words in movies
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's apartment. Joey is there as Phoebe enters.]
Phoebe: Hey.
Phoebe: What you got?
Phoebe: Goodie! Thanks. So, how is it living with Rachel again? I mean, apart from the great food.
Phoebe: Oh my god, Rachel asked me if I knew anyone for her too.
Phoebe: I don't know. They're so perfect for each other; it's crazy.
Phoebe: I just wish they'd realise they should be together.
Phoebe: I know. They should be a family. They should get married and have more children.
Phoebe: You know what? Maybe once they start dating, and they see what's out there, they'll realise how good they are for each other.
Phoebe: So, what are we gonna do? Are we just gonna go ahead and set them up with people?
Phoebe: Yeah. (BEAT) Oh, I know what we can do. We could set Ross and Rachel up on horrible dates, so that they'll realise how good they are together.
Phoebe: Yeah, you know what the best part of it is? I get to do my "plan-laugh." (A maniacal laugh follows.)
Rachel: Well, Phoebe set me up on a date.
[Scene: Central Perk. Joey is drinking coffee by the counter as Phoebe enters.]
Phoebe: Ooh, Joey.
Phoebe: Hey. I'm so excited; I just set up Rachel with the worst guy tonight.
Phoebe: Well, it's this guy I used to massage. And by massage, I mean hold down so he wouldn't turn over and flash me.
Phoebe: Oh, yeah.
Phoebe: A teacher?
Phoebe: Well, Ross does. What... You're - you're ruining the plan! Joey, you've - you've fixed him up with his perfect woman!
Phoebe: Yeah.
Phoebe: How do you even know a woman like that?
Phoebe: Joey.
Phoebe: So now what do we do?
Phoebe: What if we don't find him somebody else? We'll just tell her the date's off, but we don't tell Ross, and he goes to the restaurant and gets stood up!
Phoebe: Ooh, so this is great! Rachel's gonna have a terrible date, Ross gets stood up, and then they'll realise how good they have it together.
Phoebe: It's not Santa's plan. No, it's... (Laughs the real "plan-laugh.")
Phoebe: No, I think we killed it.
Rachel: Well, come on, Steve; let's not rule out nervous laughter. Hey, now wait a minute. Phoebe told me that - that you owned your own restaurant. That's impressive.
[Scene: Central Perk. Phoebe and Joey are there. Phoebe's cell phone rings.]
Phoebe: Hello?
Rachel: Phoebe, it's me. I'm going to hunt you down and kill you!
Phoebe: Hey, Rach!
Phoebe: You know, you are talking about one of my dear, dear friends.
Phoebe: Oh, right, so he gets a little crazy when he's stoned.
Phoebe: Did he go out for a cigarette?
Phoebe: My dear, sweet Rach.
Phoebe (to Joey): Well, our plan is working. Rachel is having a miserable time, and Ross is just stood up somewhere at a restaurant all alone.
Phoebe: By the time anyone's figured out what we've done, we'll be in sunny Mexico. (BEAT) Oh, wait, that's the end of a different plan.
[Cut to outside. Phoebe and Joey are walking down the street to Central Perk.]
Phoebe: Now, wait a minute. So, they're gonna name their first child Joey?
Phoebe: How - how do I get them to name the next one after me?
Phoebe: Oh, so they owe me like, three Phoebes.
(Phoebe sees Rachel and Ross through the window.)
Phoebe: Oh my god! Look, it's Ross and Rachel. Oh, the plan is working.
Phoebe: Don't, don't do the plan-laugh.
Rachel: Oh. Huh. You know, it is weird that Phoebe would set me up on a date that was awful on the same night that Joey set you up on a date that didn't even show.
Phoebe: Oh, yeah, they're falling in love all over again.
(Rachel and Ross turn around and look at Phoebe and Joey with puzzled expressions on their faces.)
Phoebe: Oh, they see us! Oh, they, they look mad. Oh, they figured it out. They're coming this way. Run!
Phoebe: Mexico!
Phoebe: Well, I heard youre having a problem with one of the boys in your class. And so I thought I would just come down here and sit you both down, have a little talk and make it all okay. Now umm, the boys name is Stings son.
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's erm, Monica and Rachel's, Monica, Joey, and Chandler are sitting and talking as Phoebe and Rachel enter.]
Phoebe: So, what did Rachel say when you told her you were still married to her?
Phoebe: What do you mean, comforted her?
Phoebe: For your information, this happens to be a pain like no man will ever experience.
Phoebe: Well lets just hope it works. Yknow nine out of ten marriages end in divorce?
Phoebe: Yeah, Professor and Mrs.
Phoebe: Oh! Yeah, yknow you and Ross are still married.
Phoebe: Just kidding!
Phoebe: Ah-ha! A classic sign of love, the hug!
Rachel: Ah, Paolo, this is Phoebe.
[Scene: Central Perk. Phoebe and Joey are sitting on the couch.]
Phoebe: All right, well, I just can't think about that right now. I just wanna say good-bye to my Grandma.
Phoebe: Thats all right, thats well, I figured.... (they start to leave as Joey enters.)
Phoebe: Wow! I didn't see that coming! You're-you're asking me out!
Phoebe: (To Ross) Saved your ass.
Phoebe: Hi.
Phoebe: Well, you know that psychic I see?
Monica: Phoebe thats crazy!
[Scene: Phoebes cab, Phoebe and Joey are driving back. Phoebe is driving while Joey is sleeping.]
Phoebe: Get your foot off my contestant! Judge!
Phoebe: Im just saying, this woman, I mean shes fictitious. No?
Phoebe: (to Bonnie) Well I hope you have fun tonight.
