words in movies
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Joey is reading What to Expect When Youre Expecting as Rachel enters from her bedroom.]
Rachel: (looking at her fingers) Oh my God! Let me see that! (Grabs the book from him.)
Rachel: Hi!
Rachel: Oh Pheebs thats so sweet(Grabs a pair of pants)Ooh, those are so cute!
Monica: (entering) Oh good youre all here. Thanksgiving tomorrow, four oclock. (To Rachel) Oh, guess who I invited. Remember that guy Will Colbert from high school?
Rachel: No.
Rachel: Wow! I dont remember him. Honey, are you sure youre not talking about your imaginary boyfriend.
Rachel: Oh thats nice.
Monica: All right! Okay, its just Phoebe. Wills still on a diet, Chandler doesnt eat Thanksgiving food, and Rachels having her aversion to poultry.
Rachel: Remember I had to leave the room the other day when you had that roast chicken?
Joey: Thats right! Cause Im a Tribbiani! (To Rachel) And this is what we do! I mean we may not be great thinkers or world leaders, we dont read a lot or run very fast, but damnit! We can eat!
Monica: Hey, isnt weird to think about how next year at this time theyll be a little baby at the table? (Chandler turns around in horror.) (Seeing him) Rachels! But good to know where youre at!
Monica: Good. And Rachel Green too. (Will stops suddenly.)
Rachel: (entering, carrying a baking dish) Hi!
Will: (glaring at Rachel) Rachel Green.
Will: Look at her standing there with those yams! My two greatest enemies Ross: Rachel Green and complex carbohydrates.
Rachel: (sees Will) Oh my God Monica, who is that?
Rachel: Oh! I do not remember him! Wow! He's really got that sexy, smoldering thing going on. (We see Will angrily staring at Rachel.) Oh my God, hes Look at the way hes just staring at me. I think hes trying to mouth something to me, but I cant make it out. (Will mouths, "I hate you.")
(They sit down at the table and Will goes to talk to Rachel.)
Rachel: Hi! Will, right?
Rachel: Hi! Im Rachel Green.
Rachel: Really?! Arent you sweet! I gotta tell you though, I am, I am having the hardest time placing you. Oh-oh hang on! Did we umm, did we fool around at Lance Davis graduation party?
Rachel: Thank you!
Monica: (breaking it up) Uh Rachel? Rachel, why dont you sit here? (Next to Joey) And Will you sit way over there. (The other side of the table.)
Joey: (To Rachel) Its like me when I was born.
Rachel: All right, who would uh, like some yams? Will?
Rachel: What? (Joey starts offering Ross some turkey.) Oh yknow what? Can we please keep the chicken and the turkey and everything on the other side of the table? The smell is just yuck!
Rachel: Im sorry. What?
Will: I said it was typical. Typical of you, Rachel Green, Queen Rachel does whatever she wants in little Rachel land. (Does a fake hair flip.)
Rachel: Umm, Im sorry. Do you-do you have a problem with me?
Monica: (To Rachel) Apparently you were umm, a little mean to him in high school.
Rachel: Im-ImI had no idea. Im sorry. I
Rachel: Uh Will umm, I just want to say that Im real sorry for whatever I-I did to you in high school
Rachel: You had a club?!
Will: Thats right, The I Hate Rachel Green Club!
Rachel: Whoa! My God! So what, you all just joined together to hate me?! Who else was in this club?
Rachel: (To Ross) So you were in an I Hate Rachel club?
Rachel: So who else was in this club?
Rachel: So Ross, we went out for two years, and you never told me you were in an I Hate Rachel club.
Rachel: Okay Monica, did you know about this?!
Ross: co-founded. Co-founded the club was because I was insanely in love with you. Obviously I didnt handle it very well. But if you think about it the I Hate Rachel Club was really the I Love Rachel Club.
Will: Uh, except that it was really the I Hate Rachel Club.
Rachel: Okay. So what? You guys would just like get together and like just say mean things about me?
Rachel: What rumor?
Rachel: Ross!
Rachel: What?!
Rachel: (shocked) Oh my God!
Rachel: What?! You heard that?! (Goes and stands behind Joey.)
