words in movies
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Phoebe is at the sink and Chandler is looking at a ring brochure.]
Phoebe: Now, have you told anyone else?
Phoebe: You told me.
Phoebe: Yeah well, once again not knocking pays off. I only wish you hadnt been on the toilet.
Phoebe: Hey! So Chandler, wanna go to the coffeehouse?
Phoebe: Yeah, coffeehouse.
(Joey returns with a piece of pizza as Chandler and Phoebe exit.)
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe and Rachel are sitting on the couch.]
Phoebe: So how are things going with Paul?
Phoebe: Thats easy! You just have to think of him as a-as a jar of pickles that wont open.
Phoebe: No thats what you do when you want to get the truth out of someone.
Phoebe: (To Rachel) Watch this.
Rachel: (To Phoebe) Okay.
Phoebe: Hi Paul!
Paul: Hi Phoebe.
Phoebe: So how are things going with you?
(Phoebe turns to Rachel and mimes remove a lid of a jar. Ross enters and Paul motions for Rachel to leave with him now.)
Phoebe: Yeah! That was so weird, huh?
Ross: Phoebe, whyd you do it?
Phoebe: I didnt do it! It was Chandler! Hes Hes mad at you!
Phoebe: Please, I think you know why.
Phoebe: Come on Ross, youre a paleontologist, dig a little deeper.
Phoebe: Do you think thats something that hed be mad at you for?
Phoebe: Well then I think thats it.
Phoebe: Oh, if thats what you want you then you really should run his head under hot water and bang his head against a table.
[Scene: A Jewelry Shop, Chandler and Phoebe are looking at engagement rings.]
Phoebe: Okay, so maybe you dont get her a ring. Maybe you-maybe you do something different. Yknow? Maybe you get her an engagement bracelet, yknow? Or an engagement tiara? Orooh! An engagement Revolutionary War musket! (Picks one up from the display in the corner.
Phoebe: Huh? Can you just imagine getting down on one knee and handing her this gorgeous piece of weaponry?
Phoebe: (coming over after returning the musket) Wait a minute, no, this is, this is the reason you brought me. Okay? I know how to haggle. So let me handle this from here on out.
Phoebe: Or not, whatever.
Phoebe: Chandler, I-I will handle this! (To the jeweler) How much is it?
Phoebe: We will give you $10.
Phoebe: We stand firm at $10.
Chandler: Uh, credit card. (Reaches for it then realizes) Oh no! No-no, but I left my credit card with Joey. (To Phoebe) Okay, Ill go get it. You guard the ring.
Phoebe: Okay. (To the jeweler) Listen, Im sorry about before. Do you have anything her for $10.
Phoebe: Ill give you $1 for them.
Ross: Hey, remember how Chandler and Phoebe blew us off yesterday?
[Scene: The Jewelry Store, Phoebe is busy trying on virtually everything in the store. Shes got earrings, rings, bracelets, and enough necklaces to put Mr. T to shame on.]
Phoebe: Okay umm, Id also like to try on the tiara. (The male jeweler hands it to her.) Oh yeah. Okay. (Puts it on.) (To the jeweler) What do you think, too much?
Phoebe: Okay. Then, take the tiara back and let me hold the musket again. (He hands it to her and Phoebe poses in front of one of those small mirrors.) Somethings missing. Its not Okay oh, let me see the ring my friend picked out.
Phoebe: Oh my God!! (She runs after him, but sets of the security system, which locks the stores door and brings down a set of bars behind her, caging her in.) No! What?! Help me! Let me out! Now! (Points the musket at them.)
[Scene: The Jewelry Store, Chandler is entering with his credit card and Phoebe is holding out another ring for him.]
Phoebe: Chandler, I found the perfect ring. (Holding it out for her.)
Phoebe: Oh my God Chandler, the one you picked is gone. Its over!
Phoebe: Some guy bought it. Im sorry. I tired to stop it but they (points to the jeweler) put me in jail!
Phoebe: The little jail between the doors!
Chandler: Phoebe, I asked you to guard the ring!
Phoebe: I know, Im sorry! But yknow, this ring is better! Monica never even saw the other ring.
Phoebe: Maybe it was the guy.
Phoebe: (entering from her room) Hey.
Phoebe: Its not a stupid gumball machine looking ring! Its a beautiful ring!
Phoebe: Okay. There may be a way that we can get the other ring back. Cause I heard the guy tell the jeweler where he was going to propose. So maybe we can get him to trade rings or something.
