words in movies
Ross: Okay! Okay! Fine, Ill stop! No teaching, okay? Well just watch the pretty light streaking across the sky. (Comets dont streak across the sky, meteors do.) Okay? Whos official name is Bapstein-King.
Phoebe: (looking up) There it is! Oh, look at that! Isnt Mother Nature amazing?
Rachel: No. No, you cant.
Rachel: Oh I dont-I dont know.
Ross: Man, look at all those stars! (Yeah, you can see what? Five of them from the city?) Infinite space. It really, really makes you wonder, doesnt it?
Monica: Okay, weve been out here for two hours and we havent seen any stupid comets. Can we go now? I mean, Chandlers getting chilly. (She walks over to where Chandler is bundled up in a big coat and shivering.)
Phoebe: Oh! I wont say, no to a movie!
Ross: Joey comeI cant believeI bring you here to see the Bapstein-King comet, one of natures most spectacular phenomenon, and all you care about are bugs stuck in tar and-and some woman!
Joey: (annoyed) I dont know! (Goes back to looking through the pipe.) (Pause) Yeah, I do.
Joey: What?! All rightHey! Dont look at me! Youre the one who wanted to come up and look for some stupid Burger King comet!
Chandler: Sorry, I just cant sleep. Ooh! (Turns on the light and Monica groans.) Where is that book that you are reading with the two women who were ice-skating and wearing, wearing those hats with the flowers on it? Because every time I look at that cover Im like (Fake snores.)
Phoebe: (crossing her fingers and closing her eyes) Please dont be a space ship. Please dont be a space ship. (She turns on the light and looks around and finds that its the smoke detector thats beeping.) Oh thank God! (She moves a chair over and starts to investigate how to make the beeping turn off, in frustration she yanks the thing off of the wall. She sets it down and heads for bed, just as she gets there it beeps again. She opens the cover and removes the battery, but it still beeps.) How could you be beeping?! I just disconnected you! I took out your battery! How can
Phoebe: Dont interrupt me!!
Ross: I cant believe this!!
Ross: (standing at the edge of the roof) Yeah, I guess we dont have a choice. (Screaming to the street) Help us! Please help us! Were stuck up on the roof and we cant get down!!!
Ross: (To Joey) I know, I wasnt finished. (Joey motions him to finish.) (Yelling at the street) But dont worry! Were gonna go down the fire escape!!
Rachel: Okay please tell me that this is just one of your jokes that you do that I dont get.
Rachel: Yknow, like the thing when you put the phone in your pants? (He starts laughing.) Tag! Im serious! This isnt funny! Those contracts absolutely had to go out today!
Tag: Rach, Im sorry, but you didnt give me any contracts!
Rachel: Yes I did! And I put a little Post-It on it that said, "Must go out today," and underlined today three times and, and then I put a little heart in the corner because I didnt want to seem to bossy.
Tag: Okay I understand. (Sits down.) I wouldnt want to be proved wrong either.
[Scene: The Fire Escape, Joey and Ross have reached the last landing. Joey is tugging on the ladder that extends to the ground, but it wont budge.]
Joey: All right, it wont go down any further. Its stuck.
Ross: Yeah! Oh yeah, youll be fine! It-itll be uh, just like bungy jumping. Yknow? But instead of bouncing back up you-you wont.
Joey: (looks at the ground and at Ross) I dont know Ross! I-I tell you what, lets flip to see who does it, okay? You-you call it in the air, all right?
Joey: What? No! No Ross! No-no! Stop! Im not jumping! Okay, look I have an audition tomorrow and I cant go if I break my leg.
Ross: Well Im jumping! I have a son! Okay? He wont have a father if-if I die!
Rachel: Puzzler. A bit of a puzzle. Why dont you um, check the copy room, maybe you left the contracts in there?
Rachel: I dont know Tag! How can your genitals make phone calls? Okay? Its not a perfect world! Just go please.
Rachel: Thank you. (He leaves and she proceeds to plant the folder in his bottom drawer. She then picks up the phone and holds it to her breasts.) Hello? (Hangs up the phone.) I still dont get it.
Monica: You do know that was me who just said that right? (He doesnt respond and she turns on the light, waking him.) Hey. As long as were both up
Ross: (looking in the window behind them) Yknow, yknow Im lookin and I dont think anyones home here. I say we just break the window, crawl through, and-and yknow explain later.
Ross: I dont think so. Hello? (Knocks on the glass, which angers the big, large, angry dog behind the glass and causes them to jump to the other side of the landing.) When you get in there (Joey nods his disapproval.)
Chandler: Yeah! (Monica falls asleep) No! No! No! Dont fall asleep! Okay, I am going to make you some coffee. (Monica doesnt move as he gets out of bed and as hes heading for the door.) And I probably wont spill coffee grounds all over the kitchen floor.
Rachel: Well yeah, I wish that you would. (He opens the top drawer.) Well, no its not in there! (Closes it.) How about that drawer? (She points to the bottom one and he opens it. She doesnt see the folder she planted and bends over to check.)
