words in movies
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, everyone except Phoebe is there as Rachel enters carrying a magazine.]
Rachel: Hi!
Rachel: So, Im in my apartment doing the Soap Opera Digest crossword puzzle, and guess who the clue is for three down. (She hands the magazine to Joey.)
Rachel: So did they call you to tell you your names gonna be in this?
Rachel: Oh, come on Joey! You will totally keep it in check this time, and plus yknow the publicity would be really good for your career! And you deserve that! And if you do the interview you can mention, oh I dont know, gal pal Rachel Green?
Rachel: Okay, dont listen to him. Please?
Rachel: Come on! We will be there for you the whole time! Just remember gal pal Rachel Green. (Excited) Ha-ha! Im gonna be in Soap Opera Digest! And not just in the dumb crossword puzzle. (Looks at Joey.) Seriously, proud of you.
Rachel: Oh yeah, Id actually love a blueberry muffin and a chamomile tea.
[This starts another series of flashbacks about Joeys hobbies. The first one is from Episode 703: The One With Phoebes Cookies, Rachel is teaching Joey how to sail his boat, the Mr. Bowmont.]
Joey: (drinking a beer) Look at this clown! Just because hes got a bigger boat he thinks he can take up the whole river. (Yelling) Get out of the way jackass! (To Rachel) Who names their boat Coast Guard anyway?
Rachel: That is the Coast Guard.
[The next one is from Episode 609: The One Where Ross Got High, Rachel is describing her desert to Joey and Ross.]
Rachel: Its a trifle. Its got all of these layers. First theres a layer of ladyfingers, then a layer of jam, then custard, which I made from scratch. [Joey and Ross make impressed faces] Then raspberries, more ladyfingers, then beef saut�ed with peas and onions, [Joey and Ross look like somethings wrong.] then a little more custard, and then bananas, and then I just put some whipped cream on top!
[Time lapse, Ross and Joey are eating Rachels disaster.]
[Scene: The Hallway, Chandler and Rachel are on their knees with forks trying to salvage what they can of the cheesecake off of the floor.]
Rachel: Oh! Yay! Look! Theres a piece that doesnt have floor on it!
Rachel: Hey, come on now!
(Joey finishes climbing the stairs and sees them. Chandler and Rachel both stop and look up at him. Joey sits down on the step.)
Rachel: (interrupting him) Hi! Im gal pal Rachel Green, and if you want the dirt, Im the one you come too. This might be Joeys baby (rubbing her stomach), who knows? Im just kiddingSeriously, (leans into the cassette recorder Shelley is using) gal pal Rachel Green.
Rachel: (scoffs at him) Yeah, thats gonna get you into Soap Opera Digest. Well I (leans into the microphone again) I would just like to say that Joey truly has enriched the days of our lives.
Rachel: You too!
[They gang all lean back to listen better, and this starts another series of flashbacks. The first one is from Episode 214: The One With The Prom Video, Rachel has just found the bracelet that Joey gave Chandler, which is after he bought one to replace it.]
[Scene: Joey's apartment, Joey and Rachel are eating spaghetti in the living room while watching TV and Rachel drops some on the floor.]
Rachel: Oh, Joey! Sorry!
Rachel: Oh but look! Thats gonna leave a stain!
Rachel: Really?
Rachel: Ive never lived like this before.
(Rachel throws some of hers down.)
Joey: Wow, you are a good friend, 'course the audition was this morning, and I didn't get it. But that was a hell of a kiss. Rachel is a very lucky girl.
Phoebe and Rachel: Ewwww!!
Phoebe, Ross, and Rachel: (turning to look at Joey) Ewwww!!
(Suddenly Rachel clears her throat and the camera cuts to the rest of the gang staring at them. Needless to say Joey and Ross are shocked and slowly turn their heads to see the gang.)
[Another series of flashbacks begins with Episode 413: The One With Rachels Crush, Joey is telling Rachel and Phoebe how he picks up women.]
[The next one is from Episode 613: The One With Rachels Sister, Chandler has just opened the door to reveal a woman standing there.]
Woman: Hi, is Rachel here? Im her sister.
Rachel: Oh my God, Jill!
Jill: Oh my God, Rachel!
Rachel: This is Chandler. (Points at him.)
Rachel: And you know Monica and Ross!
Rachel: And thats Phoebe (points), and thats Joey.
Rachel: Dont!! (Joey backs away frightened.)
Rachel: Yeah!
Rachel: Wow! I cant believe they didnt put it in the part where you said you didnt watch soap operas.
Rachel: I dont want you to date her!
Rachel: What?!
Rachel: (starting to cry) Oh Ross, thank you. Thank you. (They hug.)
Rachel: Yeah. Just, if its possible, could you leave him somewhere and go have sex with another guy?
Rachel: Uh-huh.
Rachel: (pause) Wow! I dont know, maybe. Im
Rachel: Really? But Im being so unreasonable.
Rachel: Yeah?
Rachel: Oh I get it! A man duh!
Rachel: Right! (Heads for the bathroom.)
Rachel: God. (Sits down.) I have never been so uncomfortable in my entire life!
[Scene: Central Perk, time lapse, and Rachel is entering still pregnant.]
Chandler: (entering) Hey Phoebe! (To Rachel) Fatty!
