words in movies
[Scene: Outside Central Perk, Rachel and Phoebe are helping Monica learn how to roller skate by rolling her between themselves.]
Phoebe: Oh my God, they took my idea!
Phoebe: Yeah! Okay, here you go. (rolls her back to Rachel)
Phoebe: Oh my God, are you guys okay?
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Chandler is talking to Phoebe about her suggestion.]
Phoebe: Umm, oh, about three months.
Phoebe: Whoa-whoa-whoa, you guys, do you know anything about chicks?
Phoebe: Okay, well they are a huge responsibility, especially at this age. They require constant care. They-they need just the right food, and lots and lots of love.
Phoebe: (to Pete) Wow! Thats exciting, you went to Japan, made up a woman.
Phoebe: Im just saying, this woman, I mean shes fictitious. No?
Phoebe: Cause youre still into Monica. So you told her there was somebody else so she would agree to work with you, so cause you figure oh if you spent a lot of time together, maybe something might happen, and...
Phoebe: Yeah, no, Im fairly intuitive and psychic. Its a substantial gift.
Phoebe: Absolutely, oh I promise. Tell her what?
Phoebe: No Im serious. I mean Im intuitive, but my memory sucks.
[Scene: Central Perk, Monica is entering, Phoebe is already there.]
Phoebe: Hey!
Phoebe: What?
Phoebe: Ohh, Monica, I am so excited for you.
Phoebe: Ooh, I have to tell you something.
Phoebe: But I cant tell you.
Phoebe: Well, sure in a perfect world. But, no, I promised I wouldnt tell, and I swore to like all my gods.
Phoebe: No.
Phoebe: No.
Phoebe: No, but lets come back to that later!
[Scene: Central Perk, Monica is trying to find out what Phoebe wont tell her.]
Phoebe: Noo!
Phoebe: Oh, wait, wait. Clogs, or claws?
Phoebe: No.
Phoebe: No.
Phoebe: (Shaking her head yes) No!
Phoebe: I dont know! (frantically points at Monica)
Monica: Okay, I feel like Im talking to Lassie. All right, Phoebe would you just tell me!
Phoebe: I cant!!
Phoebe: I, but youre so close! No!
Phoebe: Oh, just go. Youre never gonna get it!
Phoebe: I know, it's tough. You know what the first thing I did after my mother's funeral was?
Phoebe: Well, just... let's try it again.
Phoebe: Oh!
Phoebe: Hi!
Phoebe: It does, really?
Phoebe: Uh. It's not... quite what I'm saying.
Monica: I want you to meet someone really special. Phoebe, this is Erica. And this is the baby!
Phoebe: Yea. Can I please, please, please talk to one of the best men? This is going to be the last time I promise.
Ross: Okay, well here we are. Now were in a tough spot again, Rach. What do you want to do? How do you want to handle it? Huh? Do you wanna fight for us? Or, do you wanna bail? (sits down next to her) Look, I, (on the verge of tears) I did a terrible, stupid, stupid thing. Okay? And Im sorry, I wish I could take it back, but I cant. (We see Monica and Phoebe are almost in tears.) I just cant see us throwing away something we know is so damn good. Rachel, I love you so much.
Phoebe: Je m'appelle Claude.
Phoebe: pelle
Phoebe: pelle
Phoebe: Je m'appelle!
Phoebe: Okay, umm, if a kid gets straight As, his parents would say, "Yeah, he pulled a Monica." Y'know? Or a fireman saves a baby, and they go, "Yeah I know, he pulled a Monica." Or someone hits a homerun and the announcer says, "Yeah, that ones outta here." Though some things dont change.
(Phoebe enters)
Phoebe: Hey Joey.
Phoebe: Well, you're not, (she tries to smile and contain her anger, but loses it) You're not... you're not... again, you're not SPEAKING FRENCH!
Phoebe: Really, can I hear some of it.
Phoebe: I think David would probably wanna hear a few lectures.
Phoebe: Yeah, okay, Ive-Ive been dating both of you, and its been really horrible. Cause y'know its been a lot of fun, for me. Umm, but I-I like you both, and I, and I didnt know how to chose, so... Im sorry, Im just, Im terrible, Im a terrible person. Im terrible.
Monica: Why? Because everything is my responsibility? Isn't it enough that I'm making Thanksgiving dinner for everyone? You know, everyone wants a different kind of potatoes, so I'm making different kinds of potatoes. Does anybody care what kind of potatoes I want? Nooooo, no, no! (starting to cry) Just as long as Phoebe gets her peas and onions, and Mario gets his tots, and it's my first Thanksgiving, and it's all burned, and, and I... I...
Phoebe: How could you possibly think that?
Phoebe: How old is your phonebook?
PHOEBE: It was an accident, and, and the woman who did this would never ever hurt a dog on purpose. She's a vegetarian.
