words in movies
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Joey and Ross are playing catch with a little foam globe.]
Joey: Hey Ross, is uh, is Staten Island really an island?
Ross: Uh-huh, that's why they call it Staten Island.
Ross: (he catches the ball and pauses, staring at Joey in disbelief) Also an island.
Ross: (looks at his watch) 2:17.
Ross: Are you serious?!
Ross: Wow! We are pretty good at this! Hey! We totally forgot about lunch!
Joey and Ross: No.
Ross: You bought Shawn Cassidy!
Joey and Ross: Yeah!
Rachel: Okay! (She goes and gets her surprise and when she returns with it, Ross stares in shock.) Check it out!
(Joey turns and looks at quite possibly one of the ugliest pets that you can possibly buy on the planet. Rachel has bought herself a hairless cat. Yep, a hairless cat! Joey and Ross start to get sick.)
Ross: What-what is it?!
Ross: Why is it inside out?!
Ross: How much did you pay for that?
Ross: Yeah? How much?
Ross: ON A CAT??!!!!
Ross: Free cats do that too, y'know. {Which reminds me, if I might get a little political here, support your local animal shelter. Pet shops are not the place to buy dogs and cats from, you get a much better deal from the shelter, plus they probably won't die on you in a week and a half. If you want a leash, go to the pet shop. If you want the dog for that leash, go to the shelter and save it's life. Now back to regularly scheduled programming.}
Ross: (To Joey) Hey, you wanna get something to eat or uh, do you wanna see how long we can throw this ball back and forth? Huh?
Ross: Yeah?
Joey: Hey Ross, wouldn't it be great if we could go two straight hours without dropping it?!
Ross: Uhh, yeah it would! Let's do it!
Ross: What?
[Cut to Chandler and Joey's, Ross is seen throwing the ball into the bathroom, presumably where Joey is currently using the facilities.]
Ross: I know! (Looks at the ball in his hands.) Don't switch hands, okay?
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Ross and Joey are still playing catch.]
Ross: now when they found the remains of the Mesozoic Mastodon they discovered what appeared to be the remains of a Paleozoic Amphibian in its jaws! How did it get there?!
Ross: How do you know? You don't have a watch.
(He throws it back to Ross, but it's intercepted by Monica and the guys both scream in horror.)
Ross: Monica, whatever you do, do not drop that ball!
Joey: Yeah, we haven't dropped it in (Looks to Ross.)
Ross: 2 hours, 27 minutes.
Ross: Hey Rach!
Ross: Check it out! Almost 3 hours without droppin' it!
Ross: Yeah.
Ross: Doesn't sound as crazy as paying a thousand dollars for a cat.
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Joey, Ross, and Monica are still playing catch, with Chandler looking on. Joey throws the ball to Monica who catches it and whips it at Ross.]
Ross: (catching the ball) Monica! Stop throwing it so hard! We're on the same team!
Ross: It's really a uh-uh three person game, y'know?
Ross: All right. (He gently tosses the ball to Chandler who catches it.)
Ross: Baking it didn't help, huh?
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Joey, Ross, Monica, and now Chandler are still playing catch. The guys are exhausted and sitting around the room. Monica is still standing all pumped up and being hyper-competitive yet again. {Okay! We get it! She's competitive!! Must we see all the time?!}]
Ross: I'm starving!
Joey: I don't know who made you the boss? All right? We (Ross and him) invented this game!
Ross: I'm still hungry!
Ross: I am!
Ross: Oh, thank God!
Gunther: (To Ross) Hey! So what is this? Some kind of snake or something?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Hyper-competitive Monica, Rachel, Chandler, Joey, and Ross are still playing catch. Monica is finally tiring while the rest of them are totally exhausted and virtually asleep.]
Ross: I know. My arm is killing me.
Ross: Oh hey, Gary, want me to grab the berry for ya?
