words in movies
[Scene: Central Perk. Phoebe is singing. Monica, Richard, Ross, and Rachel are listening.]
[Scene: Rachels bedroom; Rachel is awoken by a man singing in the next apartment.]
Monica, Joey, and Phoebe: [singing] I'm on top of the world, looking down on creation and the only explanation I can find...
[Scene: Library. Phoebe is singing.]
PHOEBE: (singing) I'm in the shower and I'm writing a song. Stop me if you've heard it. My skin is soapy, and my hair is wet, and Tegrin spelled backward is Nirget.
Phoebe: I'm telling you! Oh, okay! This is the part of the musical where there'd be a really good convincing song. (Singing) "Bam-bam, don't take no for an answer. Bam-bam, don't let love fly away. Bam-bam-bam-bam..."
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Phoebe is singing outside Monica and Chandlers door.]
PHOEBE: Listen. You are not going to believe this but, that is not me singing on the video.
(She sets down her bag and we travel back to slow motion world. She once again whips her hair around in slow motion with the love doctor Barry White singing in the background. And Id also like to take this opportunity to mention that she can also be seen in Starship Troopers and that she was born in Downers Grove, Illinois which just happens to be a few miles from where I live. Anyway Cousin Ross is now staring.)
Phoebe: (singing) Rosss can! Give me the tickets! Ross can give me the tickets!!
The Singing Man: (singing, duh) Mornings here! Sunshine is here! The sky is clear, the mornings here! The mornings here!
Phoebe: (singing) Rossss can!
Leslie: (singing) My best shoes, so good to me. I wear them everyday. Down at the heel, holes in the toes. Dont care what people say. My feets best friends, pals to the end. With them Im one hot chicky. Though late one night, not much light, I....
STEPHANIE: Thank you. I'd like to start with a song that I wrote for the first man I ever loved. (singing) Zachary.
KID: Excuse me. Is this where the singing lady is that tells the truth?
Chandler: (enters singing) Oklahoma where the wind comes sweeping down the plane, STOP IT! Why couldn't they have sent me to Texas? 7 o clock maybe I'll hit the gym (sits down) who am I kidding pay-per-view porn.
[Scene: Joeys bedroom, he is awoken by the singing guy.]
PHOEBE: [singing] There'll be times when you get older when you'll want to sleep with people just to make them like you. . . But don't. Cause that's another thing that you don't wanna do, everybody That's another thing that you don't wanna do.
Phoebe: So here is a, a very special holiday song that I wrote for some very important people to me. (singing:)
Rachel: (shakes her head) I guess... Oh, I just had such an idea of what this day would be like, you know? Emma laughing and everybody gathered around her cake singing "Happy Birthday". Then we would all go into... HEY GET OUT OF THE ROAD YOU STUPID STUDENT DRIVER!!! (honks furiously, and Ross looks at her in disbelief and Rachel looks at him.) They have to learn!
Waiters: (with birthday cake, singing) Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you, happy birthday dear �
Chandler: What are you singing?
Monica: It's just, I'm not good at singing.
Chandler: Okay, but this is the last time. (singing) With a chick-chick here, and a chick-chick there. Here a chick, there a chick, everywhere a chick-chick-(Joey enters)-chickeeeen.
Phoebe: (singing) Happy Chanukah, Monica! May your Christmas be snowy, Joey! Happy New Year, Chandler and Ross. Spin the draddle, Rachel!
Janices Voice: (singing) My funny valentine, sweet comic valentine! You make me high over my heart!
Phoebe: (singing) "Are you in there little fetus? In nine will you come great us? I will buy you some Adidas."
Janice: (entering and singing) Monica and Rachel had syrup, now I can get my man to cheer up. (laughs hysterically) Good morning Joey.
Monica: I can�t believe I did this. I can�t believe I'm singing for the people, and they liked me! Hey, did you hear thatone shouting �look at those tips�! I mean, did I really help you get a lot of tips?
