words in movies
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Phoebe is at the sink and Chandler is looking at a ring brochure.]
Phoebe: Now, have you told anyone else?
Phoebe: You told me.
Phoebe: Yeah well, once again not knocking pays off. I only wish you hadnt been on the toilet.
Phoebe: Hey! So Chandler, wanna go to the coffeehouse?
Phoebe: Yeah, coffeehouse.
(Joey returns with a piece of pizza as Chandler and Phoebe exit.)
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe and Rachel are sitting on the couch.]
Phoebe: So how are things going with Paul?
Phoebe: Thats easy! You just have to think of him as a-as a jar of pickles that wont open.
Phoebe: No thats what you do when you want to get the truth out of someone.
Phoebe: (To Rachel) Watch this.
Rachel: (To Phoebe) Okay.
Phoebe: Hi Paul!
Paul: Hi Phoebe.
Phoebe: So how are things going with you?
(Phoebe turns to Rachel and mimes remove a lid of a jar. Ross enters and Paul motions for Rachel to leave with him now.)
Phoebe: Yeah! That was so weird, huh?
Ross: Phoebe, whyd you do it?
Phoebe: I didnt do it! It was Chandler! Hes Hes mad at you!
Phoebe: Please, I think you know why.
Phoebe: Come on Ross, youre a paleontologist, dig a little deeper.
Phoebe: Do you think thats something that hed be mad at you for?
Phoebe: Well then I think thats it.
Phoebe: Oh, if thats what you want you then you really should run his head under hot water and bang his head against a table.
[Scene: A Jewelry Shop, Chandler and Phoebe are looking at engagement rings.]
Phoebe: Okay, so maybe you dont get her a ring. Maybe you-maybe you do something different. Yknow? Maybe you get her an engagement bracelet, yknow? Or an engagement tiara? Orooh! An engagement Revolutionary War musket! (Picks one up from the display in the corner.
Phoebe: Huh? Can you just imagine getting down on one knee and handing her this gorgeous piece of weaponry?
Phoebe: (coming over after returning the musket) Wait a minute, no, this is, this is the reason you brought me. Okay? I know how to haggle. So let me handle this from here on out.
Phoebe: Or not, whatever.
Phoebe: Chandler, I-I will handle this! (To the jeweler) How much is it?
Phoebe: We will give you $10.
Phoebe: We stand firm at $10.
Chandler: Uh, credit card. (Reaches for it then realizes) Oh no! No-no, but I left my credit card with Joey. (To Phoebe) Okay, Ill go get it. You guard the ring.
Phoebe: Okay. (To the jeweler) Listen, Im sorry about before. Do you have anything her for $10.
Phoebe: Ill give you $1 for them.
Ross: Hey, remember how Chandler and Phoebe blew us off yesterday?
[Scene: The Jewelry Store, Phoebe is busy trying on virtually everything in the store. Shes got earrings, rings, bracelets, and enough necklaces to put Mr. T to shame on.]
Phoebe: Okay umm, Id also like to try on the tiara. (The male jeweler hands it to her.) Oh yeah. Okay. (Puts it on.) (To the jeweler) What do you think, too much?
Phoebe: Okay. Then, take the tiara back and let me hold the musket again. (He hands it to her and Phoebe poses in front of one of those small mirrors.) Somethings missing. Its not Okay oh, let me see the ring my friend picked out.
Phoebe: Oh my God!! (She runs after him, but sets of the security system, which locks the stores door and brings down a set of bars behind her, caging her in.) No! What?! Help me! Let me out! Now! (Points the musket at them.)
[Scene: The Jewelry Store, Chandler is entering with his credit card and Phoebe is holding out another ring for him.]
Phoebe: Chandler, I found the perfect ring. (Holding it out for her.)
Phoebe: Oh my God Chandler, the one you picked is gone. Its over!
Phoebe: Some guy bought it. Im sorry. I tired to stop it but they (points to the jeweler) put me in jail!
Phoebe: The little jail between the doors!
Chandler: Phoebe, I asked you to guard the ring!
Phoebe: I know, Im sorry! But yknow, this ring is better! Monica never even saw the other ring.
Phoebe: Maybe it was the guy.
Phoebe: (entering from her room) Hey.
Phoebe: Its not a stupid gumball machine looking ring! Its a beautiful ring!
Phoebe: Okay. There may be a way that we can get the other ring back. Cause I heard the guy tell the jeweler where he was going to propose. So maybe we can get him to trade rings or something.
Phoebe: Well you certainly cant give her that stupid gumball ring.
[Scene: A Restaurant, Chandler and Phoebe are entering. This is the place where the guy who bought Chandlers ring is going to propose.]
Phoebe: There he is! (Points.)
Phoebe: Wow! Youre good! After this, we should solve crimes.
