words in movies
Ross: Yeah, it does sound interesting, I mean, to listen to a woman complain for two hours, I don't think it gets bett... (Ross starts snoring, faking to fall asleep)
Ross: What? How come that you don't have to go!
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross enters]
Ross: Hey!
Ross: Hey, you guys won't believe what I have to do for work today.
Chandler: Yes, but, Ross you chose a career of talking about dinosaurs.
Ross: (covering with his hand Chandler's face, like pretending he's not there) (to Monica) There're these two professors who are joining my department and I have to meet them here and show them around campus.
Ross: It's I just know they're gonna be a couple of windbags wearing tweed jackets with suede elbow patches.
Monica: (fingering her elbow): Ross?
Ross: (looking his elbow, where there's a patch) These aren't suede.
Charlie: (to Gunther) Excuse me, I'm looking for someone. You don't, by any chance, know a Ross Geller?
Ross: Hi, hi, I'm Ross Geller.
Ross: Oh, oh, that's, that's, that's nice.
Ross: Oh, no, it's no big deal, I mean, if I weren't doing this I'd just, you know, be at the gym working out.
Ross: Oh, ha, I wrote that in one minute.
Ross: (hitting Monica with his suitcase) (to Charlie) We should probably get going, you know, we got a lot of ground to cover.
Ross: I don't think so.
Ross: Oh, well he's obviously late and the rule in my class is "if you can't come on time, then don't come at all". (pause) An option that many of my students use. (pause) Shall we?
Ross: You know what, he's a big boy, I'm sure he'll find us, ok?
Ross: Oh, damn it!
[Scene: Ross, Charlie and Professor Spafford are sitting at the table in a restaurant]
Ross: (very bored, he tries to avoid the conversation speaking to Charlie) So, where did you get your undergraduate degree?
Ross: (to Charlie) Oh, it's not over!
Ross: So basically all nuts?
Ross: I've lost the will to live.
Ross: What?
Ross: Oh... ok, fine. But... ehm... I just have one question for you, ehm... (aping Professor Spafford) When we exit should we walk, or run, or prance, or stroll...
Ross: (entering with Charlie) Oh, hey you guys! This is Charlie! Charlie, this is Phoebe and my sister, Monica.
Ross: Yeah, Charlie is gonna be joining my department.
Ross: (to Phoebe) Ranion's theory of species variegation?
Monica: (to Ross) So, did you two have fun?
Ross: Oh my God, she's great! I mean, we-we have so much in common and she's just cool, and funny...
Ross: Really? Wh-what's wrong?
Ross: I'm sorry, Rachel, this is Charlie Wealer, she's a collegue.
Ross: (looking at them) Wh-what's going on?
Ross: No, I arranged that...
(cut to Ross and Charlie)
Ross: (to Charlie) So, eh... it's probably gonna be hard for you to leave Boston, huh?
Ross: Ooh... so sad... Still, it can't be easy for you to leave Harvard? Especially after working alongside a Nobel Prize winner like Albert Wintermeyer?
Ross: You... you dated Albert Wintermeyer?
Ross: ... And you called him Alby!? (laughs) I mean that's like... like calling Albert Einstein... er... Alby...
Ross: Eh, you think? I mean, you went out with a guy who improved the accuracy of radiocarbon dating by a factor of 10!
Ross: (very interested) Oh! like what?! (Charlie looks at him confused, but smiling) Oh I'm sorry, I don't mean to pry... it's just that this must be what regular people experience when they watch "Access Hollywood".
Ross: Who is intimidating to a guy who won the Nobel Prize?
Ross: (a little suprised) Two? Wha...? Don't tell me you dated Benjamin Hobart
Ross: Oh my God! Have you ever been in a relationship with someone who hasn't won the Nobel Prize?
Ross: Oh yeah? no, no Nobel Prizes for him?
Ross: Huh... huh... what a loser! Some more wine? (takes the half-full glasses and goes to the counter)
Phoebe: Hey Ross!
Ross: (sarcastically) Oh Great! After I finish my wine I'm going to blow my... eh. average-sized brains out.
Ross: She... she only dates geniuses and Nobel Prize winners. Oh my God, at the chinese restaurant earlier today, I put chopsticks in my mouth and pretented to be a woolly mammoth.
Ross: Of course you would, your brains are smaller than mine!! (Rachel nods) Man, I can't compete with the guys she goes out with, they are so out of my league! oh my God!
Ross: Oh much, much worse. I did my impression of Joan Rivers as one of the earliest amphibians... (gestures with his hands and says in an impression voice?) "Can we walk"? (Phoebe starts laughing) Oh, you... you like that?
