words in movies
Chandler: Oh, so thats why the priest threw holy water on me. (theres no reaction from Joey) Okay, listen, you have to cheer up! Okay? You should come out with Ross and me, I mean anything is better than sitting around here crying all day about Kate.
Ross: (entering) Hey!
Ross: (triumphantly) Im gonna be on TV!!
Ross: Yeah! Theyre putting together this panel to talk about these fossils they just found in Peru and The Discovery Channels gonna film it!
Ross: Thanks. You ready to go?
Ross: (entering, wearing a white suit with a little red bow tie) Hey, you guys! Guess what?
Ross: Y'know what I didnt wear this suit for a year because you hated it. Well, guess what? Youre not my girlfriend anymore so...
Ross: Right.
Ross: (to Monica) You like it right?
Monica: Oh absolutely. I like it even more on you than I did on Colonel Sanders. (Ross starts to leave) Ross! Ross! Im kidding!
Ross: Okay, good bye! (leaves)
Ross: (entering carrying a garment bag) Hey!
Ross: (sees the chick) Ohhh, hey! All right, listen, I-I have that TV thing in like two hours, and I need your help, okay? What do you think? (takes out two suits) This blue suit, or this brown one?
Ross: Really? (Joey gives him a Like I would know look)
Rachel: (she reaches for the bottle) Oww! (She grabs the bottle, but has trouble opening it. She pops the top off and aspirins fly all over the place as Ross enters.)
Ross: Wow! That aspirin dance really works!
Ross: Oh my God, is that still...
Ross: No youre not.
Ross: Rach!
Ross: (stopping her from falling) Okay, okay. Look, you have got to go to a doctor! Okay?
Ross: And Im sure youre gonna make a big impression. Hi! Im Rachel Green. Its nice to meet you. (He lifts his leg and imitates shaking hands with it, just like how Rachel was trying to pick up the aspirin with her feet.) Come on, you probably have a broken rib!
Ross: Rach...
Ross: Rachel...
Ross: Fine. Ill go.
Ross: (He checks his watch) Sure. Ill help you.
[Scene: Rachels bedroom, Rachel is trying to put on eye liner with her left hand, as Ross is setting out her shoes.]
Ross: Ohh. (He drops the shoes, takes the brush from her, and licks the tip. He doesnt like how it tastes.)
Ross: Okay. This stuff?
Ross: All right.
Ross: Oke-dokey. (He pokes her in the eye with the brush.)
Ross: Sorry.
Ross: Sorry, Im sorry. Close, close, close...
Ross: Im sweeping...
Ross: Sweep, sweep....(He starts to paint it on her eye, making it look like she has a black eye.)
Ross: What? What?
Ross: No. No, y'know you dont, you dont wear enough of this. (Rachel is shocked) What?
Ross: Well I, close your eyes, I just think youre gonna like this a little better, cause, close-close... (He gets some more on the brush)
Ross: (blows it) Sorry. Cause umm, I think this will make you a little more sophisticated.
Monica: Okay. Does it have to do with Ross and Rachel?
[Scene: Rachels Bedroom, Ross is finishing up her make-up.]
Ross: There you go! Good enough for your party, huh?
Ross: Yep?
Ross: Okay, come on! All right, I gotta go! So good luck at the party. Okay?
Rachel: Oh wait, Ross, would you just stay and help me get dressed?
Ross: (checks his watch) Sure, okay.
Ross: What?
Ross: Rachel, Ive seen you naked a million times. I ate hot fudge off you naked. Remember, I-I sucked that mini-marshmallow out of your belly button?
Ross: Rach, y'know I can see you naked any time I want.
Ross: All I have to do is close my eyes. See? (closes his eyes) Woo-hoo!!
Rachel: Ross! Stop that!
Ross: Ah, Im sorry.
Ross: Ahh, sorry, nothing you can do about it. Its one of my ah, rights as the ex-boyfriend. (closes his eyes again) Oop, oh yeah!
Ross: Okay, okay, Im sorry, it will never happen... (closes eyes) Uh-oh! Wait a minute! Wait-wait, now there are a hundred of you and Im the king.
Ross: Come on, would you grow up? Its no big deal.
