words in movies
Joey: (lying on a beach towel, recapping what happened in the last episode) Okay, so we went to the beach, because Phoebe found out about this lady who knew her mom and dad, and I dont really know what happened with that.
[cut to Phoebe Sr.s house, from the last episode]
[cut to Monica opening the door of the beach house, with Chandler trying to pick her up for a date.]
[cut to a montage of scenes involving Bonnie, Ross, and Rachel from the last episode.]
Joey: (voice-over) Oh-oh! And then Rosss new girlfriend, Bonnie, shows up and Rachel convinced her to save her head. And then Ross and Rachel kiss, and now Ross has to choose between Rachel and the bald girl and I dont know what happened there either...
[cut back to Joey on the beach towel]
[Scene: The beach house, its the same scene from the end of last year, with Ross in front of the two doors of Rachels and Bonnies rooms, trying to decide which door to choose. He finally chooses the one his right and goes in.]
Ross: Yeah. (closes the door, and goes over and kisses Rachel.)
(They both kiss again and fall onto the bed.)
Rachel: Well, cant you tell her that you are not in the mood?
Ross: Yeah, yeah. (opens the door) It wasnt every morning.
Phoebe Sr.: Well, Im so sorry. I thought I was leaving you with the best parents in the world, I didnt even hear about your Mom and Dad til a couple of years ago, and by then you were already grown up. I dont know, youre here, and I would, I would really, I would like to get to know you.
Phoebe: Yeah, well, everybody does! Im a really cool person. And y'know you had 29 years to find that out, but you didnt even try! Y'know what, you walked out on me, and Im just, Im gonna do the same thing to you.
(She walks out and slams the door.)
[Scene: The beach house, Joey and Chandler are sitting at the dinner table, Monica is looking in the fridge.]
Monica: (closing the fridge in disgust) Shoot! Were out of soda.
(The gang is shocked.)
[Scene: The beach house, Rachels bedroom. She is finishing up writing something as Ross walks through the door.]
Ross: Well, it was loong. I didnt even realise how late it was, until I noticed the 5 oclock shadow on her head. (They both start to laugh, then stop themselves quickly.) Anyway, she didnt want to stay. I called a cab; she just left.
Rachel: (handing him the letter) Its just some things Ive been thinking about. Some things about us, and before we can even think about the two of us getting back together, I just need to know how you feel about this stuff.
Ross: Okay. (He leans in to kiss her again, but she leans back preventing him from making contact.) Wow, its-its 5:30 in the morning. (Rachel laughs) So, Id better get cracking on this baby.
Ross: Okay, Ill be up in, (looks at the letter) 18 pages. Front and back. Very exciting.
[Scene: The beach house, the next morning. Ross is passed out on the kitchen counter. He wakes up with a start and has one of the pages of the letter stuck to his face.]
Ross: Oh. (looks at his watch) Oh-oh. (takes a drink of coffee and resumes reading the letter)
Rachel: (coming down the stairs) Hey! (Ross jumps up, and quickly puts the letter back together, pretending like he has just finished it.) What happened to you? Why didnt you come up?
(Rachel stands there for a moment, starting to cry. Then gasps and runs over and hugs him. While hugging her, Ross tries to find the Does it? part in the letter.)
Rachel: I know. (Hugs him more violently this time and pushes him back away from the letter.)
[Scene: The beach. Chandler and Monica are out getting some sun.]
Chandler: All right, theres a nuclear holocaust, Im the last man on Earth. Would you go out with me?
Joey: (jumping up in a hole that he is digging, he is shoulder deep) Hey, you guys! Take a look at this! (Chandler and Monica jump up and go over to the hole.) Check this baby out, dug me a hole!
(A wave crashes on the beach and partially fills up his hole.)
Joey: (climbing out of the hole) What?! What?!! What is it?!
Chandler: Well, can we help?! You want us to take you back to the house?!
Joey: Yeah, and Im a little tired from digging the hole.
Monica: Oh damn the jellyfish. Damn all the jellyfish!
Joey: Dont blame me, I saw it on The Discovery Channel.
Chandler: Y'know what, hes right. Theres something like uh, ammonia in that, that like kills the pain.
[Scene: The beach house, Phoebe is coming down the stairs all packed and ready to go.]
Phoebe: Well, Im ready to get the hell out of here! (Sees Ross and Rachel cuddling on the couch.) Oh. Are you? Are you?!! (they nod Yes.) Ohh! Thats so great!! Ooh, not for Bonnie. (they nod No.) But for you, yay! Ohh.
(The rest of the gang arrives with their heads down in shame.)
Rachel: How was the beach?
Phoebe: Okay, Im gonna put this (her suitcase) in the car.
(Rachel kisses him, and goes upstairs. After shes gone, Ross frantically tries to find and read the Does it? part.)