Ross: What? (turns around to look at Rachel)
Rachel: Come on! I think this is funny! (Ross leaves)
[Scene: The roof, Joey is walking towards Ross with a guy]
Joey: Hey Ross, this is one of my co-stars, Dirk. (To Dirk) Dirk, this is my good friend Ross. (Ross and Dirk shake hands)
Ross: Nice to meet you.
Ross: Oh, I'm no actor, I'm a professor of palaeontology.
(Ross looks annoyed hearing that even Dirk's character won a Nobel prize)
Joey: Hey Ross, listen, Dirk was wondering about the woman that you brought and if you guys were together, or...
Ross: Oh, well no, but I mean, she only goes out with really, really smart guys.
Ross: I'd lead with that.
Ross: Just some boys gave me their phone numbers.
[Scene: At the counter. Ross is sitting there, drinking. Phoebe approaches him.]
Phoebe: Hey Ross! So listen, about you and the dinosaur girl, are you really just gonna let a couple of Nobel prizes scare you off? What is that, come on, a piece of paper?
Ross: It's actually a 1,000,000$ prize.
Ross: Yeah, maybe. I do have my whole career in front of me. I mean, I can still win a Nobel prize. Although the last two papers I've written were widely discredited.
Ross: And sexy.
Ross: Yeah, you're right, thanks Pheebs, I'm gonna go find her.
Ross: Stop going through my stuff (walks away)!
Ross: (to Rachel) Hey Rach, have you seen Charlie anywhere?
(Rachel just stands there staring at Joey and Charlie in silence. After a while, Ross turns around and sees them.)
Ross: I'm smarter than him!
Ross: (whispering) It was ok...
Ross: Joey, you shouldn't lie on your résumé.
Ross: (he enters) Hey.
Ross: You guys know where Rachel is?
Ross: Hey!
Rachel: Ross...
Ross: All right, you know that one was coming, but that doesnt mean you have unagi. (Does the finger thing.)
Ross: What? She's gonna eat all those cookies?
Ross: Oh my God.
Ross: Is-is he ok?
Rachel: What? Ross and Charlie? (Joey nods) Wow! She's really making her way through the group, huh? Ah, who am I to talk?
Ross: Oh!
Mona: No, its still wet. Yknow what? Let me get it out before it sets. Ooh, I have something you can wear. Here. (Hands him Rosss shirt.)
Ross: I'm feeling better.
Rachel: Oh, hey, I have an idea. Why don't we play rock-paper-scissors, and whoever loses goes in first. (they all agree) Ready? (they do the rock-paper-scissor thing with they hands and Rachel has paper, Phoebe and Ross both have rock, while Joey is doing a strange upward wiggling with his fingers. They all look a him confused).
Ross: Did the TV wake you?
Ross: I'm not scared of him, I'm really sick!
Rachel: Ross, please, don't be so scared of him!
Ross: Well, I came with Rachel, who should be back any second! (pause) So what's new?
Ross: Right, is it painful?
Ross: Nope, just the one. RACH!
Ross: Hey!
Ross: Wow.
Ross: Sorry. (Rachel sits on her bed). You ok?
Ross: Oh, yeah. Emma's doing great.
MONICA: Fortunately, it is me. And, they made me head of purchasing, thank you very much. Anyway, I just ran into Ross and Chandler downstairs, and they think we should go out and celebrate. You know, someplace nice.
Ross: What? No, no! Hey, hey, hey look...
Ross: Sure!
Ross: Oh, of course...
Ross: Me too. Come here. (They hug)
Ross: I I do, I do not love Rachel. Im gonna tell her right now about the whole thing so we can get this marriage annulled as fast as possible. Okay? Would I do that if I loved her?
Ross: No-no-no, no, umm, actually American surprise parties are-are-are very short. Its usually, "Surprise!" And then, "Oh my God, Im so surprisedgood-bye!"
Ross: I'll see you in the morning (he leaves).
Rachel: (singing) Love to love ya baby! Ow! Love to love ya baby! Ow! (There's a knock on the door, she turns off the music, puts on her robe, and goes to answer the door.) Love to love ya, baby! (There's another knock.) Darnit! (Looks through the peephole and turns on the lights.) Ugh. (She opens the door to Ross who's leaning against the door jam.)
(Ross stops the clock, signifying the end of the lightning round.)
Ross: You sure you're alright?
Monica: It's some of Richard's hair! (holds it close to Ross) What do I do with this?
Ross: You've been quiet all morning. Is everything okay?
Ross: (knew this was coming) There it is... (he comes back)
Ross: Hey, I was looking out for you.
ROSS: No, but, but I wanna be with you in spite of all those things.
Rachel: (To Ross) So you were in an I Hate Rachel club?
Phoebe: It's so weird seeing Ross and Rachel with a baby. It's just so grown up.
