words in movies
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Joey and Chandler are getting ready for the flight to London and Monica comes running in.]
Monica: Guys, hurry up! The flight leaves in four hours! It could take time to get a taxi! There could be traffic! The plane could leave early! When we get to London, there could be a line at customs! Come on!! (She runs back to her apartment.)
Chandler: Six-hour trip to London. Thats a lot of Monica.
[Cut to the girls apartment, Monica is putting things into her purse as Phoebe and Rachel watch.]
Monica: Passport, check! (As she puts away each item, she says check.) Camera, check! Travellers cheques, check!
Monica: Myself. Yknow for remembering to pack a thing. Yeah, you do a good thing, you get a check! (pause) My mom does it, I never realized it was weird.
Monica: Hey!
Monica: Yep! You got the tickets?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, continued from earlier, Monica is telling Phoebe where everything is.]
Monica: Okay, if you need the vacuum, its in my closet on the left-hand side. Ah, the garbage bags are next to the refrigerator
Monica: Yeah, okay, give that a try!
Monica: All right, yknow what? We really are late! Lets go! Lets go! Lets go!!
[Scene: Another street, somewhere along the River Themes, Ross, Emily, and Monica are walking to where theyre gonna get married. Emily is relating the troubles with the caterer.]
Monica: Chicken Kiev?
Monica: Yeah, yknow, but something like salmon which would be so much more elegant than the chicken. And, you wouldnt have to worry about the salmonella. (Ross pushes her.) So, I cant wait to see this place youre getting married!
Monica: Its nice.
Monica: (entering) Okay, I talked to the guy with the shovel and I found out what happened.
Monica: They torn it down a few days early.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Phoebe is trying to move off of the couch as Rachel enters.]
Phoebe: Well, because we thought you knew!! Its so obvious! God, that would be like telling Monica, "Hey, you like things clean."
Emily: No. But, Monica and I were talking, and-and I was so upset about the hall being knocked down, and she suggested that we put the wedding off for a bit.
Ross: Postpone it? Emily, do you think Monica realises how much our parents spent on this wedding? Do you my sisters teeny-tiny little brain comprehends that people took time out of their lives to fly thousands of miles to be here, huh? (He puts his pants on backwards.) This isnt right.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Phoebe is on the couch as Rachel returns carrying a bunch of shopping bags.]
Monica: (entering) Hey!
Monica: Oh my God!
Monica: Hey!
Monica: (laughs) Yes, I did! And you are welcome!
Monica: Umm
Monica: She said that?!
Monica: Why?!
Monica: Oh my God. Youre even dumber than I am!
Monica: Ross, how long have you been planning this wedding?
Monica: Emily has probably been planning it since she was five! Ever since the first time she took a pillowcase and hung it off the back of her head. Thats what we did! We dreamed about the perfect wedding, and the perfect place, with the perfect four-tiered wedding cake (Starting to cry), with the little people on top. (Ross gets thrown a box of Kleenex from the bathroom and he gives her one.) Thanks. But the most important part is that we had the perfect guy who understood just how important all that other stuff was.
Monica: Sometimes we were.
Monica: Okay.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, the phone rings and Phoebe answers it.]
[Scene: Ross and Emilys planned wedding place, Monica is dragging Emily in.]
Emily: Monica, why have you brought me here of all places?!
Monica: Youll see.
Monica: And the musicians, look, they can go over here (Points to a little alcove), okay? And the chairs can face this way (Points), and (Points to Ross) You go.
Monica: Ohh. And I dont even have a date.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel is in her bedroom.]
[Scene: Rehearsal dinner hall. Ross and Emily are standing in the reception area. Monica arrives with her parents.]
Monica: Hey.
Ross and Monica: Dad, dad. We got it!! We Got It!!!
Mrs. Geller: We know how expensive weddings can be, besides this may be the only wedding we get to throw (patting Monica on the shoulder.).
Monica: Ha ha, a joke thats funny in all countries.
Monica: (Looking nauseous from her parents kissing.) And Im going to go get drunk. (Gets up to get a drink.)
[Scene: The Rehearsal Dinner Hall. Chandler, Joey, Ross, Emily, Monica, and all the bridal party are seated at the table. Chandler gets up to make a toast.]
Phoebe: Oh, hi, Mrs. Waltham. I need to speak with ether one of the best men, or Rosss sister Monica.
