words in movies
Ross: Well, were all here! I guess we should get going!
Ross: (to Rachel) So, were off.
Ross: Thanks! (They hug.) Ugh, I cant believe youre not gonna be there!
Chandler: Okay. Listen-listen, were not gonna have to walk this way the entire time are we?
[Scene: Another street, somewhere along the River Themes, Ross, Emily, and Monica are walking to where theyre gonna get married. Emily is relating the troubles with the caterer.]
Emily: and that was all before 10 oclock. The caterer rang and said it was going to be Chicken Kiev instead of Chicken Tarragon. And then the florist phoned to say there arent any tulips. Oh, and the chilliest has carpel-tunel syndrome. Were not gonna be
Monica: Yeah, yknow, but something like salmon which would be so much more elegant than the chicken. And, you wouldnt have to worry about the salmonella. (Ross pushes her.) So, I cant wait to see this place youre getting married!
Emily: I still cant believe theyre tearing it down. It really is the most lovely building youll ever see. I mean its over (She stops suddenly, when she sees that demolition has already started.) Oh my God!
Chandler: I think its great. Its great. Yknow, theyre thinking of changing the name of this place.
Chandler: All right, look, youre not really gonna buy that are you? Dont you think youve embarrassed me enough for one day?
The Vendor: (looks around) Theyre all tourists.
Chandler: All right, look, if you insist on wearing that, in public, yknow, youre gonna spend the rest of the afternoon all by yourself.
Joey: Oh yeah? (Puts the hat on.) If youre gonna make me choose between you and the hat? I choose the hat.
Ross: The only thing I understand is; postponing it is not an option. This is when were getting married.
Phoebe: Uh, only if you have the hiccups too. Yeah, the pictures are for you, the water and the chocolate is for me. I just didnt feel like getting up. Okay, Im gonna show you a picture of Ross. Okay? And youre going to remember all of the bad things about him. All right? Really focus on his flaws.
Phoebe: Okay. Umm, before we get started, I just wanna say for the record that I love Ross, I think hes such a great guy. Here. (Hands her the picture, Rachel grabs it out of her hand.) Okay, now, close your eyes. And imagine that youre with Ross okay and imagine that youre kissing him. And youre-youre running your hands all over his body. And then you run your hands through his hair, but eew-oh gross its some kind of grease, itsuck! Hah?
Ross: Hey-hey, since youre the fix-it lady, heres a pickle, what do you do when the bride says she doesnt want to have the wedding at all?
Monica: Oh my God. Youre even dumber than I am!
Phoebe: Ohh, theyre having a great time with their Aunt Phoebe! Aunt Rachel hasnt been helpful at all. So, do you miss me?
Phoebe: So youre not homesick yet?
Phoebe: What?! What do you mean youre going to London?
Phoebe: Thats not why youre going! Youre going because you hope hes gonna say, "Yeah, I love you too, Rach. Forget that British chippy."
Phoebe: No! Because hes in love with the British chippy! Look, Rachel, if you go, youre just gonna mess with his head and ruin his wedding! Yknow, its too late! You missed youre chance! Im sorry, I know this must be really hard, its over.
Mr. Geller: Ohh forget it. Too hell with tradition, were happy to do it.
Mrs. Waltham: Well, if youre on e of Rosss best friends, why arent you here?
Chandler: (Continuing his toast.) And Im sure were all very excited that Ross and Emily are getting married at Montgomery Hall. I mean to think, my friend getting married in Monty Hall. (No reaction from the people.) Ohh, come on!! Monty Hall!! Lets make a Deal!! Come on, you people!! All right, forget it!! Congratulations, Ross and Emily. (He sits down.)
Rachel: Okay, you know what/ Youre going to have to call that plane and tell them to swing around and come and pick me up.
Passenger: If youre planning on doing that throughout the entire flight. Please tell me now. So that I could that a sedative...or perhaps slip you one.
Joey: Ahh Pheebs, you know youre still my number one girl.
