words in movies
[Scene: Ross and Rachels, Monica, Phoebe, Joey and Chandler are waiting for Ross and Rachel to come home and Monica is looking at the sign Phoebe bought that says, "Its a Boy!"]
Monica: Ok, I dont wanna be negative so Ill say that most of the signs you bought are good.
Monica: (looking at Chandler sleeping with a balloon in his mouth) So sexy. (Waking him up.) Honey.
Monica: Honey why dont you go lie down.
Monica: Phoebe did the signs!
[Scene: Ross and Rachels, Phoebe, Monica, Ross, and Rachel are watching Emma sleep.]
Monica: Phoebe! But I could take one of those little feet and put it in a pita pocket.
Monica: Wow, hes really not letting this go, is he?
Monica: Breaks your heart doesnt it
[Scene: Ross and Rachels, Emma continues crying while Rachel, Monica and Phoebe try different methods to stop her crying.]
Monica: Alright heres something, it says to try holding the baby close to your body and then swing her rapidly from side to side.
Monica: It worked!
Monica: Umm, she Rach, not it, she.
Monica: Oh my god, I am losing my mind.
Monica: Try feeding her again.
Monica: I know, thats why I said again!
Monica: Hey.
Chandler: Monica can I talk to you outside for a minute?
(Phoebe and Rachel go to the back room and Emma continues to cry in the background while Chandler and Monica talk.)
Monica: Okay whats up
Monica: Oh yeah (smiles).
Monica: What? Who says that?
Monica: Whats going on?
Monica: Excuse me?
Monica: (stands up angry) Tulsa, Oklahoma!
Monica: Chandler, I dont even wanna see the musical Oklahoma!
Monica: Are you trying to tell me that were moving to Oklahoma, or that youre gay? All right, not that this matters, but did they at least offer you a huge raise?
Chandler: No, no, but they are going to lease us a Ford Focus. (Monicas not impressed.) Ill get out of it.
Monica: Thank you.
Monica: Oh she misunderstood, she thought she was moving to Tulsa.
Monica: About a week and a half.
Phoebe: Well alright, looks like you guys have got it under control so Im just gonna go. (She gets up and Rachel looks at her, upset, and Monica just stares.) No! Really? Misery really does love company. All right! (She sits back down.)
Monica: Rach, try holding her a different way.
Monica: Youre just new at this, itll get better, think about your first day at work. I mean, that couldnt have been easy but you figured that out.
Monica: Okay Ill take her, here. (Takes Emma)
Monica: (To Emma) Bouncy baby, Bouncy baby, Ooh baby baby, Ooh baby baby, Ooh baby baby. (Emma stops crying and falls asleep)
Monica: It worked! Ooh baby baby baby, ooh baby baby baby!
Monica: I cant believe it! Shes asleep! I got her to go to sleep! I have actual magical powers!
Phoebe: I can hear traffic and birds! I can hear the voices in my head again! (Monica looks at her strangely) Im kidding. (She smiles wickedly.)
Monica: Yes I did, Im Monica, Super Aunt
Monica: Yes I am!!
Monica: Say what?
Monica: (stands up to hand Emma back) Oh no no no no!
Monica: What?
Rachel: You know the book says that whenever shes sleeping I should be sleeping so (She gives Monica thumbs and goes to lay down)
Monica: Shhh! We just got her to go to sleep
Monica: No.
Monica: (loudly) What!?
Rachel: No its really okay Monica!
Monica: (comes running out the kitchen to the bedroom) Got it! Got it! Got it! Got it! Got it! Got it!
Monica: (Robin is speaking loudly again) I...
Monica: We are the hottest! Huh? No one is hotter than we are! You're the best.
Monica: What?
Monica: Okay, where is the Kat Stevens CD?
MONICA: All right. We're gonna go. It's not for another six hours. We're gonna go then.
Monica: Rachel, listen to your mother. She is very smart.
[Flashback to when Chandler was introduced to Monica in The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks.]
Monica: Wait a minute, just because he paid for your head shots youre gonna take him? Joey, I dont think youre comprehending just how slutty this dress is!
Monica: Yeah, can we go call them? Is it too soon to call? I wanna call.
Monica: Child-birth, its a natural thing! Its beautiful.
Monica: Oh, they're brochures from different adoption agencies.
Monica and Chandler's apartment
Monica: Would you let it go? It's not that big a deal.
(Rachel joins Monica who is in the kitchen area, opening the wine bottle. Rachel checks that the doctors aren't listening, then lowers her voice anyway.)
Monica: Its frightening.
Monica: Yknow what? Youre-youre right.
Monica: (laughs) Youre still so funny. Youre so funny. (To Phoebe) What do I do?
Monica: Really?
Phoebe: (To Monica) Wrap it up, wrap it up, wrap it up
Ross: (to Monica and Rachel) Its winter, they are fewer people on the street. (Rachel and Monica smile and nod, knowingly.)
Monica: Yeah? Im proud of me too.
Monica: All right, well why dont I go out with an ex-boyfriend and do Joey a favor?!
Monica: Okay, I got that. Ill escape over there. Ill come back over here. All right, come on Ms. Pac-Man. Its gotRight(She dies.) Well, youre just a little bitch, arent you?
Monica: (entering) Hey!
Monica: (reading) Oh dear God!