Rachel: Oh no!!!! Oh my God!! This is all making so much sense to me now! This is why Adam Carter wouldnt go out with me! This is why Billy Tratt would just stay in this region! (Motions to her breasts.) (Joey has turned around.)
Rachel: Monica, how come you never told me this?!
(Joey is now looking at Rachel, and since Rachels standing and hes sitting down and hes not looking at her face You get the picture.)
Rachel: Joey stop staring! Theres nothing there! Its not true!
Rachel: Oh! (Hits him and storms out.)
Rachel: (entering carrying a book) Okay! Okay! Listen to what Sean McMahon wrote in my yearbook senior year, "Dear Rach, youre such a good person." Not girl! Person!
Rachel: (reading what he wrote again) "Dear Rach, youre a great person. Sorry about your tiney-wienie." (Will laughs.)
Rachel: Yes!
Rachel: I dont care how long ago it was! You told people that I was half and half! Yknow what? I just want to point out I never did anything to hurt you in high school.
Rachel: What?
Ross: (shocked) (To Rachel) How did you know that?!!!!
Rachel: Yes it is! I saw you guys going at it behind the card catalog!
Rachel: Ohh, theres a picture of her in the yearbook actually.
Ross: Only when it was damp!! (To Rachel) I cant believe you-you told people about this?! Everybody knew?! Yknow what? (To Will) Im back in the club!
Rachel: WhPhoebe!!
Rachel: All right, yknowFine! You guys have your stupid little club, but I would just like to say is what you did to me is way worse than what I did to you! You gave me a tiney-wienie! (Will laughs.)
Monica: All right, listen youre just being silly. Rachel, even with that rumor you were one of the most popular girls in school and everyone wanted to be like you. One girl wanted to be like you so much she stuffed her pants with a Tootsie Roll!
Rachel: Wow
Monica: And Ross, if it werent for Rachels rumor I mean no one in high school would even know who you were. She put you on the map!
Rachel: Shes right.
Rachel: You can keep those pants by the way.
(Rachel joins Monica who is in the kitchen area, opening the wine bottle. Rachel checks that the doctors aren't listening, then lowers her voice anyway.)
Rachel: ...medium...hmm...any cookies left?
Rachel: Hey you guys, this is my sister Amy. This is Chandler, Joey, Phoebe and you know Mon.
Rachel: Oh, yeah. And uh, the best part though, when the uh, waiter spilled water down my back, I jumped up, and my boob popped out.
Mrs. Green: Well Rachel needs help with the baby.
Rachel: I hope youre going somewhere with this.
Rachel: Really?
Rachel: Thank you. (Hugs him.)
Ross: Oh. (Rachel and he start to stand up.)
(Rachel looks bored. At this point, Rossa figment of Rachel's imagination shows up on the balcony and starts talking to her.)
Rachel: You guys are gonna love meee! Okay, check it out, Thursday night, five tickets, Calvin Klein lingerie show, and you guys are coming with me. (theyre all silent and look away) Okay, I said that out loud right?
Rachel: (closing a book) Okay! Im ready.
Rachel: A card! A card! I pick a card!
Rachel: Uh, well, I think, I think he broke up with me.
Rachel: Okay. (watching the tape) Ooh, my! (Rachel jumps when the woman starts screaming) Woah! Why is that baby torturing that woman?!
Rachel: Well that is because your eye immediately goes to the big naked man.
Rachel: I didnt write it.
Rachel: Ross!
[Scene: The Hallway, Ross, Phoebe, and Rachel are discussing the note.]
Rachel: I am freaking out!
Rachel: That is seven days!
Rachel: Yeah but yknow what they say Mon, "Theres no such thing as bad press."
Rachel: My due date is in one week!
Rachel: Im serious.
Rachel: Honey, this is not your fault, just because you guys had a fight, it does not justify her sleeping with someone.
Rachel: (stopping him) Oh, wait Ross! Im sorry, one more thing!
Rachel: Really?! Oh my God! Im successful!
Rachel: (to everybody) All right, let’s get this party started, huh? Joey and Phoebe are gonna perform a little something for us.
Rachel: Oh.