Rachel: (singing) Love to love ya baby! Ow! Love to love ya baby! Ow! (There's a knock on the door, she turns off the music, puts on her robe, and goes to answer the door.) Love to love ya, baby! (There's another knock.) Darnit! (Looks through the peephole and turns on the lights.) Ugh. (She opens the door to Ross who's leaning against the door jam.)
Phoebe: (singing) Love is sweet as summer showers, love is a wondrous work of art, but your love oh your love, your love...is like a giant pigeon...crapping on my heart. La-la-la-la-la- (some guy gives her some change and to that guy) Thank you. (sings) La-la-la-la...ohhh!
Phoebe: Oh, this is like the best day ever. Ever! You guys might get back together, Monica and Chandler are getting their baby, there are chicks and ducks in the world again! Oh, I feel like I'm in a musical! (Singing) "Daa - raa... When the sun comes up, bright and beaming! And the moon comes..."
Monica: Hi! I'm Monica and I'm gonna be singing "Delta Dawn""Delta Dawn, what's that flower you have on? Could it be a faded rose from days gone by? ..."
PHOEBE: (singing) Lather, rinse, repeat, and lather, rinse, repeat, and lather, rinse, repeat, as needed.
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe is singing a new song as the gang looks on.]
Phoebe and Leslie: (singing) Sticky shoes, sticky shoes, always make me smile. Sticky shoes, sticky shoes, next time Ill.... avoid the..... pillleeeee.
Phoebe: (singing) Hold me close, young Tony Dan-za.
Helena: Before we go on with the show, I just want to say to the bride and groom how lucky they are to have found each other. In every life, a little rain must fall. Fortunately, in my life (Four guys wearing rubber boots, shorts, hats, and nothing else carrying umbrellas run onto the stage.) (Singing) Its raining men!
Ross: Guess who's here. It's the toughest guy in toy land, Ben. (singing) 'A real American hero. I'm G.I. Joe!' Drop the Barbi, drop the Barbi.
Singer: Okay, my next songs called: Phoebe Buffay, What Can I Say. I Really Loved When We Were Singing Partners, And I Shouldnt Have Left You That Way.
Janice: Oh! Youre right. Oh God. But, before I can say good-bye, theres something I really need you to know, Chandler. The way I feel about you, its like, I finally understand what Lionel Richies been singing about. Y'know, I mean what we have, its like movie love, youre my soulmate, and I cant believe were not going to be spending the rest of our lives together.
[Scene: The desert outside of Las Vegas, Joey is arriving and we hear the song, Name. Y'know, (singing) I've been through the desert on a horse with no name! It felt good to be out of the rain. In the desert, you can't remember your name, 'cause there ain't no one for to give you no pain. La la la-la-la, la, la, la, la-la-la. You get the idea. Anyhoo, he pulls up and stops. As he gets out of the car, he spills a huge pill of fast food containers out of the foot well.]
Phoebe: (with a fancy dress, still playing and singing): It wasn't just that she was fat, the woman smelled like garbage! Everyone! It wasn't just that she was fat the woman smelled like garbaaaaaage! (to Monica, showing her dress) Classy, uh?
Ross: Then, Fred Astaire singing The Way You Look Tonight came on the sound system, and the lights came down. And I got down on one knee and written across the dome in the stars were the words "Will you marry me?"
PHOEBE: Today we're gonna start with some songs about barnyard animals. [singing] Oh, the cow in the meadow goes moo, Oh, the cow in the meadow goes moo. Then the farmer hits him on the head and grinds him up, And that's how we get hamburgers. Nooowww, chickens!
Mrs. Burkart: (singing) You're a grand ol' flag, you're a high-flying flag, and forever in peace may you wave....
Singer: (singing) beside meeeee-eeee-ee. (everyone applauds her).
Phoebe: (Singing) "Ipan Stripan, Glupi Glabi! " And that is the Swedish National Anthem! Thank you for asking! (looks annoyed)
[Scene: The next morning on the street. Ross is dancing along, Singing in the Rain is playing. Two old ladies are sitting on a bench.]
PHOEBE: (singing) ... with the double double double-jointed boy. Hey. So um, are you the professional guitar player?
