words in movies
Chandler: Well, it's just with uhm, work and the stress of adoption, we just don't feel like we have the energy. Plus, we don't think it's fair that every year the burden falls on us.
Ross: (skeptical) That doesn't sound like you... That's Monica talking!
Monica: You guys, I ordered some chocolate pies from that bakery on Bleecker. Could you pick them up for me?
Monica: No, no, no, I don't make chocolate pies. When I was younger I-I enter in this pie-eating contest. I ate so many that just the thought of them made me sick.
Rachel: Well, let's see... uh... I know that she has a meeting with her lawyer and then she has to make a very big poop. Why?
Rachel: ...is something I'm very interested in! Oh please, do not tell Ross. He still believes that (in a deep voice, mocking Ross) what's in the inside is important...
Chandler: Why come all the way from Kansas to do that?
Monica: You don't know that.
Chandler: You say that now, but it could take us a long time to get back home. Plus Joey could get lost and and they could have to page us to go pick him up.
Joey: Dude, two times that happened!
Phoebe: Okay. Rachel, the hottest babies in the Tri-State Area are in this room right now! I overheard one of the judges say that not one of them holds a candle to Emma!
Rachel: You heard them say that?
Ross: I know, I know! When I was here for Holidays on Ice (Joey looks around worried hoping no one heard that) I was sitting so far away Michelle Kwan couldn't read my banner!
Phoebe: Don't point that thing at me, Tribbiani!
Joey: Wait a second, wait a second, where have I seen that cowgirl outfit before...
Ross: I can't believe this, she's our daughter! That you would treat her like some kind of showdog is inexcusable!
Ross: Ooh, we'll say that we were mugged! You can't get mad at someone who's been mugged!
Joey: No. Here (he tears off the pocket from Ross' shirt, and tears off everything below that as well.)
Phoebe: We're just... we're trying to figure out an excuse. Hey! Ooh! How about this: We can say that Monica told us 5 o'clock, not 4 o'clock. That way we're right on time! (Others start to agree but she continues) OR... or, we can plant PCP in the apartment and call the cops on her.
Ross: (sarcastic) That would be a good way to get rid of all the PCP we have lying around.
Rachel: You know what, we just say that she said it was 5 o'clock. We'll just act casual. We're not late, we're right on time. (When she finishes talking, a note is pushed from under Monica's and Chandler's door, into the hall. Ross picks it up and reads it out loud)
Phoebe: Well, I'm not going in first. I bet that vein on Monica's forehead is popping like crazy.
Joey: I hate that thing, it's like a... bolt of lightning.
Ross: What is that?
Chandler: Yeah, and there's a bowl of cranberry sauce that... (speaking lower to Monica) what happens to cranberry sauce?
Joey: I had a dream once about a fax machine that did that. (Ross picks it up)
Monica: Hey, you touch that and you will be sorry.
Chandler: He's doing that weird eye contact thing. Don't look at him, don't look at him! (They both look away)
Monica: Oh my God! YOU FORGOT THE PIES? Well, I cannot believe this. You force me to make dinner, then you're an hour late and you forget the one little thing that I asked you to do.
Chandler: That would be a lot more convincing if you weren't drooling.
Rachel: Ewww, is that what that is?
Monica: Joey, that is not gonna work.
Chandler: A little late for that.
Joey: I just wanna say that I'm sorry I referred to the vein as a seperate person...
Joey: Oh, that smells good!
Monica: Okay, I have to get that. Now when I get back, I want you and your friends to be gone. Thanksgiving is over. The Vein has spoken.
Monica: That was the adoption agency...
Rachel: To Monica and Chandler... and that knocked up girl in Ohio.
Joey: Sure. I went through the exact same thing with Alicia Mae Emory... The waiting, the wandering... Then one day... I get that call from Toys "R" Us... She was in stock!
Chandler: That is the exact same thing.
Phoebe: I don't think you mean that.
Chandler: We can? All right, I'm tryin' that.
Ross: You mean that?
Rachel: Oooohh that’s interesting.
Phoebe: Well thats no way to sell newspapers. Why dont you try, "Extra! Extra! Read all about it!"
Mike: that is so wrong and on top of that his a glue sniffer.
STEPHANIE: Thank you. I'd like to start with a song that I wrote for the first man I ever loved. (singing) Zachary.
Kathy's Co-Star: Is that an expensive blouse?
Ross: Oh-oh-okay, but-but I know, that even though I've been a-a complete idiot up 'til now, I mean, I mean you-you-you have to come here. You have to come here so we can work this out.
Joey: You knew about that?
Rachel: And thats Phoebe (points), and thats Joey.
Joey: How'd you get to that?
Phoebe: I'm... I'm just... I'm the worst person ever. How can I not tell David that I'm seeing Mike?
Rachel: Come on! I dont want you thinking of me like that any more!
