words in movies
Chandler: (sitting down on the arm of her chair) You didnt think I used to wear glasses, right?
Phoebe: You mean the one that my grandmother made me swear on her deathbed that I would never let out of our family?
Phoebe: If you dont sail your boat, what do you do on it?
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler and Monica are there. He takes off his glasses and starts chewing on the ear piece.]
Ross: Or you can sit with him on the front porch and make sure no one steals the trash cans. He does that every week too.
[Scene: The Mr. Bowmont (Joeys boat), shes shown to be in one of the waterways around New York, but in reality shes in a sound stage on the Warner Bros. lot and we see New York from the water in some rather poor green screen shots. Rachel and Joey are on board.]
Joey: Come on Rach, not again. I got it! Okay? Lets start sailing, and I want to go over there (Points) where that boatload of girls is! (Yelling to them) Yo-ho-ho!
Rachel: Okay, you just go on and make your little jokey-jokes, but if you do not know what you are doing out at sea you will die at sea. Am I getting through to you sailor?! (She punctuates each word by slapping him on the forehead.)
Ross: Well I had a great time! Umm, Chancy on the other hand
Mr. Geller: Have a seat son. (You can see Mr. Geller sitting closer to the door as Chandler walks over and sits in his lap.) Hey!! (Chandler quickly jumps off and sits next to him with a shocked expression on his face.)
Phoebe: Come on, its not that big a deal!
Monica: (takes the phone from Ross) Come on. (Answering phone) Hello? (Listens) Im sorry you have the wrong number. (Listens) (Whispering) Okay, Ill call you later dad. I love you. (Hangs up.)
Rachel: Well hello! So, when are we gettin back out on the water matey?
Joey: Because! Youre mean on the boat!
Ross: Yeeeeeep Yep-yep-yep-yep-yep. I remember when she took out on her dads boat she wouldnt let me help at all.
Rachel: Look Joey, Im sorry if-if you thought that was mean, but I gotta tell ya something. That was not mean. Okay, my father is mean. He used to yell at me all the time on the boat, I mean it was horrible. I was just being a good teacher.
Rachel: Okay, go to the left. (Joey goes starboard or sits on the right side of the boat.) The left!
Joey: Oh, yknow what? Since Im here, I think Im gonna have me a little beer on the port side. (Grabs and opens one.)
Rachel: Joey, come on! We just went over this! (She does it instead.)
Joey: Yeah! Come on.
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, the cookie trying period has pasted. Monica, Phoebe, and Ross are reflecting on the days events.]
Ross: Aww, Pheeb, come on isnt there any relative that would have the recipe? What about, what about your sister?
Phoebe: (reading the recipe on the back of the bag) Yes!! (Realizes.) Ohh.
Joey: Yeah, yeah. Hey, why dont you give a pull on that rope? (Points.)
Joey: Just pull on it.
Monica: Okay, all right dont judge me to much. Okay? Um, but I saw this info-mercial, and um, I swear to you I have never-ever bought anything on TV before, except for this mop. But there was this stuff on leg waxing, it just, it looked so amazing....
Rachel: What? You guys, come on! What am I going to do?
Monica: Im gonna go across the hall to check on the yams.
(Theres a knock on the door and Joey answers it to Wayne.)
Rachel: Oh yeah. Okay, see mom, the truth is I can do this on my own.
PHOEBE: Well, 'cause, I mean, what if, what if he's not this great dad guy? I mean, what if, what if he's just still the dirtbag who ran out on my mom and us? You know what? I've already lost a fake dad this week and I don't think I'm ready to lose a real one.
Rachel: Ok, Paulo, why don't you just go get dressed, and then you be on your way, ok, bye-bye. (Paulo goes into his room.)
Joey: I saw this movie once where there was a door and no one knew what was behind it, and when they finally got it open millions and millions and millions of bugs came pouring out and they feasted on human flesh. Yknow it wouldnt kill ya to respect your wifes privacy! (He walks away and into his apartment and looks the door.) Stupid closet full of bugs!
Chandler: (annoyed) Oh come on!!
Chandler: Ooh. Uh, I don't know how to tell you this, but she's in Monica's bedroom, getting it on with Max, that scientist geek. Ooh, look at that, I did know how to tell you.
Ross: What?! While shes been going through this hell, youve been making money?! Youre betting on your friend staying in this misery?! (Phoebe lowers her head and shakes it yes.)
Amy: Oh my god. You're on Days of Our Lives.
SUSIE: It's nice to see you're not still wearing that denim cap with all the little mirrors on it.