Passenger: You say you love this man, yet youre about to ruin the happiest day of his life. Im afraid I have to agree with you friend Pheebs.. This is a..this is a...terrible, terrible plan.
Mrs. Geller: Theres nothing to discuss. Were not paying for your wine cellar.
Ross: You know what, I think weve had all the bad luck were going to have. (He hugs her.)
Ross: The nurse said theyre bringing in another woman.
Nurse: I think I know who youre talking about.
Ross: People ask me why were not together, I just dont know what to tell them.
Dr. Long: Actually, I think youre ready to go to the delivery room.
Ross: Sweetie youre doing great.
The Cooking Teacher: Were all beginners here. Nobody knows what theyre doing.
Rachel: Oh, just tell us! Were not gonna want it!
Ross: Okay! (Walks away from him.) Umm, I uh, Im your teacher. Im sorry, youre-youre a student and I-and I like women. In spite of what may be written on the backs of some of these chairs.
Ross: True, but youre allowed to be unreasonable. Youre having our baby.
Ross: Well I, close your eyes, I just think youre gonna like this a little better, cause, close-close... (He gets some more on the brush)
Monica: I cant believe were here.
Chandler: Well now-now youre just talking crazy.
Phoebe: Okay thats even sadder. Look, I know, I know what I got myself into, its just that now that theyre in me its like, its like I know them yknow, I mean-I mean, its just not gonna be easy when these little babies have to go away.
Joey: Okay, firstfirst of all, you want to make it look spontaneous. I look down (Looks down), look down, keep looking down; then I look up. (Looks up and smiles.) See? All right, now you try. Look down (Chandler looks down), youre looking down, keep looking down
Frank: Yeah, y'know I feel like I can really talk to you cause y'know youre my sister, y'know.
Monica: Okay, all right, I think youre great, I think youre sweet, and youre smart, and I love you. But you will always be the guy who peed on me.
Rachel: Yknow youre-youre probably wondering about the old date on there.
Monica: Yeah, were trying to get pregnant.
[Scene: The Semi-Private Labor Room, theyre brining in yet another woman.]
Ross: Were so lucky.
Joey: Whyre you so tired?
Joey: Whoa-whoa-whoa! Youre not gonna use the pay phone to call work, are ya?
Woman: Well you can have the suite if you want. We dont care about where we stay. Were here to celebrate our love together. We dont have to get free stuff. We just want to be together.
Pete: Look, forget the check, okay. (rips up the check) I like you. I think youre great. Come on, what do you say?
Janine: I dont know, theyre just a little blah!
Joey: And youre Okay with that?
Rachel: Youre never leaving the apartment!
Chandler: Were moving to Tulsa
Chandler: Yes, 98.6. Youre gonna be fine.
Melissa: You do now. Youre having dinner with me.
Monica: What the Yes youre too late! Where was all this three years ago?!
Kyle: Oh hey! Good, youre both here.
Joey: Hey! Great, youre home! Guess what Phoebe got me for Christmas! (Starts drumming.)
The Porsche Owner: Listen, I-I-I dont come to this city much so I dont know if youre crazy or this is some kind of street theater, but could I have my keys.
Joey: All right thats it! Youre yelling and I dont see you taking your top off! I quit!
(During the mutual contraction Julie takes a moment to point out theyre having a contraction at the same time.)
Ross: Okay. Now-now-now should I climb down your front so were face to face or-or should I climb down your back so were-were butt to face.
Monica: What are you talking about? We�re all together right now.
Phoebe: Oh okay, well Im sorry to bother you. Bye-bye. (Hangs up the phone.) Yeah youre right, this is easy.
Joey: Were gonna climb Mt. Everest!
Phoebe: Well, I guess they�re not coming. You wanna just order?
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey, Monica, and Rachel are sitting on the couch and Ross is sitting on the chair, and theyre all talking.]
Rachel: Okay, in about ten seconds youre gonna see him kiss me.
