words in movies
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's apartment. Joey is there as Phoebe enters.]
Phoebe: Hey.
Phoebe: What you got?
Phoebe: Goodie! Thanks. So, how is it living with Rachel again? I mean, apart from the great food.
Phoebe: Oh my god, Rachel asked me if I knew anyone for her too.
Phoebe: I don't know. They're so perfect for each other; it's crazy.
Phoebe: I just wish they'd realise they should be together.
Phoebe: I know. They should be a family. They should get married and have more children.
Phoebe: You know what? Maybe once they start dating, and they see what's out there, they'll realise how good they are for each other.
Phoebe: So, what are we gonna do? Are we just gonna go ahead and set them up with people?
Phoebe: Yeah. (BEAT) Oh, I know what we can do. We could set Ross and Rachel up on horrible dates, so that they'll realise how good they are together.
Phoebe: Yeah, you know what the best part of it is? I get to do my "plan-laugh." (A maniacal laugh follows.)
Rachel: Well, Phoebe set me up on a date.
[Scene: Central Perk. Joey is drinking coffee by the counter as Phoebe enters.]
Phoebe: Ooh, Joey.
Phoebe: Hey. I'm so excited; I just set up Rachel with the worst guy tonight.
Phoebe: Well, it's this guy I used to massage. And by massage, I mean hold down so he wouldn't turn over and flash me.
Phoebe: Oh, yeah.
Phoebe: A teacher?
Phoebe: Well, Ross does. What... You're - you're ruining the plan! Joey, you've - you've fixed him up with his perfect woman!
Phoebe: Yeah.
Phoebe: How do you even know a woman like that?
Phoebe: Joey.
Phoebe: So now what do we do?
Phoebe: What if we don't find him somebody else? We'll just tell her the date's off, but we don't tell Ross, and he goes to the restaurant and gets stood up!
Phoebe: Ooh, so this is great! Rachel's gonna have a terrible date, Ross gets stood up, and then they'll realise how good they have it together.
Phoebe: It's not Santa's plan. No, it's... (Laughs the real "plan-laugh.")
Phoebe: No, I think we killed it.
Rachel: Well, come on, Steve; let's not rule out nervous laughter. Hey, now wait a minute. Phoebe told me that - that you owned your own restaurant. That's impressive.
[Scene: Central Perk. Phoebe and Joey are there. Phoebe's cell phone rings.]
Phoebe: Hello?
Rachel: Phoebe, it's me. I'm going to hunt you down and kill you!
Phoebe: Hey, Rach!
Phoebe: You know, you are talking about one of my dear, dear friends.
Phoebe: Oh, right, so he gets a little crazy when he's stoned.
Phoebe: Did he go out for a cigarette?
Phoebe: My dear, sweet Rach.
Phoebe (to Joey): Well, our plan is working. Rachel is having a miserable time, and Ross is just stood up somewhere at a restaurant all alone.
Phoebe: By the time anyone's figured out what we've done, we'll be in sunny Mexico. (BEAT) Oh, wait, that's the end of a different plan.
[Cut to outside. Phoebe and Joey are walking down the street to Central Perk.]
Phoebe: Now, wait a minute. So, they're gonna name their first child Joey?
Phoebe: How - how do I get them to name the next one after me?
Phoebe: Oh, so they owe me like, three Phoebes.
(Phoebe sees Rachel and Ross through the window.)
Phoebe: Oh my god! Look, it's Ross and Rachel. Oh, the plan is working.
Phoebe: Don't, don't do the plan-laugh.
Rachel: Oh. Huh. You know, it is weird that Phoebe would set me up on a date that was awful on the same night that Joey set you up on a date that didn't even show.
Phoebe: Oh, yeah, they're falling in love all over again.
(Rachel and Ross turn around and look at Phoebe and Joey with puzzled expressions on their faces.)
Phoebe: Oh, they see us! Oh, they, they look mad. Oh, they figured it out. They're coming this way. Run!
Phoebe: Mexico!
Phoebe: What else do they add smell too?
Phoebe: Yeah but why didn't you just say that you didn't read the book?!
Monica: Okay, Phoebe you know what youre doing right?
Phoebe: I-I-I found it interesting.
Phoebe: Oh, come on Will! Just take off your shirt and tell us!
Phoebe: Embryossss? As in, "More than one?"
Phoebe: Oh no!
Phoebe: Definitely!
Ross: (To Phoebe) And she's supposed to buy this?!
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe is singing a new song. Yep, the first new Phoebe song of season six, Ross, Joey, and Rachel are also there.]
Phoebe: Oh, then no.
Phoebe: Uh-huh!
Phoebe: No-no, let me in!
Phoebe: Good thats a good one. Okay, Monica, anything? Yknow? Does Rachel move the phone pen?
Joey: But you can't stay with Phoebe, Ross! We're-we're roomies!
Phoebe: God, what a mess. (She grabs the bowl and heads for Monicas.)
[The video is a very dramatic episode with an obviously dubbed voice for Phoebe. Everyone watches in disbeliefe]
Phoebe: But I already gave them back to you!
Phoebe: What?!
Phoebe: Yeah. Salt, so your life always has flavor.
Phoebe: Of course we can. Congratulations. (they hug, but Joey shakes his head.) Yay! (she gestures Joey to come and join in) Joey...
