words in movies
[Scene: Central Perk. Rachel is getting a cup of coffee as Joey and Phoebe enter and sit down.]
Rachel: Hi! Hey, Happy Valentines Day!
Rachel: Its good. Except he makes us watch the Discovery Channel all day long. Did you know that something really boring happened to someone really ugly in the Middle Ages? (to the waitress handing her a cup of coffee) Oh, thank you. Ill see you guys later.
(Rachel exits with coffee)
Phoebe: So, how does Mona feel about you and Rachel living together?
Phoebe: All right. Oh! Shoot! Oh shoot! Uh, Rachel wanted to see this tape!
Rachel: (entering) Hi.
Rachel: I accidentally packed these with my stuff. (looks at the dog and gasps) Who is this?
Rachel: (talking with a higher voice, and puckered lips kind of like you do to a baby or...well a puppy its hard to explain. Just use your imagination!) Oh, well, you are so cute! I wish I could play with you more, but Ive got to go to work! I hope I stop talking like this before my marketing meeting, yes I do. Yes I do. (still talking like that) Bye-bye, Joey. Oh, I seriously cant stop it. (exits)
Joey: (to the dog) Cmere. Hey. Cmere. Thats Rachel. Shes the one who used to live here. Might as well be honest with youwe love her. But we cant have her. I really miss her. Well, hey, you understand, right? Youre a guy. (thinks about it and picks up the dog and looks) Well, you used to be.
Ross: Yeah, Im missing out on all this other stuff, too. So, Joey suggested Rachel move in with me.
Phoebe: How could you not tell Mona that Rachel is living with you?
Joey: Rachel stuff.
[Scene: Ross and Rachels I guess I have to call it that now. Rachel is reading on the couch as Ross enters.]
Rachel: Oh, Ive got big Valentines plans! Ive got my Chinese food on the way, and the rest of your saltwater taffy!
Rachel: Ross, we actually watched the documentary together.
Rachel: Ooh! My Chinese food! Let me get my cash! (runs to her room to get her money)
Rachel: (entering) Oh, hey, Mona!
Mona: Hi! Hi. Hi, Rachel! (to Ross) Whats she doing here?
Rachel: Ill be watching TV if anybody needs me. (exits to her room)
Rachel: Im not here! Thats just my Chinese food!
Rachel: You know what Im going to do? Im going to get in my sweats, and eat this in bed! (exits)
Rachel: (entering) Im just going to grab the phone.
Mona: Oh, Rachel! Wait! Hey, I hope you dont take this the wrong way, but, but, um what are you doing?
Rachel: Oh, Im sorry! Do you need the phone?
Rachel: (as Ross enters with a present) But, but, Mona, I live here.
Rachel: (entering) Hi! Im so sorry to barge in on your Valentines, but I had to get away from all the yelling. Mona is dumping Ross.
Rachel: Why? You saw it? Is it scary?
Rachel: Well, now, wait. Now Im all freaked out. Come on, you guys will watch it with me.
Rachel: Cmon, seriously, you guys, youre not going to make me watch this alone!
Rachel: Okay. (watching the tape) Ooh, my! (Rachel jumps when the woman starts screaming) Woah! Why is that baby torturing that woman?!
Rachel: Uh! Its horrible!
Rachel: Oh, my God!
(Monica and Rachel both cover their eyes)
Rachel: What? Did her ass explode?!
Rachel: Oh, screw you guys, you dont have to do it!
Ross: Well, with everything thats been going on lately, I havent exactly been the perfect boyfriend. You know, I, uh, I didnt tell her I got Rachel pregnant. I gave her a key to my apartment, and then had the locks changed! And then I lied to her about Rachel moving in with me. In a way, I actually judge her for not breaking up with me sooner, you know?
Joey: Its Rachel.
[Scene: Ross and Rachels. Rachel is standing in front of the TV holding a video.]
Rachel: (thinking) Youre going to have a baby, and you need to be prepared. Now, youre going to make yourself watch the whole thing. Just do it! (Rachel puts the tape in the VCR)
Rachel: (thinking) Hmm maybe it starts with how she gets pregnant.
Rachel: Oooh.
Rachel: Mon?
