words in movies
Joey: Her first cookie? She has cookies all the time!
Joey: No! No... and, for the record, I've also never given her a frosting from a can!
Monica: Hey Rach, the adoption agency needs letters of recommendation and we were wondering if you would write one for us.
Monica: Yeah, it's just we don't think of you as really being so much "with the words".
Rachel: OH! What's it the anniversary of? Your first date, your first kiss, first time you had sex...
Ross: (Writing on the papers) B, B, B, B, B!
(they start kissing but someone knocks at the door)
Amy: (yelling from outside) Rachel!! Open up!! It's your sister!! (she knocks on the door again) I have to talk to you!!
Ross: (he opens the door) Hi Amy!
(Ross enters the apartment with Amy)
Amy: Yeah! Hey, sure! The "Days of Our Lives" guy!
Rachel: (Emma starts crying in the other room) Oh sorry, hold on. Let me just check on the baby!
Joey: I know, she may be the hottest girl I've ever hated.
Ross: Watch. (he takes the laptop) Here, you ehm... You highlight the word you want to change. Go under Tools and the Thesaurus generates... 'gives'... 'gives' a whole list of choices. You can pick the word that sounds smartest.
Joey: Oh my God, that's great! I'm smart!! No, no, I'm... (he uses the Thesaurus) "brainy, bright, clever", I love this thing! Look out ladies, Joey Tribbiani's got the whole package!!
Amy: A-And it's on Fifth. And the elevator opens up right into the living room.
Rachel: Sweety, I gotta tell ya... it sounds a little bit like you like the apartment more than you like...
Amy: Humpf, remember him? How we used to make out all the time after you went to sleep.
Rachel: Sometimes just nodding is ok. (pause) Uhm, so but anyway, listen, not marrying Barry was the best decision that I ever, ever made. Honey, you deserve true love. Your soulmate is out there, somewhere. Someone that is your age, that is smart, that is fun and that you care about!
Mike: I know. This has been the best year... (the crowd starts cheering so he starts yelling) THIS HAS BEEN THE BEST YEAR OF MY LIFE!
Mike: I FEEL THE SAME WAY!
Announcer: Knicks fans, please turn your attention to the big screen on the score board. Someone has a special question to ask. (on the screen there’s written ‘Julie, will you marry me?’ and goes on to show a guy kneeling down in front of a girl holding out a ring to her)
Phoebe: Oh, it’s the worst way to propose!
[Scene: Monica’s apartment. Joey enters the room]
Joey: Hey, finished my recommendation. (he hands it over to Chandler) Here. And I think you’ll be very, very happy. It’s the longest I ever spent on a computer without looking at porn.
Joey: (sounding very proud of himself) Some of the words are a little too sophisticated for ya?
Joey: Of course it does! It’s smart! I used the the-saurus!
Monica: Alright, what was this sentence originally? (shows the sentence to Joey)
[Scene: The corridor. Amy knocks Joey’s door and Rachel opens the door.]
(Joey comes out of Monica’s apartment and sees Rachel and Amy but does not notice the huge amount of bags)
Joey: Ah, look who’s back! (he sees the bags) Why do you have bags? RACH, WHY DOES SHE HAVE BAGS?
Amy: We’re gonna be roomies! (she snaps her finger and points at Joey, snaps her fingers again and points to the bags) Come on!
[Scene: Joey’s apartment. Rachel is in the living room and Joey comes out of his room.]
Joey: Oh, come on! Last night I was finishing off a pizza and she said (aping Amy badly) "Uoh oh oh, a moment on the lips, forever on the hips!" I don’t need that kind of talk in my house!
Rachel: No, it's just... look, you know, when I first moved to the city I was a lot like her! I was spoiled, self-centered and you guys really took care of me.
Rachel: Well, uhm... whatever, I have really appreciated it, 'cause I don’t think I would be the person that I am today if it wasn’t for you guys. See, I wanna help Amy the way you guys helped me. And I know it’s gonna take patience, but that’s ok.
