words in movies
COMMERCIAL VOICEOVER: Can't get the monkey off your back? Then put it in your mouth...
[A monkey jumps on the desk and hands the guy a beer. He opens the beer and is suddenly on the beach, in a hammock, with beautiful women all around.]
ROSS: I meant because the monkey in it reminds me of Marcel.
ROSS: Remember when sometimes he'd borrow your hat, and, and when you got it back there'd be little monkey raisins in it.
CHANDLER: You know I think he will be surprised, 'till he realizes he's a monkey, and uh, you know, isn't capable of that emotion.
[Scene: San Diego Zoo. Ross is at the Monkey cages.]
ROSS: Well, I uh, I can't seem to find the monkey I donated last year. He's a capuchan, answers to the name Marcel.
LIPSON: Yes, and come see the bird show at 4. The macaws wear hats. Well it's a lot cuter if your monkey hasn't just died.
[Scene: San Diege Zoo. Ross is still at the monkey cages. A janitor is sweeping.]
JANITOR: It's about your monkey. It's alive.
ROSS: Buddy, my monkey?
JANITOR: Oh, yeah, right. There was a break-in, few months back, inside job. Your monkey was taken.
ROSS: Oh my God. But the zoo told me that my monkey was dead.
ROSS: Buddy, my monkey, my monkey.
JANITOR: Your monkey found a new career, in the entertainment field. That's all I know.
ROSS: Check it out, he actually is the MonkeyShine monkey.
ROSS: This is so exciting, I haven't seen my monkey in almost a year.
ROSS: Uh, excuse me, uh, where can we find the monkey?
JOEY: Closed set. We know but we're friends with the monkey. [guard lets them in]
JOEY: You're blowin' me off for a monkey?
Woman No. 1: No. No, haven't seen a monkey. Do you know anything about fixing radiators?
Luisa: (Animal Control) Somebody called about a monkey?
(A monkey jumps on to his shoulder.)
Woman No. 1: Just a sec. (To Chandler and Joey) Hope you find your monkey. (She starts to shut the door)
Mr. Heckles: I don't have a monkey.
Joey: We can't, alright? (To the women) We're sorry. You have no idea how sorry, but... We promised we'd find this monkey. If you see him, he's about yea high and answers to the name Marcel, so if we could get some pictures of you, you'd really be helping us out.
Rachel: Ooooh, that's fine. We'll see who has the last laugh there, monkey boy.
Phoebe: Okay. Good-bye, little monkey guy. Alright, I wrote you this poem. Okay, but don't eat it 'till you get on the plane.
Joey: I dunno what to say, Ross. Uh, it's a monkey.
Ross: Well, I think it's perfect. Y'know, it's just gonna be the two of us, she spent all day taking care of my monkey...
Joey: A monkey.
Rachel: (Out of shot) Stop it! Marcel! Bad monkey!
Mr. Heckles: That's my monkey.
Ross: Alright, I want my monkey.
Ross: Okay, gimme my monkey back.
Ross: Oh, I just thought we could go out to dinner, and then maybe bring her back to my place and I'd introduce her to my monkey.
Chandler: I can't remember the last time I got a girl to take care of my monkey.
Joey: How do you get a monkey into a zoo?
Monica: Be that as it may, d'you think you could just help us out here on that monkey thing? Y'know, just for old times' sake? Go Bobcats?
Mr. Heckles: That's not my monkey. Just the dress is mine, you can send that back whenever.
Ross: No, y'know what, I guess it's partially my fault. Y'know, I shouldn't've, uh, asked you to start off with a monkey. I should've started you off with like a pen or a pencil.
Ross: Gimme back my monkey.
Monica: A monkey. Have you seen a monkey?
MONICA: You know, it still smells like monkey in there.
Monica: Mr. Heckles, our friend lost a monkey. Have you seen it?
