words in movies
Rachel: Yeah but yknow what they say Mon, "Theres no such thing as bad press."
Rachel: I didnt write it.
[Scene: Ross and Rachel's, its late at night, Rachel is sitting on the couch in the dark wide-awake as Ross walks to the bathroom.]
Rachel: Ross!
Rachel: I am freaking out!
Rachel: My due date is in one week!
Rachel: That is seven days!
Rachel: (interrupting him) No-no-no-no-no Ross! Please, come on we do not have any of the big stuff we need! We do not a changing table! We do not have a crib! We do not have a diaper service!
Rachel: Im serious.
Rachel: Okay. Thank you. Thats great. Thank you. Wait-wait! Where on west 10th? Because theres this really cute shoe store that has like this little
Rachel: (stopping him) Oh, wait Ross! Im sorry, one more thing!
Rachel: Umm, our situation. Yknow umm, what we mean to each other. And I mean we-were having this baby together, and we live together. Isnt that, isnt that weird?
Rachel: Im just kidding! You can go pee! (He does so in a hurry.)
[Scene: The Baby Furniture Store, Ross and Rachel are checking out.]
Rachel: Oh.
Rachel: No-no-no! No, no, no, were not married.
Ross: We are having a baby together, but were not involved. (The cashier, a very beautiful woman, looks confused) I mean, uh we-we were seeing each other a while ago, but then we were just friends. And then there was one drunken night. (Rachel looks at him angrily) Or, yes stranger, wed like this delivered please.
Rachel: Oh yeah! Actually, thats one of the reasons why were not a couple.
Rachel: Oh. Oh yeah, dont get to worked up over it. I mean it-it sounds like hes a doctor, but hes not.
Rachel: Oh my God! Im standing at a cash register, holding a credit card, and Im bored.
Cashier: I can tell you work out. (Ross is please and Rachel looks at him confused.) A paleontologist who works out, youre like Indiana Jones. (Rachel has a disbelieving look on her face.)
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe is there as Rachel enters.]
Rachel: Hi Pheebs!
Rachel: Oh, it was great! We got everything that we needed! Oh and Ross, almost got something that wasnt on the list. A whore.
Rachel: Well, we were paying for our stuff and this saleswoman just started flirting with him.
Rachel: Yeah.
Rachel: You dont understand! You didnt see how brazen she was.
Rachel: No! Im not! I-I-I just think its wrong! Its-its that ImHere I am about to pop and hes out picking up some shop girl at Sluts R Us!
Phoebe: Is that a real place? (Rachels stunned) Are they hiring?
Chandler: (entering) Hey Phoebe! (To Rachel) Fatty!
Rachel: Oh yeah! You reallyYou look great.
Chandler: (To Rachel) Did you like me when we first met?
Rachel: Chandler, Im not gonna lie to ya, but I am gonna run away from you. (Gets up and hurries out.)
[Scene: Ross and Rachel's, Ross and Rachel are unpacking and setting up their new purchases.]
Rachel: All this stuff takes up a lot of room. Hey how uh, how serious are you about keeping Ben in your life?
Ross: Oh. (Reaches into his pocket for some money as Rachel enters the living room and watches holding two stuffed dinosaurs.)
Rachel: Horny bitch. (They both look at her, pretending that the dinosaurs shes holding are arguing.) No! Youre a horny bitch! Noooo! Youre the horny bitch! No! Youre a horny bitch!
Rachel: So you guys go, have a really good time.
Ross: (To Katie) Yeah, Im just gonna grab my coat. And uh, and my whip. (Katie looks worried.) Yknow because of the Indiana Jones? (Katie laughs) Not-not because Im-Im into S&M. (Katies worried again.) Im not-Im not into anything weird. Yknow? Just-just normal sex. (Katie is uncomfortable.) So, Im gonna grab my coat. (Does so, leaving Katie and Rachel alone.)
Rachel: So, you had a good day huh? Big commission; picked up a daddy.
Rachel: Oh yeah! Yeah please, you guys have fun.
Rachel: Oh and it was great to see you too. And you look fantastic, although you missed a button.
Rachel: Oh okay, I see what youre doing there.
Rachel: Hi! Youre back from your date!
Rachel: Im fine, but thats not important. Whats important is how was she?
Rachel: Oh uh-huh, uh-huh, coffee, a little rub-rub-rub under the table.
Rachel: No! No, shesShe was nice. I mean, shes a little slutty, but who isnt?
