words in movies
[Scene: Ralph Lauren. Mr Zelner's office. Ross knocks on the door and enters.]
Mr Zelner: Oh right, uhm, Don?
Mr Zelner: Uh... What can I do for you?
Mr Zelner: Ah, did she ask you to come here and do this?
Mr Zelner: Wow, that is tempting.
Mr Zelner: She is good!
Mr Zelner: But I'm sorry. There's nothing I can do... Ah, it's not true, there is... nothing I want to do.
Ross: I see... Thanks very much. (he gets up and walks to the door. On his way out he looks at the photographs Mr Zelner has near his door. He picks one up.) Is this your son?
Mr Zelner: Yeah, his name is Ross. (Ross looks very surprised) What?
Mr Zelner: Yeah, they're all he talks about, why?
Ross: How would he like to come with me to the Museum of Natural History after everyone else has left, just the two of us, and he can touch anything he wants. (Mr. Zellner looks shocked). I just heard it as you must have heard it and that’s not good. Let me start again. I’m a paleontologist, you’ll be there with us and the touching refers only to bones… fossils!
Mr Zelner: You can really arrange that?
Mr Zelner: Well, I guess having Rachel back wouldn’t be the worst thing in the world.
Mr Zelner: That’s great. I worry about little Ross. He’s always reading, he's collecting rocks and he’s obsessed with dinosaurs.
[Scene: Mr. Zellner's office. There is a knock on the door.]
Ross: (enters) It's me. Ron. (Mr. Zellner looks annoyed) Look, I um, I now Rachel turned you down but I think there is a way you might be able to get her to come back.
Mr Zelner: This may surprise you, but re-hiring fired employees, is not my main job.
Mr Zelner: (obviously amused) Not good, Ron.
Mr Zelner: (Takes a long look at the egg while he considers it) Wow, that's pretty cool (Takes the egg from Ross)
Mr Zelner: Okay, you got it.
Mr Zelner: This is gonna make me very popular.
Mr Zelner: (looks at Ross, for a long moment, confused) I meant with my son.
Chandler: (To Monica) Why? Why-why-would youWh-why (To Mr. Geller) Look, I just dont want you to think that were animals who do it whenever we want.
Chandler: I can't believe you would actually say that. I would much rather be Mr.Peanut than Mr.Salty.
Mr. Geller: Wait, how do you zoom out? (zooms out and we see an extremely overweight Monica eating a big sandwich) There she is.
Phoebe: Don't feel bad. You know they used to like you a lot. But then you got promoted, and, you know, now you're like "Mr. Boss Man". You know, Mr. Bing. Mr. Bing, "Boss Man Bing".
Joey: Monicas chicken parm! Ill take care of it. (He picks up the phone) Hey Mr. Treeger, its Joey Tribbiani. Listen, I need to get into Monica and Chandlers apartment. Its an emergency. (Listens) Uhh, gas leak! Yeah oh, and bring garlic bread. (Hangs up.)
MR. DOUGLAS: Uh, listen Bing, I received your memo. So, we're not gonna receive the systems report until next Friday?
Mr. Geller: But pleasure is important, (To Chandler) and it helps if the woman has an orgasm. You up to the task sailor?
Mr. Geller: So when do I get to meet Emma and show her this? (Pulls a bouquet of flowers out of his sleeve.)
Rachel: Now you're probably going to hire one of the people who did not ah, (She puts her hands on his desk blotter and he moves it. Rachel then doesn't know where to put her hands.) who did, who did not umm, yell at you and storm out, and I think that's a big mistake and here's why. I made a huge fool of myself and I came back, that shows courage. When I thought you wanted sex in exchange for this job, I said no. That shows integrity. And, I was not afraid to stand up for myself and that shows courage. (Suddenly realizes that she said courage twice.) Okay umm, now I know I already said courage, but y'know you gotta have courage. And umm, and finally when I thought you were making sexual advances in the workplace, I said no and I was not litigious. {By the way, litigious means to want to litigate and litigate is to make a lawsuit against. So she didn't want to sue him. Don't worry, I had to look it up too.} So there you go, you got, you got (counts them off with her fingers) courage, you got integrity, you got (Pause) courage again, and not litigious. Look Mr
Mr. Geller: Honey, relationships are hard. Like with your Mom and me. You know after we graduated college we broke up for a while. It seems her Father, your Grandfather, wanted her to travel around Europe, like he did. Of course, he got to do it on Uncle Sam's nickel, because he was also strafing German troop trains at the time. However, (turns around and sees that Monica is sleeping and puts a blanket around her, kisses her, picks up the cigar, and starts watching the video)
Joey: Ah-ah-ah Mr. Smartie Pants, its just not my character thats not brain dead. Hey, so Pheebs, we still on for tonight?
