you're writing yourself a little play there Rach. Wow! Let me know how that one turns out.
Monica: Oh. Hi, Mr.Heckles.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Monica answers the door and lets her parents in. They are carrying boxes.]
[Cut back to the living room. Chandler slowly exits the bathroom and gets pushed from behind by Monica and sees Phoebe closing the apartment door.]
(Both Monica and Rachel laugh.)
Joey: So Monica, still going out with Dr. Boring huh?
Monica: Come on Rach, come on. Lets see whats it like to be on a winning team for a change.
[Scene: The hallway between the apartments, they are taking Phoebe to the hospital but Chandler and Monica hold back.]
Monica: Oh, that's Nana, right there in the middle. (Reads the back) 'Me and the gang at Java Joe's'.
Rachel: "Im Monica, I dont get phone messages from interesting people. Ever!"
Monica: Come here. (He does, and they kiss.) Okay, be right back.
(She takes the pencil out of Monica's coffee and Monica puts her cup down in disgust.)
Chandler: Monica, I was wondering if you can make me some of that righteous mac and cheese like last year.
Monica: What are you guys doing here?
Monica: Because theyll know weve been listening.
Monica: So whenever youre ready to apologize to me, I will forgive you. Good day! (Monica and Phoebe reenter the apartment and Monica closes the door on a stunned Mrs. Green.) I cant feel my legs!
Monica: Oh, I can't pass for 22?
Monica: Are you alright?
[Scene: Central Perk, Rachel is sitting at a table and Phoebe is on the couch. Chandler and Monica can be seen outside, shes lecturing him, and pushes him inside. He then nods to Rachel, and is obviously counting off the seconds in his head and then Monica makes a grand enterance.]
(Monica points the remote at her TV, and punches out a key combination from the book, but the dreaded SAP logo remains and Spanish still comes forth.)
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, scene continued from earlier. They both get up and move to the window.]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel folding and packing clothes in suitcases as Phoebe enters.]
(Phoebe joins Chandler on the couch as there is a knock on the door which Monica answers.)
Monica: How's it going?
Monica: Sure! If you're just gonna hang out as friends, then maybe I'll join ya. You know, I'm your friend (to Phoebe) and Mike's friend (Mike is sceptical).
Monica: He's a dropper!
Monica: I am 26.
Monica: Burning's good.
Monica: Wow! That Mike thing was interesting! I don't know what's gonna happen with Phoebe and David.
Monica: Oh-my-god Rachel! (Rushing out to look over the edge) Rachel!
Monica: We all chipped in.
Rachel: And a nice hot cider for Monica. (Hands it to her.)
Mrs. Geller: (to Monica) Your grandmother would have hated this.
Monica: (to Rachel) Hey! Joey said no autographs! But if she's gettting one, then I want one too: To Monica. And none of this "best wishes" crap. I want "love".
Monica: Im tellingIf you put that in her apartment youll never hear the end of it.
(Brenda bends down to use the dustpan and Monica leans over to look for the stain, but leans so far over she falls out of the chair.)
[Scene: The New School, Monica, carrying her dish, and Joey are confronting the food critic.]
Monica: Im so glad you liked it.
Monica: Do this for me! Come on, I catch you looking at womans breasts all the time!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, time has passed. The five are sitting around the coffee table talking.]
[Scene: Monicas bedroom, Phoebe is trying to hide the bed from Monica.]
Monica: Oh, I didnt know you liked football.
Monica: Oh, I asked one of the waitresses at work if she'd help me out.
(Rachel goes into her room and Monica enters the living room as Ross is leaving.)
Monica: I know, but you have to open it today! (Hands it too him.)
(Monica and Rachel both cover their eyes)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Chandler and Ross are telling Joey, Rachel, and Monica of their bank woes.]
Monica: It's not ok to do it in a doctor's office but it is ok to do it in a parked car behind a Taco Bell?
Monica: Because they dont know were dating. (Again, trying to quickly change subjects.) Do you think we should eat in the kitchen? (Goes to the sink and the stove to cook.)
Rachel: Ohh Oh, honey here. Take it all. (Pours the entire large bowl into her bag and closes the door.) Monica! We need more candy?
Fat Monica: Oh gosh, listen if you and Chip do it tonight, promise me you'll tell me everything.
Monica: Yeah, you have to go fight for her!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Chandler is talking to Phoebe about trying to give Joey some money.]
Chandler: Come on Monica, its our Valentines Day. Please? Please-please, please?
Monica:: sweetie it's ok, I still love you, let me be a part of this.
Monica: Honey, you know I think you're hilarious! Come on, you know that joke you told me last week? The one about Jerry Lewis and the girl with the lazy eye...? (he laughs) That slayed me.
Chandler: Nobody is opening anything ok? Look, I dont know about you guys, but I wanna see the look on Monicas face when I give her my present, and Im sure she wants to see the look on my face when I get mine. So please, please, can we just, can we put them back?
Richard: And-and then I sneak out and before Monica can her parents come in.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel is on the couch still doing the crossword. Chandler is in the kitchen.]
Monica: (to Phoebe) Oh my God! Did you hear that? She hired me because she thinks Im good.
Monica: We didnt give you any money! (Chandler is motioning, "No!")
(Rachel slams shut her window and storms into the living room, where Joey and Monica are eating breakfast.)
Fake Monica: I'm not too bad. Fortunately, blue's my colour. How-how did you know I was here?
Chandler: (To Monica) Happy New Year!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica and Rachel are there. Monica is just finishing cleaning the windows.]
Monica: Is it better than the other salmon mousse?
Monica: But, you see, it's just... this night has to go just perfect, you know? And, well, Wendy's more of a... professional waitress.
Monica: Hi honey. We just got a wedding gift from Bob and Faye Bing; they dont like us do they? (They gave them a pok-a-dotted punch bowl.)
[Cut to Monica and Chandler's, Joey is talking to Monica and Chandler.]
Monica: Hey, guys.
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey, Chandler, Monica, and Phoebe are there. Joey is holding a deck of cards out to Chandler.]
MONICA: Ok, everybody, there's food and drinks on the table. Go across the hall.
Rachel: (to Monica): Really? (out loud): Sure, we have scones left! (to Monica): OK, read them to me.
Monica: What?
Monica: I cant believe mom and dad are selling the house!
MONICA: I've gotta get back in the game.
Monica: Hell no, we'll pay!
Monica: Well, you're... you're different funny... I mean, you're... you're more sarcastic a-a-and... well, he does... bits... and impressions... and... and limericks...
Phoebe: OK, Monica? I had another answer all ready.
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Phoebe, Monica, and Chandler are eating breakfast as Joey enters.]
Monica: Ugly Naked Guy's laying kitchen tile. Eww!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel, Monica, and Phoebe are there.]
Monica: Lots of responses.
Monica: What?
Monica: Oh, Rachel!
Monica: (Runs out to the hallway) Chandler, wait. It goes: Old job, (Raises her hand) new job, (Raises her hand really high) you. This is just something I have to do.
Monica: You're kidding! Where? Where?
Monica: What?
Monica: Please! I am not as bad as Ross.