Monica: I know that youre new at this, but this is completely unacceptable bath decorum.
Joey: No, they�re comin�, we�re waitin� right here.
Rachel: (entering carrying a book) Okay! Okay! Listen to what Sean McMahon wrote in my yearbook senior year, "Dear Rach, youre such a good person." Not girl! Person!
Rachel: Oh they are nice. We-we custom-make tuxedos for celebrities and then when theyre done with them they just send em back.
Ms. McKenna: Then, problem solved. Chandler will be running our office in Tulsa. Youre gonna love Oklahoma.
The Waiter: Actually were out of the lobster ravioli. (Putting Joeys menu under his arm.)
Waiter: Oh, they�re both exclus�
Ross: Rach, I think youre reading a little too much into it.
Monica: Honey, umm I-I love you, (laughs) but umm, if you call our wedding a party one more time, you may not get invited. Okay? (Laughs) Listen, we could always earn more money, okay? But uh, were only gonna get married once.
Rachel: Oh my you think Im a pushover. Well wait, watch this, you know what? Youre not invited to lunch. What do you think of that? I think thats pretty strong, thats what I think. Come on, Monica, lets go to lunch. (She leaves)
Ross: Well youre gonna be a wonderful grandma. (They hug.)
Ross: Youre fast and irresponsible. That adds up to a bad driver.
Ross: (quietly confident) I think we do. Why dont we go inside? (They go inside.) Look uh, I know why youre here.
Chandler: No, no, no-no-no. I smoked for years, then I quit. Right now, I can�t remember why. (to everyone:) You�re not allowed to smoke in this office. Not right?
Monica: Honey, you�re just in time, I�m about to sing another song!
Joey: Look, Ross, really its-its no big deal. Yknow you wear a white coat, I wear a blue blazer, if that means we cant be friends at work, then so be it. Yknow, hey I understand. Yknow? Hey, when Im in a play and youre in the audience, I dont talk to you, right? So its yknow, its uh, its cool. Ill see you tomorrow. (Leaves)
Ross: (To Monica) Youre drunk! Mom and dad are gonna be maaaaadd! Maybe Im a little drunk.
Monica: You say Thank you very much, and then you buy me something pretty. Come on, were gonna put are hands in this bowl, and were gonna start squishing the tomatoes.
The Director: Look Joey, theres nothing I can do. Besides, youre probably gonna be out by four anyway. Weve just got one short scene. Its just you and Richard, and God knows hes a pro. Youll be fine. (Walks away and sees Richard entering.) Morning Richard.
Joey: Hey. Hey look I am still Joey, okay. Flowers theyre just, you know, theyre nice to look at. And that happens to be a picture by a famous artist. Of a famous baby.
Phoebe: No, I know, Im just nervous. Y'know its just y'know Moms dead, dont talk to my sister, Grandmas been sleeping a lot lately. Its like the last desperate chance to have a family, y'know, kinda thing. Youre so sweet to wait with me.
Monica: Oh, about five minutes. Right now theyre interviewing his opponent. Apparently he trains by going to Iran and pulling the arms off thieves.
Matt: Yeah, shes trying to waft the smell across the hall to get us to come hang out in her new place, and were sitting there eating pizza and I think it was you (Points to Lisa) that said
Monica: What?! Youre crazy! Theres nothing sexual about the noises I make!
Melissa: Oh wow, Ray-ray I have no idea what youre talking about.
Monica: You know what? This has been kind of a girlie day. Youre right, Im sorry.
Joey: Oh my God Pheebs! Youre gonna have a baby?
Hold Voice: Thank you for your patience, youre the next caller.