Rachel: Of course you did Ross, you would date a gorilla if it called you Indiana Jones!
Rachel: No! Its just that, Kate bothered me.
Rachel: There was nothing wrong with her! All right? She was perfectly lovely!
Rachel: I dont want you to date her!
Rachel: Yes! And not because I want you to go out with me, but because I dont want you to go out with anybody! Okay? I know its a terrible thing to even think this, and its completely inappropriate, but I want you to be at my constant beck and call 24 hours a day! Im very sorry, but that is just the way that I feel.
Rachel: What?!
Rachel: Really? But Im being so unreasonable.
Rachel: (starting to cry) Oh Ross, thank you. Thank you. (They hug.)
Rachel: No, not really. Youre pressing the baby into my bladder and now I have to pee. Sorry. (She gets up and starts for the bathroom.)
Rachel: Yeah. (Stops and starts doing the I-have-to-go-to-the-bathroom dance.)
Rachel: Uh-huh.
Rachel: (pause) Wow! I dont know, maybe. Im
Rachel: (laughs) I knew that! I knew that! I was just messin with you too!
Rachel: Oh no-no-no-no, no!
Rachel: No thats just(Laughs)Thats just cause Im such a good messer!
(They both laugh. Ross sits down, but Rachel doesnt move and is lost in thought.)
Rachel: Yeah?
Rachel: Right! (Heads for the bathroom.)
Rachel: (deadpan) Oh honey thank God youre home, I was getting worried.
Rachel: (To Marcel) And I will see you tomorrow!
Rachel: Oh... Italy, I think.
Rachel: No seriously, yknow the contracts I gave you, did you overnight them?
Rachel: No, I didn't. I wouldn't say I had the keys unless I had the keys, and I obviously didn't have the keys.
[Time lapse. Melanie, Joey's girlfriend, is there with Joey, Chandler, Monica, Phoebe, and Rachel. Ross is gone.]
RACHEL: That is the most ridiculous.
[Scene: Joey's apartment. He's prying open the drawer with a crowbar to no avail. Monica, Rachel and Chandler enter.]
RACHEL: Oh that's what you want.
RACHEL: Fine.
[Rachel runs to the sink to spit it out.]
Rachel: Yeah, this is Tag. Tag, this is Phoebe. Phoebe, can I see you for a second? (Goes into office.)
RACHEL: I'll help you throw out your purse.
MONICA: Rachel, you say you're sorry or your sweater gets it.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's. Rachel and Ross are there. Ross is trying to get the dress off Marcel.]
[Monica and Rachel start yelling at the same time]
Rachel: (looks around for the camera) Okay. Umm, well, first I would like to start by apologizing for kissing you and uh, for yelling at you.
Rachel: (yelling and jumping like a child) OH, a soap opera roof party!! I'm going to a soap opera roof party!! Oh my God, oh my God!! (realizing how she's behaving) And it's out of my system!
Rachel: Oh yknow what? Yknow what? Now that you know what you want you should go to Kleinmans and get it half off. This place is so overpriced.
[Scene: Central Perk, everyone is there as Rachel enters, happily.]
Rachel: Mmm-hmmm. Oh, so typical. Ooo, I'm a man. Ooo, I have a penis. Ooo, I have to win money to exert my power over women. (hands over her money)
MONICA AND RACHEL: Oh, no no no no no.
RACHEL: OK, well, bye. [kisses him]
Rachel: What are you guys doing here?
MONICA AND RACHEL: No no no no.
RACHEL: Oh yeah.
RACHEL: Impressive.
Monica (as Rachel): Hi.
Rachel: That's what I said! Thank you for being so nice. (They hug.)
Rachel: All right, all right, you're right, I won't do anything with Joey, I just thought that we (Joey enters the hall) Ok so that would be two cups of tarragon, one pound of baking soda and one red onion? (Joey enters his apartment)
Rachel: Ok, Ross, what�s going on here, are we just bringing strange women back to the apartment now?
Rachel: You know what, we just say that she said it was 5 o'clock. We'll just act casual. We're not late, we're right on time. (When she finishes talking, a note is pushed from under Monica's and Chandler's door, into the hall. Ross picks it up and reads it out loud)
Rachel: (still can't find him) How are you doing this?
Rachel: Well yknow what? I hope Monica forgives you after you throw her, her vegetarian, voodoo, goddess circley shower! (Runs out.)
RACHEL: I think it's sexy.
