words in movies
[Scene: Joey's Apartment, Joey is reading a script as Ross and Chandler enter carrying a basketball.]
Ross: Oh cool!
Ross: Well do you want some help?
Ross: Awesome!
Ross: (simultaneously with Chandler) Yeah!
Chandler: (simultaneously with Ross) No!
Joey: All right. Uhh, okay. Our first contestant is Ross Geller. Why dont you tell us a little something about you Ross?
Ross: Well uh, I-Im a paleontologist. Umm, I-I live in New York. I have a son Ben. Uh, hi Ben! (Waves.) And uh
Joey: I said a little bit Ross. Now, how about you Chandler?
Joey: Its Ba-go-ta, but close enough. Now, you can either pass your turn to Ross or pick a Wicked Wango card.
Chandler: (To Ross) Can you believe how lame this is?
Ross: Im sorry, I dont believe contestants are allowed to talk to each other.
Joey: All right Ross youre in the lead, would you like to take another question or spin the Wheel of Mayhem?
Ross: The wheel has not been my friend tonight Joey. Uh, Ill take another question.
Ross: Its okay, Im ready.
Chandler: This is ridiculous, hes not gonna hold his breath (Ross cuts him off by taking a deep breath and holding it.)
Joey: This one right here. (Ross whines.)
Ross: (exhaling) The fear of Triscuts!
Ross: Its possible, they have really sharp edges.
Ross: Wait a minute, I-I believe Im entitled to use my Angel Pass for a free turn?
Ross: Yknow what? Youre just upset because youre losing.
Chandler: Oh come on Ross, I think were all losers here.
Joey: Okay, you picked the Gimmie card! You get all of Rosss points!
Ross: What?!
Ross: (To Chandler) You dont think its a little crazy that you get all my points just cause you
Rachel: She wants to move in with me and Ross to help take care of the baby.
Chandler: (disappointed and simultaneously as Ross) Hungry monkey.
Ross: (excited and simultaneously as Chandler) Hungry monkey! (To Chandler) Haaa! (To Joey) Id like a Wicked Wango card!
Ross: (thinking) Oh. (Pause) Oh! Oh my God! Okay, I know this, give me-give me a second!
Ross: Shut up! I Dream of Genie!
Ross: Id like to spin the wheel!
Ross: Is there a hopping bonus?
(Ross gets up and starts to hop on one leg.)
Ross: Ben Franklin.
Ross: Queen Victoria.
Ross: Noooo!!! Every time!!!
Joey: Oh my God! Congratulations Ross, because Chandler, youve been Bamboozled!
Ross: Yeah!!
Ross: (entering, out of breath) Hey!
Ross: I just Bamboozled Chandler! (Flexes in victory while everyone stares at him.) Which is not uh sexual thing. That was a quick shower.
Ross: Wow! It looks like we got a lot of good stuff.
Ross: (excited) A Play-Dough Barber Shop?
Ross: Uh, what?
Rachel: Yes! Shes gonna help us take care of the baby! Woo-hoo. (Sees that Ross isnt happy.)
Ross: WhatYoure not serious. I mean shes a very nice woman, but there is no way we can take eight weeks of her. Shell drive us totally crazy.
Mrs. Green: (entering from bathroom) Hi Ross!
Ross: Hi roomie! (Hugs her and looks at Rachel.)
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Mrs. Green is telling Ross what needs to be done to baby proof his apartment.]
Mrs. Green: and all those dinosaur nick-knacks you have Ross, I thought they might be more at home in the garage.
Ross: Well we we dont have a garage.
Ross: Yknow what? Maybe, Mrs. Green, its not absolutely vital that you live with us.
Ross: Im-Im sure thats not true.
Ross: Well uh, yknow what? Even if she doesnt know anything, I do! I have a son. And his mother and I didnt live together, and whenever he was with me I took care of him all the time, by myself.
Ross: Yeah.
Mrs. Green: With another woman. Have you no control Ross?
Ross: Thats a different issue. Uh, the point is, when the baby comes I will be there to to feed her and bathe her and change her. And more than that I want to do all those things.
Ross: Yes! Yes, youre gonna be so missed.
Ross: Well youre gonna be a wonderful grandma. (They hug.)
Ross: Oh, come on, every first time mother feels that way. Youllyoure gonna pick it up. (Rachel doesnt believe that.) Hey! You will! Uh look, yknow when you first came to the city? You were this spoiled helpless little girl who-who still used daddys credit card. Do you remember?