Phoebe: Oh, okay. (Walks over to him.) Excuse me sir? Could you come with me please? You have a phone call.
Phoebe: It is your office.
Phoebe: John?
Phoebe: (To Chandler) Here he is.
Phoebe: Wow! I would trade.
Chandler: No-no! This is my fiancee (Phoebe) and her heart was set on that ring. You dont want to break her heart now do you?
Phoebe: Yeah, do you want to break a dying womans heart?
(Phoebe coughs.)
Phoebe: Yes, and it is my dying wish to have that ring. See, if Im not buried with that ring then my spirit is going to wander the nether world for all eternity
Phoebe: (entering) Hi.
Phoebe: What?
Phoebe: Oh I know, I helped pick out the ring.
[Scene: Central Perk, everyone is there. Ross working on crossword puzzle, starts humming theme from The Odd Couple. Chandler joins in, followed by Monica and Phoebe, then the whole gang. Ross starts humming theme from I Dream Of Jeannie.]
Phoebe: Umm, well hes very dashing, y'know, and umm, very, very sophisticated, and he doesnt speak any English, but according to his translator, he totally gets me.
PHOEBE: Wow, look at these prices.
Phoebe: Chuck Woolery?
RACHEL: But what about Phoebe?
Phoebe: And call me!
Frank: (entering with his fianc�e Alice, who is obviously much, much older than he is) Hey! Hey! This is ah, my fianc�e, Mrs. Knight. (he points out Phoebe to her)
PHOEBE: Yeah, ok. You probably did everything you could.
PHOEBE: Really?
Phoebe: Oh, yeah. Ok, thank you.
(Joey gives him the okay symbol, and Ross rushes towards him to be stopped by Chandler. Meanwhile, Phoebe goes over to the snack table as some guy, which turns out to be Ursula's fianc�e Eric, walks in and smacks her butt.)
Phoebe: What else?
Phoebe: Hello handsome. (Sees Ursula over her shoulder) Oh God. (Walks away in shame as they kiss.) Oh look at you two. So when did you guys meet?
Phoebe: (just Phoebe) No, answer his.
MIKE: All right.� I'll do it.� (Phoebe gives the thumbs-up sign to Rachel.)� But really, how much dirtier can it get?
PHOEBE: Oh yeah, so you know D?
Phoebe: Wait! Oh wait! (she takes off a ring that was already on her left ring finger. After that Mike starts to kneel again, but then...) Oh no! (She was wearing rings on all her fingers and her thumb, and takes all of these off.)
Ursula: (disgusted) Hang on. (She goes into her apartment and slams the door in Phoebes face.)
Phoebe: Oh, I missed you so much! (she kisses Mike)
PHOEBE: (singing/screaming) You're all invited to bite me!
Phoebe: Ok, you guys, I don’t mean to make things worse, but umm, I don’t want to live with Rachel anymore.
PHOEBE: Oh, hi.
PHOEBE: Thank you.
PHOEBE: Really? From who?
PHOEBE: Yeah. Here you go.
Phoebe: Uh, only if you have the hiccups too. Yeah, the pictures are for you, the water and the chocolate is for me. I just didnt feel like getting up. Okay, Im gonna show you a picture of Ross. Okay? And youre going to remember all of the bad things about him. All right? Really focus on his flaws.
Phoebe: Yeah! Oh, c'mere, Marcel! Oh, Marcel, c'mere!
PHOEBE: Better. Yeah.
PHOEBE: You wanna try it again?
PHOEBE: That's too much. Sorry.
Phoebe: Hey you guys! Chandler's coming and he says he has, like, this incredible news, so when he gets here, we could all act like, you know...
[Phoebe enters.]
Phoebe: Yeah! I mean, I don't know. I was just , I was looking, I was looking in his eyes and I was just thinking: Oh my God! It's David. David's here. He's just, he's so irresistible.
Phoebe: Ooh! Ooh! And I brought Operation! But, um, I lost the tweezers, so we can't operate. But we can prep the guy!
Phoebe: Maybe you could be my roommate!
PHOEBE: Mmmm hmmm.
Phoebe: But ifno look, okay. These jerks might not care about you, but the universe does! And that says a lot!
Phoebe: Theres a skylight?! (Runs to see and yells from the bedroom.) Wow!!
Phoebe: Okay, Im going to take him back to Wendys.
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe is there as Joey enters.]
PHOEBE: Ok, do you know A minor?
Phoebe: Yeah, last Saturday. Wow! She was the first black man to fly solo across the Atlantic. (Chandler and Monica look puzzled) Oh, wait a minute, I read the wrong one.
Monica: Phoebe, your face is fine! Come on, none of this stuff is going to happen to you! Stop being such a baby!
Phoebe: Because its Arabian princess day at work! Okay?! Leave me alone!