Rachel: No-no-no! No, no, no, were not married.
Rachel: Yeah.
Rachel: Hi Pheebs!
Rachel: Oh yeah! You reallyYou look great.
Rachel: Okay, get ready to see some beggin!
Chandler: (To Rachel) Did you like me when we first met?
Rachel: But yknow umm, Rachel doesnt rhyme with draddle.
Rachel: So, you had a good day huh? Big commission; picked up a daddy.
Rachel: So you guys go, have a really good time.
Rachel: Oh okay, I see what youre doing there.
(Rachel holds her hand in order to support her head. Mr Zellner obviously overheard the conversation.)
Rachel: Ohh! (walking away from the window) Phoebe, this is all your fault! Now he loves her, hes gonna marry her, and this is all your fault.
Rachel: You like that? (She climbs on the barcalounger seductively, putting her knees next to Joey's hips.) Let's take this into high gear (She pulls the barcalounger lever and seat reclines. She puts one of her knees between his legs and begins to kiss his neck.)
Rachel: Im fine, but thats not important. Whats important is how was she?
Rachel: Hi! Youre back from your date!
Rachel: I dont want you to date her!
Rachel: What?!
Rachel: (starting to cry) Oh Ross, thank you. Thank you. (They hug.)
Rachel: Yeah. Just, if its possible, could you leave him somewhere and go have sex with another guy?
Rachel: Uh-huh.
Rachel: (pause) Wow! I dont know, maybe. Im
Rachel: Really? But Im being so unreasonable.
Rachel: Yeah?
Rachel: Oh I get it! A man duh!
Rachel: Right! (Heads for the bathroom.)
Rachel: God. (Sits down.) I have never been so uncomfortable in my entire life!
[Scene: Central Perk, time lapse, and Rachel is entering still pregnant.]
Chandler: (entering) Hey Phoebe! (To Rachel) Fatty!
Rachel: You. Like you havent done enough.
Rachel: Do you want me to come over there and sit on you? Cause Ill do it.
[Rachel leaves, and Ross follows her into the hall.]
Rachel: Oh no-no-no-no, no!
Chandler: You just said Of course youre my best friend. Would you please tell Rachel though?
[Time lapse, Rachel is coming back from Chandler and Joey's.]
Rachel: In a minute!!!
Rachel: (entering) All right, all right. Lets go!
Rachel: No, Im fine.
Rachel: Ross.
Rachel: Wait a minute! She just made a scene in the middle of the ceremony!
Rachel: Can I ask you something?
Rachel: Excuse me?!
Rachel: When Carol was pregnant with Ben
Rachel: Yeah.
Rachel: were you this irritating?
Rachel: (silently) Okay. (Pause) Seriously, breathe louder Ross! Thats great!
Ross: (to Rachel) Oh, youre nice to her.
Joey: I know. I know. And this is so much more complicated than it was for those guys. I mean, its Rachel for God sakes.
Rachel: Okay.
Rachel: She has the drugs!
Rachel: Well, we are ready to try anything.
(Rachel turns and looks at Ross.)
Rachel: Great! We will do all of those.
Rachel: Bye. (She closes the door and everyone tries to sympathize with her.)
Rachel: Hi!
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross and Rachel are there as Phoebe and Monica enter.]
Rachel: Why? Why today?
Rachel: Ill take that bet.
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Phoebe is giving Joey a massage as Rachel enters.]
Joey: Y-y-yeah! (As they start to leave, Rachel pauses and steals a vase with flowers in it.) Yeah you do. (They exit.)
Rachel: That proposal, at the planetarium
(Rachel turns her head to Ross and Phoebe and mouths, "No way.")
Rachel: All right, I gotta go to bed. Honey, I had such a wonderful time.
Rachel: Ross IWe tried all the spicy food. Its not working.
Joey: (entering, interrupting Rachel) Hey! I got great news!
Rachel: What?!
Rachel: Yeah.
Rachel: Okay.
Rachel: Okay! I got the keys! Okay! Okay!
Rachel: Hey, who's this little naked guy?
Phoebe: Is Rachel having the baby?
Rachel: (deadpan) Yes, the hard part is truly over.