[Scene: Later that evening at the rehearsal dinner. Chandler and Monica are sitting on a sofa. Chandler is covering his face in embarrassment because of the toast.]
Monica: I was laughing. (Patting him on the knee.)
Monica: Well I didnt want everyone to think I was stupid.
Monica: My mothers driving me crazy, but Ross is getting married. Im happy. (A drunken man approaches.) Im not going to let anything spoil that.
Monica: Well, thanks, we like him.
Drunk Man: My god!! You must have been a teenage when you had him. (Monica stares straight forward after the comment. Chandler tries to console her by patting her on the shoulder.)
(Chandlers trying to console Monica.)
Monica: Then why would he say it?
Monica: Oh, my mothers right. Im never going to get married.
Monica: Ohh, Please?! Im a single mom, with a thirty year old son!!
Monica: (Comes up for below the covers and looks concerned.) Do you think he knew I was here? (Chandler quickly looks at Monica not knowing what to say.)
[Scene: Chandlers hotel room. Chandler and Monica are lying in the bed together talking. Theres an awkward air between them. They are both clutching the covers in from of them.]
Monica: (In am uneasy voice.) Nope. (She chuckles uneasily.)
Monica: Yep, yep...You?
Monica: Well...Id better get going.
Monica: (Scoots towards the side of the bed.) Could you not look?
Joey: Have you seen Monica?
Chandler: (Very defensive.) Im not seeing Monica.
Joey: I know! Thats why we got to find Monica!! You know where she is?
[Scene: The church where Ross and Emily are to be married. Judy, Andrea, and Monica enter together.]
Monica: Well, I love it. I only hope my wedding looks this good.
Monica: (Angrily.) You can let some of them go by!(Judy and Andrea go to the front of the chapel. Joey approaches Monica.)
Joey: (Whispering.) Pisst, Monica. Alright, we really need to start looking out for Rachel. Ill cover the front door. You watch that big hole at the back of the building and I got Chandler covering Ross.
Monica: (Awkwardly.) Why would I care where Chandler is? You know uhh...You know sometimes I dont even like Chandler.
(Chandler escorts Monica down the aisle.)
Monica: Stupid.
Monica: What were we thinking?
Monica: Oh yeah. Definitely.
Monica: Hey.
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's apartment.]
Monica: Hey.
Monica: Hey!
Monica: No, we haven't seen her since this morning.
Monica: These are for Erica!
Monica: Honey.
[Scene: Chandler and Monica's apartment. Chandler and Monica are looking through some papers.]
Monica: I want you to meet someone really special. Phoebe, this is Erica. And this is the baby!
Monica: Joey. Erica, baby!
Monica: (entering with Erica and Chandler) Hey you guys.
Monica: Youre right. I mean Im sorry. Yeah, I shouldnt be laughing. I should be laying down papers for you! (Runs off laughing which gets Chandler laughing.)
Monica: Ohh, Im so glad. Thank you so much for staying so calm during this. I mean its really, its made me stay calm. (Chandler just looks at her.) I coulda been worse!
Chandler: Monica. Calm, self.
Monica: Everyone. Erica, baby!
Monica: (sees what he is doing) Chandler, stop! It is not going to pop open!
Monica: (angry) Ow, what are the chances!
Monica: (enjoying what she's seeing) How's it going?
Monica: (Chandler's laughing) Did someone drop the baton again?
Monica: What is with you?
Monica: How's that now?
Monica: Are you awake?
Erica: Well, if there is anything else you wanna know... (Monica and Chandler look at each other)
Monica: How?
(Time lapse. Chandler and Monica are in bed now)
Monica: Yeah, but maybe we're just over-reacting.
[Scene: The Craps Table, Monica is still on her roll, only this time Chandler's with her and she has a huge crowd of people around.]
(Cut to Monica holding up her shirt, revealing her bra. An actor stands beside her, holding a pen in his hand.)
Monica: Are you kidding? This is where they get out stains! Okay? This is like Disneyland for me. Im-Im gonna be over here watching the dance of the clean shirts. (She points to and walks over to the electric clothes rack they have.)
Monica: William Sonoma, fall catalog, Page 27.
Monica: But what if it is better than ours? Should we at least look?