Rachel: Amy, that’s what I was supposed to wear today, that’s why I hung it on the door.
[Scene: Monica’s Apartment. Rachel, Ross, Monica and Chandler are there, Phoebe enters the room]
Phoebe: Hi. I just had the worst anniversary ever.
Phoebe: We were at the game, and this guy proposed to his girlfriend on the big screen thing...
Phoebe: Yeah, I really do! Yes, but, after I dumped on the way he was gonna propose to me, I don’t think he’s ever gonna ask again! I mean, I said no in Barbados and now this!
Ross: Absolutely! You'll love the feeling! There's nothing like it!
Monica: How about at a game, on the big screen?
Amy: (To Rachel) Nana is on the phone (Hands the phone over to Rachel)
Rachel: (Takes the phone) Oh! That's interesting, since she died seven years ago!!
Rachel: (Into the phone) Hello? (announces to Amy) Oh, it's our nanny! (goes back to the phone conversation) Hi! Oh... God! I hope you feel better! Ok, bye! (Hangs up) (To Ross) That's Molly, she's sick. Can you watch Emma today?
Ross: (He interrupts her immediately, and drags her by her arm to the other side of the room) Well, can I talk to you for a sec.?
Ross: Fine, we'll call the next one Ella.
Rachel: (Shocked) Wha... the next one?
Rachel: Ross, I'm telling you, she's giving up getting her eyebrows (points at her own to emphasize the word) shaped to do this alright? Do you understand how important that is in our world?
Chandler: Hey Joe! How's the second draft of the letter coming?
Joey: Great, I'm finished! In fact, I just dropped it off at the agency.
Joey: No can do amigo. No, I didn't use the computer. Felt more personal to hand-write it. (Chandler and Monica look even more shocked)
Chandler: It's ok, it's ok. You know what? (Takes out his mobile) I'll just call the agency and tell them to throw out the letter. (starts dialing)
Chandler: (on the phone) Hello, this is Chandler Bing. Somebody just dropped off a handwritten recommendation letter, and.. (listens) Uh-huh... Uh-huh... okay... thank you. Good-bye. (hangs up looking very confused).
Monica: Ugh, we're screwed, aren't we? You know what? Just tell me on the way to the bird store.
Chandler: They thought it was very smart of us to have a child write the recommendation letter.
Rachel: Ugh. (takes the hat and covers Emma's head and half her face with it)
Ross: Hey Emma. Oh, why is she wearing her hat so low? She can barely see. (Wants to take the hat off, but Rachel tries to stop him).
Ross: (Back to Emma) Hi! (Looks at her) What... (Moves the stroller away from him so he can get a better look at her. He looks at her confused. Finally he realizes the difference and gasps). Please tell me those are clip-ons.
[Scene: Madison Square Garden. Phoebe and Mike are watching the game. There's cheering, but Phoebe seems distracted.]
Mike: Why do you keep looking at the screen?
Phoebe: I'm not. I'm praying. (looking up) Please let the Knicks win... Thank you Thor! (Mike is standing up) Where... where are you going?
Mike: Going go to the bathroom.
Phoebe: Well, if you don't... if you don't hold it in, you don't get all the nutrients.
Announcer: Knicks fans, please turn your attention to the big screen on the scoreboard. Someone has a special question to ask.
(We see the screen where it says: "Mike will you marry me?" and then we see Phoebe and Mike on the screen. Phoebe stands up and kneels in front of Mike.)
Announcer: Get a load of this... She's proposing to him. Guess we know who wears the pants in that family. (people are laughing, while Mike still seems bewildered)
[Scene: Rachel and Joey's. Joey is in the kitchen and the telephone rings.]
Joey: (picks up the phone) Hello? Yeah, this is Joey Tribbiani... Oh, hi! Well, I'm glad you liked my letter... No my mommy and daddy aren't home right now... (looks puzzled) Okay, bye bye. (hangs up) (to himself) She was nice!
