words in movies
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Phoebe enters to see Monica, Richard, Ross, and Rachel tearfully watching TV.]
ROSS: What're you talkin' about?
ROSS: Yeah but Phoebs, what about the end?
CHANDLER: Yeah, Ross can't go so it's between my friend Eric Prower who has breath issues and Dan with the poking. [starts poking Monica in the shoulder] 'Did you see that play? Do you want some more beer? Is that Spike Lee?'
[Scene: Ross's apartment. Ross is holding Ben.]
ROSS: [smells Ben's butt] No no, you're fine, you're fine.
ROSS: Hi.
ROSS: Oh you guys are not gonna believe what happened.
ROSS: Ok, we were sitting over there playing on the floor and he grabs the table and he pulls himself up. He pulled himself up. Standing man. I'm sorry you guys missed it but I did tape it so it you guys want to see it.
ROSS: I don't believe this. I miss, I miss the first time of everything. I missed, what, the first time he rolled over, the first time he crawled. What else did I miss? Has he spoken yet, is he driving, does he have a favorite liquour?
ROSS: Ooh, I, I'm so sick of missing stuff. Ya know, I want him for more than, than a day, I want him for a whole weekend. No listen , I mean, I feel like-
ROSS: Really? I mean, I, I had a whole speach prepared.
ROSS: Oh look, did, did you just see that? Did you see? He just waved, he just waved, he's never waved before, you've never waved before. Yes he has. Very good.
ROSS: Well, ya know, they're a little behind the times in Colonial Williamsburg.
ROSS: Buy mommy.
ROSS: Have a good time. Ok, Ben.
MONICA: Ross.
ROSS: Yeah.
ROSS: Well for starters, you may want to light it and lose the spatula.
ROSS: Look it's the artist formerly known as Chandler.
ROSS: Yeah, you really sidestepped that land mine.
ROSS: Thank you.
[Scene: Central Perk. Rachel is working. Ross enters with Ben.]
ROSS: Hi, we're visitiing. It's Ben and his da-da. Da-da. Can you say da-da? Look, I'm gonna tell your momies you said it anyway so you might as well try.
ROSS: Naa. A while ago I got a sah out of him, which I thought, ya know, might turn into sah-condary caregiver but... Hey, would you uh, would you hold him for a sec, 'cause I, I gotta take this off.
ROSS: What're you doing?
ROSS: Yeah, well, he's a baby not a bomb.
ROSS: Well just hold him like you'd hold a football.
ROSS: Ok, here, here. There we go.
ROSS: It's alright, it's no big deal.
ROSS: Yeah, definitely, I'm sure you'll feel totally different when it's our baby.
ROSS: What?
ROSS: Uhh, yeah. I mean, actually I kinda think that we'll have, we'll have two babies.
ROSS: Yeah. Ya know, a boy and a girl. Hopefully the girl will come first so Ben here won't feel too competitive.
ROSS: Well, we won't wanna raise kids in the city so we'll probably move to uh, Scarsdale.
ROSS: Yeah, that way I figure, ya know, we'll be far enough away from our parents that we don't have to see them all the time but close enough that they can come over and babysit whenever we want. And yes, I know, the taxes are a little higher than, let's say, Nassau county but the school system's supposedly great.
ROSS: Huh?
RACHEL: Yeah well, Ross just made plans for the whole century.
ROSS: [enters] Ok, what the hell happened back there?
ROSS: Well I'm sorry, I think about stuff. Ya know, I mean, you're at work, you're assembling bones, your mind wanders.
RACHEL: Ross, you have planned out the next 20 years of our lives, we've been dating for six weeks.
ROSS: C'mon, what, you never think about our future?
ROSS: No, no, I mean, ya know, I, I read a book and there was a girl named Emily and I thought, I thought that might be good.
ROSS: The big book of childrens' names.
RACHEL: Ok, Ross, Ross, ok listen, what we have is amazing.
ROSS: Yeah.
ROSS: Ok fine.
ROSS: We're not done.
ROSS: Ok, then you're gonna have to understand that you're with a guy who's not gonna stop planning his future with you because he knows that we're gonna end up together and if that scares you, tough, 'cause you're gonna have to deal with that.
ROSS: Good, 'cause I love you.
ROSS: Yeah.
ROSS: Well that's the first time we've said that.
ROSS: Well, I'm gonna kiss you.
ROSS: Ok, and then you take the poopie diaper and you put it in the poopie diaper pail.
