words in movies
(She takes her hand off Erica. Ross enters the room)
Ross: Hey!
Ross: Hey Erica, welcome back to town! (pause) Wow, look how big you've gotten.
Ross: Right, no, I understand.
Ross: No, no, I knew (he stares at her breasts).
Monica (to Ross): Okay, well, stop staring at them.
Ross: She brought them up! (pause) I didn't realize you were coming back so soon!
Ross: Hotel? Why isn't she staying with you guys?
Ross: Erica, those things aren't free. In fact they have one of the highest mark-ups of any consumer product...
Monica: Ross! She's giving us her baby. She can eat you if she wants.
Ross: Oh man, I can't believe you guys are leaving this place.
Ross: No, no. This will always be your place. It would be too sad. Plus, how much a month does it cost to feed Joey?
Ross: Hey, is Chandler here? We talked about catching a movie.
Ross: Mhm, (he balance things) packing - sexy cheerleader comedy.
(Ross takes the tape roll she's handing him and walks to the guest room while mocking Monica's voice)
[Scene: Guest room. Joey has his head wrapped in bubbled wrap and Chandler is punching him. Ross enters the room.]
Ross: What are you guys doing?
Joey: Try it, I can't feel a thing! (Ross starts punching him too)
Monica: All right, Rachel's party is in a couple of hours and there's a lot to do. Now, Ross, you got Geller blood, you're in charge of these yahoos!
Ross: You got it! (Monica leaves, Ross closes the door). All right, she's right, we gotta get serious. (He grabs a bag of styrofoam peanuts) Let's put styrofoam peanuts down his pants and kick him!
Chandler: No, no, no, guys. She's right. We should get to work. I'll take stuff out of the closet, Joey you pack 'em and Ross you re-pack whatever Joey packs.
Ross: Chandler, you don't have a sister so you can't understand how much this bums me out.
Ross: Bumming hard, guys, bumming hard.
[Scene: Monica's apartment. Phoebe and Ross enter the room.]
Ross: Yeah? Yeah, where is it?
Ross: Rock on!
Ross: Hey, where's Rach?
Ross: Great.
Ross: Here she is!
Ross: Oh, man! I can't believe she's actually leaving. How am I gonna say goodbye to Rachel?
Chandler: I know, she's been such a big part of my life. And it feels like when Melrose Place got cancelled. (Ross and Joey looks puzzled) I mean... oh, forget it. I miss Melrose Place!
Joey (to Ross): You know, I had a chance to stop her too!
Ross: Yeah?
Ross: Hey, what do you think they're doing in there?
Ross: (to Phoebe) Hey. What was that all about?
Ross: Are you kidding? Oh my God...
Phoebe: Yeah, I know, it's gonna be even worse for you... God... Ross, get ready to do some serious crying.
Ross: Oh, man, I'm not going to be able to handle this. (pause) Now I know how my students feel at the end of each year. And why they act out by giving me such bad evaluations.
Ross: (to Joey) Oh no, she took down Monica... And I'm the crier in the family. Oh God! I could be next. Maybe she won't talk with me if it looks like we're deep in converstation. Oh, so that thing you said about the thing. It really made me think about that other thing.
Ross: Well it's okay. Chandler is talking to her.
Monica: (to Ross) So, I guess you're next. You're ready?
Ross: I don't think so.
Ross: God! I can't believe she saved me for last. (looking out to the balcony) Why are they taking so long?
Ross: Okay, here we go...
Ross: Yeah...
Rachel: I think I'm gonna take off. (pats Ross on his back, but he looks very surprised)
Ross: Huh?
(She leaves the apartment and they all stare at Ross)
Ross: What? I don't get a goodbye?
[Scene: Monica's apartment continued... Phoebe, Chandler, Monica and Joey are sitting down and Ross is pacing up and down.]
Ross: Unbelievable. She says goodbye to everyone but me.
Ross: Well, it needs to be plicit.
Ross: No, I don't think so.
Ross: (annoyed) O-kay... I mean, don't I deserve anything? I mean, a few tears, a cursory hug? (Joey gives Ross a hug) NOT FROM YOU! (Joey lets go)
Phoebe: Ross, if you're this upset, you should go and talk to her.
Ross: THE HELL I DO!
(Ross takes big steps leaving for Joey and Rachel's apartment, where Rachel is going through her papers.)
Ross: I don't get a goodbye?
Ross: (talking agitated and angry) Everyone gets a goodbye but me? What have I got to do to get a goodbye, huh? Be best friends with you? Uh, go out with you? Have a baby with you? Oh wait a minute, wait a minute, I did all those things.
Rachel: Ross...
Ross: Oh no, maybe it's me, I'm just not giving you enough credit. Uh, I mean it is difficult to say goodbye to five people. Uh, goodbye, goodbye, goodbye, goodbye, good... (makes choking noises) IT'S PHYSICALLY IMPOSSIBLE. You know what? After all we've been through, I can't believe this is how you want to leave things between us. Have a, have a good time in Paris. (He leaves the apartment. Rachel looks kind of desperate.)
Monica: I hope Ross isn't too upset.
Ross: That's what it seemed like.
