words in movies
[Cut to the bathroom, Joey is taking a shower and Phoebe knocks on the door.]
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler, Monica, Joey and Rachel are there. Rachel is writing something on a pad, and then crumples it up and throws it on the floor.]
Phoebe: Being pregnant is tough on your tummy.
Joshua: Oh great! (He tries on the coat.) Wow! Yeah, its comfortable.
Joshua: Yknow, I wore that cashmere sweater on a date last night.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's erm, Chandler and Joey's, Ross is writing on the Magna-Doodle as Rachel enters.]
Joey: Yeah, what going on?
(She tries to demonstrate this unique ability, but only succeeds in choking on it.)
Phoebe: Ooh, yeah. Then what are you going to put on top of that?
Phoebe: Ooh yeah! Then umm, what goes on top of the salami?
Emily: (with her coat on, shes leaving with Ross) Thank you so much for this. It was really so thoughtful of you.
[Cut to later, the whole group is seated on the floor and Rachel is explaining the rules of Spin the Bottle.]
Rachel: (spinning the bottle) So, Spin the Bottle works like this: I spin the bottle, it lands on Gunther, so I would have to kiss Gunther. (She crawls over to where Gunther is sitting and sees the look of anticipation on Gunthers face and decides not to kiss him.) All right. Who wants to go first?
(Emily spins the bottle and it lands on Joey.)
(Joey spins the bottle and it lands on Emily.)
(Emily spins the bottle and once again, it lands on Joey.)
(Rachel spins the bottle and it lands on .wait for it .Joshua. (You thought I was going to say Ross, didnt you?) Rachel squeals in delight and starts a slow sexy crawl over to Joshua, making sure he and everyone else watching gets a good look at her cleavage.)
Chandler: Theres a Phoebe on my sandwich! (He walks away, giving the sandwich to Phoebe.)
Joey: All right look, yknow how-yknow how when youre dating someone and you dont want to cheat on them, unless its with someone really hot?
Emily: But, we cant go now. It looks like Rachels gonna put on a skit.
Rachel: Im fine! Im fine! Im just losing a tooth, its no big deal. I have a dentist! Yknow. Im gonna go put some ice on it. Excuse me. (She goes over to the ice and Joey and Monica follow her.) What do I do now? What do I do now?
Rachel: All right, come on, lets go get your coat.
Rachel: Oh, yeah! Real fun. (She makes a decision.) Yknow, this bra Really, bothers me. (She starts taking off her bra.) Yknow, this used to be my bedroom. Yeah. A lot of memories in here, a lot of memories. If these walls could talk, yknow what theyd say? Wanna hear some memories? (She is now violently pulling on her bra in order to remove it, but it isnt co-operating.)
(She is still yanking on the bra, but it is stuck in her sleeve. Finally, she gives up.)
Rachel: Ughhhh!! Forget it! (Sits down heavily on the bed.) This is, this is not how this is supposed to happen.
Joshua: Yeah! I mean youre-youre beautiful and smart and sophisticateda lot of this isnt based on tonight.
[Scene: The hallway, Ross is sitting on the step drinking a beer as Rachel comes out of the guys apartment.]
Rachel: Is there room on that step for a pathetic loser?
(They move to kiss, but realise that Chandler is staring at them. Chandler urges them on.)
Joey: After she gave me that big speech?! She goes and makes a date with a guy on the same night she has plans with me? I think shes trying to pull a fast one on Big Daddy!
Ross: That's different, okay. That's like, uh 'Who dated a stripper?' or 'Who did it on the back of the Staton Island Ferry?'.
Monica: No, you were right. I don't have a plan. (There's a knock on the door.)
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe is on the couch as Monica enters.]
[Time lapse. The girls have Ross pinned face down. Phoebe is sitting on his back and arms while holding his head down and facing Rachel. Rachel is sitting on his knees and holding his lower legs vertically, causing Ross pain.]
MONICA: Exactly. Oh, I love that I can be totally neurotic around you now. Tell me the truth. Don't you like it better now that everything on your desk is perpendicular?
Ross: (sounds excited) Hi you guys! what's going on, you... you guys wanna hang out...or...? (Looks around the room nervously) do you...do you guys hear a buzzing?
(Monica holds her hands out for a hug, but instead of hugging her, Amanda hangs her purse on one of Monica's extended arms.)
(Rachel backs out with a confused look on her face.)
Ross: Nothing, ah there was this thing at the museum. Come on. (they go into her apartment) Easy.
Joey: Is it on me? I feel, I feel like it's on me! I got, hey! (He storms into his room)
SUSIE: Um, so listen, how many times am I gonna have to touch you on the arm before you ask me on a date.
Joey: Now you cant tell anyone, but uh I put on shiny lip balm.
Phoebe: Oh, and great! You might as well bring me my book, its on the counter in your apartment.
Chandler: I'd keep an eye on him! We have to find out which one the father is.