Ross: (finding the part) (looks up in disgust) It so does not!!!
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross is telling Joey and Chandler about the letter.]
Ross: Fine! Fine! But this break-up was not all my fault, and she, she says here, (reading from the letter) If you accept full responsibility... (to Chandler and Joey) Full responsibility! ...I can begin to trust you again. Does that seem like something you can do. (yells at Joey) Does it?!!
Chandler: Look, Ross, you have what you want, youre back with Rachel. If you bring this up now youre gonna wreck the best thing that even happened to you.
Ross: What the hell happened on that beach?!
Joey: Its between us and the sea, Ross!
Phoebe: (to the person that answered the door) Hi, Ursula.
Ursula: Right, okay, the one that lives in Montuak, umm-hmm.
Ursula: (disgusted) Hang on. (She goes into her apartment and slams the door in Phoebes face.)
(Ursula opens the door and hands her the note.)
Phoebe: (reading from the note) Good-bye Phoebe and Ursula. Ill miss you. P.S. Your Mom lives in Montauk. You just wrote this!
Ursula: Well, its pretty much the gist. Well, except for the poem. You read the poem, right?
Ursula: All right, hang on! (She takes the note, goes back into her apartment and slams the door shut.)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Chandler, Monica, and Joey are sitting at the table eating dinner and not talking. Ross and Rachel are outside cuddling on the balcony.]
Monica: Pass the cheese, please.
(Joey hands her the cheese without looking at her.)
Monica: (interrupting) All right!! All right. (walks slowly into the living room) I got stung. Stung bad. I couldnt stand. I-I couldnt walk.
Chandler: (following Monica) We were two miles from the house. Scared and alone. We didnt think we could make it. (He goes to put his hands on Monicas shoulders but for some reason can quite complete the action and pulls back.)
Joey: And I was tired from digging the huge hole!
Joey: Id seen this thing on The Discovery Channel...
Ross: Wait a minute! I saw that! On The Discovery Channel, yeah! About jellyfish and how if you... (stops suddenly and turns to look at Monica) Ewwww!! You peed on yourself?!
Monica: You cant say that!! You-you dont know!! I mean I thought I was gonna pass out from the pain! Anyway I-I tried, but I-I couldnt...bend that way. So... (looks at Joey.)
Joey: Thats right I stepped up! Shes my friend and she needed help! And if I had too, Id pee on anyone of you! Only, uhh, I couldnt. I got the stage fright. I wanted to help, but there was too much pressure. So-so I uh, I turned to Chandler.
Chandler: (wails loudly into his hands) Joey kept screaming at me, Do it now! Do it!! Do it! Do it now!! Sometimes late at night I can still here the screaming.
Phoebe: (singing) ...fuchsia and mauvvve. Those are the 66 colours of my bedroommmm. (applause) Thank you, thank you. Ohh, and I invite you to count the colours in your bedroom. (Sees that Phoebe Sr. has entered, and to her) Except for you. You go away.
Phoebe Sr.: No, Im not done. I-I-I just want you to know that I, the reason I didnt look you up was, well I was afraid that youd react, just well like, the way, the way youre reacting right now, and cant we just, y'know, start from here?
Phoebe Sr.: You do?! Wait, I like umm, the Beetles.
[Scene: Rachels bedroom. Ross and Rachel have just finished consummating the new relationship.]
Rachel: Ooh, I was soo nervous about that letter. But the way you owned up to everything, it just showed me how much youve grown. Y'know?
[cut to Monica cleaning the floor in the kitchen]
Ross: (yelling from the bedroom) WE WERE ON A BREAK!!!!!!!
Ross: And for the record, it took two people to break up this relationship!!
Ross: I didnt know what I was taking full responsibility for! Okay?! I didnt finish the whole letter!
Ross: It was 5:30 in the morning, and you had rambled on for 18 pages. Front and back!! (they go into the living room, trapping Monica, Chandler, and Joey in the kitchen) (to Rachel) Oh-oh-oh, and by the way, Y-O-U-apostrophe-R-E means you are, Y-O-U-R means your!
Ross: (starts to cry) FINE BY ME!! (he opens the door and traps Chandler behind it)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Chandler and Monica are playing cards at the dinner table.]
Monica: Okay, all right, I think youre great, I think youre sweet, and youre smart, and I love you. But you will always be the guy who peed on me.
Joey: Thats okay. Chandlers the one Im mad at.
Monica: Great. So the ball is in his court?
Chandler: Yes, and we all know how cruel a parent can be about the flatness of a child's pillow.
Rachel: You are right there with Emily. And its yknow, its kinda like . its a tie! Well, I gotta get, I gotta get back to the dishes.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, the gang, except Joey, is there. Phoebe is, well you y'know.]
(Monica is standing by the crib, and she's looking at her babies.)
Chandler: Gee if only she were one and had no idea what the hell a birthday was!