Rachel: Now, now the one in the feather boa, that's Dr. Francis. Now, she used to be a man. Okay, now look, see, there's Raven. We hate her. We're glad she's dying. Okay- (Marcel pushes down a cushion to reveal a shoe) Wh- wh- Marcel, are you playing with Monica's shoes? You know you're not supposed to pl- whoah. Marcel, did you poo in the shoe? (Takes the shoe into the kitchen) Marcel, bad monkey! Oh! Oh! (She notices the newsletter and taps the contents of the shoes onto it, then folds it shut) Sorry, Barry. Little engagement gift. I'm sure you didn't register for that. (She leaves the apartment holding the newsletter at arm's length. However, she leaves the door open. Marcel runs out in the opposite direction. There is a shot from the TV and Rachel runs back in) Who died? Who died? Roll him over! Oh, c'mon, roll him over! Oh...! Well, we know it wasn't Dexter, right Marcel? Because- (Looks down and notices he is missing) Marcel? Marc- (Notices the open door)
(The unvoiced hissing continues. In alarm, Ross and Chandler look at the monkey, who is now in some distress.)
Ross: You've got to help me my monkey swallowed a 'K'!
Ross: I dont know whether hes testing me, or just acting out, but my monkey is out of control. But, he keeps erasing the messages on my machine, "supposedly" by accident.
Ross: (excited and simultaneously as Chandler) Hungry monkey! (To Chandler) Haaa! (To Joey) Id like a Wicked Wango card!
Mrs. Waltham: Were very sad that it didnt work out between you and Emily, monkey. But, I think youre absolutely delicious.
Rachel: (On the phone) Okay, he's a, he's a black capuchian monkey with a white face... (Enter Ross) ...with, with Russian dressing and, and pickles on the side. Okay. Thanks.
Joey: Have you ever slept in the same bed as a monkey?!
Ross: Hey, remember when I had a monkey?
Chandler: Yeah. I know it must be important to you when you start chattering like a monkey.
Ross: Oh come on. It's cold, it's dark, he doesn't know the Village. (Kicks a sign in frustration) And now I have a broken foot. I have no monkey, and a broken foot! Thank you very much.
Ross: What, you didnt get it? The doctor is a monkey.
Chandler: You are aware that shes not a monkey, right?
[What follows is the final set of flashbacks that feature a whole lot of lovin between Chandler and Joey. Theres no words, just hugs and even the kiss from The One With The Monkey. All of this is set to the song, Youve Really Got a Hold on Me!]
Mr. Heckles: That's my monkey. That's Patti, Patti the monkey.
Ross: Yeah, we thought we had a monkey, but we-we didn't.
Joey: Monkey lover!
Jennifer: That damn monkey.
Chandler: (disappointed and simultaneously as Ross) Hungry monkey.
Conan: That damn monkey.
Ross: Are you kidding? Okay, look. I-I studied evolution. Remember, evolution? Monkey into man? Plus, Im a doctor, and I had a monkey. Im Doctor Monkey!
Joey: I'm telling you, that monkey is a chick magnet! She's going to take one look at his furry, cute little face and it'll seal the deal.
Rachel: Alright. In high school I was the prom queen and I was the homecoming queen and the class president and you... were also there! But if you take this monkey, I will lose one of the most important people in my life. You can hate me if you want, but please do not punish him. C'mon, Luisa, you have a chance to be the bigger person here! Take it!
Monica: Oh! Enough! A monkey could have made 'em!
Joey: CURIOUS GEORGE (see link)! You know, the monkey, and the guy with the yellow hat!
Gavin: Exactly how contagious is this thing you have? I mean is it a cold for standing on the balcony or did a monkey bite you?
Ross: No, no. The vet says unless he's in a place where he has regular access to some... monkey lovin,' he's just gonna get vicious. I've just gotta get him into a zoo.
Luisa: (Out of shot) Here, monkey. Here, monkey! Here, monkey! (Marcel runs to the door and into Luisa's cage, which she slams shut) Gotcha.
Joey: Alright alright. You're a monkey. You're loose in the city. Where do you go?
Chandler: So Steve said he had to go to the doctor. And Steves doctors name is Doctor Muppy. So I said, Doctor Monkey? And that is how the whole Doctor Monkey thing came up. (He slams his feet up on the table to emphasize his point.)
Conan: Now you guys work with animals a lot. You had to work early on with a monkey
Joey: Well whats complicated? You spin the Wheel of Mayhem to go up the Ladder of Chance. You go past the Mud Hut through the Rainbow Ring to get to the Golden Monkey; you yank his tail and boom! Youre in Paradise Pond!
Joey: (makes a sound like a monkey) That noise can only me one thing.
[Cut to Monica and Chandler's, The One Where The Monkey Gets Away, Rachel is watching a soap opera with Marcel.]
Luisa: I could... but I won't. If I find that monkey, he's mine. (Leaves)