words in movies
Ross: Anyway, suddenly I'm down field, and I realise that I'm the one who's supposed to catch him, right? Only I know there is no way I'm gonna get there in time, so I am running, and running, and that, that is when I woke up. See I, I am so not ready to be a father.
Chandler: Hey, you're gonna be fine. You're one of the most caring, most responsible men in North America. You're gonna make a great dad.
Joey: Oh, have either one of you guys ever been to the Rainbow Room? Is it real expensive?
Monica: Well maybe we can make a, a, a 'B' out of one of those roses.
Mr. Geller: I tell you one thing, I wouldn't mind having a piece of this sun-dried tomato business. Five years ago, if somebody had said to me, here's a tomato that looks like a prune, I'd say "get out of my office!"
Dr. Mitchell: (on the phone) Monica and Rachel's apartment. Err yeh, aayah, yeh, just one second... (handing it to Monica) ..ah, Rachel, it's your dad.
Monica: We forgot to sign one of the admissions forms.
[Scene: Riff's, Phoebe is entering. Ursula returns with two plates of chicken, but she only has time to set one on the table, when...]
Monica: (as Rachel) Um, okay. You just called a little while ago about needing a signature on the admissions form. Well, it turns out we need a whole new one (little laugh) because uh, you see, I-I, I put the wrong name again. (Little laugh) 'cause um...
Chandler: Say your son never feels connected to you, as one. Say all of his relationships are affected by this.
MRS GREEN: If you didn't pour the coffee, no one would have anything to drink.
Joey: Oh, yknow what? Since Im here, I think Im gonna have me a little beer on the port side. (Grabs and opens one.)
Ross: Okay, so I'm gonna be the only one standing there alone when the ball drops?
MONICA: There's only one.
MONICA: You need one too?
Ross: Getting it away from me would be job one.
Phoebe: No, and so there's no one to walk me down the aisle and... well, I would just really love it if you would do it.
MR A: Oh, wait, I remember, she also said she wanted to sleep with me one last time.
RICHARD: Ok, just one more point.
Chandler: There's no-one around. Why don't we just take this one?
Phoebe: Well, but thats what he was for me. And she you know, kind of stole him away, and then... broke his heart... and then he wouldnt even talk to me any more. Because he said he didnt wanna be around... anything that looked like either one of us.
Phoebe: Okay Ive got one for you, if you had too which one would you rather eat, a seeing eye dog or a talking gorilla?
Melissa: Oh, isnt a shame when one girl ruins it for the whole bunch? (Phoebe agrees by grunting.)
Phoebe: Are you kidding? Im like the one who talked him into it. I like to think of myself as the puppet master of the group.
(from 1.09 - "The One Where Underdog Gets Away")
Ross: No, no I don't, because it's being restrung, somebody was supposed to bring me one.
Joey: (to the dog) Cmere. Hey. Cmere. Thats Rachel. Shes the one who used to live here. Might as well be honest with youwe love her. But we cant have her. I really miss her. Well, hey, you understand, right? Youre a guy. (thinks about it and picks up the dog and looks) Well, you used to be.
Ross: Im sorry, its just one of my last nights together before she leaves for campto be a counselor!
Chandler: I know, just quick-quick question, quick question. Which one was Deep Impact and which one was Armageddon?
Joey: (joins him) I gotta get one, too.
Phoebe: Oh, this is so intense. One side of my butt is totally asleep, and the other side has no idea.
(Needless to say, Phoebe is stunned into silence. And one audience member gasps.)
[Scene: Bill and Colleen's apartment. Chandler comes running into the living room. Monica is the only one there.]
Janine: Sure, listen I was gonna order some pizza, you wanna share one?
[Scene: Interview room. Ross and two other professors (one man, one woman) are sitting on one side of a long desk. Benjamin Hobart is sitting on the other side]
FRANK: Yeah, he loved stilts. One time I was upstairs, I was stealing cigarettes out of my mom's purse, and uh, all of a sudden I look over and there's my dad's head bobbing past the window. He just had this big smile on his face and he was waving 'cause he was always happiest when he was on his stilts.
Rachel: I cannot believe that after ten years, you do not know ONE thing about me.
MONICA: Wow, that is a surprise. Just one little question, uh, why not Ross's room?