Phoebe: Yeah. Well, we called everyone in your phone book and bunch of people came, but it took us so long to get you here that they-they had to leave.
Rachel: OH! And the year before that, when you set up that nighttime tour of that button factory?
The Man: (To Ross) Excuse me. (He puts up a flyer that has a sketch drawing of Joey and it reads, "Warning! Intruder! If you see this creep - call the cops!") You should check this out, tell the other tenants. Apparently he's running around looking for some kind of a hot girl.
Phoebe: Wow! This place is incredible! (Gasps) Stings pen that he gave to Phoebe. (Puts the pen in her purse and goes over to a floor-to-ceiling bookcase) Come on! Secret passageway! (Starts pulling books at random as Trudie enters.)
Rachel: I am? Oh, look at that, yes I am. Enough about me, enough about me, Mr. Back from the Orient. Come on. I wanna hear everything! Everything. (Looks at Julie)
Monica: My God, I cant believe this! I mean I knew that mom and dad were invited, but I thought that was it! I mean from the ages 7 to 9 Frannie and I were inseparable!
Phoebe: No. No! Yes! Ahh. Oh, would you look at that Monica? I just knocked off all of your top scores, how sad.
Rachel: No? So youre saying that if I called it, it wouldnt ring?
Chandler: Yeah, we played, we watched TV.. that juggling thing is amazing.
JOEY: Why would I want another apartment, huh? I've already got an apartment that I love.
Rachel: All right honey, we'd better go if we wanna catch that movie.
Chandler: I think I can safely say that we all have family issues, work stuff and/or are sick.
Doug: But seriously, I believe that we should all support President Clinton. And her husband Bill. (Chandler does the laugh.)
MRS. GREENE: Did you know my husband has glasses just like that?
Chandler: So, are you really gonna go out with that nurse man?
Monica: Oh really? Okay? Well what would you say if I told you that, yknow, Ross or Chandler could beat you up?
Mrs. Geller: Its nothing, its just that now your Father owes me five dollars.
Joey: Tell me about it, huh? (Realizes that she can see Monica.) Oh no-no-no, I'm not with her, she's just Monica! (He pantomimes that out.) Ewwuck! (He pushes Monica away and makes a disgusted face.)
Monica: You do know that was me who just said that right? (He doesnt respond and she turns on the light, waking him.) Hey. As long as were both up
Joey: (thinking) Uhm... oh! Okay. You come with me, and you tell them that the house is haunted!
Phoebe: Oh my God! Is that him? (She points at someone.)
Monica: Wait-wait, go back to that sibling thing.
Chandler: Basically we just feel that he's...
Joey: Apparently he was this Russian dictator who slaughtered all these people. You'd think you would've known that!
Rachel: (takes off her robe) Oh! Look what happened! {Don't get your hopes up guys, we only get to see her from the back or from the neck up. Its times like these I wish that the networks would broadcast some nudity other than Denis Franz's butt.} (In her head.) Huh, check me out! I'm in my kitchen naked! I'm picking up an orange. (Does so) I'm naked! (Goes into the living room) Lighting the candles, naked, and carefully. (She backs anything that might have a point like a candle on her body away.)
Joey: I didn't know that! Well, what a pretty last name!
Chandler: Im just trying to help you out! Okay? I wanna make sure that youre okay.
Rachel: ...I think that bitch cracked my tooth.
Ross: Why, why, why would you dream that?
Phoebe: What?! Well he never said that to me!
Joey: Do you mind crouching down a little bit, so that I look taller? (Chandler does so) There you go. (And they walk down the red carpet.)
Monica: Thats not true, you dont have a moustache.
ROSS: But I don't know it. What I do know is that you owe $2300 at Isn't it Chromantic.
Rachel: See? Why, Gavin, why? Right when I'm about to change my opinion of you, you go and you ... (he kisses her) and you do that ... (they kiss again)
Chandler: Well you know that thing you said before, I'd be lying if I said I wasn't intrigued.
Joey: I wish. No. After dinner, me, her, and Pepper all fell asleep in front of the fire. Well I woke up in the middle of the night and I saw that the fire was dying out. So, I picked up a log and threw it on. Or, at least what I thought was a log.
Phoebe: Oh, that sucks!
ROSS: [on the phone] Woah, woah, woah australopithicus isn't supposed to be in that display. No. No. No, n, homo-habilus was erect, australopithicus was never fully erect.
Phoebe: Oooh, I love family traditions like that. When uhm... when Ursula and I were kids, on our birthday, our stepdad would sell his blood to buy us food!
Monica: Y'know what, thats fine, maybe you havent grown up, but I have.
Paul: Dont worry about it, I just didnt realize you were married. (Rachel returns and hears that.)
The Stripper: Yeah, that would be great. So I guess umm, good night.
Phoebe: Oh that tart... floozy... giant...
Chandler: Well Ive-Ive never done that with you before.
Joey: (laughing hysterically) Youre right! That did cheer me up!