Amy: You didn't want me to marry the old guy with the great apartment. Then, I tried to help your daughter to de-emphasize her flaws (frantically pointing at her nose) And suddenly I am the bad guy?
Amy: You know what? When I moved in here I thought: This is gonna be so great. Just us sisters, back together again like when we were kids, except without that stupid Jill... Oh! Who has gotten fat by the way...
Phoebe: That woman at the game didn't know what she was talking about. Mike, obviously you have balls.
Mike: But please, let's just forget the whole thing.
Phoebe: (the waiter puts a piece of cake on the table) I would love it. Consider it forgotten... But just so you know... however and whenever you decide to propose, I promise I'll say yes. Whether... whether, you know, it is in a basketball game, or in sky writing, or you know, like some lame guy in a cheesy movie who hides it in the cake.
(Mike's face changes from happy to sad, and he looks at the cake, disappointed.)
Phoebe: It's in the cake, isn't it?
Mike: (puts on a fake smile) Where else would lame Mr. No Balls hide it? (he takes the ring from the cake, and cleans it with a napkin)
Phoebe: What's the matter with me? How do I keep ruining this? I'm sorry, I'm sorry!
Mike: No! It's my fault. I keep trying to propose in these stupid ways and all I wanna do is tell you that I love you and I want to spend the rest of my life with you.
Mike: Phoebe, I love you. There's no-one else in the world I would ask to marry me... three times. But I wanna take care of you, have babies with you, and grow old with you... Phoebe Buffay, will you marry me?
(Mike puts the ring on her finger)
(They kiss again, and Phoebe looks at the ring.)
[Scene: The street in front of Central Perk. Rachel and Amy are walking on the sidewalk.]
Rachel: So how is the uhm... baby styling business going?
Amy: Oh! It's Ross... Hey Ross! (She says hey to the guy at the falafel stand, whose only similarity with Ross would be his black hair.) Hello-oo Ross! (to Rachel) He's rude!
THE END
The Interviewer: Like the candy?
MICH: I don't know if Monica told you but this is the first date I've gone on since my divorce so, if I seem a little nervous, I am.
Ross: Okay, so whats the matter?
Joey: (to the screen) Shoot! Shoot! Shoot! Shoot, or just fall down. That's good too.
Ross: The bathroom?
Mrs. Geller: Sweetheart. Oh sorry were late, my fault, I insisted on riding the tube.
Joey: Hey Ross. This probably isn't the best time to bring it up, but you have to throw a party for Monica.
Joey: What the hell!
Rachel: Right! (Heads for the bathroom.)
Joey: Interesting. all right I'll go out with her again and try to get past it (reaches for the chips) OH SALT BLOATY!
Ross: Oh dude, don't worry about it, I found an unattended maid's car. We're way ahead of the game.
Chandler: Oh, you don't want me on the trip?
Joey: (starts to imagine it) I cant. I keep seeing it the good way.
Ross: That's different, okay. That's like, uh 'Who dated a stripper?' or 'Who did it on the back of the Staton Island Ferry?'.
Phoebe: (to the students) Oh, Im sorry. Im so rude. Does anyone want to come to the movies?
[The next flashback is from The One With Ross's Sandwich, Ross his confronting his boss about him eating Ross's sandwich.]
Chandler: Oh good, 'cause I've already thought of 3... 4! I've just thought of a fourth (he goes towards the counter)
Ross: Uh sweetie, maybe youd be more comfortable here? (Gets up from the green armchair.)
[Scene: Unitel Video, Studio 55, Joey's telethon, he is being shown around by the stage director.]
Ross: Yeah, uh... and then I figured after you win, we could all go out to the balcony and see a night rainbow with gremlins dancing on top of it!
JADE: Oh, you know, the usual, teaching aerobics, partying way too much. Oh, and in case you were wondering, those are my legs on the new James Bond poster.
Chandler: Madre Sierra the of Treasure!
Ross: All right, the score is nine to eight in favor of the guys. Ladies if you miss this the game is theirs, pick your category.
