words in movies
Rachel: Yeah but yknow what they say Mon, "Theres no such thing as bad press."
Rachel: I didnt write it.
[Scene: Ross and Rachel's, its late at night, Rachel is sitting on the couch in the dark wide-awake as Ross walks to the bathroom.]
Rachel: Ross!
Rachel: I am freaking out!
Rachel: My due date is in one week!
Rachel: That is seven days!
Rachel: (interrupting him) No-no-no-no-no Ross! Please, come on we do not have any of the big stuff we need! We do not a changing table! We do not have a crib! We do not have a diaper service!
Rachel: Im serious.
Rachel: Okay. Thank you. Thats great. Thank you. Wait-wait! Where on west 10th? Because theres this really cute shoe store that has like this little
Rachel: (stopping him) Oh, wait Ross! Im sorry, one more thing!
Rachel: Umm, our situation. Yknow umm, what we mean to each other. And I mean we-were having this baby together, and we live together. Isnt that, isnt that weird?
Rachel: Im just kidding! You can go pee! (He does so in a hurry.)
[Scene: The Baby Furniture Store, Ross and Rachel are checking out.]
Rachel: Oh.
Rachel: No-no-no! No, no, no, were not married.
Ross: We are having a baby together, but were not involved. (The cashier, a very beautiful woman, looks confused) I mean, uh we-we were seeing each other a while ago, but then we were just friends. And then there was one drunken night. (Rachel looks at him angrily) Or, yes stranger, wed like this delivered please.
Rachel: Oh yeah! Actually, thats one of the reasons why were not a couple.
Rachel: Oh. Oh yeah, dont get to worked up over it. I mean it-it sounds like hes a doctor, but hes not.
Rachel: Oh my God! Im standing at a cash register, holding a credit card, and Im bored.
Cashier: I can tell you work out. (Ross is please and Rachel looks at him confused.) A paleontologist who works out, youre like Indiana Jones. (Rachel has a disbelieving look on her face.)
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe is there as Rachel enters.]
Rachel: Hi Pheebs!
Rachel: Oh, it was great! We got everything that we needed! Oh and Ross, almost got something that wasnt on the list. A whore.
Rachel: Well, we were paying for our stuff and this saleswoman just started flirting with him.
Rachel: Yeah.
Rachel: You dont understand! You didnt see how brazen she was.
Rachel: No! Im not! I-I-I just think its wrong! Its-its that ImHere I am about to pop and hes out picking up some shop girl at Sluts R Us!
Phoebe: Is that a real place? (Rachels stunned) Are they hiring?
Chandler: (entering) Hey Phoebe! (To Rachel) Fatty!
Rachel: Oh yeah! You reallyYou look great.
Chandler: (To Rachel) Did you like me when we first met?
Rachel: Chandler, Im not gonna lie to ya, but I am gonna run away from you. (Gets up and hurries out.)
[Scene: Ross and Rachel's, Ross and Rachel are unpacking and setting up their new purchases.]
Rachel: All this stuff takes up a lot of room. Hey how uh, how serious are you about keeping Ben in your life?
Ross: Oh. (Reaches into his pocket for some money as Rachel enters the living room and watches holding two stuffed dinosaurs.)
Rachel: Horny bitch. (They both look at her, pretending that the dinosaurs shes holding are arguing.) No! Youre a horny bitch! Noooo! Youre the horny bitch! No! Youre a horny bitch!
Rachel: So you guys go, have a really good time.
Ross: (To Katie) Yeah, Im just gonna grab my coat. And uh, and my whip. (Katie looks worried.) Yknow because of the Indiana Jones? (Katie laughs) Not-not because Im-Im into S&M. (Katies worried again.) Im not-Im not into anything weird. Yknow? Just-just normal sex. (Katie is uncomfortable.) So, Im gonna grab my coat. (Does so, leaving Katie and Rachel alone.)
Rachel: So, you had a good day huh? Big commission; picked up a daddy.
Rachel: Oh yeah! Yeah please, you guys have fun.
Rachel: Oh and it was great to see you too. And you look fantastic, although you missed a button.
Rachel: Oh okay, I see what youre doing there.
Rachel: Hi! Youre back from your date!
Rachel: Im fine, but thats not important. Whats important is how was she?