Monica: What about the rest of Manhattan?!
Joey: Yeah! Yeah Monica! You listen to me, okay? And Im not just saying this because Im your friend, Im sayin it cause its the truth. Youre food is abysmal!
Monica: Oh my God, this is horrible!
Monica: I just had the most amazing bath.
Monica: We said at the movies, but
Monica: Joey! (He returns) Now that youre here
Monica: Joey, you know you dont actually have one.
Monica: Hey Joey, come taste this.
Monica to Ross: Hi.
Ross to Monica: Hi.
Monica: No-no, I-I really dont want to talk about it! I dont! (To Rachel) Especially with you. (Goes into her room.)
Monica to Amy: So. Welcome. Is this your first time you're seeing Emma?
Monica: Well fine! I want to meet this chicken expert! Send the Colonel in!
Monica to Emma: Hey you.
Monica: (turning around and doing that, "I'm making out with someone," thing with her hands) Ooh, umm, oh Kathy! Kathy, I love you! Oh! (She turns around and sees Gunther staring at her and stops suddenly.)
Monica: I can.
Monica: Monica.
Monica: Okay. (Does so.)
Monica: (entering quickly) Shes a hooker! Shes a hooker! Shes a (Stops as she sees her.) Hi! Uh, we spoke on the phone. (Goes and shakes the hookers hand.)
Monica: Okay, I got my note cards. (To Chandler) Do you got the presents?
The Cooking Teacher: Monica, you go to the head of the class.
[Scene: The Hospital, it's a montage of Monica and Phoebe's visit to the hospital with My Guy playing in the background. It starts with Monica reading a newspaper to him.]
Monica: Im so humiliated!
Phoebe: Great! Umm (Monica closes the door again and Phoebe knocks again.)
Joey: (laughs) Now lets not get carried away. (He walks away as Monica comes over and hugs Chandler from behind.)
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Chandler and Phoebe are entering.]
[Cut to Monica and Ross leaving Joey and Chandlers hotel room in London. As they exit Joey and Chandler enter from the bathroom with both of their pants down around their ankles.]
Monica: Thats right.
The Cooking Teacher: Ah Monica, my star student.
(Chandler glares at her and she shrugs her shoulders. Monica serves again; and Kara returns it.)
Monica: Joey! Im so proud of you!
Monica: You do?
Monica: Is this the video of the baby being born? Sweetie, this is Phoebes. Why were you even watching it?
Monica: Oh, Im totally crazy, but you-you like the food?
Monica: Its the salts.
Monica: Yes, thank you so much. And again, were so sorry. We could not feel worse about it.
<Monica and Amy turn away and walk into the living room towards the secret closet>
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Chandler is poking his head in.]
Monica: Okay.
Ross: Monica told me you had a blind date.
Monica: No leg-chewing for us sir.
Monica: Do you guys know what happened to Chandlers barca lounger?
Monica: Are we gonna take a limo?
MONICA: Listen you guys, I don't mean to be a pain about this but, um, I've noticed that some of you are just placing them on. You wanna push the caps until you hear them click. [she demonstrates, Gunther starts to walk to the door] Gunther, where're you going?
Monica: Star in a movie.
Monica: Well, Im never gonna listen to you again, thats for sure! (Mimicking her.) "Yknow, harm can it do if you go and put your name down?"
Monica: Boy, do I have a surprise for you!
Monica: Oh look, the pool tables free. Rack em up. Ill be back in just a minute. Get ready for me to whip your butt.
Monica: Joey, what are you doing? You promised Phoebe you wouldnt eat meat until she has the babies!
Monica: Okay, how much?
Phoebe: No ones here! (Monica looks at her.) Oh damnit!
Monica: Okay.
Monica: Hey! Howd it go?
Monica: Shes in the bathroom.
Monica: Now stop it! Double or nothing that she has it by tomorrow!
Monica: Im actually with her on this one.
Monica: Well uh, Im trying to make something for Joey. Do you mind if I raid your fridge?
Monica: We have too! I mean what if Ross's hears that and then calls her back and then they get back together? Is that what you want? Ross back with that controlling, neurotic, crazy Emily? The Emily that wouldn't let him see you?
Monica: Hey!
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross and Rachel are there as Phoebe and Monica enter.]
Monica: Do it!
Ross: Monica!
Monica: What did the doctor say? Any news on when the baby will come?
Ross: Monica, what is the matter with you?
Monica: Oh, okay!
[Scene: Central Perk, Monica and Chandler are on the couch as Phoebe enters with Monicas soul mate.]
Monica: Well, I mean I guess there is no harm in putting my name down.
Monica: Doesnt it ever just freak you out that-that youre never gonna be with anybody new again?
Rachel: (looking up at the ceiling) God, Monica its on the ceiling.
[Scene: A Portrait Studio, Chandler and Monica are trying to take their engagement picture. Monica has a beautiful smile, while Chandler isnt.]
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler is on the couch as Monica joins him.]
Monica: Hello? (Listens) Uh-huh. (Listens) Uh-huh. (Listens) Okay. (Hangs up.) I guess we can bet one more time.
Monica: Two hundred.
Monica: Yeah. I think you have to draw him out. And then- when you do- he's a preppy animal.
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, time lapse, Ross is entering. Chandler and Monica are at the kitchen table. Rachel is on the couch reading.]