words in movies
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross and a beautiful blonde (Cheryl) are standing outside. The rest of the gang is watching from inside.]
Ross: You're welcome for a delicious dinner.
Chandler: Ross and the most beautiful girl in the world.
[Cheryl walks away and Ross walks inside. Everyone stares at him in disbelief.]
Ross: I know!
Ross: Actually she's a paleontology doctoral candidate, specializing in the centazoic era.
Ross: I've seen her at work, but I always figured, ah-huh? But, uh, I made her dinner. We had a great time. And we're going out again tomorrow.
Ross: Fine by me; hope she wins.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's. Ross, Rachel, and Phoebe are there. Chandler enters.]
Ross: How do you think it's gonna look when you get her something incredibly meaningful and expensive and her boyfriend Joey gives her an orange?
Ross: So, uh, why did you have to turn it down?
[Scene: Outside Cheryl's apartment, Ross and Cheryl are kissing]
Ross: (moved by the kiss) Huh...
Ross: Did homo-erectus hunt with wooden tools?
[They go into the apartment. Inside the apartment it looks like a sewage dump exploded and landed in her living room. There are clothes and food and junk covering every square inch of space. I mean pigs have nicer pens. Ross is completely shocked.]
Ross: Mitzi is.....
Ross: (mouths "where?") Uh... Oh hey, do you, uh (steps on some garbage and falters) ...do you have any, um, Cinnamon Fruit Toasties?
Ross: Well, I do! Why don't we go back to my place, light a couple of candles, break open a box of Cinnamon Fruit Toasties, uh...
Ross: Oh, yeah, why not?
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Ross and Joey are standing and talking, Ross is tying a tie.]
Ross: You know how you throw your jacket on a chair at the end of the day?
Ross: Well, like that, only instead of a chair, it's a pile of garbage. And instead of a jacket, it's a pile of garbage. And instead of the end of the day, it's the end of time, and garbage is all that has survived! (Ross takes the loosely tied tie off and hands it to Joey who puts it on.) Here.
Ross: What do you mean? Nothing happened! I had to get out of there.
Ross: No, I tried that. She says it has a weird smell.
Ross: I don't know. Soap?
Joey: All right, listen, Ross... you like this girl, right?
Ross: Yeah.
Ross: Yeah.
Ross: Yeah, okay you're right.
Ross: I mean, uh, who... who cares about a little sloppiness?
Ross: It's, uh... it's endearing, really.
Joey: All right! Now you go get that beautiful pig! (Ross hesitates, looks unsure) Oink!
Ross: (mustering up courage) Yes. Yes I do. (They go inside.)
Cheryl: I'll be right back. Make yourself comfortable. (Ross attempts to clear a place for his coat and fold it small enough to fit. Then hit sits on the couch. Something falls on him from above and he brushes his neck off frantically.)
Cheryl: (sneaking up behind Ross) Guess who?
Ross: Department of Sanitation?
Ross: Oh! (She kisses him) Ah. (They kiss more, and move down onto the couch. Ross's hand moves under some garbage) Aw! (His hand is covered with something brown and gooey.)
Ross: (trying to make his disgust into lust) Ah, Cheryl!
Cheryl: Oh, Ross!
[They sit up, moaning in excitement, and Cheryl straddles Ross. Ross finds a slice of bologna and moans higher and louder, then a bag of potato chips on the coffee table starts to move. Ross throws Cheryl off his lap, grabs a tennis racket and a toilet brush and starts pounding the bag.]
Ross: Oh my god! I'm so sorry, Cheryl. I must have freaked out.
Rachel: (To Ross) Great, shoot, what are we gonna do?
Phoebe: (to Ross) This place is awesome!
Ross: You know, we should just go, I’m not gonna find anything here! This stuff is ridiculous!
Ross: Wow!
Mona: Yeah, you still have feelings for me. And-and to be honest, I-I still have feelings for you. And I wish that we can work it out Ross, but we cant. Its too complicated with you and Rachel and the baby, I-I just It just wasnt meant to be.
Ross: Really?
Joey: Come on Ross be realistic, y'know? If I did write something, what are the chances I could get those guys to star in it?
Ross: Wait a minute, there's two sets of nozzles, which one is it?
Ross: Uh thats an eighteenth century Indian artifact from Calcutta.
Ross: Uh, actually these might look pretty good on me.
Ross: Come on, Im your older brother, ask me!
Ross: Well, Ill-Ill be there. I mean I have to wear a costume to all my classes that day anyway so
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross is performing, his music hasnt improved.]
Charlie: Gosh, Ross, you know, you seem a little...
Ross: You know what the best part about this is? I can never be fired.
[Scene: Ross's apartment, he's having his party, only he's the only guest. He gets up and puts on a nametag that says Ross, but doesn't quite like it. So he takes it off and puts on one that says Dr. Geller and he puts the Ross one underneath the Dr. Geller one. Then as he turns off the music, we hear the party for Howard raging in the apartment across the hall.]
Ross: You know, I gotta go find him. He's gotta be here someplace.
Ross: (interrupting her) Lift!! And slide!
Ross: Yes. I lived with you guys for a while and then I found this place. (Joey just stares at him) I'm Ross.
