words in movies
Monica: Oh, and the people are so nice. There's this one guy, Geoffrey, he's the Maitre D., Chandler, you will love him. He is without a doubt, the funniest guy I have ever met. (Chandler, who was almost asleep again, sits up straight in bed in an instant and can't believe what he just heard.)
Phoebe: I know! (Phoebe picks up a little packet of sugar, shakes it, and then realises she can't open it with one hand, but doesn't want to let go of Mike's hand. She tries to tear open the packet with one hand.)
Prospective nanny: Oh, you know, wait. I do have one question. (she starts playing with her hair) Do you guys do random drug testing?
Ross: Oh, come on Rach, we will. I promise. We have more interviews (They sit down and Rachel sighs) And worse comes to worse, we can always reconsider the uhm... the first one we met with.
Rachel: So wh..? He's smart, he's qualified. Give me one good reason we shouldn't try him out.
Phoebe: Well... but David, just... I just want you to know that... that... you know... telling you this... is one of the hardest things I've ever had to do.
David: ...it's uhm... i-it's two on each cheek and uhm... and one on the lips.
Monica: Honey, you know I think you're hilarious! Come on, you know that joke you told me last week? The one about Jerry Lewis and the girl with the lazy eye...? (he laughs) That slayed me.
Ross: Well, you know what... I-I'm sorry I'm the only one who isn't in love with Gary Poppins out there... But I just... I can't... I can't go through with this.
Rachel: Well, you're the one who wants to fire him, so you're gonna have to do it. (Ross walks to the living room determined to fire Sandy)
Sandy/Grumpus: And what's the one kind of boat that can never, ever sink?
[The next one is from Episode 722: The One With Chandlers Dad.]
[The next one is from Episode 605: The One With Joey's Porsche.]
Joey: Hey, youre the one that loves the picture.
Chandler: All right. I'll tell you what. When we're 40, if neither one of us are married, what do you say you and I get together and have one?
Rachel: No one! They are my friends, I wouldnt punch any of them.
Joey: This one right here. (Ross whines.)
Rachel: (interrupting him) Hi! Im gal pal Rachel Green, and if you want the dirt, Im the one you come too. This might be Joeys baby (rubbing her stomach), who knows? Im just kiddingSeriously, (leans into the cassette recorder Shelley is using) gal pal Rachel Green.
Monica: Umm, so how long have you been working with your dad? (He looks at her) Come on, one of us had to mention him.
[Flashback to when Chandler was introduced to Monica in The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks.]
Joey: (makes a sound like a monkey) That noise can only me one thing.
Joey: Okay, pick a card, any card. (Monica picks one) All right, now memorize it. Show to everybody. Got it?
Monica: Uh, Chandler did! What does he want you to give up? Phoebe: A bunch of stuff. And the worst one... he wants me to get rid of Gladys.
Rachel: My due date is in one week!
Phoebe: Oh, oh, but y'know, you always see these really beautiful women with these really nothing guys, you could be one of those guys.
Rachel: (stopping him) Oh, wait Ross! Im sorry, one more thing!
Monica: Joey, you know you dont actually have one.
Chandler: 99...100! Ready or not, here I come! (He opens his eyes and sees that the chick and the duck are still sitting in front of him) All right, let's go over the concept one more time.
PHOEBE: Well, 'cause, I mean, what if, what if he's not this great dad guy? I mean, what if, what if he's just still the dirtbag who ran out on my mom and us? You know what? I've already lost a fake dad this week and I don't think I'm ready to lose a real one.
(Monica picks up one of those boxes of hair curling things, dumps it in a box, and storms out.)
Rachel: You like that? (She climbs on the barcalounger seductively, putting her knees next to Joey's hips.) Let's take this into high gear (She pulls the barcalounger lever and seat reclines. She puts one of her knees between his legs and begins to kiss his neck.)
Ross: Just one thing umm
Mr. Waltham: Well theres one (pointing towards Jack) and theres another (pointing towards Judy).
Phoebe: I did it! One mile on a hippity-hop! Thats it!! Thats everything I wanted to do before I was thirty. Oh, except I wanted to patch things up with my sister. But oh well. Yay!! (They all cheer again.) And-and girls this thing is a Godsend if you know what I mean. (Rachel and Monica look intrigued and as they all head into Central Perk, Rachel picks up the hippity-hop that Phoebe left behind.)