Woman: (to her friend) He has the most amazing Porsche under there!
Ross: It was the chair again! Okay? Im not doing it! It whatlook, I dontyknow whateh-eh (He walks away and goes over to Mona.) Hi.
Phoebe: (reading from the note) Good-bye Phoebe and Ursula. Ill miss you. P.S. Your Mom lives in Montauk. You just wrote this!
[Scene: The Waiting Room, Phoebe is playing a song. Chandler, Monica, and Ross are there as well.]
Amy: no, no, then I would get the baby. I mean you know it would be just like a movie. Like at first I wouldn't know what to do with her, then I would rise to the occasion and and then I would get a makeover and then I'd get married.
Phoebe: Oh, its the compulsively neat one by the window, okay.
Joey: "Warden, in five minutes my pain will be over. But you'll have to live with the knowledge that you sent an honest man to die."
Elizabeth: The guys across the hall are throwing water balloons at us.
Chandler: It just keeps getting worse and worse! Y'know? I mean its bad enough that Im in love with my roommates girlfriendwhich by the way, I think she knows. Because every time were in the room together theres this weird like energy between us. And call me crazy, but I think she likes me too. And now I have seen her naked. I mean at least when Ive seen her with clothes on, I could imagine her body was like covered in boles or something. But there are no boles, shes smooth! Smooth! (leaves)
Chandler: Because then we would be the guys who turned off free porn.
Monica: Chandler theres nothing wrong with crying! I mean you dont have to be so macho all the time.
Monica: Shes in the bathroom.
[Scene: Central Perk, the gang is there, minus Ross. Chandler is trying to cheer Joey up about missing Phase Two.]
Frank Sr.: Oh! What about, what about the girls?
Phoebe: Oh, look look look. The last candle's about to burn out. 10, 9, 8, 7... (time lapse)... negative 46, negative 47, negative 48.... (someone blows it out, the room gets completely dark)
Rachel: She has the drugs!
Chandler: The whole thing! Can we go?
Ross: Monica, what is the matter with you?
Rachel: Ross, whats the big deal? So I kissed the guy!
MRS. GREENE: Oh, you kids [she caresses his face and chest] Well, this is the best party I've been to in years.
Amy coming out of the bathroom: Hey. Hey where's the baby?
Rachel: This bench, its hollow! I cant believe I never knew that! (She pushes all the pillows off it and opens it up) Oh, the presents!!!
Ross: The Armadillo was actually not so thrilled about that part! Okay Ben, its time to light the Hanukkah candles! (Santa, Superman, Monica, Ben, and the Holiday Armadillo go over to the menorah to light the candles.)
Joey: Okay. (he gets in the unit and closes the door) See?! I told ya!
Chandler: Look, don't you see what's happening here. Instead of hitting on her right away, he's becoming her confidant. Now he's gonna be the guy she goes too to complain about you.
The Salesman: So, heres somebody interesting, Joey. What do you know about Van Gogh?
Chandler: No. We were in the middle of sex and you fell asleep.
Phoebe: Is Rachel having the baby?
[Cut to the bathroom, Chandler is entering.]
Monica: No! No-no theyre not. Theyre still very angry! But yknow Chandler is also half-Swedish. You know what the Swedish people are famous for? Sitting down and being quiet.
Rachel: (deadpan) Yes, the hard part is truly over.
Elizabeth: Do you know where the store is?
Joey: Oh? Oh! Okay! Okay! Lets hear their plan! Now, whats the future look like for Dina and Bobby?
Ross: Ok. (browsing the apartment) Wow, you guys sure have a lot of books about bein' a lesbian.
[Scene: Ms. Geller, Rachel and Ross storm into the apartment.]
[Scene: Monica and Chandlers. Chandler is sitting on the couch staring at the tape on the coffee table with his eyes huge and his mouth wide open.]
Rachel: Now wait a minute thats not fair. He was married to me a hell of a lot longer than he was married to Emily, he just didnt tell me. (Everyone looks at her, Ross not happily.) Maybe I have to pee again. (Gets up to try to use the bathroom.)