Mr. Geller: (Looking at ht wedding bill.) What the hell!!!
Santos: Hello, Mr. Bing.
JOEY: Lookin' good Mr. Cotter.
Mr. Waltham: Shes in hiding. Shes utterly humiliated. She doesnt want to see you ever again.
MR. GELLER: [going downstairs] Rachel, ready or not, here comes your knight in shining. . . oh no. [Chip has shown up and the four are leaving]
[Scene: The Charity Event, Mr. Thompson is announcing the winners of the silent auction.]
Mr. Waltham: (Pleading.) You-you have to meet me in the middle here.
Mr. Geller: There was also leaves and guk and stuff.
Mr. Geller: Boy, Im glad I wore the big belt today.
Mr. Treeger: Could you tell Jasmine that I won't make it to yoga class today?
[Mr. Greene opens the door to Chandler and Joeys apartment. Ross sees him and runs to the door forcing him back in then holds onto the door knob.]
Mr. Zelner: Its kind of a risky joke Tag, and what is-what is this drawing I cant figure out what this is?
Mr. Geller: Ohh forget it. Too hell with tradition, were happy to do it.
Mr. Geller: Son, I had to shave my ears for tonight. You can do this.
MR. GELLER: Apparently, he told Johnny Shapiro that she's quite a girl. In fact, he told Johnny that he thinks he's falling in love with her.
[Scene: A hallway, Joey and Ross find Mr. Geller with his ear up against a janitors closet door.]
Joey's Doctor: Kidney stones! Now, ordinarily Mr. Tribbiani, we try to break up the stones up with shock waves, but they're to close to the bladder now. Which means we can either wait for you to pass them or else go up the urethra
(Scene 4: Everyone in the hall outside Mr. Heckles' door. Ross is carrying the box of bananas. He bangs on the door)
Mr. Geller: Your make-up kit? Id feel better.
Ross: Well Mr. Big Shot is better than wethead.
Mr. Geller: Well you gotta get at it princess! When your mother and I were trying to conceive you, whenever she was ovulating, bam, we did it. Thats how I got my bad hip.
Phoebe: (feels his arm) Yeah the material feels so softhello Mr. Bicep! Have you been working out?
Rachel: Hi! (to mr Zellner) Excuse us.
ROSS: Don't be silly. Ben loves you. He's just being Mr. Crankypants.
Rachel: Oh God... well, it started about a half hour before the wedding. I was in the room where we were keeping all the presents, and I was looking at this gravy boat. This really gorgeous Lamauge gravy boat. When all of a sudden- (to the waitress that brought her coffee)Sweet 'n' Lo?- I realized that I was more turned on by this gravy boat than by Barry! And then I got really freaked out, and that's when it hit me: how much Barry looks like Mr. Potato Head. Y'know, I mean, I always knew looked familiar, but... Anyway, I just had to get out of there, and I started wondering 'Why am I doing this, and who am I doing this for?'. (to Monica) So anyway I just didn't know where to go, and I know that you and I have kinda drifted apart, but you're the only person I knew who lived here in the city.
[Scene: Mr. Zelner's office, Rachel has come back again to try and do that second interview.]
Chandler: This is okay. Were all adults here; theres nothing to be ashamed of. Now, lets put our underwear in our pockets and walk out the door. (They do so and find Mr. Geller leaning against a wall stunned.)
[Scene: Mr. Ratstatter's (RTST) office. Monica is there about a job.]
Mr Campbell: Well, if you don't want to leave, why are we having this lunch?
Ross: Uh Mr. Morse, can I speak to you for a moment?
MR. GREENE: Happy birthday sweetpea.
Mr. Franklin: Hey-hey! Bing? Was that Bob from six you were just talking too?
Mr. Geller: (Forcefully.) Hey, you keep pushing me on this, my foots going to meet the middle of your ass.
[Scene: The Gellers Garage, continued from earlier. Ross and Mr. Geller are still deciding what to do.]
Chandler: Mr. Millionaire, new from Snooty Playthings! Third wife sold separately.
MR. GELLER: Press the button.
Mr. Geller: (shaking her hand) So are you his mother or his father?