Ross: No, no it's, um, it's not you, um, it's um, it's (turns and sees his Mom standing where Rachel is)
Ross: (to Rachel): OK, I am calling your seventeen. What do you got?
Rachel: Oh, oh, that's what you're talking about. (to Chandler) Hey.
Ross and Rachel: Noo.
Rachel: Nooo!
Parker: Rachel, you have life growing inside you. Is there anything in this world more miraculous thanOh a picture of a dog! Whose is this?
Chandler: Thank you Rachel.
Rachel: Yeah, I dont think so Joe.
Rachel: Good luck Chandler.
Rachel: Bye hon.
RACHEL: Yeah, these are pretty ch-ching.
RACHEL: Why are you adding, why are you adding, why are you adding, why are you adding?
Rachel: Are you serious?
Rachel: Well, what happened to your jam plan?
Rachel: All right, easy mimey, the moment has passed, it aint gonna happen!
RACHEL: Afraid to ask him?
Rachel: I was faking it! Can't you tell when I'm being fake?
Ross: Hmm, a lot of this stuff is from Colonial times. Hey, what are some other time periods Rachel? (She glares at him.)
Chandler: For my last birthday you gave me a hug! (To Rachel) Okay, read the card! Read the card!
Rachel: Oh, I know. Hey, yknow what we never did? (Ross looks at her.) Oh no, not that. (Ross nods okay.) We uh, we never had bonus night!
MR. WINEBURG: Rachel!
Rachel: Right, and the humiliating.
Rachel: Go-go!
Rachel: Phoebe, what are you doing?
RACHEL: Because I promised Mindy I would.
Paul: Oh Rachel, Im so sorry. I didnt mean to overwhelm you. Its just that, when those gates open, you (Starts to breakdown.) Hard to close em. But they are closed now. Believe me.
Rachel: Joey! I cant believe you just did that!
Ross: No. Rachel hooked me up with a tux! But not just any tux, Batmans tux!
Ross: That's right, sex is off the table. (The door starts to open behind him and Dr. Green emerges) I am never having sex with you again. (Rachel stays quiet and after a few moments Ross realizes what has happened. He turns abruptly) Dr. Green, are you feeling better? (Rachel's dad glares at him with a deadly look)
Rachel: Hello.
Rachel: Yeah.
Rachel: (reading the note) "Pheebs, cant make it, got a date. Talk to you later. Big Daddy." (Laughs) Big Daddy?
Rachel: Thats....
Monica: Look look! It's Rachel and Barry. No, don't everybody look at once!
Rachel: (reading what he wrote again) "Dear Rach, youre a great person. Sorry about your tiney-wienie." (Will laughs.)
Rachel: I couldn't be inner. Monica?
Rachel: Oh. Do you want to watch the rest of the movie with me?
Rachel: Noo way, Kevin.
Rachel: All right, look. Why don't you just return the book, let Joey give her the clock pen, and you give her something worse than that. Like... a regular pen.
Rachel: That is neither here nor there.
Rachel: Monica, would you calm down? The credit card people said that you only have to pay for the stuff that you bought.
RACHEL: Maybe you should put it off.
Monica: (Jumping up to make Rachel sit down) Okay, okay. I hate this.
Rachel: Unbelievable.
RACHEL: Alright, I feel that this is totally unjustified. [Monica starts making faces behind her back] She gave me the green light, I did nothing but-. Do you think I can't see you in the TV set?
Rachel: Very nice touch.
[Scene: Central Perk, Rachel is approaching a customer.]
Rachel: Oh really?! Then how come all your stuff is in this box?! (Monica starts chasing Rachel around the table.)
Rachel: (entering from her room) Okay, gotta go! Wish me luck!
[Scene: Rachels office, shes looking at a picture of Tag when he knocks and enters.]
Rachel: Men are unbelievable.
Rachel: Yeah, you do.
Rachel: Oh.
(In the meantime, Rachel has returned with the perfume and sprays a mist out in front of Phoebe who walks through the mist and does a little spin.)
Rachel: Ooh, I was kinda hoping that wouldn't be an issue... [Scene: Monica's Apartment, everyone is there and watching a Spanish Soap on TV and are trying to figure out what is going on.]
