words in movies
Rachel: (stopping a nurse who's coming out of a room) Oh, uhm, excuse me, I'm here to see my father. My name is Rachel Green.
Nurse: Absolutely.
Nurse: He's under sedation, so he's pretty much out.
Nurse: Miss Green, your father's doctor is on the phone if you'd like to speak to him.
Ross (he buzzes for the nurse) Let's see if we can get that Rachel back here.
(The nurse attending to the babies hears this, turns and stares at Chandler. Chandler moves Monica to the side and away from the nurse.)
Chandler: Oh, is this about you-you dating the nurse? Yeah, Joey already told me, and I am so-so fine. I mean, you and I we're just, y'know, we're nothing, we're goofin' around.
Joey: Well hey-hey if she needs any idea for costumes, she could be a bikini model, or a slutty nurse, or a sexy cheerleader huhOoh-ooh, Leatherface from The Texas Chainsaw MassacreNo-no-no! Slutty Leatherface.
Nurse: Im sorry. Semi-private rooms are all we have.
Nurse: Fill this out and bring it back to me.
[Scene: Rachels Doctors Office, she is waiting for her doctor as a nurse enters.]
Nurse: Im sorry, that information is restricted to hospital staff
Nurse: Dr. Richard Burke is out of town. Dr. Timothy Burke, his son, will see you now.
Nurse: Why?
(Theres a knock on the door and a nurse enters carrying Emma.)
Chandler: (to nurse) Let me ask you, do you have to be Carol's lesbian life partner?
Nurse: Mrs. Geller?
[Scene: Rachel and Barrys bedroom, Rachel is watching Days of Our Lives. Of course its a Dr. Drake Remoray scene. Its set in a hospital room, and Dr. Wesley and a nurse are talking about a female patient with a bandage around her head.]
Nurse: Well, you know your insurance will cover that.
Nurse: (Grimacing) Mmm hmmm.
Nurse: You're that stupid.
(They reach the desk. The bored nurse thinks she's heard it all before.)
Nurse: It's just her water breaking. Calm down, will you?
Nurse: Out!
Nurse: Breathe, breathe, breathe...
Nurse: All right, honey, time to start pushing.
Nurse: This almost never happens!
Nurse: (angrily) You go get that animal outta here.
Phoebe: (to the nurse) Excuse me? Could you help me with something? The patient Im looking for has a broken leg and is in a wheelchair. And umm, hes like early to mid-thirties, very attractive.
Nurse: My god. You still have your Christmas lights up?
Chandler: So, are you really gonna go out with that nurse man?
Nurse: Excuse me... This hospital is for people!
Nurse: Yes, I see that here. Unfortunately we cant guarantee a private room and currently theyre all unavailable.
Chandler: Joeys gonna be thrilled! He was hoping youd come by as a slutty nurse.
Nurse: (to Joey) Breathe, breathe, breathe.
Nurse: Hi.
Nurse: All right, all right, there's a few too many people in this room, and there's about to be one more, so anybody who's not an ex-husband or a lesbian life partner, out you go!
[Scene: The Western front during World War I, Phoebe, in yet another past life, is once again a nurse tending to yet another dying soldier. But this time she's doing it with a French accent.]
(Monica returns with the nurse and they go into Nana's room.)
Chandler: (to another female nurse) Hey, how 'bout it? You, me, Saturday night?
Nurse: Dr. Burke will see you know.
Doctor: Ill be right with you. Okay? (to the nurse) Thanks, Wendy.
Nurse: Now, which of you is the father? (Points to Joey and Ross)
Nurse: Well
Phoebe: (to the nurse) Hi.
Joey: Come on, Lydia, you can do it. Push! Push 'em out, push 'em out, harder, harder. Push 'em out, push 'em out, way out! Let's get that ball and really move, hey, hey, ho, ho. Let's (notices the nurse looking at him strangely) I was justyeah, right. Push! Push!
Nurse: (not sure what to do with that) Okay
Male Nurse: Rachel.
Rachel: Honey, listen, y'know what? The nurse said the doctor is wonderful.
Delivery Room Nurse: No.
(A male nurse enters.)
Male Nurse: Hey!