Joey: That makes more sense.
Rachel: (to Chandler) Well, there's a kiss that he won't forget for a couple of hours, y'know.
Charity guy: Wow! Are you here to make another donation the same day? I don’t think that that’s ever happened before.
Monica: Why? It's just that I've waited seven years for an opportunity like this, and you can't even wait four and a half minutes for a stupid onion tartlet?
Monica: Oh, well. Now that I'm here I might as well help you with the cleaning and organizing! Just happen to have my label maker!
Carol: That could be it.
Ross: No, it turns out that the one from uptown was making a joke. But it was a different joke than I thoughtit wasnt that funny. So Im still torn.
Gary: It's a witness not a perp. And no one talks like that!
Rachel: Yeah, you know, was I looking forward to going to Paris? Sure. You know, was I excited about working in the fashion capital of the world? Ooh, absolutely... Oh...! Yeah, but you know, this is... it's fine. I'm fine going back to a job where I've pretty much gotten everything out of that I possibly can... (she sits down, and Ross who is stunned to hear all this follows her example)
Joey: Man that was great! Huh? Can you believe how long we threw that ball around?
Phoebe: Was it really that bad?
Dr. Drake Remoray: Thats right Wesley! I just stopped by to say that, youre not a real doctor! And that womans brain, is fine!
Rachel: Oh okay, Ill fix that to. Whats her e-mail address?
Rachel: Oh, umm, I was just yknow working out and umm Oh, thats it.
Monica: Well thank God you were here! I mean, we have to erase that!
Rachel: Okay. So, can I serve you a little ofWhat? What? What? (She sees that Joshua isnt relaxed.)
Monica: W-wait. What is that?
Joey: Hands! It is absolutely essential that you tell me what room the man my assistant described is staying in. Hes a patient of mine, Ive been treating him for years!
Gunther: Yeah, thats what I drive. I make four bucks an hour, I saved up for 350 years!
Chandler: (To Ross) No, thats okay. (Ross nods and retreats.) Monica I thought this was going to be the most difficult thing I ever gonna had to do. But when I saw you walking down that aisle I realized how simple it was. I love you. Any surprises that come our way its okay, because I will always love you. You are the person I was meant to spend the rest of my life with. You wanna know if Im sure? (He leans in and kisses her.)
Monica: Yeah, well, is that better?
Ross: Thats okay, Im cool over here. Ill catch up with you later, Joey. (Joey is shocked.)
(Ross smiles slightly.� Then he gives a single nod that lifts him to his feet.� He exits the coffee shop.
Chandler: Look I'm very glad that you saved Ross from the car backfire, but y'know, it could've been a bullet and you y'know, you didn't try to save me!
Phoebe: No, I made myself take an oath. Yeah, no fooling around with clients and umm, always be prepared. Yeah, that ones actually from the Boy Scouts, but it just makes good sense.
PHOEBE: [looking at a water sculpture that looks like a window with rain running down it] Hey, excellent, excellent water-table thing.
Ross: (loudly) Why?! Are there like bears or something?! (Looks around and then sees that Elizabeth is shaking her head no and realizes what Elizabeth meant.) Ohh. Oh, protection. Yeah-no, yeah-no, that-that-that I forgot.
Phoebe: Ohh, no. (Pause) Oh okay, so you're a cop which means you can park anywhere, 'cause I know that 'cause I'm a cop too. So, all right, keep up the good work. 10-4. (Tries to leave.)
Rachel: Who was that?
Chandler: Last time I do that, I promise.
Monica: Yeah! I mean it was really funny, I-I just don't think you got it. You see Kara's coffee is-is-is weak tasting, okay? But-but what Doug was-was imply that it was weak physically. You get it now honey?
Rachel: Ohh, I'm gonna miss that big old squishy butt.
Rachel: Oh please. Okay, anyone in this room think that I would send Ross begging symbols, please show of hands. (Ross raises his hand and no one else.)
Joey: Hey, hang up! You get food poisoning just talkin to that place.
PHOEBE: Maybe that's because you haven't taken the time to get to know him. Let's remedy that, shall we?
Ross: This is fun. Hey Rach, remember that whole "We were on a break thing?" Well, I'm sorry, will you marry me? (Laughs--whines as he sees that no one is laughing. They're just staring at him in shock.)
Phoebe: Ok. Do we have to talk like that then they're not around? (She sees Rachel) Oh, no, no! Listen, is there someone who can fill in for me?
Monica: No! Listen, Im not gonna go through this with you again, okay. Just once I wanna beat when you cant blame it on the broken nose, the buzzer, or the fact that you thought you were getting mono. Lets just call this, tie score and its halftime.
Monica: All right, I know youre hurting, and-and I want to be supportive, but dont say that again.
Rachel: Well, isnt, isnt that gonna be weird?
Phoebe: Oh thats good, I guess shell have a choice between my guy and your weirdo.