Phoebe: Mon, maybe one of these guys wants to wear your dress.
Phoebe: One hundred thousand dollars!
Phoebe: You didn't bring one! My cab's downstairs, I'll drive you to the airport.
Monica: Im actually with her on this one.
Chandler: Oh, I figured you guys would all be mad at me. So I got you some gifts that I found on the side of the road. (Looks into the bag.) Who wants the teddy bear with one leg?
Phoebe: (on phone) 'Right, well look, um, if Joey loses this audition, that is it for Estelle. I don't care! Annie you are a doll, what time can you see him?' (to Monica) I need a pen. (Chandler hands her one, but she needs something to right on, so she tilts Chandler's head over and writes on the back of his neck)
(They hug and then kiss one more time.)
Phoebe: Oh wait, one sec. One sec. (Goes to the mirror) Hey you! Behind the glass! Who are you looking at! I've always wanted to say that when I was in one of these rooms, (sees the look on his face) which was never!
Ross: Hey, both you guys should be up there with me. I mean, you two are-are my I mean, Im lucky to have just one good (They all start getting emotional.)
(The dog returns with a ball that looks exactly like the same one Joey has.)
Joey: Hey I got one! I got one!
Woman: Oooh, that sounded like a bad one.
Monica: It is in the living room where there is also a light! And no one will kick you in the shin.
Monica: Spoon? (Hands him one and he tastes it.) So, what do you think?
Rachel: Come on Joey, I just bought you a new chair! The most expensive one in the store! Hey, yknow what I was thinking? We could name her Francette.
Joey: What was the other one Ross?
Mr. Geller: (filming this) Hey Chandler, you cant keep your hands off her for one second!
[The next one is from Episode 608: The One With Rosss Teeth, Chandler is accusing Joey of becoming less of a man.]
Chandler: Then, I might as well � (grabs the cigarettes) do this (lights one, exhales). Not really sure what to do now.
[Cut to Monica and Chandler's, The One With George Stephanopoulos, Phoebe is showing Monica and Rachel that she brought Operation to their slumber party.]
Phoebe: Embryossss? As in, "More than one?"
Joey: I saw this movie once where there was a door and no one knew what was behind it, and when they finally got it open millions and millions and millions of bugs came pouring out and they feasted on human flesh. Yknow it wouldnt kill ya to respect your wifes privacy! (He walks away and into his apartment and looks the door.) Stupid closet full of bugs!
Ross: I went thru this with Ben and Carol. One cup of coffee won't affect your milk.
Joey: Look, which one of us is gonna be having sex in there, me or you?
Monica: No! No, no... wait! We didn't lose. (turns to Chandler) The rules clearly stated that the last one to cross the finish line was the loser. Well, our dog never crossed the finish line, so technically...
Monica: Yeah, but Im the only one related by blood.
Dr. Green: Well what if somebody steals something? How are you gonna run after him with one leg shorter than the other?!
Rachel: Well, there is one thing that we havent tried, but someone thinks that, (mimicking Ross) "That will open up a can of worms."
Phoebe: Yeah I know. Isnt it great? One less person we have to make small talk with.
[The next one is from Episode 204: The One With Phoebes Husband, when everyone including Julie is watching Joey in his porno.]
JOEY: I don't know, I was kinda hopin' no one would ever find out.
Monica: Nobody cares about the Dakotas. (Thats true in so many ways, trust me, Ive lived in one and been to the other.)
Ross: So, did he get on one knee, did he have a speech prepared, or (in a tender way) did he cry? (the guys look at him) Yeah, big surprise, I like proposals!
Chandler: Well, you can't just not see Rachel anymore, she's one of your best friends.
(Ross gets up and starts to hop on one leg.)
(They start wrestling, only they are unable to move either ones arm despite a huge strain on their faces and a cheering crowd.)
Julie: Oh honey, I think Im having one too!
Joey: What about me, he? Only had one lunch today.
Phoebe: One really does have a stick up one�s ass. Doesn�t one?
Rachel: I mean what if this keeps happening? Y'know, they'll-they'll be outside smoking, making all the decisions and I'll just be up in my office breathing my stupid clean air, y'know? And then when the day comes when Kim wants to promote one of us, who do you think she's gonna pick? Me or Smokey Smokerson?