Phoebe: Ohh! (She moves.) Oh my. Oh, that reminds me, I have to see my OB-GYN today.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel is sitting in the living room and Phoebe is standing in the kitchen as the phone rings.]
Phoebe: No-No! You need your sleep. Night-night! Shh! (She closes the partition.)
Rachel: Monica, can Phoebe borrow your green dress?
Phoebe: Hey!
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe is there as Monica enters.]
Phoebe: Wow! I didnt know you guys actually used those.
[Scene: Central Perk, Rachel is sitting at a table and Phoebe is on the couch. Chandler and Monica can be seen outside, shes lecturing him, and pushes him inside. He then nods to Rachel, and is obviously counting off the seconds in his head and then Monica makes a grand enterance.]
Phoebe: You cant give up on your dream.
Phoebe: Really? It doesn't have anything coming out of it. Or maybe there is some place for her in your bedroom?
PHOEBE: You guys. I'm sorry about your shopping.
Phoebe: I dont believe you! That is brilliant! And Monica has no idea?
(Phoebe enters.)
PHOEBE: Ok, this is the most romantic disease I've ever had.
Phoebe: Hey!
Phoebe: (reading the slip of paper) Wow! (In a sultry voice) Hello, Mr. Chandler.
Phoebe: Whats going on?
Phoebe: Hey! Maybe youll die!
Phoebe: Monica slow down! Ok? I'm just excited to be living with him. You know I mean, I don't know, Can I see someday being married to Mike? Sure! Yeah. Y'know..I can picture myself walking down the aisle in a wedding dress that highlights my breasts in an obvious yet classy way. But do I want that house in Connecticut...you know..near the good schools where Mike and I can send Sophie and Mike Junior.. Oh my god I do.
Phoebe: Oh, howd that happen?
Phoebe: Thats short for Phoebe?! I thought that was just what we called each other!
Phoebe: (entering) Hey!
Phoebe: Oh yes. Yes. Yeahno. She did. She left you umm, (looking in her purse) this lipstick.
Phoebe: Bamn! There you go! Huh?
Phoebe: Then Im gonna have to ask you to keep it down. (slams the door in his face.)
Phoebe: Oh-ho yeah! A song with rhyming words. Oo, I never thought of that before.
[Scene: Outside Room 816, Joey is briefing Phoebe on Cliff.]
Phoebe: Yeah, come to papa.
Phoebe: Yeah, but they didn't ask me! Y'know? This way I'm just y'know, the exotic, generous stranger. That's always fun to be.
Phoebe: Uhm... You know, once we're in the air and the captain turns off the seatbelt sign... you feel free to roam about my cabin...
Phoebe: Hey!
Phoebe: I have to tell you this story. Okay, I was coming over here and this driver
Joey: Oh, thats, uh, thats Phoebes friends dog. I dont know what his real name is, but I call him Mozzarella.
[Cut to the hallway, Phoebe is outside getting some last minute instructions from Rachel.]
Ross: Phoebe, I told her you already knew.
Phoebe: Well, maybe you wouldnt have had you (turns to the attendant) run in the chapel!
Phoebe: Yeah!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Phoebe is entering with Rachel.]
Phoebe: Joey and my friend were out last night and having dinner and she reaches over and takes a few of his fries...
Phoebe: Well, if you're having a hard time, you should talk to my friends, Bill and Colleen. They adopted a kid. I'm sure they'd help you.
[Scene: A Street, Phoebe and Lizzie are at a hot dog vendor.]
Phoebe: Hey!
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe, Rachel, Monica, and Joey are there.]
Phoebe: What?!
Phoebe: Oh, I can still do that.
Phoebe: How did that happen?!!
Chandler: Be-cause, we were talking about ways that he could beat Mike and I told him that Phoebe wanted to get married.
Phoebe: Yeah? (Checking the final diaper) Well this is not what I ordered.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, continued from earlier, Monica is telling Phoebe where everything is.]
Phoebe: Im pretty sure its gun.
Phoebe: What?! What-what-what-what-what?!!
Phoebe: Were just celebrating that Joey got his health insurance back.
Phoebe: I did it! I took care of the babies all by myself!
Phoebe: Well, if you don't... if you don't hold it in, you don't get all the nutrients.
Phoebe: I know, the babies are asleep.
Phoebe: Oh weird, Chandler just told us he's got a conference there!
Phoebe: (screaming) Ahhh!! Chandler and Monica!! Chandler and Monica!!
Phoebe: What? Wha-wha-wha-did you do ROSS!
PHOEBE: Oh. Mine does. (singing) Stephanie knows all the chords. (makes a face)
Ross: Oh well, since I have that whole history with Rachel, I guess Phoebe.
Phoebe: So is Joey going to have to give up the apartment?
Phoebe: And also, my birthday.
Phoebe: Well, I think that shirt makes you look like you should work at a Baskin Robbins... Anyway... Hey, isn't Joey's agent Estelle Leonard?
Phoebe: Well, what youre wearing is fine for that.
Phoebe: Thats right.
Phoebe: I have plans.
Phoebe: Okay.
Phoebe: Not yet, no. (Drops his hand and moves back.)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica and Phoebe are cooking, Chandler is reading a magazine.]
Phoebe: Yeah. Yeah, I remember trying to steal a cardboard cutout of Evander Holyfield from a Foot Locker.
Phoebe: Come on, theres gotta be something.
Phoebe: Um, that's ok! (throws it in fire) Ok. All right. Now we need the semen of a righteous man.
(She sits back defeated, and Phoebe groans with disgust.)
Phoebe: Very good handshake, good wrist action.
Phoebe: Save it Red! Unless you wanna spend the night in the slammer, you apologize to the tree.
Phoebe: Hey! I call her!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Joey is entering, Phoebe is already there waiting for the delievery guy.]