Phoebe: Ooh, this is it! (Looks in the window.) Oh, thats him! Thats him!
Joey: (to Phoebe) Oh-hoh! Ha-hah! See!
Phoebe: Umm, I lost one of your earrings. I'm sorry! I am so, so sorry!
Phoebe: Horseback riding?
Phoebe: Ready... GO!
Phoebe: Archery?
Phoebe: Oh! Yeah, this is fun, couples night.
Phoebe: (checking her watch) You did it!
Phoebe: Wow!
Phoebe: Oh, what beautiful lukewarm sentiment.
Phoebe: Thanks! Honey, would you want me to take your name?
[Scene: Central Perk. Phoebe, Monica and Chandler on their couch.]
Phoebe: Where did you go to do it?
Mike: (walks to the couch with coffee for Phoebe) Here you go.
Phoebe: Okay!
(Phoebe tries to throw some quarters out the window, but she has forgotten to open the window, and she and Ross scream.)
Phoebe: Good for you. That was really mature.
Phoebe: Why? The only person my playing is bothering is you!
Monica: (pause) (to Phoebe) Chandler gets pedicures!
Phoebe: (genuinely excited about it) Yeah, yeah! And you can get rid of that French poster.
Phoebe: Okay.
Phoebe: Uh-huh!
Phoebe: Well, not anything, I mean...
Phoebe: Hey!
Monica: Phoebe!
Phoebe: Uh! Princess Consuela.
Phoebe: Oh, this could take a while.
[Scene: Central Perk. Chandler and Monica are there when Phoebe enters.]
PHOEBE: I'm just gonna pass on the concert, 'cause I'm just not in a very Hootie place right now.
Phoebe: Ross...
Phoebe: Can you?
Phoebe: Oh God!
Phoebe: Oh, yeah, happy needless-turkey-murder day.
Phoebe: (hopping off the bike) Wait! This seat is really uncomfortable! Yeah, maybe before we start we should just get another one. Perhaps, like an airplane seator a beanbag chair!
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe is there as Rachel enters carrying a shopping bag.]
Phoebe: (slowly) Je m'appelle Claude.
Phoebe: Oh, me too!
Phoebe: Yep.
Phoebe: Welcome back!
Phoebe: Nope.
Mike: Hey (He kisses Phoebe)
Rachel: That-that is your make out buddy. Dont you recognize him? (Holding up the magazine in front of her face.) Oh wait. Ohh, Phoebe I love you. Kiss me please.
Phoebe: You're not serious, right?
Phoebe:(not amused) Mike Crap Bag?
Phoebe: Great, okay, what are you gonna change it to?
Phoebe: And I love Crap.
Phoebe: Okay (walks out and closes the door behind her, looks up and whispers) If you guys have microphones in there too, I didn't mean any of that. I love you.
Chandler: Uh-huh, and I got all the top ten scores, I erased Phoebe off the board! High five! (Holds up his hand to give Monica a high five, only he cant straighten his fingers.)
[Scene: Phoebe and Rachel at the Spa. Phoebe is still massaging Rachel]
Monica: Phoebe, we are so proud of you! You're amazing!
Phoebe: Shhh! Shhhh! Joeys asleep.
Phoebe: Yeah.
Phoebe: Thank you, mister Bag.
(a woman enters and recognizes Phoebe)
[Scene: Central Perk. Phoebe and Mike are leaving.]
Phoebe: How about uhm... How about Buffay-Hannigan?
Phoebe: ...Oh crap!
Mike: Only if you'll be Phoebe Buffay.
Phoebe: It's a funny word.
Ross: Phoebe, I had no idea you were so conventional.
Phoebe: Im sorry, Im justIm Im just not ready for a relationship right now.
Phoebe: Good for you!
Phoebe: Ooh, what's going on?
Phoebe: Talking to Ross.
Phoebe: You okay with this?
Phoebe: She died.
Phoebe: (to Monica) Here, now I don't eat chicken, so it's just noodle soup. And there's no chicken in the broth either, so it's really just... noodle water.
Phoebe: Yeah, she was just an agent.
Phoebe: Well, not for a little while. Let's just give him a few days to get used to everything else.
Phoebe: Is it okay if I leave this stuff here 'til Rachel's birthday party?
Phoebe: Well its justits one of those situations that I just hate. Yknow? A massage client gave me three tickets to the Helmet-Pelts exhibit at the Morgan Chase museum.
Joey: Hey Phoebe.
Phoebe: Hey. Everything ok?
Phoebe: (interrupting) What are you doing?!! Why are you defending him?! Just get me another doctor! One who is not crazy and who is not Fonzie!
Phoebe: Because a promise between friends means never having to give a reason. (she leaves)
Monica: Damnit Phoebe! How did you even call him?