Monica: That's mine!! Now, would you both please start acting like adults? And get me my cough drops!
Monica: So what! As long as hes not wearing a white dress and a veil I dont care.
Monica: How about you go put on your 007 tuxedo and Ill make you a nice martini.
Monica: Yeah, I changed them. I-I sent you a fax about it!
Monica: (smiling) No it's not.
Monica: The thing we never do.
Monica: Nope, she doesn't have to, I found out who the father is.
Monica: Yeah, you miss alot, when you're moo-ing.
Monica: (her hair bigger then before) I can't believe it's raining again! Oh, it's so unfair!!!
Monica: You were my Midnight Mystery Kisser?
Monica: No, not if their room has two beds!
Monica: No one wanted seconds, right?
[Scene: Central Perk. Phoebe, Monica and Chandler on their couch.]
Monica: And Dad, yknow that mailman that you got fired? He didnt steal your Playboys! Ross did!
Monica: I don't know who I'm happiest for...
Monica: All right. I know you're not happy about us moving, but you're the only one who hasn't seen the house.
Monica: What?! Are you kidding me?! You-you-you think were ready to have a baby now?!
Monica: See you guys later.
Monica: Joey, please come. It would mean so much to us.
Monica: I do not have baby fever!
Monica & Chandler: Mhum.
Monica: Phoebe!
Monica: You seriously changed your name to that?
Monica: Hey Pheebs.
[Scene: Central Perk. Chandler and Monica are there when Phoebe enters.]
Monica: Okay, so from now on we have to call you Princess Consuela?
Monica: Oh, I'm sorry, mrs Hannigan.
Monica: Oh God. I'm so sorry.
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Monica and Rachel are on the couch looking at the Playboy magazine. When they hear someone coming, Monica goes to hide it under the sofa cushions.]
Monica: No it's not!
Monica: Thank you for letting us see the house again.
Monica: Ah, so glad you decided to come.
Monica: Joey, we know that's you.
Monica: Okay fine! Fine! Then you know what, Ill just write about Phyllis! Hmm!
Monica: (she tastes what she has cooked) I don't get older. I just get better!
(Chandler gives Monica a footlong "eye dropper" with the turkey grease in it)
Monica: How about at a game, on the big screen?
Monica: Hey, where have you been?
Chandler and Monica: No!
Monica: Joey, now that you're okay with the house, do you wanna go see your room?
Monica: No.
Monica: I guess. Why? Who's she with?
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's apartment. Ross enters.]
Monica: Oh, sorry!
(The waitress lets her in as Monica is about to throw a lobster into a pot of boiling water (Although, she hasnt taken off the rubber bands that hold the claws, so she cant be that good of a chef). Anyway, guess who the Colonel is by the following phrase.)
Monica: Oh please! Yesterday on the subway? You couldn't stop staring at that woman with the big breasts the whole time.
Monica: I dont believe this! When someone asks you in for lemonade, and to you that means they wanna have sex?
Monica: Im sorry. Ive never had a maid before, is this not okay?
Gary: (looking at Monica.) Mm! Seems like I wouldve remembered you!
Monica: Good. (To Chandler) Uh honey, the Miami Vice soundtrack? Really?
Monica: How is that gonna happen?
Monica: It is going to be okay! (Mrs. Green glances over her shoulder and glares at Monica while she heads for the bathroom.) It was worth a shot.
Monica: That's terrible!
[Scene: Central Perk. Phoebe's reading a newspaper. Chandler and Monica walk in.]
Monica: Don't worry, after a while he'll tune it out.
Monica: Joey's gonna be *so* upset.
Monica: Seriously, you don't think we should tell him?
Monica: Well, because every time we do, you make jokes about swinging and scare them away.
Monica: What if he reads it in the paper?
Rachel: Oh, big glamour night. Me and Monica at Laundorama.
Monica: Damnit Phoebe! How did you even call him?
Monica: Thanks.
Erica: No, he's in prison. (More shocked looks from Monica and Chandler)
Monica: Love it!
Monica: Well Im not sure yet, but umm of the top of my head Im thinking double sided tape and some sort of luncheon meat.
Chandler (to Monica): Sure.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, the whole gang is there including Janice, theyre watching Happy Days.]
(Chandler and Monica are speechless).
Phoebe: I dont know! (frantically points at Monica)