Monica: Now, Mom, everything's going fine, really. (Listens) Yeah, Ross is great. He's uh, he's in a whole other place. (Listens) No, he's gone. (Listens) No no, you don't have to fly back, really. (Listens) What do you mean this might be your only chance? (Listens) Would you stop? I'm only 26, I'm not even thinking about babies yet.
Ross: Come on Rach, you dont have what, ten minutes?
Chandler: (With the covers pulled up to his chin.) Morning, Ross.
(Ross turns to look at Joey.)
[Scene: Jen's apartment, Ross is picking her up for their date.]
Joey: Look Ross, I am so-so sorry. I-I-I
Ross: Oh God, here we go!
Ross: What's going on?
Ross: Wow! You look nice. What's the occasion?
Joey: Hey Ross listen Chandler got you out of going to the lesbian sandwich museum this weekend!
Ross: No! No! I didnt do that. Its just Okay, honestly no. I dont, I dont see a big future with her.
(Ross hands Rachel back the newspaper, and she starts beating him with it again.)
Ross: What does this mean? What do you, I mean do you wanna, get back together?
Mona: Ross, what are you doing?!
Ross: (Pause) Yeah I am! Yeah, Ben got a second audition!
[Scene: Lamaze class, Ross is again on the floor, cradled in Susans lap, but now Carol is cradled in his lap, and she has a pretend baby, on her lap. The teacher is showing her class a video, which is about to end.]
Ross: You know, sometimes when I'm alone in my apartment, I look over here and you guys... are just having dinner or... watching TV or something, but... it makes me feel better. And now when I look over, who am I gonna see? The Gottliebs, the Yangs? They don't make me feel so good. (Joey pats Ross on his back)
Ross: I don't know, umm
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's. Ross, Rachel, and Phoebe are there. Chandler enters.]
Ross: (entering) Hey!
Ross: Okay.
Ross: Action.
Ross: Yeah. Right. Save it. I can do that. (Gets up and does a little kara-tay.)
(Joey and Ross enter. Phoebe and Mike are sitting on the couch, reading a magazine.)
Ross: Oh, so-so you talked to her. Did she, did she sound mad?
Ross: (entering) Hey!
Ross: All right!
Ross: Well, I don't know.
[Scene: Ross, Phoebe, Rachel, and Chandler at Monica and Rachel's apartment.]
(Ross is eavesdropping in the hallway.)
(Ross isn't sure what to do with that comment.)
Ross: Okay. So we're, we're good?
Janice: (starting to cry) You're a very sweet person Ross, umm, unfortunately I don't think I can take another second of you whining!!
Ross: Great! Because people kept showing up, I think its like uh-a thing!
Ross: What can I do? One person wants to break-up, you break-up.
Ross: Yeah, okay, hold on! (He puts the phone down and proceeds to spread a large amount of powder on his legs and makes another attempt at pulling up his pants. It doesn't work, and without picking up the phone leans down to it.) (Almost in tears.) They're not coming on man.
Ross: Okay, are you mad at me because my hair gel smells?
Ross: No, actually I thought about it when, when we were going out. Its how I imagined I uh, I would ask you to marry me.
Ross: Hey!
Ross: You couldn't let me have her, could ya?!
Ross: (His voice is altered to sound like a computer.) Electrifying. (He plays the sound of a ticking clock.) Emphatic time-time-time
[Scene: Central Perk. Chandler is sitting on the couch between Russ and Ross, doing a crossword puzzle.]
Ross: Fine! Its your life! (Starts to storm out mad about his failed attempt at the manipulation of his best friend and sister, but stops and tries one last time.) I just dont want to see you guys break up! Which you will do if you move in together, (Monica and Chandler just stare at him.) but thats what you want, theres nothing I can do. (Opens the door and tries one more time.) DONT DO IT!!!!! (Finally leaves.)
Ross: Sorry I ah, I scared you in there.
Ross: Why are you mad at me?
Ross: When did I say you were boring?!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel and Ross are entering]
(Joey hugs Rosss neck and has a look of complete contentment on his face which, after a short while, causes David and Matt to start laughing.)
