words in movies
Rachel: I don't wanna stand in the way of true love or anything, but I think a cantaloupe might hurt less.
Joey: Oh, ehm...I'm...I'm rehearsing my lines.They gave me a big romantic story on Days Of Our Lives. It's the first time my character's got one. I'm so nervous, you know, I really want it to be good!
Joey: Yeah, that was a disappointment...(pause) Oh, hey!D'you want to come down to the set and tell me if I'm doing ok?
Joey: Right!(he starts to ape her)"Oh my God, is this the men's room? Oh, I feel so foolish, have you always known you wanted to be an actor?" (he inclines his head as if to look at a man's private parts)
Monica: So, do you guys wanna come and eat dinner at the restaurant sometime in the next few weeks?
Monica: Well you can't! We're booked solid for the next month!
Phoebe: Well, it was an accident...You know, it's a lot of oil and sometimes the hand just slips!
Phoebe: Oh, good!Ok, good for you!Try to recapture the magic!
Monica: Oh, honey!I can't. I was just telling these guys that things are crazy at the restaurant!
Chandler: Oh, that's ok.I'll just try and reschedule. (on the phone) "Hi, this is Chandler Bing. I made a reservation there and I need to change it (pause) Oh, what do you mean it's not refundable? Can I just come some other time? (pause) Oh, can't you make an exception?"
Chandler: (on the phone) "Look, this is ridiculous! I'm not paying for that room! Ok?" (pause) "Oh, thank you very much!" (hangs up) Yeah, I'm going to Vermont...
Ross: Well, this is what happens when people live on the edge!
Ross: (browsing the brochure) I guess...It still seems a little...(enthusiastically) moonlight boat ride!!
Rachel: Hey Joey, is this the bed where Olivia lost her virginity?
Joey: I don't know, but one of the extras sure did! (pause) Hey, listen Rach. Thanks again for coming down to watch my scenes!
Rachel: Oh, please!Honey, just the fact that you want me here to support you, I'm...OH MY GOD!Is that Christian Sanders?He's so gorgeous!
Joey: Well, at the Christmas party him and Santa did some definitely gay stuff!
(the scene starts.Joey enters and there's a girl wearing a wedding dress near a bed)
Joey/Drake: Stopping you from marrying the wrong man and making the biggest mistake of your life.
Joey/Drake: I know what I felt that night when we kissed under the bridge.
(the actress slaps him)
Rachel: (watching a television where the scene is shown, startled) OH!
Joey/Drake: Can you really live the rest of your life never knowing what we could have been?
Joey/Drake: Yes, you do.Yes...you do. I'm the one who doesn't have a choice because I...because I can't stop loving you.
2nd Customer: It was. The duck in particular was superb.
Monica: Thank you!(she looks at the 3rd customer waiting for a compliment) You haven't said anything...
3rd Customer: The musician right outside the restaurant...it's kind of a mood-killer!
[Scene: Outside the restaurant]
Phoebe: Well, you said that you had customers lined up in the street, so I am here to entertain!
Phoebe: (with a fancy dress, still playing and singing): It wasn't just that she was fat, the woman smelled like garbage! Everyone! It wasn't just that she was fat the woman smelled like garbaaaaaage! (to Monica, showing her dress) Classy, uh?
[Scene: hall of the romantic inn in Vermont]
Receptionist: Welcome to the Chestnut Inn Mr. Bing, so where are you joining from?
Ross: (in a strange voice and eating candies) The big apple!
Chandler: I'm sorry, he's a little bit wound up, we had to stop at every maple candy stand on the way here.
Receptionist: I am sorry Mr. Bing, there's no record of your reservation in the computer.
Chandler: Let me get this straight. I called yesterday trying to cancel my reservation and I was told it was not refundable, then we drove six hours all the way up here and now you tell me that we don't have a reservation?
Chandler: Just give us the cheapest room you have.
Receptionist: Unfortunatly the only thing we have available is our deluxe suite, the rate is six hundred dollars.
Ross: Totally insane. Dude, let's drive home, we'll hit all the maple candy stores on the way back and if...if they're closed maybe we'll tap a tree and make some ourselves.