Rachel: (thinks) Yknow, I dont-I dont know. Let me, let me check. (As she heads for her office, she stops glances over her should at Tag, looks into her office, and finds the folder on her desk.)
The Fireman: The next time you want to dump a fire alarm in a trash chute, dont wrap it in a blanket that says, "Property of Phoebe Buffay not Monica."
Phoebe: Theres a reset button?! Ugh, thank you! Thank you! (He exits and she goes to shut it off.) Theres a reset button! My God! Why didnt I see that! (She takes off the plastic cover and looks for the button.) Reset button, reset button, where is there a reset button? (Finds it.) Oh here it is! (Picks it up off of the floor.) Oh! (She presses it hard, but of course it would help if the button was still attached to the detector. In frustration she presses it so hard it causes pain in her thumb.) Ohh, God!
[Scene: The fire escape, Joey is now hanging off of the bottom rung of the ladder that wont move and Ross is watching from above.]
(Ross continues to climb down. He puts his other foot further down on Joeys torso, but that doesnt work very well and hes forced to wrap his legs around Joey. Which then forces Joey to get a nice and close view of Rosss crotch.)
Joey: Yknow, when we talked about face to face, I dont think we thought it all the way through.
Chandler: Hm-hmm, I told you! (Looks at the clock) I cant believe that Ive only got two hours before I call in sick for work.
Monica: I cant believe this! (Storms out.)
Monica: We’re waiting for the adoption lady, but, hey, I’m glad you’re here. I was cleaning this morning and I found this (she puts a box on the table and opens it). I don’t know if you wanna use it, but…
Phoebe: Umm, look it, you-you cant kill yourself.
Phoebe: No-no I cant! I cant let you do it!
Earl: It doesnt really seem like enough to be fate.
Chandler: Yes, if it really doesnt mean anything, because you know that Im just not ready
Kristen: Well Joey doesnt like to talk about it but, hes one of the stars of Days Of Our Lives.
Joey: Well, ah, Im an actor. Im fairly neat. I ah, I got my own TV. Oh, and dont worry Im totally okay with the gay thing.
Phoebe: Yeah, but you shouldnt compare yourself to me.
Monica: I cant believe you bought this.
Joey: All right, uh, weve got a little bit of a problem here. These people are my friends; you cant treat them that way.
Joey: Pheebs, I am so sorry! I know I promised you a fun road trip with your friend and I didnt deliver. But-but-but now I know that you think being awake is an important part of friendship! So, so, so I will strive to-to stay awake for as long as I know you.
Rachel: I dont know, I dont know. Urrrgh! Look, maybe we should take a break.
Ross: Well I have to. Okay? If I dont, theyll take the class away from me. And I already put it in my family newsletter.
Michelle: No don�t worry, this is not some rebound thing. I am totally over Eric.
Supervisor: (laughs) Why dont we do a trial run.
Ross: No! But we-we didnt have sex-uh, did we? I mean, I dont remember much about last night, it was such a blur.
Ross: I really wish that you wouldnt.
Ross: Dont thank me! If you wanna thank something, thank the volcano that erupted thousands of years ago, killing but perfectly preserving an entire civilization. (Rachel just looks at him.) Heres Warrens number.
Rachel: Ross, I really dont think
[Flashback to: A street, Ross is sitting in his newly purchased MGB. Which is one of the better British sports cars ever made. Of course, better is a relative term. Which reminds me of a joke. Why dont the British make computers? Because they couldnt figure out how to make them leak oil. Anyway, the gang is all staring at his new purchase.]
Joey: What, oh, oh, oh, no, no, I cant, I cant tell you that, its like the most awful, horrible thing Ive ever done my whole life.
Monica: Wouldnt you love to do it just once?! (Raises her hand towards Chandler.)
Chandler: Dont do it.
Sid: I still cant believe it! Im the luckiest guy in the world!
Ross: But-but, if you dont love this, well do it in any other place at any other time. Really, its fine, whatever you want.
Phoebe: I dont know.
Phoebe: I didnt know Playboy prints jokes.
Rachel: Well obviously I wont be able to come, for those of you who havent checked their calendars today is my due date. Well yknow, I just want to take a moment and thank you guys for how great youve been during this time. I really couldnt have done it without you. And I have loved these last nine months! And even though I am so looking forward to the next part, I am really gonna miss being pregnant.
Rachel: I dont think so.
Phoebe: No I didnt!
Rachel: Phoebe! You cant do th
Rachel: What handsome is not your type? Smart? Kind? Good kisser? What those things arent on your list? Ross is a great guy! You would be lucky to be with him!
Ross: I cant believe they-they didnt even tell us!
Rachel: Well why shouldnt I?!
Rachel: I dont know!
Phoebe: I’m sorry, I can’t believe I set you up with such a MONSTER!
Cecilia: They dont?
Phoebe: Yeah I know what I wanted to ask you. Um, can you roll your tongue? Because I can, and my Mom couldnt, and I thought y'know, I figured that was something I got from our Dad.
Ross: So-so come! Why dont you come?
Phoebe: Well, why dont you just get him fired?