RACHEL: Ok Ross, just so you know, calling it a poopie diaper doesn't make this process any cuter.
ROSS: [doorbell buzzes] Hello.
ROSS: Come on up. I'm gonna get the rest of his stuff together. [walks in his room]
RACHEL: I'm sorry, what did you just say? Did you just say hi? Oh my God, Ross, Ross, Ben just said 'Hi'.
ROSS: Wha, what?
ROSS: What, the word hi?
ROSS: Great, great, and I miss that too, I miss everything.
ROSS: Something about hi.
ROSS: Well, this was fun. Uh, we should really do it again sometime, wha'dya say? Ok. Alright so I've got him.
ROSS: Tuesday right. Ok, bye you guys.
ROSS: Bye Ben.
ROSS: Alright, alright, ok. Bye.
ROSS: Bye.
ROSS: Bye.
ROSS: Bye.
Ross: Yes, very nice Rachel.
Ross: Go!
Ross: Yeah, it really was!
Ross and Joey: Oh! Thats nice.
Joey: Wow. (To Ross) Good speech.
Ross: What is Monicas biggest pet peeve?
Ross: Im sorry Rach, it was, it was really close.
Chandler: So this is nice! I wish I didnt have to go, believe me! But unfortunately I have to. (He gets up and Joey moves over next to Ross.) Oh uh, by the way, whats the name the girl youre dating?
Ross: Actually, it wasnt that close.
Ross: Yeah?
Ross: No. No. Nothing happened. I shut the drapes to uh, show her slides of my favorite fossils.
(Monica gasps and holds her forehead. Phoebe, Rachel and Ross pull back their heads)
Ross: Oh. (He takes the picture and hugs her.
Ross: Its also a sign of friendship.
Ross: That is one good looking man!
[Scene: Carol and Susan's, Carol is reading, Ross is talking to her stomach.]
Ross: Oh no-no, after you. (She grabs a chair and heads upstairs.) (When shes gone.) Oh my God! (He drops the box and Chandler cant pick it up.)
Ross: Y'know what, y'know what, Im-Im not the one that wanted that, that break, okay. Youre the one that bailed on us. Youre the one that, that ran when things got just a little rough!
Ross: (in a 5 year olds tone) (To Monica) You are such a tattletale! Mom, Dad, you remember that-that time you walked in my room and smelled marijuana?
(They enter the lecture hall to find Ross speaking in an English accent for some unknown reason.)
Ross: It really was.
Ross: Well obviously only one of us can keep dating her.
Ross: A lot of other gas smells
Ross: Okay, okay take a guess.
Ross: Rachel! I'll just call her back.
Ross: All right! I want my key back!
Ross: Look, just because some idiot drew on your face doesn't mean you shouldn't have any fun! Okay? And besides, hey-hey-hey no one is even gonna look at you. Okay? This is Vegas! Hello! There are tons of other freaks here! (Rachel turns around and glares at him.) There are tons of freaks here. No other. No. Come on! No one will notice, I swear!
Ross: What?! What is with everybody? Its Thanksgiving, not...Truth-Day!
Ross: Marc- oh, this is ridiculous! We've been all over the neighbourhood. He's gone, he's-he's just gone.
Ross: Who wants to make some long distance calls?
Ross: Thats interesting, but check this out. I date her
Chandler: (To Ross) Why to save your dignity my man.
Ross: I don't remember him, but then again I touched so many lives. (they press their ears against the door)
[Scene: Central Perk, Rachel and Joey are there as Ross enters.]
Ross: Okay, okay. This can go on for a while.
Ross: Hey, maybe I can fix that, you know. Try to turn it into something else. (he opens the box)
Ross: Hey, divorced men are not bad men!
Monica: Forty-two to twenty-one! Like the turkey, Ross is done!
Ross: Is-isnt it the best?
Ross: Yes? Yes?! How can I help you?
Ross: And somebody took a shot at me!
[Joey and Ross go to the door, ready to leave.]
Ross: MY SANDWICH!!!!!! (Ross's scream scares a flight of pigeons away.)
Ross: Hey! So uh, was he excited about the tickets?
Monica: Oh absolutely. I like it even more on you than I did on Colonel Sanders. (Ross starts to leave) Ross! Ross! Im kidding!
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's. Ross lays a lot off small papers, shaped like the U.S. states onto the floor making a map with the states. Phoebe enters]
Ross: I am very very sorry.
Ross: -she, of course, she- uh- familiar with our.. special situation?
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross is telling Rachel about his class location predicament.]