(They start to kiss, and Ross rushes into the office to break it up.)
Rachel: Ohh-ho-hooohhh. The hair comes out, and the gloves come on.
(Dan turns on the TV and the Happy Days theme song comes on.)
Rachel: Im funny? Oh thank God! Well hey, Ive got a ton of these! Umm, oh hearDo you want a good one? Heres a good one. Umm, you uh, you take a quarter, take a quarter and, and you blacken the edge. Right? (Does so.) And then you say to person, I bet you cant roll this quarter from your forehead to your chin without it leaving your face. And then when they do it, theyre left with a big black pencil line right down the center of their face.
Rachel: (Looking through her purse.) Okay, you know what? I dont have it, but I can tell you exactly where it is on my night stand, and...okay. But you know what? I have my drivers license and I have a twenty. (She slides it across the counter.)
Estelle: (Looks confused) Let me start over. I just got a call about an audition. I think you can still make it. It's down at the Astor Theatre and you need to have a monologue prepared.
Ross: Okay here, have one of these peppers. Oh ha Oh God! So so hot! (Rubs his eyes.) Oh my(Laughs.) By the way, you dont want to touch the pepper and then touch your eye.
[Scene: The casting directors office, Joey is there to show off to the director, so to speak.]
Ross: Well, I kinda half to. I mean, because the thing is
(There is a knock on the door, Phoebe answers it, its Mr. Heckles)
Pete: Look, the only who stands to get hurt is me. And Im okay with that.
[Cut to the hallway, Janine is entering as Monica is taking out the garbage.]
Ross: (in the same low voice) Answer better, answer better!
Joey: (to Chandler) Hey, that is so great about the job.
Monica: (closing the door) Its unbelievable! I-I cant believe that sign didnt work!
Chandler: The floating heads do make a good point.
Monica: Okay, come here! (Phoebe joins them in the hug.)
Ross: Chandler!!! Chandler!!! (He opens the door to the apartment but is stopped by the chain; Chandler and Monica quickly stop making out and try to get dressed.) Chandler, I saw what you were doing through the window! Chandler, I saw what you were doing to my sister! Now get out here!
[Scene: Central Perk. Monica, Phoebe and Rachel are on the couch.]
(Hits the ball towards Chandler who returns it back to him. He then hits the ball at Monica who slams it and it bounces off Kara's leg.)
Monica: Hes retiling my floor. (they both run to the bathroom)
Joey: I'm always on the swings! What am I doing wrong?!
Ross: Nothing, nothing. Lee-lo, the laundry's done.
Phoebe: No, youre too late!!! She already took out the trash!!!
Chandler: Great! Okay, here. (Holds the ring up for him.)
Phoebe, Ross, Chandler, and Joey: Push her down the stairs! Push her down the stairs! Push her down the stairs!
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Joey is on the phone and Phoebe is watching him.]
Rachel: Ohh, gosh. You guys, come on, this isI have to meet Joshua! This is my one chance for him to see the fun Rachel. Yknow the "Wouldnt it be great if she was my wife" Rachel. Ohh, all right! Are Joey and Chandler back?
(The chain breaks loose from the wall, and because Joey was pushing with all his might, he propells into the kitchen, towards the table with all the food. This table has wheels underneath it, and when Joey falls on this table, he rides into the living room, with all the food falling off, until finally Joey also falls off... Joey gets up quickly, a bit agitated, and acting as nothing happened. He is covered in food stains.)
Joey: (To Monica) Hey, so what is the big surprise?
Ross: Hey Pheebs, you know I'm i'm really glad you came to talk to me the other day and I hope I was a little helpful.
Ross: I told her I'd have to think about it. I mean, how the hell am I supposed to make this kind of a decision? (They're all quiet.) I'm actually asking you!
[Scene: Ross's Apartment, theres a knock on the door and he opens it to Mona.]
Phoebe: Oh, yeah, thats the word I use when I cant remember the real thing.
Joey: Oh, ooh the food smells great, Mon!
Monica: Its coming from the living room.
(He walks up onto the altar and notices the rabbi.)
(Monica goes over and grabs the pesto.)
Monica: (in the kitchen with Chandler) Look at them, they're-they're panicked!
Rachel: Hi. What are you doing here? Isn't this against the rules?
Ross: Heres your girlfriends button. (Holding the button.)
Gary: Listen Chandler, the way I see it is that I was lucky enough to find someone that I really love. I justI wanna be around her as much as I can.
[Ross comes out of Rachel's bedroom in her bathrobe and heads for the bathroom. On his way back, Richard comes out of Monica's bedroom in her bathrobe.]
Phoebe: Oh, see, Jack did love the cow.
Phoebe: (entering with Rachel) and I-I can't take it! Y'know? I'm just, always afraid one of them is gonna catch me with the other one. It's making me crazy.
