words in movies
Emily: If anyone asks, well just say Ben addressed them. (Looking through the envelopes.) Oh! So you invited Rachel then?
Emily: Oh, no-no, yknow I absolutely adore Rachel its just that, well it might be a awkward for you. But its absolutely your decision. (Gets up.) More tea?
[And with that we start off on a series of clips from the entire history of Ross and Rachel, from Rosss point of view. The first clip is from The Pilot.]
Monica: Rachel?!
Rachel: Oh God Monica hi! I just went to your building and you weren't there and then this guy with a big hammer said you might be here and you are, you are!
Monica: Okay, everybody, this is Rachel, another Lincoln High survivor. (To Rachel) This is everybody, this is Chandler, and Phoebe, and Joey, and- you remember my brother Ross?
Rachel: Hi, sure!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Ross and Rachel are finishing up some cookies.]
Rachel: I knew.
Rachel: I did.
Rachel: Yeah, maybe...
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Ross and Rachel are talking about passion.]
Rachel: Really?
Rachel: Oh Ross, you're so great. [she playfully rubs his head and gets up]
Rachel: Okay.
Rachel: Ohhh!!!! [looking at something behind Ross]
Rachel: Oh, look at the little cat! [a small kitten is on the roof behind Ross] Look at it!
[Cut to inside, Monica, Joey and Phoebe are singing while outside, Ross and Rachel are trying to get the cat off of Ross' shoulder.]
[Scene: The Laundromat, Rachel is fighting with that old, annoying woman for a cart.]
Rachel: All right, listen, missy. If you want this cart, you're gonna have to take me with it!
Rachel: (to Ross) Yes! Did you see that?
Rachel: I could not have done this without you.
(Rachel stands up and kisses Ross. He is stunned. A moment of silence follows.)
[Scene: Central Perk, I'm sure you've guessed, it's the famous fight scene between Ross and Rachel.]
Rachel: (hurt) What?
Rachel: Hey, I was doin' great before I found out about you. You think it's easy for me to see you with Julie?
Rachel: Alright, fine, you go ahead and you do that, alright Ross.
Rachel: 'Cause I don't need your stupid ship.
Rachel: Good. (Ross leaves)
(Rachel slams the door and locks it. She sits down, visibly upset. She puts her head in her hands and begins to cry. Ross comes back and is standing outside the window. When Rachel regroups and gets back up to finish closing, she sees him.)
[The next clip is the second famous fight in The One Where Ross and Rachel Take A Break.]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Ross and Rachel are arguing.]
Rachel: Ross do you realise this is the first time in my life Im doing something I actually care about. This is the first time in my life Im doing something that Im actually good at. I mean. if you dont get that...
Rachel: Well neither do I!
Rachel: (shocked) Oh my God.
Rachel: Oh my God. I cannot keep having this same fight over and over again, Ross, no, youre, youre, youre making this too hard.
Rachel: I dont know, I dont know. Urrrgh! Look, maybe we should take a break.
Rachel: No. (Ross is standing in the doorway.) A break from us.
Ross: Oh, thank you. (She goes to kiss him, but he holds her coat up between their faces to stop her.) Hey, hey. (opens the door, sees Rachel, and hides Chloe behind the door) Rachel!!!!
Rachel: Hi. Ohhh, you got my message.
Rachel: So what do you say? Can I be your girlfriend again?
Ross: (seeing the thumbs up) Ahhhh!! (Hugs Rachel tighter.)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel has just found out about Chloe and is screaming at Ross. The rest of the gang is trapped in Monica's bedroom.]
Rachel: (opening the door) Y'know what, I want you to leave! Get outta here!
Rachel: Just get out! Now!!
Rachel: Okay! All right! How was she?
Rachel: Was she good?
Rachel: Come on Ross! You said you wanted to talk about it, lets talk about it!! How was she?
Rachel: Good different?
(Rachel picks up a newspaper and starts beating him with it.)
[Scene: Rachel's bedroom, Rachel, entering selfish mode, is thanking Ross for wrongly taking the entire blame of the breakup; as if she had absolutely nothing to do with it.]
Rachel: ...the way you owned up to everything, it just showed me how much youve grown. Y'know? I mean my Mom never thought this would work out. It was all, Once a cheater, always a cheater. Ooh, I just wish we hadnt lost those four months, but if time was what you needed just to gain a little perspective...
[Scene: The hallway, Rachel is convincing Ross that Emily is good for him.]
Rachel: You seem to really like her.