<they hug and kiss on check>
Chandler: (To Joey) Would you put that back on?! Monicas gonna be here any minute!
(Ross starts jumping and screaming incoherently and hops over and joins in on the group hug.)
Monica: (entering quickly) Shes a hooker! Shes a hooker! Shes a (Stops as she sees her.) Hi! Uh, we spoke on the phone. (Goes and shakes the hookers hand.)
Joey: If you go to a hotel you'll be...doing stuff. I want you right here where I can keep an eye on you.
Amy with confused look on face: Yeah I.. I think so. <sticks her hand out to shake hands with Phoebe and says to her> It's nice to meet you Emma.
The Cooking Teacher: Okay. Lets move on.
Phoebe: Huh? Can you just imagine getting down on one knee and handing her this gorgeous piece of weaponry?
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Rachel is sitting in Joeys lap on Francette, and theyre both groaning.]
Ross: Whats uh, whats going on? Do you not, do you not like Katie?
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe, Ross, and Rachel are sitting on the couch and Ross is talking to Rachels, who is now showing, stomach.]
Rachel: Yeah, I admit it. I have a crush on you, and uh, and, and I know that's crazy because we work together, and-and nothing could ever happen, and the last thing I want to do is-is to freak you out or make you feel uncomfortable. Which is why it would be really great if you said something right about now.
Chandler: Oh, you don't want me on the trip?
PHOEBE: Well, come on, who cares what that guy thinks. What does Warren Beatty know about kissing (Chandler and Monica, give her a look that says 'think about it') Ooh.
Rachel: Thats right, still no baby! (To Monica, Joey, and Chandler on the couch) Come on people! Please make some room!
Ross: Oh sure. (He sits on the apothecary table and touches her hand.)
Rachel: Oh! Yay! Look! Theres a piece that doesnt have floor on it!
Chandler: Oh, I figured you guys would all be mad at me. So I got you some gifts that I found on the side of the road. (Looks into the bag.) Who wants the teddy bear with one leg?
Phoebe: Youre on!
Phoebe: Fine! Youre on!
Monica: Im actually with her on this one.
[Scene: Central Perk, Monica and Chandler are on the couch as Phoebe enters with Monicas soul mate.]
Phoebe: (on phone) 'Right, well look, um, if Joey loses this audition, that is it for Estelle. I don't care! Annie you are a doll, what time can you see him?' (to Monica) I need a pen. (Chandler hands her one, but she needs something to right on, so she tilts Chandler's head over and writes on the back of his neck)
Ross: Come on, finish your enchilada.
[Scene: Caesar's Palace Casino, Joey is approaching one of the blackjack tables on his quest to make enough money for his movie.]
Phoebe: I see. Nice sidestep on the do do thing by the way.
JOEY: OK, we'll just leave, and when we pass her on the stairs, she won't know it's me 'cause we've never met. CHANDLER: That's how radio stars escape stalkers.
Phoebe: You guys, um I know that this really doesn't have anything to do with me, but um I love you guys too. (Joins in on the hug.) Oh, I really needed that. (Goes and sits down.)
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler is on the couch as Monica joins him.]
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, time lapse, Ross is entering. Chandler and Monica are at the kitchen table. Rachel is on the couch reading.]
[Scene: Monica and Chandlers. Chandler is sitting on the couch staring at the tape on the coffee table with his eyes huge and his mouth wide open.]
Monica: (opens the door wearing a robe, but leaves the chain on) Hey, whats up?
Phoebe: Oh wait, one sec. One sec. (Goes to the mirror) Hey you! Behind the glass! Who are you looking at! I've always wanted to say that when I was in one of these rooms, (sees the look on his face) which was never!
Monica: Hey. (Sits down on the arm of the couch.)
Ross: Mom no, come on! Thank you.
Ross: We had such a great time! Shes-shes incredible! I thought the-the age difference might be a problem, but it wasnt. It wasnt at all. Elizabeth is very mature for her age. (Joey makes the international sign for big boobies.) (To Monica) A concept lost on some people!
Mrs. Green: Now dont worry! Everythings gonna be okay. (Hugs Rachel while she is standing and Rachel is sitting, seeing this Monica decides to join in on the hugging by hugging Mrs. Green from behind her back.)
Monica: Okay, hold on a sec.
Phoebe: Hey! Ooh, wow that jacket looks great on you!
Joey: Come on you stupid machine! Come on!
Ross: (on tape) I know. Hey remember remember the night they got engaged? How uh, you and I almost
Rachel: Come on, its not a big deal! We stayed up all night coming up with a plan so that us dating will not be a problem.