Phoebe: I dont know. I-I think its still gonna be a while.
Joey: (as Jessica) I dont think so.
Joey: Yknow, we dont have to imagine.
Ben: Dont talk to me now!
Monica: (from the bedroom) Dont come in here!
Ross: Ehh, I dont, I dont think so. Shes already talked about yknow, dating other guys.
Chandler: You dont want to be guys, youd be all hairy and wouldnt live as long. (Starts to go to his bedroom)
Chandler: (To Monica) Yknow, we havent found anybody else.
Chloe: I want you to met some friends of mine. (Introduces him to Chandler and Joey) This guy is my hero, he comes in with some stuff he wants it blown up 400%, we said we dont do that, and he says you gotta. And y'know what, we did it. And now anytime anybody wants 400, we just say lets Ross it!
Monica: You dont have a car. And your license expired.
Joey: Give me a number, I dont want to owe you anything!
Chandler: Well then why cant I see it?
Ross: Okay! You guys are getting married tomorrow and-and I couldnt be more thrilled for both of you, but as Monicas older brother I-I have to tell you this. If you ever hurt my little sister, if you ever cause her any unhappiness of any kind, I will hunt you down, and kick your ass! (Chandler laughs.) What? Im-Im-Im serious! (Chandler laughs harder.) ComeHey! Dude! Stop it! Okay? Im-Im not kidding here!
Rachel: Dont do that.
Rachel: No! Dont say that! Dont say that!
Ben: Dont do that.
Chandler: But we dont know the neighbors.
Rachel: Oh my God! Oh my God! I cant go! Im gonna be too nervous!
(Chandler laughs, turns, and sees that Ross and Joey arent happy.)
Joey: I knew I shouldnt have mentioned it! Thats what I wanted to name my kid!
Rachel: When the Louis Vuitton people found out that Ralph Lauren wanted me back, the offered me more money! Isn’t that great?
Ross: (To Rachel) I wasnt talking to you.
Chandler: I would but mine doesnt fit. The pants are a little tight.
Rachel: Its just so frustrating! Why doesnt she want my breast?!
Elizabeth: Ohh, I wouldnt do it in there. Thats my dads bedroom.
Rachel: I didnt. I got under him.
Whitney: (outside the door) Uh, your door isnt sound proof.
Rachel: Joey I dont think you know what behalf means.
Joey: (opening his door) If I cant have it you cant have it! (Rachel walks away angrily.)
Joey: God, its gonna so weird like when I come home and youre not here. Yknow? No more Joey and Chans. No more J and Cs. "You wanna go over to Joey and Chandlers?" "Cant, its not there."
Monica: And Dad, yknow that mailman that you got fired? He didnt steal your Playboys! Ross did!
Phoebe: Oh my God! Youre right! Go! (Monica starts to leave.) Go tell Chandler! Hurry before its too late! Wait no! (Monica stops.) Does this also mean putting out doesnt get you love? (Monica is shocked.)
Joey: They have a kid together, y'know. Theyre like, theyre like a family, and if, I dont know, theres chance they could make that work, I know I wouldnt want to be the guy who stood in the way of that. Are you okay? Do you wanna ah, come poke a nude guy?
Joey: Yeah! Okay. (Joey picks a card.) Phoebe, you look, I cant.
Chandler: No-no! This is my fiancee (Phoebe) and her heart was set on that ring. You dont want to break her heart now do you?
Monica: (yelling after them) I cant believe youre gonna have sex on my engagement night!!
Phoebe: So that story doesnt make you cry?
Monica: Uh I really dont know what to tell you Rach, I really dont. I mean, maybe Joey can help you out with your, with your big work problem.
Chandler: Let me see this guy. (Phoebe hands him the picture.) W-H-Wow! Dont show this to Monica! And dont tell her about the W-H-Wow!
Chandler: I cant believe you dont know what I do for a living!
Joey: Its just I cant because my manager said I (Gets an idea) (Starts singing) "Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you. Happy birthday dear Annie
Ross: Yknow, I dont think were going to settle this.
Monica: Oh, yknow what, I cant, it really kills.
Monica: But you told them you werent?
Monica: So to get this part you cant be?
Joey: Yeah may-maybe you dont tell anyone about this.
Phoebe and Rachel: (to each other) I dont know.
Rachel: (giggles and cant look at him) Hi!
Phoebe: Hmm, they just dont make em like that anymore!
Rachel: Oh honey, dont worry. I really do feel like tomorrows the day.
Rachel: Seriously, your dad doesnt like pranks.
Rachel: And you know, we said that we would, we would live together as long as this makes sense. An maybe this, you know,Just doesn�t make sense anymore.
Rachel: Oh tomorrow, oh I dont know. Um
Ross: Anyway, if she, if she wasnt in to me, why-why would she ask me out again?
Kim: I didnt read it.
Chandler: No Rach, its not just you. My thirtieth birthday certainly wasnt that much fun.
Joey: Ah yeahwait a second now! Look were gonna have to set a spending limit on the date. I dont have the money to take her to a fancy place like that.
Joey: I dont think so.
Joey: You dont think I know that!