Ross: C'mon, you get the idea, ow-ow-ow we'll make our money back in no time!
Ross: I think it's the sugar, could you hold the apple?
Joey: Oh, you know, the writing was good, and the director is good, and... and my co-star's good but they're not as good as me!
Joey: Ow, I'm just going over the script now! You wanna read lines with me?
Joey: Right... (pause) ok, so just from the top of the page, right here.
Ross: (on the phone) Hi, this is Ross Geller in suite 206. It seems you forgot a couple of things. Could you have some complimentary toiletries sent up to my room? (pause) Thank you! Ok. Toothbrush, toothpaste, razor, mouthwash, deodorant, dental floss, band aids, shaving cream, after shave... and I feel like I am forgetting something... Is there anything else you have that I haven't asked for already? (pause) Yeah, go ahead, send up some tampons.
(Chandler enters the room)
Ross: Nice, put it with the others.
Ross: We are four short of a bush-o (pause). God I feel so alive, I love being in the country!
Chandler: I also got this great salt and pepper shaker from the restaurant.
Ross: No, Chandler, you have to find the line between stealing and taking what the hotel owes you. For example: hair drier, no, no, no, but shampoo and conditioners, yes, yes, yes. (pause) Now, the salt shaker is off-limits, but the salt (he opens the salt shaker and pours the salt into his hand) I wish I'd thought this through.
Chandler: I think I know what you mean though...the lamp is the hotel's, but the bulbs (goes to take the bulb)...oh, you already got that.
Chandler: Ok, how about this (picks up the remote control)?
Ross: No, no, no, you can't take the remote control!
Chandler: Yes, but the batteries...
[Scene: Central Perk. Monica and Rachel are sitting on the sofa]
Rachel: I don't know! I mean, maybe that's something to do with the fact that I saw him do a love scene yesterday.
Rachel: Ah! Well it was Joey reading Drake's lines in the dream...
Rachel: You took the same class twice.
Phoebe: Here, Monica, look what I got to wear when I play at the restaurant (she dons a top hat) uh, huh wait! (she raises a pair of spectacles to her eyes) Right? I mean, this might even class up the ballad of the uncircumcised man.
Phoebe: Right, yeah, ok, I'll ask the butler to fetch my diamonds out of the vault.
Monica: Phoebe, it's not what you wear. It's sort of your songs... I just don't think you should play at the restaurant anymore.
Phoebe: Oh, ok. Fine, I'll just, I'll take the hat back (she puts the hat in a bag and she crushes it angrily on the floor with her foot).
Rachel: Hey, so you guys, the funniest thing happened, at work...
Phoebe: Yeah well, "excuse me, I ordered the smoked salmon appetizer, but (peering through her spectacles) I can't see it, I can't see it"!
Monica: Ok, so that's what we're doing. You know, when I'm in the coffee house bopping along to one of your songs, I'm wearing ear plugs.
Monica: You know what? I take back what I said before. You keep playing at the restaurant, because with your music driving people inside, my bar sales are going up like crazy.
Phoebe: What are people having, the garlic Martini?
Receptionist: Here's your copy of the bill, we hope you enjoyed your stay.
(the receptions is puzzled. She goes in the back.)
Chandler: Oh, I didn't factor in the room tax.
Ross: Oh dude, don't worry about it, I found an unattended maid's car. We're way ahead of the game.
Ross: There's something new in the bowl.
Ross: No, but I want...I want the pinecones!
Ross: It's not the same.
(Ross starts stuffing pinecones in the suitcase. As the receptionist walks in, Chandler makes a bird's verse and Ross stops)
Ross: (to the receptionist) Thank you for a delightful stay.
(he picks up the suitcase, which falls open, revealing all the stuff they have taken from the hotel. The receptionist just looks at them.)
Phoebe: (singing) Food here at 'Javu'..will kill you..the food here at 'Javu' ...will kill you..
Monica: Thank god, it's just you! I thought someone was swinging a bag of cats against the wall.
Phoebe: You'd better get back in that kitchen Monica, the garlic is not gonna overuse itself.
Phoebe: Why? The only person my playing is bothering is you!
Phoebe: (while Monica drags her in the restaurant) Get your garlic-peelers off me!