Chandler: Oh. (takes the cassette and puts it on his arm like the stop smoking patch, and it falls off.) Nope, that patch is no good. (Joey and Monica both do their fake laughs.)
[Scene: The Semi-Private Labor Room, Dr. Long is checking on Rachel again.]
Rachel: Honey, I don't know how to tell you this, but um, if something were to happen to Ross or to myself <Ross and Rachel knock on wood> um you wouldn't get the baby.
Rachel: Oh come on!!
Ross: Oh what?! Is she gonna cancel on me again?! How can she do this? Doesnt she know its our anniversary?
Chandler: (The room is filled with flowers and a floral print sheet on the bed.) Oh my God. What is th its like a guy never lived in here. Look, youve got to be careful. This girl thing is dangerous. (Looking around the living room.) Its spreading already.
Rachel: Go get back on that case honey!
Estelle: Yeah, what time do you wanna pick me up? (Joey hangs up on her.) Hello?
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey and Phoebe are on the couch as a man enters.]
Chandler: Oh no-no-no. This is amazing. (He goes over and presses a button on a remote control that opens the entertainment center doors revealing the TV.)
[Scene: Room 816, Phoebe is making her move on Cliff.]
Lauren: Ill see you tomorrow. (she kisses him full on the mouth.)
Amy: I don't believe this, hold on a second. You guys die and I don't get your baby?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Mr. and Mrs. Geller are watching tennis on TV, Monica is sitting at the table]
Mackenzie: (at the other end of the line) I don't know... You know what? I'm gonna put you on with my bear. Hold on. (she puts the phone at the bears ear)
[Scene: A grocery store that Janice shops in. Chandler is on purpose, accidentally bumping into her.]
Joey: You hung up on the pizza place? I dont hang up on your friends.
Chandler: And if not, we got to do it on a bucket.
Ross: Man! Did you see the kid on that nose?
Dr. Green: Oh come on! Dont be such a baby! (Goes after him)
Joey: Rach come on, what?
Rachel: Okay, you guys, just relax. (She goes over to open the door, and as she does, she says.) I doooo. (Sees that its Joshua, not Chandler that knocked on the door.)
Ross: No, come on dont start. (they start kissing again) Ouch!
CHANDLER: Your little men are gonna get scored on more times than your sister.
Mr. Geller: Come on!
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Chandlers bachelor party has begun, what there is of it, with only Joey (wearing a gold paper top hat) and Chandler (wearing what appears to be a Burger King paper crown) enjoying a nice product placement of Budweisers on ice.]
Monica: Okay, all right, I think youre great, I think youre sweet, and youre smart, and I love you. But you will always be the guy who peed on me.
Ross: I'll do it. Hey, whatever you need me to do, I'm your man. (He starts to sit down on the bed. There's one problem though, he's about two feet to the left of it. Needless to say, he misses and falls on his butt.) (Looking up at Joey.) Whoa-oh-whoa! Are you, are you okay?
Chandler: Your parents caught Ross smoking pot in college and he blamed it on me!
Chandler: Joey, you have to tell her whats going on! And what did it look like?!
(Theres a knock on the door and the Nurse enters carrying Emma.)
Ross: (on tape) Yeah. (Pause) Anyway umm, it probably worked out for the best.
[Scene: Central Perk, Rachel is on the couch as Ross enters.]
Chandler: I'm sorry, he's a little bit wound up, we had to stop at every maple candy stand on the way here.
Rachel: (goes over and hits her head on the post) Look at that! (repeats) Look at that! (repeats) We all do it. (repeats) Okay, Im stopping now.
Chandler: Did you have a crush on me, when you first met me?
Ms. McKenna: Are you on board?
Monica: Okay. Could the waiters gather around to hear tonights specials? Okay, first there is a Chilean Sea Bass prepared with a Mango relish on a bagWhy is nobody writing these down?
Rachel: Shes totally right! When we were together, you got all freaked out about Mark and there was nothing going on.
Ross: Why dont we talk about this on the way to the hospital?
Monica: Whats going on?
Joey: I know Im having the worst time. There was a 15-minute line for the buffet, and when I finally got up to the plates, I slipped on a giant booger!
Rachel: I'm on the phone! (On the phone) Dr. Wiener? (Ross and Rachel walk away)
Mrs. Green: Plus, what are you planning on doing with the baby while youre trotting out to the garbage ten times a day?
Rachel: (On the phone) Excuse me? Oh yeah? Well, up yours too! (Hangs up)