Monica: Please. Half the guys out there have makeup on.
Rachel: Okay. Honey, I would love for you to go with me. (Ross has a worried look on his face) What?
Joey: Oh thats right. Theres a lot going on here and I think I ate some bad fruit earlier.
[Scene: Phoebe's apartment. There's a knock on the door, and Phoebe opens it.]
Phoebe: Give her a break, it's hard being on your own for the first time.
Joey: Listen uh, could you put Kathy on, I wanna apologize.
Rachel: I dont know. Do-do you have any clothes on?
Monica: (entering from her bedroom) Okay, sperm donor number 03815, come on down! Okay, he's 6'2", 170 pounds, and he describes himself as a male Geena Davis.
Chandler: Oh come on Ross, I think were all losers here.
Phoebe: I cant believe this! How long as this been going on?
Monica: Come on! Tests make us all better learners! Oh yeah! (Running out) We should have essay questions!!
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Monica is still sick and is hobbling out into the living room for some help from Chandler whos on the couch reading.]
[Scene: The delivery room, later on, Rachel, Chandler, Monica, and Frank are there as Dr. Harad is checking out Phoebe.]
Phoebe: Okay fine! Fine! Well just have to think of some other way to put the whole Who came onto who, thing to rest! Come on now, think!!
Joey: A handsome man enters. (Playing the part of the handsome man.) Hey! How's it going guys? I don't know what you two were talking about, but I'd like to say thanks to both of you. You, (Ross) you wouldn't let me give up on myself, and you (Chandler) well you co-created Fireball. The end.
(There's a knock on the door and it's Paul.)
Ross: Thats right! Thats right! Saran Wrap on the toilet seat so the pee goes everywhere!
Ross: Come on! Come on! Here, okay-okay, you see this? (Points) This tiny thing that looks like a peanut?
MR. GREENE: What? The father can't drop by to see the daughter on her birthday?
Gavin: Exactly how contagious is this thing you have? I mean is it a cold for standing on the balcony or did a monkey bite you?
Chandler: (To Phoebe) Y'know what? I have been trying to apologize to him all week! If he's not gonna let me do it on the phone, I'm gonna go down there and do it in person.
Monica: (To Phoebe) Oh my God, my ass is sweating! (on phone) Please! Please! Can you come? Its today at four.
Mr. Geller: Kids, I spoke to a doctor and picked up this pamphlets on how to get pregnant. (He slides them under the door.)
(Joey and Ross enter. Phoebe and Mike are sitting on the couch, reading a magazine.)
Monica: Okay, just stay there a couple more hours and if she doesnt show up by then, then just come on home.
Sandy: I er... I hope you don't mind. I used some of my home-made lotion on Emma. It's a mixture of calendula and honey cream. It'll dry that rash right up. Plus... It keeps the hands young... (it makes Rachel smile)
Monica: All right baby, come on! (Rolls the dice) Yes! Yes! I am on fire!
Rachel: Well, I-I-Ive been on Standby for a flight home for hours.
Joey: We broke down on the Parkway, so I have to walk back and get some transmission fluid. And hey, listen could you please tell Kathy that Ill be there as soon as I can.
Ross: (on tape) I mean I I know I wanted to. I just, I just wasnt sure if you wanted to.
[Scene: Rosss Bedroom, Ross is waking up. He straightens himself out on the bed and puts the covers over his head.]
Fake Monica: So once they caught on to the fact that we're, y'know, short and have breasts...
Joey: Come on man! You never want to do anything since you and Janice broke up.
Rachel: Ok-dokey, Joey, listen. This is gonna be bridesmaid central, all right? We're gonna have hair and make-up going on in the bathroom and oh, I had to move a couple of things in the fridge to make room for the corsages.
(He goes to the bathroom and Phoebe puts some pepper and salt on her food. With the salt she takes a bit and throws it over her left shoulder as she faces us.)
MR. GREENE: Did you know your mother spent $1200 dollars on bansai trees. I felt like Gulliver around that place.
Ross: Okay, so on our no-date evening, three of you now have dates.
(He reaches up higher and knocks down another shoebox lid. Sweet 'n' Lo's rain down on him)
[Scene: The desert outside of Las Vegas, Joey is arriving and we hear the song, Name. Y'know, (singing) I've been through the desert on a horse with no name! It felt good to be out of the rain. In the desert, you can't remember your name, 'cause there ain't no one for to give you no pain. La la la-la-la, la, la, la, la-la-la. You get the idea. Anyhoo, he pulls up and stops. As he gets out of the car, he spills a huge pill of fast food containers out of the foot well.]
[Joey enters, his shoes have bells on, which jingle as he walks. He is wearing a long coat.]
(There's a knock on the door and Chandler gets up to answer it. He opens the door to reveal Monica with a turkey over her head.)