Phoebe: (singing) ...fuchsia and mauvvve. Those are the 66 colours of my bedroommmm. (applause) Thank you, thank you. Ohh, and I invite you to count the colours in your bedroom. (Sees that Phoebe Sr. has entered, and to her) Except for you. You go away.
Joey: Come on Pheebs! I cant take this anymore! Let-let me make it up to you. Huh? (Starts singing.) Ground control to Major Tom. Commencing countdown, engines on. Take your protein pills and put your helmet on!
Phoebe: (singing) "Little, tiny Tarzan, swinging on a nose hair. Swinging with the greatest of ease " Darn it! Now, I dont know who to get to the next verse.
Rachel: Well, well, well, hop back in bucko, cause I got four sixes! (lays down cards) I won! I actually won! Oh my God! Y'know what? (collects chips) I think I'm gonna make a little Ross pile. (holds up a chip) I think that one was Ross's, and I thinkohthat one was Ross's. Yes! (Starts singing): Well, I have got your money, and you'll never see it...
Chandler: (singing) Ill hold you close in my arms. (Phoebe enters) I cant resist your charms. And love....
Phoebe: Oh! What's the matter? Are you scared? You're afraid I'm a better singer? You're afraid I'm gonna beat you at singing?
Janices Voice: (singing) Youre look for laughable (She does the now patented Janice laugh.)
Phoebe: Now (Starts singing again) "Who will perform the ceremony! Who will perform the cer(Chandler enters and grabs her guitar and closes the door behind him)Ohoh! All right, Ill pound on him in the morning.
RACHEL: (after a pause with everyone staring at her, she goes up to the microphone) Ya, know what Barr, I'm not gonna leave. I probably should, but I'm not, see 'cause I promised myself that I would make it through at least *one* of your weddings (da-doom-chesh). See now, tonight, all I really wanted was to make it though this evening with a little bit of grace and dignity. Well (laughing), I guess we can all agree that's not gonna happen. There's nothing really left to say except....(starts singing) "Her name was Lola. She was a showgirl. With yellow feathers (band joins in), feathers in her hair, and a dress cut down to there. She would..."
Phoebe: Before I start, I just wanna say that umm, I have a cold, so if I sneeze in the middle of song, it's not on purpose. Oh, except the last verse of Pepper People. (Starts to sing) Smelly cat, smelly cat. What are they feeding you? (Stops singing) This chick sounds good. (Singing) Smelly cat, smelly--(stops singing) Hey Gunther, be a good little boy and bring me a whiskey.
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey is singing Happy Birthday to yet another good-looking woman. Gunther is watching and is not very happy.]
PHOE: [singing] There was a girl, we'll call her Betty, and a guy let's call him Neil. Now I can't stress this point too strongly, this story isn't real. Now our Neil must decide, who will be the girl that he casts aside. Will Betty be the one who he loves truly? Or will it be the one who we'll call Ju...Loolie? He must decide, he must decide, even though I made him up, he must decide!
Helena: (singing) For Im loved by a pretty wonderful boy! (Applause.) Hello! And welcome to the show. I see some of our regulars in the audience. And a couple of irregulars. (He starts going into the audience.)
Mrs. Burkart: (singing) Jeepers, creepers, where'd you get those peepers? Jeepers, creepers, where'd you get those eyes?
Phoebe: (overacting with a song this time) (singing) Gooood luck! Gooood luck! We all wish you good luuuuuuuuck!!!
Phoebe: (singing) Food here at 'Javu'..will kill you..the food here at 'Javu' ...will kill you..
(Ross resumes playing, this time accompanied by Phoebe screeching out Es in tune with Ross. While Phoebe is singing along, Rachel is having a very difficult time keeping a straight face. Thankfully, Ross gives up after a little while.)
Ben: (singing) Jingle bells, jingle bells...
Phoebe: (singing) "Went to the store, sat on Santa's lap. Asked him to bring my friends all kind of crap. Said all you need is to write them a song. They haven't heard it, so don't try and sing along. No, don't sing along.