Monica: (to the restuarant customers) Excuse me, excuse me, hi, I'm Monica Geller..I'm the head chef here.. (pauses as if waiting for something).. Ok, I was actually expecting a little applause there, but whatever! Ok, quick question: by a show of hands, how many of you were bothered by this woman's singing outside? (a few people raise their hands)
Phoebe: Ok, ok, how many of you enjoyed the music outside? (a few people raise their hands) Ha!
Monica: Alright, let me ask you this question: How many of you thought the music was fine, but not in keeping with the tone of the restaurant? (a few raise their hands again).
Phoebe: Ok, well, who identified the tone of this restaurant as pretentious comma garlicky?
Monica: Ok who thinks the food is delicious and a little pretention never hurt anyone? (a few raise their hands)
Phoebe: Ok, well, alright, who thinks the food is fine, the music was fine, but your evening was ruined by this incessant poll taking? (all raise their hands).
Phoebe: (smiling, raising her hand) Who's hoping the hand raising thing is still cute enough that you won't hate me?
Rachel: Joey, do you have peanut butter on the back of your head?
Joey: (Touches the back of his head and licks his fingers) Oh man! I thought I got it all!
Joey: And I couldn't find this little plastic thing (holds up plastic thing) that goes on top of the blender...and I thought...well... how important can that be, right...? Turns out very!
Joey: Well, I'm feeling really insecure about the one we are shooting tomorrow...
Joey: (looks at her for a moment) What the hell are you talking about??
Rachel: (shakes her head) Alright, alright look, just uh... just try to remember how you felt when you were in love, and think about that when you're playing the scene.
Joey: (excited) Thanks dude!!!This is GREAT!! (leaves Rachel very touched on the couch and goes into his room)
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's apartement, Monica is at the kitchen table writing something and Chandler enters kitchen area]
Chandler: I got you something from Vermont! (Sits down at the table)
Monica: (without looking up from what she's doing) Besides tampons and salt? (Then looks) Ooh! My God! Maple candy! That's so sweet of you. (Opens the box) That's weird...it's empty!
Ross: (sounds excited) Hi you guys! what's going on, you... you guys wanna hang out...or...? (Looks around the room nervously) do you...do you guys hear a buzzing?
Ross: Hey, hello! mmwa! (kisses Carol) I brought all the books, and Monica sends her love, along with this lasagna.
Charlie: I'm sorry, I have a really early class in the morning, but this has been lovely.
Monica: Oh, you're welcome for the party. I'm glad you're having a good time.
Gavin: Right. Right. Ross. So what's the deal with you guys? I don't want to get in the middle of anything
Phoebe: Okay. (The gang is giggles then Phoebe gets the bike out of the rack, gets on, pushes off, rolls a few feet, and falls over.) See?
Ross: (waving his fist in the air in triumph) YES, YES!
Joey: (to himself) And I ate the food, I had the fish, it was good, yeah. It was good, yeah...
Fake Monica: So once they caught on to the fact that we're, y'know, short and have breasts...
Monica: How was the pediatrician?
Joey: (entering) Look, what am I gonna do? I'm not flirting but still, I'm drawing her to me like - like a moth to a flame! (Tries to put his feet on the coffee table...they won't reach and looks around.) What the hell's going on over here?!?!? (Points to Chandler) Monica's gonna kill you! Look I need your help, I have to do something to-to repel this woman! Wait a minute, wait a minute, you guys repel women all the time.
Chandler: (answering the door) Hey!
PHOEBE: Uh huh, what is happening to the world? I mean, no no no, 'cause ET leaves, and and Rocky loses, Charlotte dies.
[Scene: Chandler and Joeys, they are admiring the entertainment center]
[Scene: Ross's Apartment, the guys are there assembling furniture.]
Announcer: Knicks fans, please turn your attention to the big screen on the scoreboard. Someone has a special question to ask.
[Scene: a NYU lecture hall, Rachel and Monica are arriving to talk to Ross after the lecture, but are there early.]
[Scene: outside Phoebe's apartment, Monica is knocking on the door.]
Ursula: Sure! Why not? You could be my sister for the day.
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Brenda is wiping the coffee table and Chandler is trying to look at her bra and leans over on the coffee table to get a good look.]