Joey: One guest? You told me I can have six tickets!
Joey: (to the camera) Hello, Im Joey Tribbiani! Lets play Bamboozled! Erin, you get the first question! In hockey, who is known as The Great One?
Rachel: Chandler, I gotta tell you, I love your mom's books! I love her books! I cannot get on a plane without one! I mean, this is so cool!
[Scene: The beach house, the next morning. Ross is passed out on the kitchen counter. He wakes up with a start and has one of the pages of the letter stuck to his face.]
Chandler: So.. let me get this straight. So my two friends die, I get Emma. Then my wife dies, then Emma the one tiny ray of hope left in my life gets taken away from me?
Phoebe: No thanks, I have a good one too. I just, I, I cant see him.
Chandler: Well, why dont you check in one of my saddlebags while I chew on a bale of hay!
Ursula: Right, okay, the one that lives in Montuak, umm-hmm.
Phoebe: Well, you know what Chandler? I think you've gotta face it. You're like, the guy in the big office, you know. You're the one that hires them, that fires them... They still say you're a great boss.
Melanie: I don't know, I-I guess I just had you pegged as one of those guys who're always 'me, me, me.' But you... you're a giver. You're like the most generous man I ever met. I mean... you're practically a woman.
Monica: Look, when it started I was just trying to be nice to her because she was my brother's girlfriend. And then, one thing led to another and, before I knew it, we were...shopping.
Joey: Oh hey, no, you're not welcome. Okay, look, I hate this! You guys keep embarrassing me! (To Monica) Yesterday, Rachel found your razor in our bathroom and I didn't know what to say, so I said it was mine and-and that I was playing a woman in a play. And one thing led to another and (He puts his leg on the chair and pulls up his pants leg to reveal that he now has shaved legs.)
MIKE: Ah?� (pause)� Do you have one here?
MONICA: Because. . .� one of them is for you.
[Scene: The Gellers' kitchen. Monica, Mrs. Geller and one of Mrs. Geller's friends are preparing the cake.]
Monica: One!
Chandler: Okay, one thing at a time. (They run out to get married.)
[Scene: Rachels Room, Joey moves Rosss coat to get the tissues Rachel wants and the engagement ring box Mrs. Geller gave him falls out of the pocket it was inside. Joey goes to one knee, picks up the box, opens it, and sees that its an engagement ring.]
Ross: I know, I know! When I was here for Holidays on Ice (Joey looks around worried hoping no one heard that) I was sitting so far away Michelle Kwan couldn't read my banner!
Phoebe: Could you-could you umm, give us one second?
[Another set of flashbacks begin with Episode 521: The One With The Ball, Joey and Ross are throwing a ball around.]
Kate: Yes. Are you one of the retarded cousins?
Rachel: What Phoebe? Wait! One time he caught me smoking he said if he ever saw me doing that again hed make me eat the entire pack.
[The next flashback is from The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line. He's telling Joey that he kissed Cathy.]
913 - The One Where Monica Sings
Rachel: Okay, but if it only happened that one time, how come we found your underwear in our apartment the other day?
Chandler: You called everyone and said you were having trouble finding a Santa costume, so I borrowed one from a guy at work!
Gavin: One of the best, ma'am, one of the best...
Joey: Oh yeah, yeah! He's done tons of commercials. I've seen him in like Sugar Smacks, Playstation, and that one for the phone company. In fact he was so good in that one, he actually convinced me to switch phone companies. Chandler was mad .
(He tries to move in front of the class, only goes out of control and rolls into the hall, catching himself on the doorway with his pointer. He then pulls himself back into the room with the pointer, only he jams one end of it between the door frame and the door and breaks the pointer in half.)
Phoebe: You know, you are talking about one of my dear, dear friends.
JOEY: Hey, I'll be alright. I mean it's not like I'm starting from sqare one. I was Dr. Drake Remoray on Days of Our Lives. Heh? I mean that's gotta have some kind of cache.
Monica: Two guys in one night? Wow, I thought she became a slut after she got her nose fixed.
Joey: Come on, please, it'll be just this one more, well actually it's two.
Dr. Long: taking a long walk, and then theres the one thats proved most effective: sex.
Rachel: Yeah, I think she wants the old one back.
Janice: Oh my God. You listen to me, Chandler, you listen to me. One of these times is just gonna be your last chance with me. (She runs off)