Rachel: You. Like you havent done enough.
Rachel: Do you want me to come over there and sit on you? Cause Ill do it.
[Rachel leaves, and Ross follows her into the hall.]
Rachel: Oh no-no-no-no, no!
Chandler: You just said Of course youre my best friend. Would you please tell Rachel though?
[Time lapse, Rachel is coming back from Chandler and Joey's.]
Rachel: In a minute!!!
Rachel: (entering) All right, all right. Lets go!
Rachel: No, Im fine.
Rachel: Ross.
Rachel: Wait a minute! She just made a scene in the middle of the ceremony!
Rachel: Can I ask you something?
Rachel: Excuse me?!
Rachel: When Carol was pregnant with Ben
Rachel: Yeah.
Rachel: were you this irritating?
Rachel: (silently) Okay. (Pause) Seriously, breathe louder Ross! Thats great!
Ross: (to Rachel) Oh, youre nice to her.
Joey: I know. I know. And this is so much more complicated than it was for those guys. I mean, its Rachel for God sakes.
Rachel: Okay.
Rachel: She has the drugs!
Rachel: Well, we are ready to try anything.
(Rachel turns and looks at Ross.)
Rachel: Great! We will do all of those.
Rachel: Bye. (She closes the door and everyone tries to sympathize with her.)
Rachel: Hi!
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross and Rachel are there as Phoebe and Monica enter.]
Rachel: Why? Why today?
Rachel: Ill take that bet.
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Phoebe is giving Joey a massage as Rachel enters.]
Joey: Y-y-yeah! (As they start to leave, Rachel pauses and steals a vase with flowers in it.) Yeah you do. (They exit.)
Rachel: That proposal, at the planetarium
(Rachel turns her head to Ross and Phoebe and mouths, "No way.")
Rachel: All right, I gotta go to bed. Honey, I had such a wonderful time.
Rachel: Ross IWe tried all the spicy food. Its not working.
Joey: (entering, interrupting Rachel) Hey! I got great news!
Rachel: What?!
Rachel: Yeah.
Rachel: Okay.
Rachel: Okay! I got the keys! Okay! Okay!
Rachel: Hey, who's this little naked guy?
Phoebe: Is Rachel having the baby?
Rachel: (deadpan) Yes, the hard part is truly over.
Rachel: Ross, you stay here and talk, Im gonna go have a baby.
Rachel: Hi! (Ross is stunned.)
Rachel: Give her some money.
Rachel: (overhearing that) What-what about me?
Rachel: Yeah, but umm Yes, but, Fonzie was already cool, so he wasn't hurt, right?
Rachel: Oh, okay.
Rachel: Yeah well it looks great!
Rachel: Then, you will definitely get him back!
Rachel: Thank you. (Dr. Long exits.) Well, I guess we have some time to kill.
Rachel: Hi!
Rachel: How are you?
Rachel: Yeah it is.
Rachel: Thats so sweet.
Rachel: Oh.
Ross: This is Rachel. (Points at her.)
Marc: Oh hi Rachel.
Rachel: Oh you went to the movies by yourself?
Rachel: Joey, would you just come out here and stop being such a baby!
Dr. Green: Stay calm?!! How do you expect me to stay calm?! This is unacceptable Rachel! And I wanna know why?!! Is it because that punk Ross wont marry you?! Thats it! Is that it?!
Ross: (simultaneously as Rachel) Were not gonna do that.
Rachel: Oh. Oh wait no.
Rachel: No Ross! Ross! Ross! My child has no father!
Rachel: Hi!
Phoebe: Yeah. (Pause) Why arent you with Rachel?
Ross: (To Rachel) Hey. Whos that?
Rachel: Well they have uh, some unusual pet names for each other. Including umm, evil bitch and uh, sick bastard. Oh God oh! Contraction!
Joey: God. Hes crazy! Why doesnt he want to be with Rachel?
Rachel: New people.
Rachel: Joey. Joey, something feels weird and not good weird. I dontWhoa!! (Winces in pain.)
Mrs. Green: Now dont worry! Everythings gonna be okay. (Hugs Rachel while she is standing and Rachel is sitting, seeing this Monica decides to join in on the hugging by hugging Mrs. Green from behind her back.)
Rachel: Ooh! Ow!!
Rachel: Ross.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel is not doing the dishes. She hears someone coming up the stairs and quickly puts down her magazine and pretends like shes actually doing the dishes.]
Rachel: Hes looking at me.
Jill: No! Yknow what Rachel? Youre right, yknow he has been really nice to me.
Rachel: Hey, you guys! Guess what? Barry and Mindy are getting a divorce!
Amy turns to Ross and Rachel: Why does she keep making that noise?
Chandler: (in a serious, businesslike tone) Rachel, could I see you for a moment?
Rachel: Yeah it was.
Rachel: Oh! Ive got a lot of those too!
Rachel: Come on, its not a big deal! We stayed up all night coming up with a plan so that us dating will not be a problem.
Rachel: No, forget it! No way! I am not sending anymore Ralph Lauren clothes to prison. It is a waste.
Rachel: Oh! Im sorry! Are we having an 89-year-old? How about Dayton?
[Scene: The Semi-Private Labor Room, Dr. Long is checking on Rachel again.]