Monica: How do you think I am?! Youve wrecked all my childhood memories. You love Ross more than me. And I just rubbed a dead mouse on my face!
Ross: Come on. (They leave and Chandler sticks his head out.)
Ross: Dude, you are sick.
Chandler: Air hole! Air hole!! (Ross retracts his hand quickly.)
Ross: Look, I just think you're an adult, okay? And you should get over your silly fears.
Ross: Hey! You were a closed book! Okay? Im not a mind reader! Besides, I hate those conversations. Im horrible at them. Really! Maybe-maybe I need kind of a gesture. Yknow, something that says were moving forward without having to talk about it.
Ross: Hey!
Rachel: (entering with Ross) Hi!
Ross: What'd you say?
Ross: (interrupting Monica and Emily) So we should probably get going soon.
Ross: It's laundry. The thinking through is minimal.
Rachel: Yeah it is, it is. (to Ross) We really, really have to do something about that.
Chandler: You dove in front of Ross! Ross!
Ross: No! No! I want to talk now! Okay? IIn fact, (picks up the phone) I am going to talk to the president of the condom company!
Ross: Thats okay. Shes still in there enjoying her fake party and uh, its too late to do any of the things I had planned, so
Ross: So youre strong enough to face her on your own?
Joey: No dude, Ross tore up the tickets!
Ross: If you have to call me name, I prefer "Ross the Divorcer". It's just cooler. Look, I know my marriage isn't exactly work out. But I love to be that committed to another person. And Carol had some good times before she became a lesbian... and once afterward. I'm sorry.
Ross: I think the check in is that way. (Points)
Ross: Yeah, oh hey, you are right on time.
Ross: Hey.
Ross: Do you want me too?
Rachel: And um, what-what is that Ross?
Ross: Thank you.
Ross: (pfew). Good choice Ross.
(Ross storms off embarrassed.)
Ross: Can we, can we just forget this ever happened?
Ross: (sarcastic) Yep! That's hilarious!
Ross: Is that so?
Ross: Okay, I didn't know you would say that.
Ross: Oh! I thought you guys got married in uh, January?
Ross: (loudly so that everyone can hear) Hey lady! I don't care how much you want it! Okay?! I am not gonna to have sex with you in the bathroom! (Rachel sinks lower on her chair trying to hide.)
Phoebe: Oh, sure! (She gets up to leave.) Bye Ross! (Whispering behind his back.) Forever.
ROSS: Well uh, you see that, that little cluster of stars next to the big one? That is Ursa Major.
ROSS: Yeah but, you know, now that I think about it, I don't think I've ever seen Fun Bobby without a... a drink in his hand.
Ross: (Entering) What is this dive? Only you could've picked this place.
Ross: No! No! LookHey, enough is enough! Look, I am sorry that you feel guilty or whatever about spending time with your new mom, but this is not your old mom. This is a cat! Okay, Julio the cat! Not mom! Cat!
Ross: If you want to check your email, just ask! (Chandler tries to look offended)
Ross: Look, honey, I have tried to make nice, it doesnt work.
Ross: What the? What
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Rachel is filing her nails as Ross and Ben enter.]
Ross: Hey! That was a practical purchase! I needed that car for transportation! Okay? I-I have a child!
Chloe: I want you to met some friends of mine. (Introduces him to Chandler and Joey) This guy is my hero, he comes in with some stuff he wants it blown up 400%, we said we dont do that, and he says you gotta. And y'know what, we did it. And now anytime anybody wants 400, we just say lets Ross it!
Fat Monica: Ross! (Wanting to be introduced.)
Ross: Oh-oh, hitting me where it hurts, my ski skills.
Ross: Hey Chandler! Saw the new furniture. Very nice.
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Chandler, Joey, and Ross are watching a basketball game on the couch.]
Ross: Ohh, it was the best!
Phoebe: (sees Ross and Rachel) Hey!
Ross: Phoebe! (They hug.)
[Scene: The casino, Ross and Rachel are entering.]