Phoebe: All right, dont freak out! Okay? I-I will help you. How long before you have to leave?
Phoebe: Eeee!!! Eee!! Eee!!
Ross: (imitating Parker) This room! This night! That waiter! His shoes! I must take a mental picture! (He backs into someone.) Ooh sorry (He looks behind him then notices its Phoebe then stops his impression.)
Phoebe: A dollar?
Phoebe: Really? So she said, she didnt wanna live with me anymore?
Phoebe: I can say I told you so but shes kinda doing that for me.
Phoebe: Okay, but, well, before you say no, my friend Susanne is entering her kid and compared to Emma she's a real dog!
Phoebe: (gasps) Oh, you so would! Oh, you should get that anyway. (They both look at her.) Like for clubbing.
Phoebe: (sings) I can't believe what I'm hearing here...
Phoebe: Come on. It doesn't taste bad.
Phoebe: Hmm, they just dont make em like that anymore!
Phoebe: Why don't you turn them inside ou...
Phoebe: Ooh, is it someone in this building? Is it that tall guy from the first floor?
Phoebe: All right, Ill see you downstairs then.
Phoebe: It's too soon to tell. She's resting, which is a good sign.
Phoebe: (reading from her book) Mon (Pause as she restarts) Marcia and Chester are planning on seeing a movie on Sunday night. Marcia thinks theyre supposed to meet at six, Chester thinks its at seven.
Phoebe: Well, he came in for a massage and everything was fine until... (The flashback shows Paulo lying face down on the massage table and slowly moving his hands up Phoebe's legs and grabbing her butt.)
Phoebe: Well, nobody wants a ghost. But youve got one, because the house is sitting on an ancient Indian burial ground.
Phoebe: Good. It's just so hard, it's hard for me to ... let them go. I guess it just brings back memories, you know, from ... when I gave birth to my brother's triplets and I had to give them up. (Mike is shocked) I haven't told you about that yet, have I?
Phoebe: No, no, he hasn't been around.
Phoebe: Umm Wow, all right. (Checks the book.) Wow! Yay! Ooh, Im gonna meet a guy! And really soon! And hes gonna be the man of my dreams. Probably not the guy I had a dream about last night. (Points at Chandler.)
Phoebe: Look, she only suspects something okay? She doesnt know for sure, so just throw her off the track.
PHOEBE: Hey.
[Phoebe enters.]
GANG: Hey. Hi Phoebe.
PHOEBE: This is my father, this is a picture of my dad.
[Phoebe enters.]
Phoebe: Yeah, not the one I had my eye on.
PHOEBE: Just, you know, to see... um.
PHOEBE: Oh God.
Phoebe: No, no, no, no, no... It's not... it's not... i'ts not as bad as it looks... really. I was just saying goodbye to an old friend.
PHOEBE: Oh.
PHOEBE: [realizes] Oh.
PHOEBE: Hey.
Phoebe: Oh. Okay, well I-I was kinda hoping that I would just be alone yknow to think about my mom and her suicide.
PHOEBE: Yeah, I just don't buy it.
Joey: Hey! Well I hope it goes better than the last time you did it for that girl downstairs, remember? (Phoebe glares at him.)
PHOEBE: Wow, this is it, I'm gonna meet my dad. This is like the biggest thing ever, huh.
Phoebe: Thats it! 25 percent? That means thats its like 75 percent chance of no baby at all!
PHOEBE: Uh-huh.
Phoebe: Oh come on, they can be in the same room.
PHOEBE: OK.
PHOEBE: Mailbox.
Rachel: Phoebe and I saw Chandler with a blonde woman today outside on the street and then we followed them to a house in Westchester.
Phoebe: That man across the street just kicked that pigeon! (Rachel enters.) Oh!
PHOEBE: Yeah?
PHOEBE: You guuuyys.
Phoebe: W-wI justits thatI haveyknow I have-I have an appointment. And its very important.
GANG: Phoebs. [Phoebe leaves]
PHOEBE: Oh! Oh my god. This is so exciting. How much am I gonna get?
PHOEBE: Just from a, from a long time ago. Is he here?
Rachel: Ok. (Phoebe starts to walk in the opposite direction though. Rachel sees and follows her) Wha...? where? Where are you going?
Phoebe: No, no, it's not your fault. You know it's partly my fault, 'cause I made you quit cold turkey. Sorry, no. Okay, well, I mean, I can't date you anymore, 'cause your, you know (in a high pitched voice) Wow! But um, but I will definitely, definitely help you get over my sister. Okay, stalk me for a while. Huh? Yeah, and, and, and, I'll be like an Ursula patch.
[Phoebe and Rachel look uncomfortable.]
Phoebe: No, what's more important, your friends or money?
DUNCAN: I love you Phoebe. [they hug and kiss]