Joey: Hey! (Singing) Get into gear!
Phoebe: (singing) Happy, happy Chanukah, Chandler and Monica. Very merry
Phoebe: (singing) Crazy underwear, creepin up my butt. (Jason enters) Crazy underwear, always in a rut. Crazy under-(sees Jason)-wear (In her head) Oh No! What is he doing here? All right, just keep playing, just keep playing. Youll get through this; youll be fine. (She tries to continue the song, but she has lost the ability to pronounce words, and the lyrics come out as gibberish.) (giving up on the song) Okay, thank you. And, as always no one talk to me after the show.
Monica, Joey, and Phoebe: (singing) I'm on top of the world, looking down on creation and the only explanation I can find, is the wonders I've found ever since...
The Singing Man: Oh come on! Mornings here! (Starts singing) Mornings here! The morning is here! Sunshine is here!
Chandler: (singing) Ground control to Major Tom! Commencing countdown engines on!
[Cut to inside, Monica, Joey and Phoebe are singing while outside, Ross and Rachel are trying to get the cat off of Ross' shoulder.]
[Chandler puts a coin in the mini jukebox at the table. YMCA starts playing and Monica and the rest of the staff have to get on the counter and start singing along and dancing. After a couple of couruses, Chandler pulls out a handful of coins and drops them on the table.]
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe is singing her holiday song.]
Phoebe: Okay. (singing) Jingle bitch screwed me over! Go to hell jingle whore! Go to hell Go to hell. Go to hell-hell-hell. Thats all I have so far.
[Cut to inside. Monica, Joey and Phoebe are singing while outside, Ross and Rachel are trying to get the cat off of Ross' shoulder.]
Chandler: (singing) The sunll come out tomorrow! Bet your bottom dollar that tomorrow (The girls start laughing, and in a deep voice) therell be sun.
Phoebe: (singing, drunk) My sticky shoes, my sticky-sticky shoes, why do you stick on me, ba-a-by! Thanks for the lights honey.
RACHEL: (singing) "...marenge, thank you honey, and do the cha-cha. And while she like to be a star, Tony always tended bar. At the, wait, wait, everybody.."
(They start singing, and Phoebe covers her mouth at the American part.)
Phoebe: (singing) Smelly cat, smelly cat, what are they feeding you? Smelly cat, smelly cat, its not your fault.
Rachel: (starts singing la la la la) Whatever happened to just singing for no reason? Huh?
Joey: (stopping him) Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! Whoa-whoa! We could have our own show! Y'know we could clap our hands together people will love it! Huh? And-and-and I wrote a song for us! (Singing, to the tune of This Land is Your Land) This hand is your hand! This hand is my hand! Oh wait, that's your hand! No wait, it's my hand!
CHANDLER: [singing to the tune of Mister Rogers' Neighborhood] Who's the bitterest man in the living room, the bitterest man in the living room? Hi, neighbor.
(Joey is singing in his head.)
Joey: (still singing) " Amy! Happy birthday to you!"
Susan: Keep singing! Keep singing!
Mrs. Burkart: (Singing) ...the lullabye of...
(Ross enters, singing.)
Ross: Oh, please. I am not singing to your stomach, ok?
Sergei: (singing) Touchet, touchet, Miss Americccan pie. (stops to correct Phoebe) Ameri-ccan.
[Scene: The Subway, Phoebe is singing for change.]
[Scene: Monica's apartment, Phoebe is singing.]
Joey: (starts singing) I wanna rock and roll all night! (Falls asleep.)
RICHARD: Ooh, then I guess the panty raid last night was totally uncalled for. Ok, I am going to take a shower and today I will be singing Jim Crochee's Leroy Brown.
Ross: (not wanting to tell her) Uh-oh, uh-oh, the laundry's done. It's, uh, it's a song. The laundry song that we sing. (singing) Uh-oh the laundry's done, uh-oh, uh-oh.
Phoebe: (singing) They found their bodies the very next day, they found their bodies the very next...(sees Ross and Susan staring at her) la la la la la la.