(He knocks on the girls door and walks in. Surprise! The girls, obviously using Star Trek technology, have completely moved everything in both apartments back to their original positions, all in the time it took for the guys to go to a basketball game. Wow! Anyhoo, Chandler is stunned, and Joey doesnt even realise it.)
Monica: Come on, that was back in high school! How could that still bother you?
Ross: Joey, come on now, for me! Please, just-just try to focus your sexual energy on someone else.
MONICA: No honey. You have to sleep on this side of the bed because I have to sleep on this side of the bed.
Joey: Alright, when'd'ya have it on last?
Ross: Hey, itll grow back, right? And she-shes really fun, and shes cool, and-and Im finally moving on. Y'know? I mean getting over Rachel was so (makes an incoherent nasal sound), y'know? Y'know, and Im finally feeling sane again. And now if I go up there, and-and I kiss her, and, Gooood I wanna kiss her, and-and-and it doesnt work out, right? Do I really wanna put myself through that again?
Phoebe: All right, whats going on there? (Points to a picture.)
Ross: Take thee, Rachel...(All his friends have looks of shock on their faces. He realizes what he said. Quickly he says.) Emily. (A slight chuckle.) Emily.
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler is reading on the couch while Joey, still suffering from his hernia, is returning with coffee for them both. After a series of grunts and groans he manages to painfully walk back from the counter, sit down, and slide Chandler his coffee.]
Ross: No! No, come on let her sleep! Shes so exhausted.
Rachel: Ross said my name up there, I mean, come on, I just cant pretend that didnt happen can I?
All: Oh, come on! Come on!
(Joey hugs Rosss neck and has a look of complete contentment on his face which, after a short while, causes David and Matt to start laughing.)
Chandler: Hey! Babe! Arent you excited were going on our honeymoon?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Everyone is there. Monica is watching stock prices on a business channel.]
Joey: (Looking at himself in the reflection on a knife) How do I look?
Alan: (on the intercom) It's Alan.
Rachel: (on the phone) No, no, no, Im looking at a purchase order right here and it clearly states that we ordered the Rivera bikini in a variety of sizes and colours. And.... (listens) What does it matter, what Im wearing?! Can I please speak to your supervisor? (listens) Thank you. (to Sophie) Were holding.
Chandler: Oh come on, come on, it can't be that bad.
Ross: Oh, god. (He puts his head down on the grill) You know, this is still pretty hot. (He picks his head up, and a mushroom sticks to his head. Carol picks it off and eats it.)
(Ross, urged on by his team-mates, jumps on top of the scrum and falls headfirst into the middle, leaving his feet sticking straight up.)
Joey: Come on, Chandler, Ross is our friend. He needs us right now, so why don't you be a grown up and come and watch some TV in the fort!
Chandler: Okay, I've been doing a lot of thinking about us, y'know a lot of uhh, us thinking. And uh, well I guess there's only one-one way to do this. (He slowly and awkwardly gets down on one knee.)
(Chandler is putting on the Chap Stick the same way that women put on lipstick, including the bit with the piece of tissue.)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment, everyone is watching the tape of the sonogram. Rachel is on the phone.]
Monica: What's going on with you?
[Scene: A Theater, there is a casting session going on for a play.]
Chandler: Oh, come on! Its not like this is an everyday occurrence for me! I mean usually Im pretty much just in there by myself.
Ross: You can totally, totally live on this.
Joey: Come on baby, dont go. Please? What do you say?
David: Uh no, I have to go in a few hours. I have to be on the red-eye. Well listen, yknow, next time youre in Minsk umm
Rachel: (to Joanne) So what's going on with you?
Ross: Is that what they say on the Figure Skating Team?
Rachel: Alright, come on... (starts to knock on the door) Alright, you guys. We're so sorry we're late. Please let us in, so we can have dinner together.
Rachel: What? What? Ross, you're scaring me. What's going on?
Rachel: (still not quite able to look at him) Hi! I love you on that show! I watch you everyday! I mean, when you took out your own kidney to save your ex-wife even though she tired to kill you
Chandler: Hey, look, we're on that TV thing!
Dr. Long: Huh. Nice to meet you. Ill get started on this.
Monica: Oh yes! I have it right here, on ice! (She takes a bag of ice out of her purse and hands it to the doctor.)
Phoebe: Wow! This place is incredible! (Gasps) Stings pen that he gave to Phoebe. (Puts the pen in her purse and goes over to a floor-to-ceiling bookcase) Come on! Secret passageway! (Starts pulling books at random as Trudie enters.)
[Scene: Joey's apartment. He walks in reading his mail, and plays back his messages on the answering machine]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, the girls are all out on the balcony.]
Rachel: (on phone) Daddy... Daddy... Daddy, why whyyy would I sleep with Billy Dreskin? His father tried to put you out of business! (Rachel turns to Monica, clasping the receiver to her bosom so Dr.Green can't hear, while mouthing "You are...") ...dead!
Ross: Dr. Green. How are you? (offers his hand, and Dr. Green puts his scarf on it.)