Ross: Look at you! WhatYoure-youre this big executive! You are much more capable than you give yourself credit for. I-I have no doubt youre gonna be an incredible mother.
Ross: Im telling you.
Ross: Oh. (Rachel and he start to stand up.)
[Scene: Ross and Rachel's, Ross is helping Rachel study for when the baby comes.]
Ross: You sure?
Ross: All right then. (Gets up, in an announcers voice) Rachel Green! Lets play Bamboozled! (Reading from a note card.) How do you test the temperature of the babys bath water?
Ross: Excellent! How do you put a baby down for a nap?
Ross: Thats correct! This is an audio question, what do you do when the baby makes this sound? (Makes a sound like someone is choking a cat.)
Ross: Excellent! Excellent, now-now do you want another question or a Wicked Wango card?
Ross: Oh, Im sorry youve been Bamboozled! Youre gonna be a terrible mother! (Rachel stares at him agape.) Ive lost sight of why were doing this! (Rachel gets up and walks away.)
Ross: (To Monica) Stop saying, "Blood" to strangers.
Ross: Delaware! (Starting to cry.) Delaware!
Ross: Hey! What's she doing back here?
[Scene: The Fire Escape, Joey and Ross have reached the last landing. Joey is tugging on the ladder that extends to the ground, but it wont budge.]
[there's a loud bang at the door so Ross opens it back up to find a shoe has been thrown at it]
Ross: Im asking you to do me a favor.
Ross: Yes! Youre the person who checked out my book?!
The Woman: Ross, sweetheart!
(Joey casually pushes Ross over the back of the couch and sits down proud of himself.)
Ross: (to Frannie) Hi Frannie, congratulations.
Mr. Waltham: Dont take that tone with me. (She looks evilly at him.) All-all right you can. (He looks over at Ross and Shrugs.)
Ross: Well
[Scene: Central Perk, everyone but Phoebe are there reading. Rachel is sitting on the couch flanked by Ross and Monica. She suddenly stops reading and starts blinking her left eye as if it's bothering her. The problem is that Joey is on her left and thinks she's winking at him and winks back. Ross is watching this and isn't quite sure of what to make of it.]
Monica: (looking up) Ross, whens this comet thing start?
Ross: (to Chandler) What are you doing?
Ross: Okay. So well Ill umm, (To Rachel) Ill have her home by midnight.
Ross: Huh?
Ross: Oh see, I-I needed a new thing for today and there's this leather store that always smells so good and I thought to myself, "Wow, (To Chandler) I never really owned a good smelling pair of pants before."
Ross: What?
Ross: Joey!
Joey: (whispering) Ross!
Ross: Show me where?
Ross: (he catches the ball and pauses, staring at Joey in disbelief) Also an island.
Ross: Rachel!! Monica!!
(Ross tries to dismiss it by making that sound, but decides to go for it and follows Rachel.)
ROSS: You know what, this is ridiculous, ok. This is your birthday, this is your party. I say we just put 'em all together and if they can't deal with it, who cares.
Ross: I cant believe this!!
Ross: Uhm no! Think less of you! No, I don't think less of you. I mean, you saw someone you liked and you kissed them. I mean, those people who like someone and don't kiss them... those-those people are stupid, I hate those people.
Ross: Two! Ive been engaged twice!
Ross: Okay. Well, you be careful.
Ross: So then if-ifI mean if you think about it, this is all (Pause.) your fault.
Ross: Yes, yes of course, what-what would this be regarding?
Ross: Look, I (He has trouble sitting in his chair.) Look, Im having a great time with you and I just dont want us to move to fast or put to much pressure on us. So, Im sorry I just dont think we should go away together yet. Its-its too soon.
Ross: well Phoebe, I think you'll feel better when you know a little bit about Vicrum, His a Kite designer (He makes a wow face) and he used to date Oprah. (He makes another wow face)
[Scene: The fire escape, Joey and Ross are still trying to figure out how to get down.]
ROSS: Not, not, not every night. You know, and... and it's not like I didn't try, Rachel, but things got in the way, y'know? Like, like Italian guys or ex-fiances or, or, or Italian guys.
Ross: Well, Im gonna lie to you Joey, its a possibility.
ROSS: [enters] Oh my God, what's goin' on?
Marc: Hey! Smile! (Points his camera at Ross and Rachel.)
Ross: Thank you, but I want to remove it Pheebs. I dont want to make it savory.