[Scene: Chandlers office, the guys are there waiting to ambush the stripper.]
Ross: I will, I will. See, I'm waiting for the right moment. (Joey looks at him) What? What, now?
Phoebe: Hey! Ive got a great idea for party favors for the shower. Okay, we get some uh mahogany boxes and carve everyones names in them and inside is everyones individual birth stone.
Phoebe: (reading the slip of paper) Wow! (In a sultry voice) Hello, Mr. Chandler.
Ross: I can't believe we're gonna be the only people that aren't in this wedding.
[Cut back to the cast and Conan.]
Monica: Oh come on, its only fair, you paid for the flight. Now is, is that enough lire?
(Joey says nothing, but enters the room and kisses her. They are kissing passionately only to stop for a brief "oh" from Rachel. They continue their passionate kiss and Joey closes the door with his foot and it shuts in the camera's "face". And that's the end of the ninth season.)
Monica: Hey. (Sits down on the arm of the couch.)
Monica: Huh. So you're saying like umm, if there was an award for the best bad massage, well who would get that?
The Interviewer: We can go into detail
Joey: Or! You can just, yknow (He walks up close to whisper in Rosss ear and when he gets there he pushes Ross into the fridge.)
(With a final swing the door gives way.)
Ross: Wow! Sorry. So uh, how are the new people?
Nurse: The doctor will be here in a minute to do your sonogram.
The Cooking Teacher: (To Monica) Oh! Something smells good over at Monicas station! (She tries Monicas fettuccini.) Oh my God! This is absolutely amazing! Youve never made this before?
Rachel: Oh, no problem. You can borrow it, by the way. (Puts her hand in the pocket) Here are your keys, hon. (She takes the keys out, sets them on the counter, and notices she also grabbed a receipt.)
Carol: So, I got the results of the amnio today.
Mrs. Green: Now dont worry! Everythings gonna be okay. (Hugs Rachel while she is standing and Rachel is sitting, seeing this Monica decides to join in on the hugging by hugging Mrs. Green from behind her back.)
Ross: Well uh, yknow what? Even if she doesnt know anything, I do! I have a son. And his mother and I didnt live together, and whenever he was with me I took care of him all the time, by myself.
Phoebe: No, you cant let this stop you from getting massages! No look, I have, I have lots of clients that make the same noises you do!
(He throws down his plate and runs to the wine cellar, Monica is about to follow him but is intercepted by Rachel.)
Phoebe: Oh no, Bonnies the best!
Joey: (examining the tickets) Oh my God! Those are almost right on the floor!
Monica: Oh my God! Oh my God! (She frantically tries to clean up the bedroom as Richard starts the tour.)
Joey: Uh, Entertainment Tonight. [Cut to Chandler] Yeah, okay so, good talking to ya and don't come out here. All right. (Hangs up the phone and poses for that picture.)
Monica: Ross! The neighbors ate all my candy!!
Monica: Joey, what are you doing? You promised Phoebe you wouldnt eat meat until she has the babies!
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Chandler is seated, and the apartment is filled with baskets of fruit. Joey enters, check in hand.]
(The next couple enters.)
Joey: (staring at the ice sculpture) How bad do you want to stick your tongue on that? (They all glare at him)
Joey: (standing behind her) Uh, you gotta press the button. (Does so.)
Mr. Geller: I think I accidentally used Monicas boxes to keep the water away from the Porsche.
Ross: The nurse said theyre bringing in another woman.
Ross: (on tape) I know. Hey remember remember the night they got engaged? How uh, you and I almost
Rachel: Hey, hows hows the uh, miracle chair?
The Stripper: Ohhh, look at the little birdies! Are those yours?
Monica: (entering with Rachel) All right boys, last chance for the tickets!
Rachel: And Im Rachel, an admirer of the building.
Phoebe: Maybe because you never listen to anything that I say. I talk about her all the time! DENISE!!!!!