PHOEBE: C'mon, happy family gets a dog, frontier fun.
Ross: Uh-huh. (Phoebe grunts.)
Phoebe: Me too! Oh! Did you ever see An Officer and a Gentleman?
Monica: Phoebe, listen. You were with me, and we were shopping all day.
Phoebe: Hi!
Phoebe: My God, Joey!
PHOEBE: (laughing) Oh my God, you look so good!
Gary: (To Phoebe) So you wanna get some dinner?
Phoebe: Oh, they love your casserole.
Phoebe: Okay!
Phoebe: I suppose I could tell her it's just all my fault.
Phoebe: Bye!
PHOEBE: OK, is this really my father?
Phoebe: Dont feel too sorry for me. At least my boyfriend isnt gay.
Rachel: (entering) Hi. (To Phoebe) Hey, hi! So uh, Frank and Alice wanted me to tell you that they're still outside making phone calls.
Phoebe: I'm sorry, Frank. I didn't realise things were so bad. You know, I'll help out more. I can - I can babysit any time you want. You name the day, and I'll be there.
Phoebe: Which you just gave up really quickly.
Phoebe: Well, its just that maternity clothes are so expensive.
Phoebe: Yes. Well, that's neither here nor there.
Phoebe: Lilly's dead. (He looks up in shock.)
Phoebe: See? Vegetarianism benefits everyone.
Phoebe: Oh, I was telling them about you and Emily. Y'know, try to get some sympathy.
Phoebe: (sees a little kid playing with a race car bed) (to kid) Hi. Y'know in England this car would be on the other side of the store. (the kid just stares at her, and she makes the that went right over your head motion) Woo!
Phoebe: I'm fine, thanks.
Phoebe: Nope. (Chandler nods in agreement.)
(Monica leaves and Chandler moves to talk to Phoebe.)
Phoebe: Okay. Bye!
Phoebe: What?! Really?!
Phoebe: I can't believe this!
Phoebe: So, what movie should we see?
Monica: Relax! It's Phoebe! Not you!
Phoebe: Okay, so we got some more good rejections, lots of stuff to work on.
Phoebe: All right y'know what, nevermind! Everyone wants to have a green one! Im sorry, Im sorry, I didnt mean to get so emotional, I guess its just the holidays, its hard.
Phoebe: That sucks! That's not a trip! I just came from the park! What are we gonna high five about at the stupid Central Park? "Well, it's right by my house, all right!"
Monica: You know everything!! Oh wait, double or nothing. I bet you the baby is over seven pounds. (Phoebe isnt interested.) I bet you it has hair. (Shes still not interested.) I bet you its a girl.
Phoebe: Oh no, none of them are the father. The father is my brother.
Phoebe: Ooh, it's not a toy.
Ross: Oh please! (He sits down.) (To Phoebe) Youre gonna say things now, arent ya?
Phoebe: Oh, I don't know. I mean it was fun one time.
Phoebe: What?!
Phoebe: Yeah?
Phoebe: Uh-hmm.
Phoebe: Hmm, did you talk to Gary about the moving in thing?
Phoebe: Yeah?
Gary: Phoebe?
Phoebe: Uh-huh! (They hug.) I'm so happy. (She's not happy.)
Phoebe: Which is why my answer is yes!
Monica: This is Monica! I'm Phoebe's friend. Listen, Phoebe is back with David and he's going to propose to her, and she is going to say "yes" but I know she really wants to be with you!
Ross: Yeah. (He does so and Phoebe hugs him.)
Phoebe: Yep. Put more gas in.
Phoebe: Well, you're not more excited than I am! No way! I'm the most excited!
Phoebe and Gary: (entering) Hey!
(Phoebe closes the door behind him.)
Phoebe: Yeah.
Phoebe: Oh! Okay, that actually makes more sense. So how was it?
Phoebe: No, nothing.
Phoebe: Uh-huh!
Phoebe: Umm, yeah! Today's.
Gary: Phoebe
Phoebe: Yeah?
Jason: Y'know Phoebe, Im gonna make this real easy for you. (walks out)
Phoebe: That's so sweet.
Phoebe: Okay. Okay! Well okay, who do we know thats coming? Me. Are you?
Phoebe: Living with you would make me happy.
Gary: Phoebe, you don't have to say that.
Monica: They're all in there! Even these five that I hid in my bra (takes some tickets out of her bra and gives them to Phoebe)...
[Scene: Central Perk, everyone except Phoebe is there. Bonnie is telling them of her sex-capades.]
(Luisa nods, but then Monica and Phoebe run in)
Phoebe: Yeah, okay, listen, umm, Mom, I hope you know you still mean a lot to me. And youre welcome to come back anytime.
Phoebe: Wow. So then did you make it with beef or Eggplant?
Phoebe: (entering) Oh good, you're all up.
Rachel: Phoebe, are you okay?
Phoebe: Oh yeah, that's over.
Phoebe: Yeah!
Phoebe: Well, I'm kinda on a clock here.
Phoebe: (smiling) Maybe your scene's coming up?
Phoebe: Bye!
Phoebe: You wanna be on my list too? Keep talking! Has anyone seem my list by the way?
Phoebe: Yeah, but Jason's really sensitive.