Ross: Yowzah!!!
Ross: Aww, come on.
Ross: Oh my God!
Ross: All right.
Ross: Look...
Ross: Okay.
Ross: Rach?
Ross: Easy. Easy. You have to go to the hospital. Okay?
Ross: Okay.
Ross: Okay, Im gonna get your coat and then Ill-Ill put you in a cab.
Ross: (He thinks about it) Of course I am. I just have to make a call.
Ross: Okay? (goes into the living room)
Ross: (rushing back in) What?! I wh-, whats wrong?
Monica: Okay, so it doesnt involve Ross or Rachel or Chandler or Joey. But, what about Pete?
[Scene: The Hallway Between The Apartments, Ross and Rachel are coming back from the hospital. Ross is helping her up the stairs.]
Ross: Rach, you cant look fat in an x-ray.
Ross: (to Chandler) Thats a duck.
Chandler: Thats a bad duck!!! (to Ross) Howd the thing go tonight, Ross?
Ross: Oh, it was, nah, well....
Ross: Nothing, ah there was this thing at the museum. Come on. (they go into her apartment) Easy.
Ross: I was kinda, supposed to be on TV tonight for The Discovery Channel.
Ross: Yeah.
Rachel: Ross, why didnt you tell me that?
Ross: Eh, cause I knew that if I told you, youd make me go, and I knew you needed someone to be with you tonight. Come on. Come on.
Ross: What?
Ross: (breaking the silence) You should get some sleep.
Ross: So, Ill umm...
Ross: No, thats, no, as long as youre okay. So Ill ah, Ill see you tomorrow.
(In the hallway, Ross all dejected, sits down on the step.)
Chandler: (coming out of his apartment and seeing Ross) What did you do?
Ross: (goes over to Julio) Come here, here, come here, come here, (pause) Mrs. Buffay. Sorry, about what I said, umm, it was, it was insensitive of me to say that you were just a cat. When clearly you are also the reincarnated spirit, of my friends mother.
ROSS: I'm gonna get a new band-aid. Hey, how 'bout the time I cut the legs off your Malibu Ken?
ROSS: Wait hold on Tony, hold on. [answers second line] Hello. Hi, yeah no, she's right here. Um hold on. [gets first line] Hi Tony, can I call you back? That's uh, that's my sister's boyfriend.
Ross: (returning with the coffee) Okay here we are Paul, Elizabeth. (He sets down their cups.) So I hope you guys were finding something to talk about.
Ross: Itll be okay Joe.
Ross: Tag? Y-You're going? (Comes over to Tag) Uh we didn't, uh we didn't get the chance to talk. Uh, so, where did you say you're from again?
Ross: Yeah, oh and Sarah... I'd like to introduce you to my colleague, uh, Professor Wheeler, a-and this is Joey Tribbiani.
(Everybody stands up and applauds. Ross looks flattered and surprised. His friends and other members of the audience go to congratulate him)
Ross: (entering from the bathrooms) Hey Chandler, what are you doing tonight?
Ross: You're crazy.
Ross: Well, I asked him if he wanted to eat, he said, "No." I asked him if he wanted to sleep, he said, "No." I asked him what he wanted to do, he said, "No." So, hes sweeping. (We see Ben playing with a broom and a dustpan.)
(Ross leaves to do so and Rachel enters with a guy.)
Ross: I'm just sayin' if dogs do experience jet lag, then, because of the whole um, seven dog years to one human year thing, then, when a dog flies from New York to Los Angeles, he doesn't just lose three hours, he loses like a week and a half.
Ross: OK, ahem, hey, does anybody know a good place if you're not dating a puma?
Ross: Hmm? (Turns around and sees that its Elizabeth) Oh, a student I dont know.
Ross: No-no, he's, he's very docile.
Ross: Ok, fine, but I don't want them bonding to much. I don't want her telling Emma she needs a nose job.
PHOEBE: Well, you kind of just did.� That guy is going to call you tonight.� Ross is going to pick up the phone and that's a pretty clear message.
Phoebe: Dont be worried about that! Your tombstone can say whatever you want it to say! It could say, Ross Geller, Good at Marriage! Yknow? Mines gonna say Phoebe Buffay, Buried Alive.