(Nana passes for the second time and the nurse pulls the blanket over her. Ross and Monica go to tell the family)
Rachel: Hi, Pheebs? Okay, so just spoke to the nurse and the reason that your doctor is late is because uh, she's not coming.
Rachel: Okay. (The nurse exits.) Oh man, I swear if they sold these at Pottery Barn
Nurse #2: Its not hopeless! Dr. Stryker Remorays a miracle worker. Look, here he comes.
Ross: Y'know how-how the nurse said that-that Nana had passed? Well, she's not, quite..
Ross: Okay. Okay. (To the nurse behind the desk.) Umm hi, this is Rachel Green. Im Ross Geller. We-we called from the car.
Lydia: I wasn't by myself. I had a doctor, a nurse, and a helper guy. (Joey smiles) So, did you see who won the game?
Chandler: Weirdest thing. Did I hear(A nurse opens the privacy screen and Chandler sees Janice)Mother of God its true!
Nurse: Okay Rachel, are you comfortable?
Nurse: Why dont we try massaging the breast to stimulate the flow. (Does so.)
Nurse: You are an idiot. (She hands over a blank form).
[Scene: The Emergency Room. The officious admissions nurse is again on duty. Rachel and Monica enter, looking worried. As they approach the desk, Rachel adopts a winning smile, while Monica struggles to smile at all.]
[Scene: The Semi-Private Labor Room, Evil Bitch and Sick Bastard are gone and Ross has just finished talking to a nurse as Rachel stands and stretches.]
[Scene: The Hospital. Erica is moaning and about to give birth. Monica, Chandler, a nurse and a doctor are there with her.]
Joey: Yeah. Listen to the slutty nurse.
(Meanwhile, Rachel has taken another call, from a nurse she'd hoped never to hear from again.)
Nurse: Hi!
Nurse: Hes in room 816.
Nurse: Would you like to see a semi-private room?
Nurse: Dr. Drake who?
Nurse: A doctor at this hospital?
Nurse #1: This poor guys been in a coma for five years. Its hopeless.
Nurse: This is a hospital.
Nurse: The doctor will be here in a minute to do your sonogram.
Ross: The nurse said theyre bringing in another woman.
Nurse: I think I know who youre talking about.
Nurse: (To Ross) Rossy, we're ready for you.
Nurse: (calling to the woman) This rooms available.
Ross: Yeah. Shes putting her down now, thats her. (Points to the nurse putting Emma now.)
Ross: Thank you. (The nurse exits.)
(Another woman with a nurse and doctor enter, the woman is screaming.)
Nurse: I dont think the next patient is very far along.
(Theres a knock on the door and the Nurse enters carrying Emma.)
Nurse: Ill come back for her later.
Nurse: Hey, she just woke up! Shes hungry. Why dont we give this another try?
(The doctor hands the boy to the nurse, and she walks over to another part of the room with him.)
Monica: Okay. Lets hurryOh wait! Do we have a condom? (He looks at her.) Oh right! (Laughs and they resume making out when a nurse catches them in the act.)
Chandler: So, are you really gonna go out with that nurse man?
Nurse: Youve done all you can Dr. Wesley. You have got to let her go.
(a nurse walks in)
Chandler: So Dan, nurse not a doctor huh? Kinda girlie isn't it?
Nurse: We're going to take Erica to recovery now.
Nurse: We'll just get him cleaned up a bit.
Monica: (to the nurse) Hi, (tiny laugh) um, I'm gonna need a new set of (tiny laugh) these forms (tiny laugh).
(Rachel glares at the nurse, who gives Monica a form attached to a clipboard.)
(A nurse shows another couple into the room.)
Ross: Oh. Yeah. (Sarcastically) Uh Chandler let me win. No, Chandlers really strong. Oh my arm is so sore. Oh nurse! (Waddles over to Mona.)
Nurse: Mr. Bing? (Chandler jumps up) Here you are! You'll go into that room and deposit your specimen into the container.
(A nurse gives Monica a pair of scissors. Monica gives it to Chandler, and they cut it together.)
(The nurse comes out of Nana's room.)
Joey: Well how about this one? Testing the effects of Joey Tribbiani on attractive nurse receptionists.
Nurse: Hey! Are you ready to try nursing again?
Nurse: Just so you know, Dr. Long cant be here today, she was called to the hospital, so Dr. Schiff will be seeing you.