Ross: Hey, what do you say we celebrate? Champagne? (he goes to get the champagne)
Ross: Yeah. He wouldn't give me the grant, because I wouldn't give you up.
Ross: I can't believe this is happening.
[Cut to Joey and Rachel's, Ross is living with Chandler and Joey. Joey and Ross have built a fort out of boxes, Chandler enters and they stand up slowly.]
Ross: (trying to act manly in front of Janine) No I dont want to play video games, Joey!
(Ross resumes playing, this time accompanied by Phoebe screeching out Es in tune with Ross. While Phoebe is singing along, Rachel is having a very difficult time keeping a straight face. Thankfully, Ross gives up after a little while.)
Ross and Rachel: Ohh! Ew!
[Scene: Central Perk. Joey's on the couch when Ross walks to him, with his jacket closed.]
Ross: No, you guys, I mean my keyboards are all the way up inNo, yeah, okay. (Runs out.)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Chandler, Ross. Joey, and Rachel are eating breakfast. Chandler is holding a bottle of Herseys Syrup.]
Joey: (shouting to Ross) JOEY DOESN'T SHARE FOOD!
Ross: Well, looks like it's just the two of us tonight, huh old buddy?
(Ross puts the piece back on the plate)
Ross: Food.
Ross: Forty-five minutes.
Ross: I know, and with the baby coming?
Ross: What's going on?
Rachel: I mean if you think about it, I mean Ross did learn something from each marriage.
Ross: Oh my God.
Ross: You know what, if you wanna look for a house, that's okay.
Ross: What?
Ross: I don't know you'd be so bored with marriage. I mean it's so... normal.
Ross: Uh we-we need to talk.
Ross: You put an offer on a house?
Ross: You can see where he'd have trouble.
Ross: Okay, listen I am not a pervert!
Ross: That money is mine, Green!
Ross: No, 19.
Ross: Two seconds...
Ross: Don’t blame the questions!
Ross: What the hell are doing?!!
Ross: Still sharp as a tack!
[Scene: The Hospital, Marcel lies on the operating table while recovering from the anaesthetic, tucked up under a sheet like an infant in a huge bed. Ross sits beside him, as a smiling Chandler, Monica and Rachel look on.]
Ross: Oh really? Did she tell you he plays the recorder, recites poetry and bakes Madeleines?
(Chandler is getting ready to kick off, Ross is holding the ball between his foot and finger.)
Ross: No-no, thats-thats not my thing! I do not love getting divorced!
Ross: What? Wh- hello? The Millners' farm in Connecticut? The Millners, they had this unbelievable farm, they had horses, and, and rabbits that he could chase and it was- it w- .....Oh my God, Chi Chi!
Ross: Really? Which one?
Ross: Except for "Match game"...
Ross: Yes please.
Ross: Dude. You're married to my sister.
Ross: Boss!
Ross: She's gone.
Ross: (opening the door to see Mona standing there) Mona? What arehi! What are you doing here? Im, um, supposed to pick you up!
Chandler and Ross: Way!
Ross: Hey, Missy...
Ross: You got it.
Ross: Those are the pacts!
Ross: Oh, oh... maybe not you!
Ross: Dude, I was gonna ask her out.
Ross: I know, and I can't stop sweating. (he walks towards Missy)
Ross: No, I-I got really hot in my leather pants so I took them off but they must have shrunk from the-the sweat or-or-or my legs expanded from the heat. Look, I-I can't put them back on. I can't!
Ross: Oh, it's all over everything. Why? Why me? (looks up)
Ross: What, I mean, a little, but no, what, go on.
Ross: Great!
Ross: So, Saturday night!
Ross: Oh, well, uh, this is gonna sound kinda silly, but, do you remember my roommate Chandler Bing?
Ross: Hey, there's Missy Goldberg. You gotta remember her.
Ross: Yeah, why?
Ross: You did?
Ross: C'mon you guys, this is really important to us.
Ross: (shows Tag his sweater tag) Umm, I dont some Italian guy. Come on, read your own label. See you later.
Ross: Too little, too late, Benji!
RACHEL: Well, we're not here to meet guys.� You have a boyfriend, I have a b. . . baby and a Ross.
Rachel: I am so sick of guys. I don't want to look at another guy, I don't want to think about another guy, I don't even want to be near another guy. (Ross crosses arms)
Ross: I guess if everybody else is...
(Suddenly the doors burst open, and ROSS AND RACHEL COME OUT ARM-IN-ARM!!!!! And Rachel's carrying a bouquet!!! THEY GOT MARRIED!!!!)
Chandler: Ross, that was 16 years ago!
Ross: No.
Ross: NO!
Ross: You broke the pact!
Ross: I didn't.
Ross: I don't know what... you're talking about.
Ross: I-I know. Well if something comes up... (walks away)
Ross: Cool! (They start kissing again and Chandler looks shocked)
Ross: (looks disappointed in himself) Man... I... I'm sorry.
Ross: I didn't know you knew about that.
[Scene: We cut back to the present. The reunion where Chandler and Ross are talking.]
Ross: We are even, right?
[Cut to the Jetway, the flight attendant enters, walks past Ross, and approaches an older man with his wife who is also wearing a blue jacket.]
Ross: (entering) Okay, okay, okay, I've got two cabs and no people. Go! Go! Go!