EDDIE: That's a tomato. This one definitely goes in the display.
Ross: No! For all I know, shes trying to find me but couldnt because I kept moving around. No, from now on, Im staying in one place. (He sits down on the bed.) Right here.
[Scene: The apartment in the listing, the guys are checking it out. There's one problem though, it's roughly the size of this computer screen. As they enter Joey lets out a whistle.]
PHOEBE: No, that's my stepdad. My real dad's the one that ran out on us before I was born.
Ross: (coming in) I'm dead and no one cares?
Rachel: Hmm, mild discomfort. So I take it youve had one of these Braxton thingies?
Joey: Whoa, whoa, whoa, Monica, what're you doin'? This is a poker game. You can't serve food with more than one syllable. It's gotta be like chips, or dip, or pretz...(look of realization)
ROSS: Did you see me write one down?
Joey: Well. I guess you think youre pretty special huh? Sittin up here in your fancy small hall building. Makin stars jump through hoops for ya, huh? Well yknow what? (Throws the script away) This is one star whos hoop This is a star that the hoopthis hoopI was Dr. Drake Remoray!
Rachel: I know. I always thought if you and I got married, it would be the one that stuck. And it wouldnt be a secret, and we wouldnt have our wedding dinner at Pizza Hut. (They both laugh.)
Monica: Lewis Posin! He was my best friend in fifth grade, and-and then one day I asked him to be my boyfriend and he said no. Do you know why?
MONICA: Alright, well tell me one of yours.
Joey: Ah, I'm gonna be one of his helpers. It's just such a slap in the face, y'know?
Phoebe: You mean the one that my grandmother made me swear on her deathbed that I would never let out of our family?
Ross: Alright, alright. We're all adults here, there's only one way to resolve this. Since you saw her boobies, I think, uh, you're gonna have to show her your peepee.
Chandler: Here! (Hands him one. Joey adds it up and discovers that he was right.)
Chandler: There is not one hair on that head.
Joey: Will you pick one, just pick one! Here, how about that one? (points to a table)
Mr. Franklin: (laughs) Thats a good one. (Walks away.)
Rachel: Come on you gotta have one!
Ross: Joey comeI cant believeI bring you here to see the Bapstein-King comet, one of natures most spectacular phenomenon, and all you care about are bugs stuck in tar and-and some woman!
Chandler: That sounds like my first bike. (They all turn and look at him.) My dad gave me his old one.
[Cut to later, they are finishing up the pizza, theres one piece left.]
CHAN: One. . . two. . . two and a half. OK, just show me one of them.
Ross: Thats, thats, thats a big candy bar. (Shes holding one of those huge Toblerone bars.) I had the most amazing time with you.
Ross: Just, just, just pick one!
Ross: Okay, (gets the money) so, do you make the pizzas in one of those uh, wood-burning ovens?
Ross: We are never gonna find him! Hes one guy in a huge city!
Ross: Okay here, have one of these peppers. Oh ha Oh God! So so hot! (Rubs his eyes.) Oh my(Laughs.) By the way, you dont want to touch the pepper and then touch your eye.
Rachel: Joey no, this is wrong! You have to take it back, okay? You dont want to win an award this way. Youre very talented. And someday youre gonna win one of these for real and that one is gonna mean something.
Ross: Ben, you ready? All right, gimme your foot. Ok, on three, Ben. One, two, three. Ok, That's it, Ben.
Monica: Hey. Its three in the morning. They dont know that Ive come home yet. You notice how neither one of them are wondering where I am.
Monica: If we wanna get on camera, I think we have to get up on one of those platforms. Theyve been taping those people up there all day.
Chandler: Okay, one question.
Ross: No no no, believe me. No one has been waiting for this as much as I have, ok? And you know what the funny thing is? When this day is over, you get to go home with the baby, ok? Where does that leave me?
Ross: All right, all right. You-you-you know what I'm going to do? I am going to order another pizza and when Caitlin gets here, you-you--I will show how well I flirt. Yeah! I will, I will get her phone number! (To Chandler) And not the one on the menu!
Chandler: You mean there's more than one of us.
Chandler: (to Joey) One more game?