Ross: Sweetie, this conversation is starting to make me a little uncomfortable.
ROSS: But wait, there's more. Hey, Chandler, what is in the envelope?
[Scene; Central Perk, Monica and Chandler are on the couch. Ross walks in.]
[Time lapse. Ross is now clearly drunk. He is holding up a shot glass to his eye like a jeweller's eye.]
Rachel: Oh Amy, don't cry Amy. Um.. Ross, could I talk to you in private?
Chandler: Where's Ross?
Ross: Hey you guys I got some bad news. (He sets the stack of papers down on the table.)
Ross: Nah, I dunno... I think you reach a certain age, having a roommate is kinda pathe- (Realises) ....sorry, that's, that's 'pathet', which is Sanskrit for 'really cool way to live'.
[Scene: The Semi-Private Labor Room, time lapse, Ross is massaging out a cramp on Rachels hip as Marc opens up the privacy screen.]
Monica: (Offering Ross the skull) Licorice?
PHOEBE: I don't believe this. Is this how this relationship's gonna work? Ross equals boss. I mean, c'mon what is this, 1922?
Ross: (only half-paying attention) Yes, of course they like you!
(At this point, Chandler walks into the living room from his bedroom. Ross and Joey both have their backs to him, so they don't notice. Chandler sees the situation and remains quiet, watching.)
Ross: Yeah, obvious beauty's the worst. You know, when it's right there in your face. Me, I like to have to work to find someone attractive. Makes me feel like I earned it.
Rachel: Ross, tonight was about the two of you getting along. (Ross groans and rubs his neck) Oh, would you just see my chiropractor, already.
Ross: OK, turn around. (Joey looks taken aback) I just don't want you staring at me when I'm doing this.
Ross: No, of course, Um Um, everybody? Um, I-I just wanted to say on behalf of my new bride, Rachel (She turns around and smiles), and myself. Umm, that if if in 35 years, were half as happy as you guys are, well count ourselves the luckiest people in the world.
Ross: (entering) Hey! Okay! I got my passport, fresh socks, and a snake bite kit!
Ross: Oh! Man I dont think Ive seen you since uh, Lance Davis graduation party.
Ross: There's no seatbelt!
Ross: Oh my God, he just said your name, thats great! Good job Ben.
Ross: Fine! Yknow what? It doesnt matter, because, if I remember correctly, there is a comb on the floor of the bathroom.
Ross: Oh, Carol and I have a new system. If she punches in 911, it means she's having a baby, otherwise I just ignore it.
[Cut to Monica and Chandler's, Monica is throwing a party. Joey is talking to Ross about the bad audition he just had while pouring booze onto a snow cone.]
Joey: Name? (Ross looks at him.) I know Ross but whats it short for? You know like, like Rossel or Rosstepher.
Charlie: I'm sorry... (introduces them to each other) Ross Geller... Benjamin Hobart.
Ross: Right, no, I understand.
Ross: I don't want to be single, okay? I just... I just- I just wanna be married again!
Ross: Hey. (stutters something incoherent)
Ross: Really? Its not just frowned upon?
Ross: Oh! (Recoils in horror.)
Ross: Okay, umm. Did you ever see, um, Return Of The Jedi?
Ross: You did! Oh.... I always figured you just thought I was Monica's geeky older brother.
Ross: The blond woman is my ex-wife, and the woman touching her is her... close, personal friend.
Ross: Okay, stop it! I cant deal with this right now. I have to go have a baby.
Ross: (To Chandler) I thought you were my best friend, this is my sister! My best friend and my sister! I-I cannot believe this!
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey and Ross are sitting at one of the high tables.]
Ross: Your ex-boyfriend is insane.
Ross: I know! It's like, if you knew, why didn't you tell me, you know? I mean, call, or leave a note: "Hi, I just dropped by to say your wife's gay"
Ross: JFK.
[Scene: a NYU lecture hall, Rachel and Monica are arriving to talk to Ross after the lecture, but are there early.]
Ross: And that's bad because..., you hate chicken piccata?
ROSS: Oh, Monica, I figured I'd come by tomorrow morning and pick up Fluffy's old cat toy, OK?