Phoebe: Well you certainly cant give her that stupid gumball ring.
[Scene: A Restaurant, Chandler and Phoebe are entering. This is the place where the guy who bought Chandlers ring is going to propose.]
Phoebe: There he is! (Points.)
Phoebe: Wow! Youre good! After this, we should solve crimes.
Phoebe: Oh, okay. (Walks over to him.) Excuse me sir? Could you come with me please? You have a phone call.
Phoebe: It is your office.
Phoebe: John?
Phoebe: (To Chandler) Here he is.
Phoebe: Wow! I would trade.
Chandler: No-no! This is my fiancee (Phoebe) and her heart was set on that ring. You dont want to break her heart now do you?
Phoebe: Yeah, do you want to break a dying womans heart?
(Phoebe coughs.)
Phoebe: Yes, and it is my dying wish to have that ring. See, if Im not buried with that ring then my spirit is going to wander the nether world for all eternity
Phoebe: (entering) Hi.
Phoebe: What?
Phoebe: Oh I know, I helped pick out the ring.
Phoebe: Well, you were wrong, he doesnt like me!
(Phoebe enters the bathroom)
Ross: And if you wait right here, Ill go get Ross. (Phoebe grabs his arm and prevents him from escaping.)
Phoebe: Whoa-whoa-whoa! No drinks near the bucket! Set it down over there and then you can make a contribution! (The guy starts to walk away with a hurt look on his face.) And you can leave the hurt bunny look over there too! (Her boss and a co-worker walk up.) Hi Bob! (The same old lady from before walks bye.) (To the old lady.) I thought I told you to get outta here!
Phoebe: Were in the bathroom!
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Phoebe is still writing in her book, Chandler and Monica are in the kitchen as Joey enters.]
Rachel: Hello! (Listens) Oh yeah! Hey! Hold on a second she's right here! (To Phoebe) It's Chandler.
Phoebe: Oh.
Phoebe: Okay.
Phoebe: Oh are you and Chandler
Phoebe: So do you want to hang out or something?
Monica: Phoebe, I can explain!
Phoebe: Okay. Do you guys want me to play for you?
Phoebe: Well, I left my guitar here again.
Phoebe: Yeah. Yeah, thats what you need a good pill.
Phoebe: Oh, it has a name?
Monica: Well umm, I was thinking that maybe we could come up with a system where we trade of being maid of honor for each other. Like hypothetically, if Phoebe were mine
Phoebe: You told me you hate massages!
Monica: Phoebe, dont get upset!
Phoebe: How could it not be? I mean pretty soon theyre gonna be having kids, and then theyre just gonna be hanging out with other couples who have kids. And then maybe theyre gonna have to leave the city to be near a Volvo dealership.
Phoebe: Potato, potaato.
Monica: Nice! Wow Phoebe you are good!
Phoebe: Thats right, you just enjoy.
Monica: Ah no, the other Phoebe, the one you went to go see.
Phoebe: (getting uncomfortable) Okay.
Phoebe: Yeah, and-and leaving us to go see hot dancer girls is not very Thanksgivingy.
Phoebe: Hey.
Phoebe: Oh, you make sex noises when you get massaged!
Phoebe: I mean $500.
Phoebe: 600.
Phoebe: No-no, I got that.
Phoebe: Yes.
Message: (Phoebe's voice) "Hello. Th-this is the pigeon from the balcony calling to apologise" (they all turns to look at Phoebe) "I sh.. I shouldn't have knocked the tickets out of the pretty lady's hand. It-it was all my fault. Not hers. Bye. Coo."
Phoebe: Yeah, okay. Hey, wait. Do you know what kind of birth control she was using?
Phoebe: Ross, please! My make-up! (He walks away angrily.)
Phoebe: Is it me, or is veto starting to sound really good?
Monica: Uh Phoebe?
Phoebe: Thats it. Just relax.
Phoebe: Come on more!
Phoebe: Yeah, you like that dont you?
Phoebe: You want it there? You take it there baby!
Phoebe: Okay.
Phoebe: Oh! Hey, Rach!
Phoebe: Oh, you, too.
Phoebe: (sits down next to her and hugs her) Oh no.
Phoebe: Ugh. Come on, Mona, dont kiss ass.
Phoebe: All right. Oh! Shoot! Oh shoot! Uh, Rachel wanted to see this tape!
Phoebe: Oh, Monica, grow up!