Joey: Pheebs! Wait up! (She stops.) Listen uh, close your eyes. (She does so and Joey passionately kisses her.) Maybe thats one thing you can cross off your list.
Rachel: Well umm, that one is pretty but uh, I just, I just love this fabric (On the other one.) Sorry.
Phoebe: Y'know, for once, I am going to sit down and try to watch one of these things. (just as she sits down).
[Scene: Monica and Phoebe's class; the class has ended and Phoebe is talking to one of her classmates.]
[The next one is from Episode 712: The One Where Theyre Up All Night, Joey and Ross are deciding how to climb down the final part of the fire escape.]
MONICA: Oh, why does this bother me so much? I mean I don't wanna be one of those people who tells their boyfriend they wanna spend 24 hours a day with them.
Phoebe: Well look, if I wanted to see a fireman, I would date one. Okay? (she drags him away)
(He shifts on the couch and a ripping sound emanates from his lower regions, the sound reminds one of a brief explosion of gas. In other words, it sounds like he farted. She has a look of horrific wonderment, wondering "Did he just fart?")
Joey: Oh really? Well, maybe you and I go out for drinks? (Pause) Youre the other one right? (She thinks about it for a second and nods yes.)
Chandler: Okay, on three. One....Two....
Chandler: Okay, one...two...
Frank: You-you work at one of those massage parlors?
Joey: Okay, all right, whew! What do you say we all clear out of here and let these two lovebirds get back down to business? (Ross turns and glares at him.) Hey-hey-hey, I-I-I'm just talking here, he-he's the one doing your sister.
Guy: One more chance Ursula, please?
Ross: I don't know, I'm one sorry polentologist. (Stops reading.) All right Joey, we get it. (To Chandler) I'm sorry.
Frank Jr.: You just don't know how hard it is, Phoebe. There's just so many of them. You know, two I can handle. Two's great. You just hold one in each hand, but what do I do when the third one runs at me with his bike helmet on. I've got no more hands to protect my area! There's three of them, Phoebe, three!
RACHEL: Ok, I, I will do your laundry for one month.
Monica: If you would stop thinking about Ross for one minute you would notice that there are great guys everywhere! I mean, look! Look, Gunther! (Gunther turns to listen in.) I mean, he's nice, he's cute.
Emily: Well, that me. (They kiss again.) Here, have this. (She gives him the candy bar.) Im only allowed one piece of carryon anyway. (She starts towards the jetway.)
{Transcibers note: Ill finish that one for those of you who dont know what theyre talking about. Where the towels are Hers and Hers and His, Threes Company too! Yeah, thats the theme song for Threes Company.}
CHAN: Does anyone have one from a different paper? Ross, read yours.
ERICA: No, seriously. These hands. These miracle, magical, life-giving hands. Oh, just to be near them, touch them, maybe even lick one?
Rachel: I also said number one.
[Cut to Ross leaping into Chandlers Hotel room in London in The One With Rosss Wedding.]
JOEY: Oh yeah yeah. I process. People want the processing, I'm the one they call.
Chandler: Okay, Im not gonna have one.
PHOEBE: Well, I'm not gonna be the only one who's not getting paid.
Chandler: Look you have to realize I dont think of you as a thin, beautiful woman. (Monica glares at him.) See this is one of things that I can apologize for later! Look, what I mean is youre Monica! Okay? And I am in love with Monica.
(Rachel rips off another one, revealing another hole. Rachel then moves onto a third one, but this one doesnt have a hole underneath it.)
Phoebe: (on phone) Hello? (Listens) Yes, Im the one who found your phone.
[Scene: A hall on the floor where Chandler works. Chandler and Phoebe enters, and overhears some employees's conversation. One of them is doing Chandler.]
Janice: Good-bye Chandler Bing. (walks out with one shoe)
The Casting Director: Terrific! Well uh, theres one more thing. Uhh, uh its really important to the director that everything in this movie is authentic. Yeah and so in your love scene with Sarah she talks about how shes never seen a naked man who wasnt Jewish. So (Laughs.)
GRANDMOTHER: Oh, sure, yeah. [gets a box with the pictures] This is the one of you father in a meadow, and, uh, helping a little boy fly a kite, and here he is at a graduation. . . another graduation. . . another graduation.