Rachel: Ross, that girl just spent the entire evening talking to your friends, asking to hear stories about you, looking through Monicas photo albums, I mean you dont do that if youre just in it for two weeks.
Rachel: Yeah, you got like 14 hours until she has to be at the airport, and youre sitting here in the hallway with a 28-year-old cheerleader with a fat lip.
Rachel: Yeah.
Rachel: (entering) Hey guys! Whats up?
(Rachel starts going through her mail, and come across her invitation.)
Rachel: Whats this? Is this Rosss wedding invitation?
Rachel: Oh, no! No you guys! Come on, you dont have to do that! Im happy for him! I am! I reallyIm-Im happIll work on it.
Rachel: Yeah.
Rachel: Oh, honey, I dont know. I
Rachel: No, Ill think about it. Yeah.
[And with that, we go into another set of clips, this time from Rachels point of view.]
[The first clip is from The One Where Rachel Finds Out.]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, it's Rachel birthday party and Chandler is about to spill the beans.]
Rachel: Who's this from?
Rachel: Oh... (opens it and sees it is a pin) Oh my God. He remembered.
Rachel: It was like months ago. We were walking by this antique store, and I saw this pin in the window, and I told him that it was just like one my grandmother had when I was a little girl. Oh! I can't believe he remembered!
(Everyone looks at him. He realizes he just spilled the beans about Ross's crush on Rachel.)
Rachel: What did you just say?
Rachel: Oh.... my God.
Rachel: (seeing Ross come off the plane with another woman.) Oh my God.
Rachel: Julie! Julie, isn't that great? I mean, isn't that just kick- you-in-the-crotch, spit-on-your-neck fantastic?
Ross: Oh, that is so sweet.(listens) No, no, ok, you hang up. Ok, ok, one, two, three.(He doesn't hang up and motions for Rachel to be quiet.) Well you didn't hang up either.
Rachel: She didn't hang up either...
Ross: Ok, no, no, you hang up. You, you, y(Rachel grabs the phone and hangs it up for him.)
[Scene, A Restaurant, Rachel is on her date, drunk, and is leaving that answering machine message.]
Rachel: (on phone) Ross, hi, it's Rachel. I'm just calling to say that um, everything's fine and I'm really happy for you and your cat...(cut)...I am over you. I am over you and that, my friend, is what they call closure. (She hangs up and tosses phone in the ice bucket.)
(Rachel comes out of her room, suddenly she remembers leaving the message.)
Rachel: Oh my God. Oh my God Ross, no, hang up the phone, give me the phone Ross, give me the phone, give me the phone, give me the. . . (She jumps the couch and lands on Ross's back, finally getting the phone from him. Ross has a confused expression on his face.)
Rachel: Ohhhhhhhh God. (climbs off his back)
Rachel: Ohh, ohh.
Rachel: Well, basically, lately, I've uh, I've uh, sort of had feelings for you.
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Ross has just broken up with Julie and is about to get with Rachel.]
Rachel: Really?
Rachel: Oh, god.
(Ross and Rachel hug.)
[The next clip is from The One Where Ross and Rachel.... You Know.]
[Scene: The Auditorium, Ross and Rachel are about to... you know.]
Rachel: Oh it's OK. You were worth the wait, and I don't just mean tonight.
(They kiss and start undressing. As Rachel tries to pull off Ross's tie she catches it in his mouth. Then they roll across the fur rug.)
Rachel: Ah, oh God. Oh, honey, oh that's OK.
Ross: Gunther! Gunther. Gunther, please tell me you didnt say anything to Rachel about me and the girl from the Xerox place.
(Ross turns around and sees Rachel sitting by the window. She is just glaring at him.)
[Scene: The beachhouse, Ross and Rachel are argueing about the breakup.]
Rachel: Yeah, because I was mad at you, not because I stopped loving you!
Rachel: Noo.
Rachel: Noo! Maybe! I, I dont know.
Rachel: I just, I feel, I-I just...
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel and Ross are finally breaking up for good, or is it?]
Rachel: Y'know I cant believe I even thought about getting back together again! We are so over!!
Rachel: And hey! Just so you know, its not that common! It doesnt happen to every guy! And it is a big deal!!
[Scene: Central Perk, Rachel is deciding on whether or not to go to the wedding.]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, the gang is watching the Prom Video and Rachel is about to make her entrance on the video. The italics are portions of the prom video.]
Mrs. Geller: Rachel's coming up the path. Doesn't she look pretty. Jack... (Rachel enters with a huge nose)
Rachel: Oh my God.