Rachel: No Ross!! (stands up and moves away from him) Dont! You cant just kiss me and think youre gonna make it all go away, okay? It doesnt work that way. It doesnt just make it better. Okay?
Rachel: Oh but Phoebe, were gonna be late for the movie.
(They struggle for the cart. Finally, Rachel climbs inside of it.)
RACHEL: No sorry hon, Monica's orders.
[Cut to a close-up of Rachel, eagerly awaiting Ross's arrival... not knowing he is getting off the plane with another woman.]
Rachel: Oh, Ross, Im sorry. I completely ruined your evening.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica, Phoebe, and Rachel are there. Monica is holding the wrapping paper from one of Rachel's gifts.]
Rachel: Well umm, that one is pretty but uh, I just, I just love this fabric (On the other one.) Sorry.
Rachel: Yeah, it is.
Rachel: Can I please be there when you tell her? (Joey nods yes.)
Rachel: Wh So If neither of you are married by the time youre 40, youre gonna marry Joey.
Dina: Look, Rachels told me how much easier youve made all this on her. Why cant you do that for me?
Rachel: This is a very critical time right now. If you feel yourself reaching for that phone, then you go shoe shopping, you get your butt in a bubble bath. You want her back you have to start acting aloof.
Rachel: Yeah.
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross is playing his music. Monica, Phoebe, and Rachel are sitting on the couch.]
Rachel: (softly) I really think you need to go now.
Rachel: (softly) I think you should go.
Rachel: Honey, this will help. (hands him a tub of ice cream)
Monica: Nooo! (Giggles) Okay. (She tries to pull herself up by Rachel and Joeys doorknob, but the door opens and she almost falls into the their apartment. She manages to catch herself.) Whoa! (Stands up, unsteadily) Okay. See I was, I was a little nervous about turning (whispering) thirty. (Giggles.) So the bus boys took me out for some drinks. (Pause) I wanna puke on you later!
Rachel: Well relax, hell be here.
Rachel: Amazingly, that makes sense.
Rachel: Any sign of your brother?
Rachel: Terrible? Hell, I was in Greece! That was a nice hotel! Nice beach, met the nice people. Not to shabby for Rachel. (Goes and puts her luggage away.)
Monica: Phoebe! Rachel! Its Monica! I wonder what you could possibly need me for on such short notice! (She bursts into the apartment to find only Phoebe and Rachel sitting on the couch.) Oh.
Rachel: Yeah, what the hell did I know!
Phoebe: And this is Rachel.
Rachel: Hardy Boy.
Rachel: Hi!
Rachel: Oh, well, that shouldnt be so hard, now that youre dating. (Imitating men at their worst) "Sweetheart, youre fired, but how bout a quickie before I go to work?"
Rachel: Oh, its a Macys bag!
Rachel: I mean, I'll fly back and forth, they'll fly you out... Anything we want.
Ross: she came and dragged me out of the labor room to ask me why Im not with Rachel.
Rachel: (sarcastic) Oh yeah. There is a plan! Why don't I just start taking my smart pills now?
[Scene: An Emergency Room, Rachel and Monica enter. Rachel is limping and leaning on Monica for support.]
RACHEL: Oh yeah. Well, at least I wasn't too chicken to tell some guy I thought he was cute.
Rachel: Three of your five, what?
Rachel: What do you get? (She throws her pom-poms to Joey and Phoebe and performs a cartwheel.) Emily!! (Tries to do another one.) EmilWhoa!! (She falls in Chandlers room.) Okay! So thats me as a cheerleader! Ta-dum! (Gunthers the only one that claps.)
Rachel: I hate this apartment! I hate the color of these walls! I hate the fact that this place still smells like bird! I hate that singing guy!
Rachel: So?
Ross: I know and I was going to, but I thought it was better that you heard it from Rachels father. Look I I made a mistake, but its only because I really, really like you. Really!
Rachel: Well, it doesnt sound like it! I mean, its pretty easy not to kiss someone, you just dont kiss them! See look at us, right now, not kissing!
Rachel: No, no dont get mad because lookthis is what happened. So I-I started packing, then I realized, "What am I doing? I am lousy at packing!" Right? But you love packing! So, as a gift to you, on our last night, ta-da!
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, the party continues with Rachel leaning on the counter as Gunther walks in carrying candy.]