Ross: Fine, then why didn't you say something?
Rachel: Because it is too damn hard Ross. I can't even begin to explain to you how much I'm gonna miss you. When I think about not seeing you every day, it makes me not want to go... Okay, so if you think that I didn't say goodbye to you because you don't mean as much to me as everybody else, you're wrong. It's because you mean more to me. So there, all right, there's your goodbye... Oh!
Ross: Rach!
Ross: You keep, you keep... You can't...
(Ross walks over to her and starts to kiss her passionately. After a while Rachel backs out. She thinks a while and starts kissing him back.)
ROSS: Hey, tell me again, what do I do when Mr. Roper calls?
Ross: Hey! Hey! Hey! I get to choose my best man, and I want both you guys.
Ross: No, its my joke, its mine. You can call them, theyll tell you.
(Rachel laughs and Ross mocks her.)
Ross: Well, I kinda half to. I mean, because the thing is
Ross: Yeah, I know, so what? I mean, whos-whos to say? Does that me we-we cant do it? Look, huh, I was with Carol for four years before we got married and I wound up divorced from a pregnant lesbian. I mean, this, this makes sense for us. Come on! I mean, on our first date we ended up spending the whole weekend in Vermont! I mean, last night I got my ear pierced! Me! This feels right. Doesnt it?
Ross: Hey, I can handle it! All right?
Joey: Ross has some big thing to tell everyone.
Ross: Chandler!!! Chandler!!! (He opens the door to the apartment but is stopped by the chain; Chandler and Monica quickly stop making out and try to get dressed.) Chandler, I saw what you were doing through the window! Chandler, I saw what you were doing to my sister! Now get out here!
Monica: I cant do it! (Ross falls into Monicas room)
Monica: Yknow dad, Chandler is one of Rosss very best friends!
Ross: No, of course not! (Thinks) ...Yeah, yeah, it is.
Ross: Really?! So what would you say Pheebs? Stuff like uh, "Keep your mitts off my grub?"
Ross: Nothing, nothing. Lee-lo, the laundry's done.
(Phoebe tries to give her phone to Ross, but he won't take it. He mouths "no.")
Phoebe: All right. We're gonna take Clunkers to Rosss. We'll be back in a minute. (Gets up with Monica to do so.)
Ross: (entering, with the rest of the gang) What's going on?
Ross: Good. Maybe he can switch it back.
ROSS: How come it's not mixing with the water?
Ross: First of all, I'm not losing...
[Scene: Joey's apartment, Ross is telling Monica and Joey about his date with Elizabeth.]
Ross: So I guess you bought that book after we broke up huh?
Ross: (to Ben) I know, I know. Everybody, there's someone I'd like you to meet. Yeah. This is Ben. Ben, this is everybody.
Joey: It wasnt my ring! Its Rosss ring! Thats why I felt so bad Rach, because he was going to propose.
Ross: Look, I-I drew a sketch about how we're gonna do it. (Showing them) Okay Rach, (points to the sketch) that's you. That's the couch. (Points again.)
Rachel: Oh, I so wanted Ross to know first, but Im so relieved you guys know.
Ross: The eyes did still sparkle.
Ross: I'm just, I'm just glad I didn't miss my daughter's first words (goes back to checking the tickets).
ROSS: You know, you know, actually it's getting better. It is. It is. Let's not go. Anyone for Thcrabble?
Ross: That must be our alcohol and beers! (Gets up to answer it.)
Ross: All right, I'm coming out. Hey, can you turn the lights off.
Ross: I don't know, but I.. Look, even if she shoots me down, at least I won't spend the rest of my life wondering what would have happened. Where - where is my coat?!
Rachel: Oh, really, well Ross, you know what? I am a big girl. I don't need someone telling me what is best for me.
Ross first has a look of 'huh' then changes it to sarcastic happy: Thank you Amy.
Rachel: (on phone) Excuse me, Im sorry, Im gonna have to call you back, Ive got a Schemp in my office. (hangs up) (to Ross) What are you doing?
Ross: No you doy'know what, youre not gonna suck me into this.
[Scene: The Airport, Carol and Ross are waiting for Emily and Susan to deplane. A gorgeous woman walks by and they both turn to watch her go.]
Ross: I am a good kisser.
Ross: No! No! Oh my God. Did she get off the plane? Did she get off the plane?
(At that Ross plugs in some Christmas lights to light the place up.)
Rachel: Oh, great! Well, then I'm gonna take Emma to see him. I wonder why Ross said that he died.
Ross: Listen man, uh, I'm sorry the audition didn't go so well.
(He closes the door and turns to see Ross glaring at him.)
Ross: Um, Monica and I arent supposed to play football.
Ross: Pheebs, if you dont tell him, soon hes gonna be married, and then youre gonna hate yourself.
Ross: So I dont wanna be just anybody.
Ross: Then talk to him! He might be fine with it.
Ross: Yes! No-no! I know, I know what the list is! Mom! Look if you see Chandler, could you just let him know Im looking for him?
(Ross enters with a gift for the baby.)
Phoebe: All right well lets see, Ross is a good father, but Joey has a boatThis is hard!