Rachel: Oh.
Rachel: I can't go to my own prom without a date, I can't, it's too late.
Mrs. Geller: (to Ross on the stairs) I have a wonderful idea. You should take Rachel to the prom.
Mr. Geller: (going downstairs) Rachel, ready or not, here comes your knight in shiningOh no. (Chip has shown up and the four are leaving.)
Rachel, Monica, Roy, and Chip: Bye.
[Rachel, seeing what he did for her, gets up, walks across the room, and kisses Ross]
[Cut back to the present, Rachel has made her decision.]
Rachel: Yeah. Its just gonna be too hard. Yknow? I mean, its Ross. How can I watch him get married? Yknow its just, its for the best, yknow it is, its Yknow, plus, somebodys got to stay here with Phoebe! Yknow shes gonna be pretty big by then, and she needs someone to help her tie her shoes; drive her to the hospital in case she goes into labour.
Rachel: I know. (Starts to cry) Yeah, see, theres so much to do and I have so little time to do it in.
Rachel: Well y'know, we have 7 people and like 10 pizzas, what do you think?
Rachel: What? What kind of a regatta gala starts at night?!
Phoebe: So, what did Rachel say when you told her you were still married to her?
Rachel: Pam! Oh God okay, just imagine this, "The Pam."
Rachel: And Mrs.?!
(Monica and Rachel's door opens and Rachel and Paolo emerge)
Rachel: (on answering machine) Hi, its me. Ive been trying to reach you all night. I feel awful. Please, Ross, you gotta know there is nothing between me and Mark. This whole break-up thing is just stupid.
Rachel: What?!!
Rachel: Yeah, but that was different. Yknow? I mean, we were, we were going out then, now I think its weird.
Rachel: Ah, Paolo, this is Phoebe.
Ross: I.....got.....dressed. Really, really quickly. Okay, okay. (Rachel starts to follow Monica into her room, but Ross stops her and sends her back to her room.) There we go, there we go.
Rachel: Is Monica around? I-I have to ask her something.
Rachel: Why, where are you going?
Rachel: Hi!
Rachel: And I also wanted you guys to know that I am telling the father today. (They all look at her expectantly) What? What? What?
Rachel: Oh wow.
Rachel: (on phone) Hello? (Shocked that someone answered.) Uh, Rachel. (To the gang.) Great, someone is in our apartment. Call the cops!
Rachel: Hey, hubby!
Rachel: Oh please, theyve been going out a week. They havent even slept together yet, I mean, thats not serious.
Rachel: Yeah. What kind of discount do we get?
Rachel: Im sorry, I was just thinking youre day could still pick up.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel is sitting in the living room and Phoebe is standing in the kitchen as the phone rings.]
Rachel: Ohh! Lucky me! Oh my God! That is good news, Ross! I think that's the best news I've heard since Le Poo died!
Rachel: Pheebs, what-what are you doing?
Rachel: Hey!
Rachel: Monica!
Rachel: We didn't change..
Phoebe: Rachel Karen Green, where's the other earring?!
[Scene: The hallway, Ross is sitting on the step drinking a beer as Rachel comes out of the guys apartment.]
[They get back to back and start rubbing against each other. Ross and Rachel enter.]
Rachel: Yeah, and not a very good one.
Rachel: Oh, yknow what you should get em? One of those little uh, portable CD players.
Rachel: Thank you. So how-how bout you, are-are you seeing anybody?
Rachel: No! They are mine!
Rachel: Yeah that seems fair. We never use them.
Rachel: Well
Ross: Love you guys. (he kisses Monica, he, Rachel and Phoebe leave.)
(They turn back to Rachel and Professor Rathman.)
Rachel: I don't know... I mean, I've never looked at you that way before.
Rachel: Really? Really?!
Rachel: Hey!
Rachel: Really?! How do you know?
Rachel: Oh, Im sorry.
[Scene: The Wedding reception, Ross and Emily are in the bathroom and Emily is yelling at him. Rachel, Chandler, Joey, and Monica are standing outside the doorway.]
Joey: Umm, listen, Ross do you really think this moving in with Rachel is a good idea?
Rachel: (answering it) Hello?
Rachel: Ahh, I dont believe you. I think you dont want them to see you begging me. (Goes to put the tape in the VCR)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, later. Rachel is waitressing, Monica is cooking. Phoebe walks in with Steve (Crystal Duck winner Jon Lovitz).]