Rachel: Oh uh-huh, uh-huh, coffee, a little rub-rub-rub under the table.
Rachel: No! No, shesShe was nice. I mean, shes a little slutty, but who isnt?
Rachel: Of course you did Ross, you would date a gorilla if it called you Indiana Jones!
Rachel: No! Its just that, Kate bothered me.
Rachel: There was nothing wrong with her! All right? She was perfectly lovely!
Rachel: I dont want you to date her!
Rachel: Yes! And not because I want you to go out with me, but because I dont want you to go out with anybody! Okay? I know its a terrible thing to even think this, and its completely inappropriate, but I want you to be at my constant beck and call 24 hours a day! Im very sorry, but that is just the way that I feel.
Rachel: What?!
Rachel: Really? But Im being so unreasonable.
Rachel: (starting to cry) Oh Ross, thank you. Thank you. (They hug.)
Rachel: No, not really. Youre pressing the baby into my bladder and now I have to pee. Sorry. (She gets up and starts for the bathroom.)
Rachel: Yeah. (Stops and starts doing the I-have-to-go-to-the-bathroom dance.)
Rachel: Uh-huh.
Rachel: (pause) Wow! I dont know, maybe. Im
Rachel: (laughs) I knew that! I knew that! I was just messin with you too!
Rachel: Oh no-no-no-no, no!
Rachel: No thats just(Laughs)Thats just cause Im such a good messer!
(They both laugh. Ross sits down, but Rachel doesnt move and is lost in thought.)
Rachel: Yeah?
Rachel: Right! (Heads for the bathroom.)
Rachel: Because, hes my friend.
Rachel: Really!?
[Ross, Phoebe, Chandler, and Rachel all exchange money.]
Rachel: Definitely! Phoebe, you will not find a single game show host, whos ass I cannot kick.
Phoebe: (To Rachel) Thank you Rachel but, look at Monica!
Rachel: A big idiot.
Rachel: Come on Ross! Im miserable here! Come on! You started this, now you finish it! Come on wuss, make love to me.
Rachel: (interrupting him) Hi! Im gal pal Rachel Green, and if you want the dirt, Im the one you come too. This might be Joeys baby (rubbing her stomach), who knows? Im just kiddingSeriously, (leans into the cassette recorder Shelley is using) gal pal Rachel Green.
[Scene: Rachel's office, Mark is training Rachel.]
RACHEL: Uh, no she doesn't but I can, I can get a message to her.
Rachel: Did you ever do the-the Leia thing?
Rachel: Ooooh! Wow!! Oh, hi.
[Cut to Rachel staring out of her window.]
Rachel: Oh, that is so...
Rachel: No...oh, I feel so stupid! Oh, I think about the other day with you guys and I was all "Oh, Paolo, he's so great, he makes me feel so..." Oh, God, I'm so embarrassed!
Rachel: Okay.
Phoebe: Aww, and good luck to you too! (To Monica and Rachel) What a nice lady!
Rachel: I want to tell you to have a good honeymoon! (Hugs Monica.)
(Rachel enters from the bathroom and sees the coat.)
Phoebe: (to Rachel, whos staying in the cab.) Arent you gonna go?
(Rachel stands there for a moment, starting to cry. Then gasps and runs over and hugs him. While hugging her, Ross tries to find the Does it? part in the letter.)
Rachel: No, no, no. It's ok. I'm gonna be fine.
Rachel: No. Thank you.
Rachel: Yeah! Especially not with all of these knives and cookbooks around
Rachel: What?!!
Rachel: Eh. Beth dies.
Rachel: I just never had a relationship with that kind of passion, you know, where you have to have somebody right there, in the middle of a theme park.
Rachel: Oo, I cant watch this, its like Sophies Choice.
Rachel: How... wha... Hey! What are you... What is this? Have you guys been listening this entire time?
Rachel: Pheebs, if I had never met him this never would have happened!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Chandler and Monica are there and Rachel is arranging a bouquet of flowers, pricks her finger on a thorn, throws the bouquet over her head, and those you who are quicker than some already know that Monica is the one who catches it.]
Rachel: Oh, hi.
Rachel: Oh, they're firemen guys.
(Ross calls Rachel)
Rachel: (nervous) So it would just be, me alone?
Joey: About a month ago this guy spent the night with Rachel, I didnt see who it was but (He walks out and closes the door.)