[Scene: Ross's apartment, Ross is whirling Ben around.]
Ross: Wooooooo, hehehe. Hey, ahh, you don't feel like you're gonna throw up, do ya?
[Scene: An airplane cabin, Ross and Rachel are both reading as a guy stops by their row.]
Ross: I would say that.
Chandler: That's why our honeymoon photos look like me and Diana Ross!
Ross: So what do you want me to do?
Ross: Hi.
Ross: Okay, here I go.
(Ross continues his trek south, and when they get face to face.)
Ross: Do not rush me!!
ROSS: Ok. Here's his diaper bag, and his uh, Mr. Winky, and uh...oh, him. Hi!
Ross: Yeah?
(Joey checks that Ross is not looking and dumps it in a plant.)
Ross: (disappointed) Sure, do whatever you want.
Chandler: Couldnt I just say, "This is Ross?"
Ross: I guess he musta gotten the part in that play.
Ross: Shut up! It was nice. I just... I don't think I'm the dirty-talking kind of guy, you know?
Phoebe: (To Ross) Kyles ex-wife? You were supposed to divert her not date her!
Ross: Come on, you know they love you.
ROSS: Uh, nothing, nothing's with him. Enjoy your coffee.
Ross: No, God no! That is no place for a woman. Those guys will grab anything.
Ross: No. No. You-you can't help. I mean, I kinda have to do this without your help.
Ross: Hey.
Monica: That was me and Ross.
Ross: Whats wrong with this year?
Ross: So they said our table will be ready in just a few minutes.
Ross: They kept your room for a while.
Ross: What?
Ross: Well, what is she goes down and-and sleeps with a bunch of guys?
Monica: Ross, we havent done the routine since middle school.
Ross: Dad?
Ross: Whoa-whoa-whoa, hey! Now remember what we talked about, you gotta be strong.
Ross: (entering with Monica) Hey!
Ross: Yeah.
Phoebe: Ok, so this is pretty much what's happened so far. Ross was in love with Rachel since, you know, forever, but every time he tried to tell her, something kind of got in the way, like cats, and Italian guys. Finally Chandler was like "forget about her" but when Ross was in China on his dig, Chandler let it slip that Ross was in love with Rachel. She was like, "Oh my god." So she went to the airport to meet him when he came back, but what she didn't know was, that Ross was getting off the plane with another woman. Uh-Oh! So, that's pretty much everything you need to know. But, enough about us. So, how've you been?
Ross: What?
Ross: No!
Ross: How are you ever going to sell this place?
Ross: Hey! Oh listen, I was just clearing some space for your stuff.
(Joey and Ross pause while they picture the event.)
[Scene: Ross's apartment, Ross is looking at his handbook. Elizabeth is also there.]
Carol: Ross. You're not actually suggesting Helen Willick-Bunch-Geller? 'Cause I think that borders on child abuse.
Ross: Well, can you blame her?
Ross: (angrily) AND ON MY TURF?
Ross: Sure! Ooh-ooh, what about this?
Ross: Hey.
Ross: Now, hold on! Hold on! (Stops him) Look, look, your daughter and I are supposed to leave tonight for our honeymoon, now-now you-you tell her that Im gonna be at that airport and I hope that shell be there too! Oh yeah, I said Rachels name, but it didnt mean anything, Okay? Shes-shes just a friend and thats all! (Rachel sits down, depressed.) Thats all! Now just tell Emily that I love her and that I cant imagine spending my life with anyone else. Please, promise me that youll tell her that.
Ross: Guess who? (Enters fully.)
Ross: Dr. Green. How are you? (offers his hand, and Dr. Green puts his scarf on it.)
Ross: Oh, I dont know how that got in there.
Kristen: Well uh, Ross? This is Joey. Joey? Ross.
Ross: Hi. (They shake hands.) Its nice to meet you. I used to have a friend named Joey. I dont anymore.
Ross: Dad?
Ross: Umm, your boxes are umm
Chandler: Well, I-I-I'm done with this. You want anything Ross? Sports? International? Apartment listings?
Ross: Yeah. So
Ross: Oh, sure. Whoa-whoa, what's this? The delivery charge is almost as much as the couch!
ROSS: Joey, you owe $1100 at I Love Lucite.
Ross: I meanno, its just cause, its just cause you and I were like a nightmare. (Screams.) No, but there was some good times.
Ross: So Joey umm, you look familiar. Are uh, are you on TV or something?