Ross: Its no surprise that your winning, cause you got to pick first, so you got the better team.
Ross: (they shake hands) Hello, Susan. (To Carol) Good shake. Good shake. So, uh, we're just waiting for...?
Ross: No-no-no, Im saying we-we buy more of this (disposable cameras) at the gift shop, throw our tuxes back on, and take a few pictures. All we have to do is make sure not to get anybody elses faces.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, (And thats the last time for that line, no more Chandler and Joeys or Monica and Rachels, ever!) Joey and Ross are carrying the last table of Rachels. Rachel follows slowly, but is stopped by Monica.]
Monica: All right, so now that Ross knows can you tell us yknow how it happened? I mean, when did it happen? How many times did it happen?
Ross: Hey! Hey! Come on! You can! I know you can do this! Lets go!
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross, Chandler, and Phoebe are there. Joey is working.]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Phoebe and Ross are doing a crossword, Monica is cooking, and Chandler is still staring at his phone.]
Ross: Okay, okay, fine, youre right. Lets ah, lets take a break, (goes to the door) lets cool off, okay, lets get some frozen yogart, or something.. (opens the door)
Ross: Oh, no, it's no big deal, I mean, if I weren't doing this I'd just, you know, be at the gym working out.
Ross: Monica had such a crush on him. Yeah, she used to kiss his poster every night before she went to bed.
Ross: I know, it's crazy! We were just pushing Ben on the swings
(Rachel heads for Joey and Chandler's and Phoebe heads for the kitchen to find Ross.)
Ross: Hey, I brought the camera for Emma's video.
Ross: Yes, that's what I have. It's not on the board.
Ross: (to Monica) So, uh, Jules tells me you guys are going shopping tomorrow?
Phoebe: (running after her) Rach, its gonna be okay! (To Ross and Joey) You guys are the best!
Ross: Which is fine! Because you just turned(Removes two candles from the cake)twenty-eight!
Ross: Okay. (The girls leave.) (to Tommy) So uh, well, this-this is uh, this is awkward.
Ross: No. They swoop in and steal your jackpot.
[Scene: The delivery room, everyone except Rachel is there. Phoebe, Monica, and Ross are holding the babies.]
Joey: What's a matter Ross? What you're nervous about your speech?
Rachel: Theres not gonna be a wedding. Ross and I are not getting married.
Ross: Y'know what? It sounds so weird to say this but, I just had a great day with Janice!
Ross: I don't know. It was incredible. I mean, it just felt so right. When I was holding her, I mean, I never wanted to let her go. You know what? Yeah, I do. I wanna be together.
[Time lapse. Now everyone but Ross and Phoebe is back at Monica and Rachel's.]
Chandler: (notices something) Ross is wearing leather pants! Does nobody else see that Ross is wearing leather pants? (Pause, no one speaks.) Someone comment on the pants!
Ross: Damn it. It's never off the table. (he leaves the apartment)
Monica: (She opens the door.) Hey Ross. What's up bro?
Ross: That was just the pants on the couch. Umm, hey, do you, do you mind if I use your bathroom?
Rachel: No. (Ross is standing in the doorway.) A break from us.
Ross: Okay, and oh Im gonna need a bunch of extra keys. Apparently I give them away for no reason at all.
Mona: (interrupting him) Listen Ross, you dont have to apologize. I understand why you were there.
Ross: Oh hi! Hello! Uh, have you come to ask me some more paleontology related questions? Uhm... your grandmother's nickname, perhaps? (Now yelling) Aunt Margaret's pants size?
Chandler: But uh Ross, Ross is a great guy! I was roommates with him in college. Uh, funny story (He starts laughing then notices that Paul isnt happy.) Youre roommate in college died didnt he?
[Tag Scene: Central Perk.� Phoebe and Mike are on the sofa.� Ross enters.]
Ross: N No! We took a cab too, but I did test runs!
Ross: Okay, I think we're getting into a weird area here...
Ross: Actually she's a paleontology doctoral candidate, specializing in the centazoic era.
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross, Rachel, and Phoebe are there as someones cell phone starts to ring with one of those fancy ring tones.]
Monica, Moncia, have a happy Chanukah. Saw Santa Clause, he said hello to Ross. And plese tell Joey, Christmas will be snowy! And Rachel and Chandler, have err-umm-glander!!"
Ross: Oh great! Were going out again Saturday. But I just found shes also seeing some other guy.
Ross: Oh, I know. Yknow what, I never wouldve gotten this if it werent for you. No really, when Im with you Im-Im like this whole other guy, I love that guy! I mean, I love you too, a lot, but that guy! I-I love that guy!
Ross: I know and yet here you are all ready for the next date.
Cailin: Ross, Im gonna go.
Ross: You, you sure you need shoes? (Chloe nods her head) Okay. (reaches down and picks up a shoe)
[Scene: Ross's room. Charlie is sitting on the bed, while Ross is walking up and down nervously]
Chandler: Well, I think, I think Ross knows about me and Monica.
Ross: Come here (Removes Emma's hat) Oh! There she is! Hi!
Chandler: That means nothing to me. (To Ross) Come on!