Rachel: (angrily) None for me.
Rachel: Hey, Ross!!! I told you I dont!
Rachel: Good bye!
Rachel: Ross youre not listening to me, I dont have time to stop.
Rachel: But I told you, I didnt have the time!
Monica: All right, Phoebe get open. Rachel, go long.
Rachel: Just a job!
Rachel: Well neither do I!
Rachel: (shocked) Oh my God.
Rachel: (sticking her head in from the balcony) Wait, are you leaving?
Rachel: You had no right coming down to my office Ross. You do not bring a picnic basket to somebodys work! Unless maybe they were a park ranger!
Rachel: Oh you really, you really just dont want to hear about it.
Rachel: OK, OK, it's my turn. (reads the answer)
Rachel: Yeah. Well, umm.....
Rachel: No! Sorry, I just thought you were somebody else. Hi!
Rachel: Oh. Okay, bye.
Rachel: Hello.
Monica: (to Rachel) Hey, where is this guy, it's been over an hour!
Rachel: I accidentally kissed him in the interview, and now he wants me back y'know of course, 'cause "Let's bring the girl back who kisses everybody!"
Rachel: Nobody.
Rachel: Hey-hey-hey thats funny! Your funny Chandler! Your a funny guy! You wanna know what else is really funny?!
Rachel: Hi! Oh, Im so glad you called.
PHOE: [seeing Ross kissing Julie outside the window] Ooh, oh, Rachel, don't look.
Rachel: (all mushy) Oh, you know what? Let's not say anything else. I love you. (they hug)
Rachel: No. A break from us.
Ross: Yeah, why is it staring at me? I think it knows Im talking about it. (Rachel starts to peek at the file) Dont-dont youWhWhaHey!!
Rachel: Hey.
Rachel: Nobody.
Rachel: No.
Rachel: Oh Pheebs thats so sweet(Grabs a pair of pants)Ooh, those are so cute!
Rachel: I bet youre a Gemini.
Rachel: All right, listen, missy. If you want this cart, you're gonna have to take me with it!
Rachel: Bye.
Rachel: So, I love you.
Rachel: And y'know what, Im gonna, Im gonna go to bed now, but ah, on my way to work tomorrow morning, Im gonna stop by around 8:30.
Rachel: What?!
Rachel: Well since Im movin out and-and youre so beautiful
Joey: No, no, no! Its real! And it has been since 1998. (Rachel returns from the bathroom.) Hey Rach! Rach! Im up for a Soapie!
Monica: Rachel, what are you doing? Its freezing out here. Would you come back inside?
RACHEL: No, I knew.
RACHEL: What you got there? Something else that's not yours that you can break?
Rachel: Oh no-no-no! No, I got this all under control.
JOEY: What're you doin' here? Aren't you supposed to be out with Rachel?
Ross: Rachel?
Rachel: Just get away from me!
Rachel: Ross, you had sex with another woman!
Rachel: Was she good?
Rachel: Okay! All right! How was she?
Rachel: Oh. Oh. Well there you go. Whew! (Pause) That isthats greatthat is really great-great news. (Pause) Yknow cause the whole not being ready and kinda the financial aspects, all that. Whew. Wow, this is so just the way it was supposed to be. (Starts to cry.) God.
Rachel: No. No, not at all, not at all. I actually was gonna bring someone myself, so
Rachel: What, whats it, whats going on?
Rachel: Cant I just look at the handles on them?
(Rachel goes back and sits down. The rest don't know what to say.)
Rachel: (To Joey) I cant believe that you yelled at my boss! Im-Im gonna lose my job! What am I going to do?!
Rachel: Great!
Rachel: See Pheebs, I promised you no one would die, didnt I?
Rachel: No. (Ross is standing in the doorway.) A break from us.
Ross: Yeah, uhm... I mean, Rachel and I, think you are great... with Emma... uhm... We just feel...
Rachel: Ugh, okay, well somebody will come and save us.
Rachel: Ooh, it was only okay.
[Rachel starts to walk up.]
Rachel: Okay. Oh wait, wait-wait, youre not gonna come with me?
Rachel: Yeah, they said he's gonna be fine, but he's still heavily sedated.
Rachel: Nooo! Its not okay! I cant believe you would want to after what he did to me!