Ross: (even more shocked) Wha..? I need 6 graduate students.
Ross: Oh. Listen, do you think- and try not to let my intense vulnerability become any kind of a factor herebut do you think it would be okay if I asked you out? Sometime? Maybe?
Ross: (getting upset) Oh-oh really? Did you confuse it with your own turkey sandwich with a Moist Maker?
Ross: Fine, we'll call the next one Ella.
Rachel: I know you did. I'm just gonna deal with it, I'm just gonna deal with it. (Ross comes by, smoching with Julie on the phone.) I gotta get out of here. (Exits)
Ross: Uh, you know, you can't always get a seat on the subway, so... (laughs stupidly)
Ross: (stares at him angrily) Ok. (determined to spell it correctly) B - O - S ...
[Scene: The Auditorium, Ross and Rachel are about to... you know.]
Monica: Okay, Mike and Joey, get in position. Chandler, come with me. (they walk off, Ross looks down to Chappy, who he's holding and he gets a whiff of the dog's smell. He is clearly disgusted by it.)
Ross: Im gonna go get him! Okay, I am going back in! (Squeals like a madman.)
Ross: Calm down. Theres no reason to get testy.
Ross: What? I cant cancel on Joan!
Ross: (to the class) Right! So when Rigby got his samples back from the laboratory he made a startling discovery! What he believed to be igneous, was in fact sedimentary. Imagine his consternation when(sees Monica and Rachel.) Oh bloody hell.
Ross: Really? You dont think thats a little inappropriate. (Shes wearing a tank top and has her belly sticking out.)
Ross: Yeah the dad and Ben eat soup and pretend to enjoy it.
Ross: And that's just the herbivores. I'm not even gonna discuss the carnivores, their heads are already too big. Which is ironic considering their stunted cerebral development.
Ross: Well, whatever it is I'm-I'm very, very sorry. Okay?
[Time lapse, after dinner. Ross stands up from his self-made map.]
Phoebe: (to Chandler and Monica) You guys, what, what do we do about Ross who drove all the way up here? What do we do? Just like send him back and were then gonna go skiing?
Ross: And that should conclusively prove that I had the idea for Jurassic Park first! Now lets take a look at (Phoebe rushes in.)
Ross: Well, Im a spud
Tommy: Oh! Oh! The usher must be right! What, with all that training they go through! Get out!! (They start to leave.) Here! (He throws him back his ticket.) (to Ross, calmly) Hey man, you want the aisle?
Ross: In the hospital.
Ross: Space is filled with orbiting children. (pause) Look, please, just come on, you know, when you’ll see the look on Emma’s face, I swear you won’t regret it.
Ross: (childish) Huh-huh, they already know it.
(Ross with his pants around his ankles tries to run, but Dr. Geller forgets that he has his pants around his ankles and falls down trying to flee.)
Ross: Oh! That is so thoughtful. (To Joey.) She's a keeper. And what did you bring me? (Grabs the bag that Charlie brought for Joey.)
[cut to later, Joey, Rachel, Ross, and Tim are watching the football game, and they all cheer loudly.]
Ross: Oh my God, she's great! I mean, we-we have so much in common and she's just cool, and funny...
Ross: Cause otherwise theyd have to call it the room room.
Rachel: (in a tearful voice) Oh... Oh boy... (she turns around and sees Ross) Hi...
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Joey and Ross are playing catch with a little foam globe.]
Ross: Well, yeah, kinda. Um, but thats okay, see we have an understanding, um, see we each have this list of five famous people, (gets his out) so Im allowed to sleep with you. No, no, no, its flattery.
(And walks up right behind Ross, and standard sitcom joke 2B follows with the person being insulted standing right behind the person doing the insulting while the rest of the people become frightened and try to warn the insulter about the insultees presence.)
Ross: I'm meeting with professor Sherman about my being the keynote speaker...
Ross: It just amazes me that your still pulling stuff like this.
(At this point a stream of obscenities burst forth from Phoebes mouth just in time for Ben and Ross to enter and hear most of it, and in slow motion Ross tries to shield his innocent son from Phoebes vulgarity.)
Ross: (to Chandler) Well, if Phoebe's choosing, then say hello to Mike's next groomsman.