Mr. Geller: Of course it did. They're made of wicker.
[Scene: Chandlers Office, hes working at his computer as his boss, Mr. Franklin, sticks his head in.]
[Scene: Treegers apartment, Joey knocks and Mr. Treeger opens the door.]
MR. HECKLES: I could have birds.
Mr. Zelner: Fair enough.
MR. GELLER: I may not know any of your flash dances but I'm no slouch on the dance floor.
Mr. Geller: (embarrassed) Judy, the kids..
Mr. Bowmont: What the hell, its for a good cause! All right!
MR. GREENE: ...what the hell does she want with half a boat...
Mr. Waltham: (entering) I almost forget the tickets, didnt I?
(There is a knock on the door, Phoebe answers it, its Mr. Heckles)
Mr. Heckles: (as Phoebe and Rachel leave) You owe me a cat.
Mr. Geller: Theres no way in hell, Im paying for it.
JANITOR: Hmm, Lipson knows huh? Ahh, hello Mr. Opossum, enigma of the trees, upside-down denizen of the night, taunting gravity with...
Mr. Douglas: Well, were gonna be layin off people in every department.
Joey: Hey Mr. and Mrs. Geller! Let me help you with that.
Mr. Geller: Chandler, Im gonna have you arrested.
Mr. Geller: Happy birthday, sweetie! Give us a hug! (Starts to get up.)
Monica: (Closing the door) Goodbye Mr.Heckles.
MR. GREENE: Did you know your mother spent $1200 dollars on bansai trees. I felt like Gulliver around that place.
Mr. Tribbiani: You're gonna keep an eye on us?
MR. GREENE: What? The father can't drop by to see the daughter on her birthday?
Mr.Heckles: I can hear you through the ceiling. My cats cant sleep.
Mr. Treeger:: Yeah, but yknow, I think the reason were not getting that spin right is because my apartments too small.
Mr. Geller: I think there are people in there having sex.
Ross: Hi! (To Mrs. Bing) Hi! (Mr. Bing starts rubbing his arm.) Hi. Has umm, anyone seen Chandler?
Monica: (voice on answering machine) Hi! If youre calling before Saturday, youve reached Monica and Chandler. But if youre calling after Saturday, youve reached Mr. and Mrs. Bing! Please leave a message for the Bings!
Mr. Geller: Listen to me! When my time comes, I wanna be buried at sea.
Mr. Geller: I'd like that.
MRS. GREENE: Oh well thank you. Such a gentleman. Thank you. [Chandler takes the hot pink coat and grimaces at it] Ahh, it all looks so nice, so festive, all the balloons... [Chandler, remembering that Joey and Mr. Greene are in the bedroom, throws her coat in a cupboard] The funniest thing happened to me on the way here. I was...[Joey peeks out]
Chandler: Have you figured out what started the fire Mr. Fireman?
Judge: So based on your petition you are seeking an annulment on the grounds that Mr. Geller is mentally unstable.
Chandler: Mr. and Mrs. Geller, you look wonderful, it is great to have you hear, let us take off your coats!
Mr. Geller: Whaddya got there?
Chandler: Well, aren't we Mr. "The glass is half empty."
Mark: Okay, okay look, I know I'm being Mr. Inappropriate today, but it's just so tough, I mean see you walking around and I just wanna touch you and hold you, come on no one's around, just, just kiss me.
Salon girl: Ok. Very good. Have a seat right over here Mr. Bing and Sonia will be right with you.
Mr. Geller: Beautiful! (Turns to watch with him)
Mr. Thompson: Our next item is the romantic trip to Paris. (Pause.) It goes to Emil Alexander high a high bid of 2,300.
Mr. Geller: Why would you serve food on such a sharp stick? (Looking a toothpick)
Mr. Thompson: Your generous contribution brings us a big step closer to building the youth center.
Mr. Thompson: So glad you brought someone.
Mrs. Bing: Mr. Geller.
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Mr. Tribbiani is on the phone.]
Mr Zellner: (confused) That's great!
Monica: All right relax Mr. Ive Had Sex Four Times!
Mr. Tribbiani: Remember when you were a little kid, I used to take you to the navy yard and show you the big ships?
Mr. Tribbiani: We'll go to a hotel.
Mr. Tribbiani: (To Phoebe) What happened to the, uh, puppet guy?
Mr. Geller: Yknow how the garage floods every Spring?
Mr. Tribbiani: Thank you. Uh...
Mr. Tribbiani: Huh?