Ross: Oh, Liam. So uh, what, were you guys playing soccer or somethingor should I call it (In an English accent) football?
Steve: Oh hey, Ross. Umm, see, I was thinking maybe you two could switch apartments because Phoebe's more our kind of people. Something to think about. (Walks away.)
Chandler: You wanna tell secrets?! Okay! Okay! In college, Ross used to wear leg warmers!
Ross: (entering) Hey everybody! Happy Thanksgiving!
Ross: oh, too late, too late! It's sent... oops sorry and so is the picture of you and the police man...
Ross: Well sorry, thats what I do on dates.
Ross: What? You forgot fourteen states?
Ross: It tastes like feet!
[Scene: A wintry February day in New York City, snowplows are clearing the streets. Inside Central Perk, all three girls are paying court to Ross.]
Ross: Youre great. And I-I know someday this will happen for you too. You just hang in there.
Ross: What? That's impossible.
Ross: Done! With time a-to-spare.
Ross: You have to respect the sea! (Storms off.)
ROSS: Well, ya know, someone should have called me.
Ross: You're on!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Ross and Monica are fighting over the remote.]
[Scene: A judges chambers, Rachel and Ross are filing their annulment papers.]
Ross: Man! (Monica mouths, "Im sorry.")
Ross: Phoebe, why is your bag moving?
Ross: (Angry) I- I- I ca- I can't believe this. I mean, all I asked you to do was keep him in the apartment.
Ross: Come on! (They go to the jetway, Ross hands the tickets to the gate agent.) Here.
Ross: Okay umm, why dont we all take a seat, yknow? And uh, and Ill get us all some uh some coffees(He goes to pull out Elizabeths chair, but Paul steps in)Yeah, why dont you. (Paul pulls out her chair) Uh and you guys can talk about whatever, whatever you want. Yknow? Whatever pops into your head. (He turns his back to Paul and Elizabeth and points to himself for Chandler, Monica, and Phoebe. Then he goes to order the coffee.)
Ross: Well, you know, I'd feel a whole lot better if you got dressed now.
Ross: (To Katie) Yeah, Im just gonna grab my coat. And uh, and my whip. (Katie looks worried.) Yknow because of the Indiana Jones? (Katie laughs) Not-not because Im-Im into S&M. (Katies worried again.) Im not-Im not into anything weird. Yknow? Just-just normal sex. (Katie is uncomfortable.) So, Im gonna grab my coat. (Does so, leaving Katie and Rachel alone.)
(Theres a knock on the door and Ross enters.)
Ross: It's too cold.
Ross: Are you out of your mind?
Phoebe: Ooh, so this is great! Rachel's gonna have a terrible date, Ross gets stood up, and then they'll realise how good they have it together.
Ross: Damn, I forgot you were here.
Ross: YAY! (He continues the happiness with her by dancing around) quick thing, I went to talk to Mike.
Ross: A bit of a daredevil are we?
Ross: So lets decide on the spending limit
Ross: What? That's like insanely easy!
Ross: The ride broke down. So, Carol and I went behind a couple of those mechanical Dutch children... then they fixed the ride, and we were asked never to return to the Magic Kingdom.
Ross: No, Rachel doesnt want me to....
Monica: Ross! That is so sweet of you to get Phoebe that bike! When I heard the story, I almost cried.
Rachel: (on phone) Ross, hi, it's Rachel. I'm just calling to say that um, everything's fine and I'm really happy for you and your cat...(cut)...I am over you. I am over you and that, my friend, is what they call closure. (She hangs up and tosses phone in the ice bucket.)
Ross: Ooh, I wanna switch to Rachel too!
Ross: Yeah, but, but look what I'm...
[Scene: Chandlers hotel room. Ross bursts into the room.]
(Ross and Rachel approach, theyre still yelling at each other.)
Ross: Because you sent away the dog!
Ross: What dog? There-there's no dog here.
Joey: Ross, you need some help?
Ross: Monica's crying. She's very upset about this whole Clunkers thing.
Elizabeth: This is my father, Paul Stevens. Dad, this is Ross Geller.
[Scene: Monica and Phoebes, Ross is on the phone, as Phoebe is walking by carrying a lamp.]
Ross: Oh really! Why is that?
Phoebe: Oh Ross, calm down, Ill give you the 80 cents. (Ross glares at Rachel)
Rachel: (holds a pair of panties in front of Ross) Ok, Well, what about these are white cotton panties. Would they go with whites or delicates?
Ross: You sure?