{Transcribers note: This is where the opening credits are, but theyre not the usual opening credits. Oh no! These credits are based on the world that would have been created had all of the above actually happened. It starts out with all of them at the fountain sitting on the couch as Fat Monica runs up and sits on the arm of the couch, tilting the whole thing towards her. It then goes on to show Rachels still a shop-aholic and with Barry. Fat Monica is sweating while cooking and dancing while eating a donut. Phoebe as the Wall Street shark smoking while on two cell phones. Then theyre dancing in the fountain. Joey entering as Dr. Drake Remoray and meeting a groupie. Chandler trying to write as a bird does its business on his shoulder and falling asleep while typing. Ross doing some kara-tay and trying to get Carol into bed. And finally, some more dancing in the fountain, them all flexing, and the turning out the lamp and shutting off all the lights bit from the first season. Just remember one thing, this is an alternate universe. Everything from every other episode doesnt apply, for instance, Ross and Rachel have no history. And in fact have not seen each other in years in this world.}
Doug: Bing! Were all set for tonight, 8 oclock.
Ross: (To Joey) I know, I wasnt finished. (Joey motions him to finish.) (Yelling at the street) But dont worry! Were gonna go down the fire escape!!
Phoebe: (thinking to herself) Chandlers knees. Chandlers ankles. Chandlers ankle hair. (notices the clock) Oh no. (to Rick) Okay, youre all set.
Rachel: Well, were a little early, the lecture doesnt end for 15 minutes.
Joey: Dude, youre not even man enough to order the channel that carries the sport.
Rachel: Are you okay? Youre not blinking.
Phoebe: Okay! Okay! (Puts it out and comes out of the bathroom.) Im so glad youre here.
Mrs. Geller: Oh I wish youre grandmother had lived to see this.
Monica: Im Catwoman, who wants to borrow the dress when youre too big for it.
Rachel: What? This-this, no, oh no, no-no-no, this is notthats-thats not what it is. See, see, okay, I work in fashion, see and-and, this is a real dress actually. Its-its, theyre-theyre wearing it in Milan, so part of my job is too wear the clothes, and then I see how people respond, and then I report back to my superiors at Bloomingdales, so And obviously in uh, in-in this case, (She grabs a pen and paper) I am going to report back, "USA not ready."
Monica: (stopping him) Sit down! Were winning!
Joey: Well, Id like to think there was something for everyone. Look, I know youre casting for this new show
Chandler: Were moving to Tulsa! (Makes a excited expression on his face)
Rachel: Oh, I know it. Youre right. Thats not sexy. Oh Oh! (Drops a fork on the floor.) Whoops! Oh, I seem to have dropped my fork. Let me just bed over and get it. (Tries too, but cant quite seem to make it.) Oh God!
Mona: Umm, I-I thought we were moving forward and now youre-youre sending me all these mixed signals. What are you trying to tell me?
Monica: (yelling after them) I cant believe youre gonna have sex on my engagement night!!
Rachel: Im so glad, Im so glad you shared. (Feeling his shoulder.) And Im glad that youre done. What do you say we umm (Nods in the direction of the bedroom.)
Ross: I cant believe in four weeks theyre gonna be married!
Monica: Look at me! My big concern is whats real?! (Finally realises) Oh my God. Were really sad, arent we?
Ross: I dont think so! Youre just giving me Ruth so youll get to name it when its a boy, and thats when youll swoop in and name him Heath or Blaine or Sequoia.
Chandler: Were on a semi-first name basis.
Monica: Oh, Id like a latte. Oh yknow what? If youre gonna talk about me, Im gonna go with you.
Joey: Youre gonna mess it up let me do it.
Joey: Nah, its okay. Right, Gunther? (Winks at him as if theyre in on a secret together.)
Rachel: I feel like were the only two people in the world. (She sets down her wine class, picks up a walnut, and knocks another one on the floor.) Oops. Sorry. (She reaches down to pick it up and Ross hands it to her. Ross is hiding under the couch and causes Rachel to scream.)
Joey: What?! All rightHey! Dont look at me! Youre the one who wanted to come up and look for some stupid Burger King comet!
[Cut to Phoebe in Rosss new apartment looking at Monica and Chandler and what theyre about to do in The One Where Everybody Finds Out.]
Chandler: Well, were-were hanging out in here!