Joey: Yes we do! Now look, that was the best nap I ever had!!
Chandler: Well the vet seems to think thats shes becoming a rooster. (The rooster crows.) Were getting a second opinion.
(Monica Enters. Chandler is in the kitchen with his laptop)
Ross: I want to go to the bathroom. (exits)
Rachel: Well, y'know, the reason I didn't wanna go running with you is because um, well y'know the way that you run is a little...(Starts flapping her arms)
Ross: Whats that on the bottom?
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Joey is standing at the counter as Monica enters carrying a tray.]
Phoebe: Okay. (The car moves a few feet and sputters to a stop.) Oh, no!
Ross: Oh, it's not so bad. Monica's gonna make potpourri! I think I'm gonna go wander out in the rain for a while.
Spokeswoman: And the man who made all this possible... Mr. Peter Becker.
Chandler: It's okay. Go take the test and see if we're okay.
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Chandler and Monica are standing in the kitchen.]
Ross: No! No! Oh my God. Did she get off the plane? Did she get off the plane?
Rachel: (on phone) Hello, Mark? Hi, its Rachel Green. (listens) Oh no, dont you apologize. (listens) Yeah, Ill hold. (to Monica and Ross) He left my number at work, but he was helping his niece with her report on the pioneers.
MONICA: All right, get your coat, we're going to the hospital.
The Teacher: Oh, their number is on the contact sheet.
Chandler: Forget it! Okay, Im not giving up the apartment.
Rachel: Oh, yeah, I had too. There was never any parking by the Psychology building.
Ross: Listen man, uh, I'm sorry the audition didn't go so well.
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Joey and Chandler are getting ready for the flight to London and Monica comes running in.]
Phoebe: Oh... then I overpaid. (she goes to the bathroom)
Chandler: Fine, I'll give the suit back.
Chandler: (jumps back and points at the cigarette) Oh my God!
Rachel: (stopping him) Wh-whoa! All right, okay-okay, I see, I see what's going on here! Now listen, look-look, I'm sorry if I gave you the wrong impression, but I am not some hussy who will just sleep around to get ahead! Now even though I (He tries to interrupt and tell her about the ink), hey-hey-hey, even though I kissed you, that does not give you the right to demand sex from me. I do not want, this job that bad. Good day, sir. (She storms out of his office.)
Ross: Yes! No-no! I know, I know what the list is! Mom! Look if you see Chandler, could you just let him know Im looking for him?
Rachel: Oh, you're not gonna tell the whole story about how your parents got divorced again are you?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's. Phoebe is reading the paper and Joey enters.]
Ross: Well, I added the 'exactly like me' part... But she said she's looking for someone, and someone is gonna be there tonight.
Monica: Yeah. I guess. (She puts more money in the bucket.)
Phoebe: Well, it helps the bee look tough in front of his bee friends. The bee is happy and I am definitely not.
[Scene: The Airport, Carol and Ross are waiting for Emily and Susan to deplane. A gorgeous woman walks by and they both turn to watch her go.]
Joey: Know what was great? The way his smile was kinda crooked.
Monica: I love the "I forgot the present" fake out!
Rachel: And now, y'know, I'm like... I'm like the other woman! I feel so..
Tour Guide: Thats just the way it is.
Ursula: Um, yeah, I'm just... (waving dismissively at the concept) ..working.
Rachel: (Joey walks to the door) Although...
Phoebe: Oh, wait, she's walking across the floor.. she's walking.. she's walking.. she's going for the pizza- (Yelling) Hey, that's not for you, bitch! (Phoebe covers her mouth with her hand walks away from the window.)
Rachel: Yes it is! I saw you guys going at it behind the card catalog!
Phoebe: Hey! Ooh, how was your first day working at the restaurant?
[Scene: A restaurant, Joey and Rachel are still hugging as a waiter walks by the table to talk to the annoying waiter from before who is watching.]
Phoebe: Good. (Phoebe and Mrs. Burkart go into the other room, leaving Monica with everyone staring at her.)
Monica: (takes the phone from Ross) Come on. (Answering phone) Hello? (Listens) Im sorry you have the wrong number. (Listens) (Whispering) Okay, Ill call you later dad. I love you. (Hangs up.)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, (And thats the last time for that line, no more Chandler and Joeys or Monica and Rachels, ever!) Joey and Ross are carrying the last table of Rachels. Rachel follows slowly, but is stopped by Monica.]
Chandler: Maybe, she doesnt hit him all the time.
Joey: (To Phoebe) Hey, is uh the rest of my candy bar around here?
Mona: Ross, we we have to be strong. Okay, I-Im gonna go. (She picks up the shirt Ross has just set down.) Can I? To remember you?
Dr. Harad: Okay, you're at ten centimeters. Time to start having some babies. All right, I want only the father in here please.