(Monica glares triumphantly across the room, scaring Rachel who also stands up.)
RACHEL: Oh, it was so much fun.� It felt so good to be out.
Rachel: No Phoebe, I am not letting you put makeup on my baby!
Rachel: No-n-n-n-no! I am finally thinking clearly. My lucky dress wasnt working out to well for me, but for four years, this baby never missed.
Rachel: Oh, oh. (she's holding the present, a transparent bag with a white stick in it). What is this?
RACHEL: Oh! What's new in sex?
Rachel: That-that is your make out buddy. Dont you recognize him? (Holding up the magazine in front of her face.) Oh wait. Ohh, Phoebe I love you. Kiss me please.
RACHEL: Hi.
RACHEL: No. [hitting each other]
MRS. GELLER: Oh, hi Rachel.
Rachel: (upset) All right, well, if you must know... I had a traumatic... swing incident... when I was little.
Rachel: Well theres yore. And uh, yknow, yesteryear.
Rachel: Well hello! Welcome to Monica's. May I take your coat?
RACHEL: What?
RACHEL: What?
RACHEL: What?
RACHEL: NO but Ross. We are never gonna happen, OK. Accept that.
RACHEL: Ross, there is no us, OK.
Julie: Rachel, do you have any muffins left?
Rachel: The earring? No. But look, I found my sunglasses under the couch! I've been looking for these since like last summer. (Puts 'em on.)
Rachel: Well, last time I almost got fired. You must end it, you must end it now!
Rachel: No. What do you do if I say we are coming about?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Phoebe is on the couch as Rachel returns carrying a bunch of shopping bags.]
Rachel: Okay. Uhh, Ross, y'know what, there's something that I-that I have to talk to you about and everybody's saying that I shouldn't tell you, but I think they're wrong. I mean, and you know how people can be wrong.
RACHEL: No, no, ACC-cept that.
RACHEL: What, what incident?
Rachel: (to Monica): Really? (out loud): Sure, we have scones left! (to Monica): OK, read them to me.
ROSS: [Rachel enters] Oh.
RACHEL: Oh.
RACHEL: Hi.
RACHEL: Oh my God.
RACHEL: What?
Rachel: Hi, I thought you might like some ice chips.
RACHEL: Oh, the guys are here.
[Scene: Central Perk. Ross, Rachel, and Monica are hanging out.]
RACHEL: Oh, thanks. So, uh, what are you gonna do this summer?
RACHEL: Where's Chip, why isn't he here yet?
RACHEL: Well, then, you know, couldn't she have just copied my haircut?
Rachel: Well, congratulations, so do you love her?
Phoebe: No! Rachel, thats what they want me to do. My warranty expires tomorrow, if I dont get through, theyre not gonna fix my crappy, broken phone for free! We cannot let them win! Its us versus them!
Monica: Thank you. Rachel, can I talk to you outside for a sec?
JOEY: Yeah, someplace nice. (to Phoebe and Rachel) How much do you think I can get for my kidney? (at Central Perk)
[Rachel enters]
RACHEL: Hey you.
RACHEL: Yeah well, Ross just made plans for the whole century.
RACHEL: So, uh, how was your day?
RACHEL: Really? Mine too.
RACHEL: Hi you guys.
Joey: Oh my God, Im sorry, Im being so rude. (Turns to Rachel.) Rachel, would like a soda or something? Because Chandler would run right out and get it.
Rachel: No, you're right, you are absolutely right. I mean that makes, that makes everything different.
RACHEL: Hi.
RACHEL: Oh, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you. See Phoebe, Phoebe.
[ROss approaches Rachel at counter.]
RACHEL: More than jewelry. [Rachel struts off, extremely pleased with herself]
Monica: Okay! Okay! Okay! (She succeeds in getting the eye drops in and everyone climbs off of Rachel.) We'll see you in about 3 to 4 hours.
Rachel: Oh no no no no no, Gavin can't, he already has plans, most likely with his mother.
Rachel: Oh god what am I gonna do you guys, I cant even comfort my own baby! Im the worst mother ever!
RACHEL: Monica.
RACHEL: Monica.
RACHEL: Monica.
Chandler/Joey/Rachel/Monica: Bye bye Mike!/Cya mike!/Bye mike!/Bye bye now!
RACHEL: Just one cheek.
RACHEL: Rub it.
RACHEL: C'mon touch it.
Rachel: No, no, no.... the, um, the... 'love' part?