Rachel: What?! She just called and said that she was gonna be working late! She keeps lying to me! That's it! Y'know what? I'm just gonna go over there and confront them right now!
(Rachel mumbles uh-huh and spits the half-eaten cookie out onto the tissue.)
Rachel: Go to the post office! I'm sure her picture's up! ...Okay, Monica, y'know what, honey, you're kinda losing it here! I mean, this is really becoming like a weird obsession thing.
Rachel: Well of course I do! But yknow, favorite returning character is a tough category Joey. I mean youre up against the guy who survived his own cremation.
Rachel: Look he doesnt have any brothers or sisters, somebodys gonna have to teach him this stuff! And I havent taught him anything that a normal 6-year-old doesnt know anyway!
Rachel: Oh, god, I can't believe one of us actually has one of these.
Monica: And he came at us with an axe, so Rachel had to use a bug bomb on him!
Rachel: I cannot believe that you didnt tell me that we are still married!!
[Scene: Joannas office, Rachel and Chandler are having a little tug-of-war with his pants.]
Rachel: (entering) Hey! Umm, do you guys have any juice?
Dr. Green: But what?! You figured youd get what you wanted and then dump her like you dumped Rachel!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Phoebe is entering with Rachel.]
Rachel: Well theres an idea!!
Rachel: Ross! Yknow what, I just gotwhy? Why did you do this?!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, the gang is waiting for Rachel to return from the airport with Ross.]
Rachel: Ugh! (Stares at him.)
Rachel: Okay, umm, Im gonna get my sweater. (Walks away.)
Rachel: Ross, you guys went out once. You took your kids to Chucky Cheese, and you didn't even kiss her.
Rachel: (laughs) Well, I mean, are you sure you want to go out with her? I mean that aint a pretty picture in the morning, yknow what I mean. That wig all in disarray, and boobs flung over the night stand, y'know.
Rachel: Hey... hi, ladies... uh, can I get you anything? (to Monica, quietly): Did you bring the mail?
Ross: Alright. (He goes to get the glasses. Then he hesitates and turns off the main light. Rachel looks round and he acts surprised) The, uh, the neighbours must be vacuuming. (He sits down and starts to pour the wine) Well, so long as we're here and, uh, not on the subject, I was thinking about, uh, how mad we got at each other before, and, um, I was thinking maybe it was partially because of how we, um...
[Scene: Central Perk. Rachel is talking to a man at the counter. Ross and Phoebe are sitting at the couches.]
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe, Rachel, Monica, and Joey are there.]
Rachel: Oh but he did say that they found the grandmother wandering down fifth avenue.
Monica: Yes, I'm sure! Rachel is there something that you want to talk me about?
Rachel: Oh! I remember laughing! I laughed a lot.
Rachel: Wait! (Gets her bearings) Okay!
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross, Rachel, and Phoebe are there as someones cell phone starts to ring with one of those fancy ring tones.]
Rachel: (starts to cry) Ross, please, I found the magazines!
Joey: Oh, no! (Starts that screaming thing again. Rachel stops him by pulling his fingers out of his ears.)
Rachel: And he didn't want you guys to know about it but I came over here to tell you!!
Rachel: Well, you would know.
Rachel: Ugh!
Rachel: You have a roommate?!
Joey: Okay. (They both walk off to watch for Rachel.)
Ross: Fine. Fine, but I want the record to show that I tried to take the high road, because in about five minutes Im gonna be saying (He laughs and points at Rachel sarcastically.)
Rachel: I'm not gonna tell you, but if you found out on your own, that would be okay and then we could talk about it. Right?
RACHEL: Oh yeah. I used to babysit him. Hey, how's his dad?
Rachel: Well, well, you said it was practice!
Rachel: Okay, maybe they are not funny to you
Rachel: Ohhh, I-I would enjoy that!
Rachel: This is totally your fault!
Rachel: You could.... say youre sorry to her mom.
Rachel: Dont call us that! (Storms away)
Joey: Monica and Rachel made out. (Giggles like a schoolboy and Monica glares at him.)
Ross: (in the accent again) Well, hello Rachel!
Rachel: Oh, name one stupid thing that is as stupid as this one!
Ross: (to Rachel) You see what men do! Dont tell me men are not nice! (points to Chandler) This is men!!
Rachel: Nothing. (Sits down.)
Rachel: Well, yes, we got married in Vegas and uh, and the names I think.
Rachel: Ugh, Ross! That was not a near death experience! That was barely an experience!
Ross: Oh well, since I have that whole history with Rachel, I guess Phoebe.