Ross: (waking up) What? (notices that there is now a beautiful woman sitting next to him)
Ross: High collar and baggy pants say Im a pro.
Ross: Yeah, anything goes, except ah, eye gouging and fish hooking.
RACH: Oh, look at me, look at me. Oh, I'm on a date with a really great guy, all I can think about is Ross and his cat and his... Julie. I just want to get over him. gosh, why can't I do that?
Ross: Thank you. I'm glad you agree.
Ross: So uh... I guess I wanna take off.
Ross: Emma's down for the night.
Ross: Oh, no problem.
Ross: Yeah... Yeah, that's true.
Ross: Even if we want it really bad.
Rachel: ...Ross?
Ross: Yes?
Ross: Yeah.
Ross: ...Valentine's day...
Ross: Uhm, right!
Ross: ...I hate waste.
Ross: (on the phone) No-no-no, it's just a bit sudden. (Listens) No, it's great. Okay? I'm totally on board. I love you too, all righty. Bye. (Hangs up.)
Ross: Oh, that'd be great! Okay, but if you do, make sure it seems like you're there to see him, okay, and you're not like doing it as a favour to me.
Ross: (entering) Hey, you guys... I have great news.
ROSS: Hey, here's a theme: Come on in, live like bacon.
Ross: No, no. I-I'm good.
Ross: I'm up for tenure.
Monica: And Dad, yknow that mailman that you got fired? He didnt steal your Playboys! Ross did!
Ross: You too! What are the odds?
KEVIN: All right. It's no big deal. BILL: So, she has a boyfriend. What is your situation? RACHEL: Oh, well, it's complicated. I don't actually have a boyfriend.� But um. . . BILL: Then, can I have your number? RACHEL: (pause) I'm sorry, no. BILL: Okay. (They start to walk away.) RACHEL: Oh sure.� (She pulls a business card from her purse and writes on it.) PHOEBE: (Reading the card.) Oh my God, you're giving your real number. BILL: Okay, thanks. I'll give you a call later tonight. RACHEL: Great. BILL: Bye PHOEBE: Bye. (The guys leave.) Wow. So, that's great. You, Bill, Ross, and Emma are going to be so happy together. What were you thinking?
Rachel: Oh, it was great! We got everything that we needed! Oh and Ross, almost got something that wasnt on the list. A whore.
Phoebe: Ross...
[Cut to London, we sit Ross sitting outside Emilys apartment. We hear Emilys phone ring with amazing clarity. Apparently, sound travels quite easily through the walls of British buildings. Anyhoo, Ross looks around for the ringing phone and in the meantime Emilys answering machine picks up and once again with amazing clarity we hear Emily say ]
Ross: This is the single greatest day of my professional career. Gunther, six glasses!
Ross: He-he was with me umm, were playing a little game, yknow? Hide and seek.
Ross: I made a man twice my size cry. I mean, I havent done that since I was four and I washed my dads Porsche with rocks.
[Ross and Chandler get up and go into Rachels old room.]
Chandler: To Ross!
Ross: Rach, I'm so sorry.
Ross: ...that center around work.
All (except Rachel): Ross!
Ross: Awoh, thats right. Are-are you gonna be okay?
Ross: Great. I feel like an idiot.
Ross: Yeah, none of us have to deal with pressure at our jobs.
Rachel: (to Ross) Could you please get her attention?
Ross: Kind of inappropriate, don't you think?
Chandler: Because, if Santa and the Holiday Armadillo? (Ross nods) ...are ever in the same room for too long the universe will implode. Merry Christmas!
Rachel: (annoyed) Ross, what is taking you so long?
Joey: What about her? They've only been going out for two weeks. Ross has been in love with you for like 10 years.
Mrs. Geller: Chandler! Youve been Rosss best friend all these years, stuck by him during the drug problems. (Ross gets disgusted.) And now youve taken on Monica as well. Well, I dont know what to say. Youre a wonderful human being.
Ross: Um uh Were-were just having this baby together but uh, uh thats all.
Rachel: I'm fantastic. You remember Ross?
Ross: I hate that guy.
Ross: Yes, you're right. Still somebody must have seen it... I mean, I went to that school for 4 years, I didn't have an impact on anyone?
(Ross head appears above Joey's, Rachel's below Joey's and Phoebe's at the bottom)
Ross: Hey, is Rachel here?
Ross: She's still at dinner?
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's apartment. Ross enters.]
[Scene: Ross and his date walk into a lobby. They are both wearing their jackets]
Ross: Should we send something?
Ross: Hey, so uhm... How was dinner?
[The next one is from Episode 609: The One Where Ross Got High, Rachel is describing her desert to Joey and Ross.]