Phoebe and Monica: (sympathetic) Ohh!
Phoebe: Umm, well I sorta have some bad news, can I come in?
(Phoebe goes into the hall and brings a dog inside!)
Phoebe: Give her a key to your apartment.
Phoebe: All right, well I just wanted to say thank you though for diverting Kyles ex.
Phoebe: Thats all right, Ill work here. This is goo, next to this plant. (She picks a place in the lobby next to a plant.)
Ross: Really?! (To Rachel) Hey, yknow what? Since you have such a great sense of what I need, uh ooh, heres-heres 60 bucks, why dont you take Phoebe down to that Colonial flea market of yours and get me some stuff.
Phoebe: How could you not tell Mona that Rachel is living with you?
The Teacher: Right. Are you looking for Jacks parents to discuss the problems hes having with Ben? (Phoebe nods Yes.) Yeah. Because I really do think the parents should sit down and have a conversation.
Phoebe: (entering) Hey!
Phoebe: What stuff?
(Joey follows Phoebe into the kitchen)
Phoebe: Will you excuse us, we need to talk for a moment.
Phoebe: She was acting, she was pretending like she hasnt heard from him on years, but I found this picture on her fridge, and look (shows Monica)! Isnt this what he would look like now?
Phoebe: (To Rachel) Okay, you have to switch with me! Monica is driving me crazy!
Phoebe: Yeah! Here! (She grabs a deck out of her purse) Oh no, these are the trick deck. Okay. Here yes. Okay.
Phoebe: You know, if you tilt your head to the left, and relax your eyes, it kinda looks like an old potato.
Joey: Maybe that's okay. You know? Maybe, maybe it is better this way? I mean, now, now you can move on. I mean, you've been trying to for so long, maybe now that you're on different continents.. (Looks at Phoebe) Right?
Phoebe: Never mind. But it was going to be really good.
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Joey, Chandler, and Phoebe are there as Ross enters.]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Chandler and Monica and Rachel and Phoebe are planning their respective strategies to break the other pairing. Joey is not amused.
Tim: (walks behind Phoebe) Hi! (And startles her.)
Phoebe: Oh, I thought this was your party and it turns out its a party for Howard. He's just the sweetest little man! (A guest walks up to her.)
Phoebe: Okay, good.
Phoebe: (entering) Oh hey you guys!
Rachel: (To Phoebe) Well, whats he like?!
Phoebe: Well hes tall.
Phoebe: This is completely normal, around the fourth month your hormones start going crazy.
Phoebe: He works with food!
Phoebe: Well last night, I met Monicas.
Phoebe: Obviously, and hes British.
Phoebe: (after he's gone) I am so sorry you got caught in the middle of that. I didn't mean to be so out there. I am furious with him!
Phoebe: Hmm, something bad to tell Rachel Bad news for Rachel, what could that be?!
Phoebe: Oh! Hi!
Phoebe: Umm, Chandler, Monica, this is Don.
Phoebe: (cough talks) Soul mate.
Chandler: (mouths to Phoebe) What?
Don: Thats exactly what I said. Phoebe, isnt that strange.
Phoebe: Okay. Would you rather live in the shirt pocket of a sweaty giant, or inside his shower drain?
Chandler: Buy stamps, pick up dry cleaning Dont let Phoebe in.
Phoebe: Yeah?
PHOEBE: Yeah? Are you sure, really. [She picks up a mirror and sees the white splotches all over her face.]
Monica: (returning) Phoebe, good work.
Phoebe: Dont worry, well find you someone else.
Phoebe: Yeah, I like Vince a lot, y'know? But, its just Jasons so sensitive, y'know? And in the long run, I think sensitive its just better than having just like a really, really, really nice (pause) butt. (Her eyes glaze over thinking about the butt.) (pause) Jason! Definitely Jason! Okay, wish me luck!
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe and Chandler are watching Monica and Don talk.]
Phoebe: Im so sorry.
Phoebe: And then for forgetting to invite you to it.
Chandler: Phoebe thinks you and Don are soul mates, and I dont believe in that kind of stuff. But then you two totally get along. So look, I wont stand in your way if you want to run off with Don and live in a house of cheese.
Joey: Yknow what? Dont worry about it, you still got me and Phoebe.
Eric: (simultaneously as Phoebe) Oh no! Oh no! Oh no! Oh no! No! No! No!
Phoebe: Ive got friends too. Okay, bye.