Phoebe: Oh my God, it's all so elegant! When's the dirty stuff starting?
Phoebe: Listen, Mike, if you were Swedish and you were saying the word "lorkins" what flowers would that be?
Rachel: Okay, well that�s now the third sign that I should not leave Emma.
[Cut back to the cast and Conan.]
Chandler: So, Ross and I are going to Disneyland and we stop at this restaurant for tacos. And when I say restaurant, I mean a guy, a hibachi, and the trunk of his car. So Ross has about 10 tacos. And anyway, were on Space Mountain and Ross starts to feel a little iffy.
Joey: I was with you the whole time we were in Connecticut, when did you even get those?
Theodore: How could you know. Why wouldn't you punch me in the stomach? (Theodore walks out... Mike walks towards Phoebe)
Monica: (yelling from the bedroom) Shut up, Joey!
Monica: Hi, come in! Paul, this is.. (They are all lined up next to the door.)... everybody, everybody, this is Paul.
Chandler: (holding a pair of furry handcuffs) What the hell is this?
(There's a knock on the door and Chandler gets up to answer it. He opens the door to reveal Monica with a turkey over her head.)
Joey: I called the sperm bank today, they haven't sold a single unit of Tribianni. Nobody wants my product. I mean, I-I-I don't get it (tries to drink the rest of the jam out of the jar and gets it all over his face, on his chin, nose, etc.) Maybe if they met me in person.
Ross: Yeah. (They go to the kitchen.)
Phoebe: That's okay Rachel. I'm not judging you; that's just who you are. Me. I'm more free y'know? I run like I did when I was a kid, cause that's the only way it's fun. Y'know, I mean didnt you ever run so fast you thought your legs were gonna fall off? Y'know, like when you were like running towards the swings or running away from Satan? (Rachel looks confused) The neighbor's dog.
RYAN: If I had one wish, it would be to build a time machine, go back to when I was 7, when Jimmy Hauser had the chicken pox. I would grab that kid and rub him all over my face.
Chandler: Yeah, come with us. You'll see how close it is to the city.
Chandler: Oh, so youre already doing your part for the kids.
Chandler: Why are you in here if Joshua is all the way over there? (Points to the living room.)
Chandler: Okay. (Youll have to see it, I cant describe the face he makes, but it isnt good.)
Woman Giving Birth: (yelling from the hallway) Its coming! Its coming!
Mr. Geller: No, the man is a mess.
Monica: (running over to stop Rachel) Hey Rach, the tampons here are only a penny. Lets stock up. (takes her into the bathroom)
Monica: No, no, no. Honey, I'm ok. Shake it off! (she shakes the wrist and it's more painful) Oh, no! No shaking, no shaking! Ooh! Ooh! (pause) Oh my God! I can't play!
Joey: Well, hey! Well... (he takes his mug to toast Phoebe) Here's to Phoebe, who's found the greatest guy in the world! To Phoebe and... (a bit uncertain) I wanna say Mike? (pause) To Phoebe and Mike!
Ross: Joey! The vet said its a simple procedure.
Rachel: The lights, please..
Ross: (Gasps and speaks at a higher pitch) This feels perfectly normal. Ok, get on the swing!
Girl: Im not gonna tell you! Youre the bad man who broke Sarahs leg.
Rachel: Look Ross, if youre so freaked out, just get in the car!
Joey: Ahhoy! That was the underwear I was wearing that night in London. Right Monica?
[Scene: The street, Joey is hanging out wearing his Porsche grab.]
Phoebe: What a beautiful night to be running around the street, looking for tickets. And the wind sure made it fun.
Joey: When was the last time someone told you just how beautiful you are?
[Joey just laughs as a third set of flashbacks featuring Chandlers mistakes starts. The first flashback is from The One With The Prom Video. It's Chandler telling Phoebe how much he hates the bracelet Joey bought him. They're both at Central Perk.]
Chandler: I dont care! (turns around and to the people watching them) I dont care!!
Monica: Oh my God, that place has the creamiest frosting! I use to hitchhike there when I was a kid.
Monica: Here, let me show you. Okay, the towels are hanging next to the sink, and umm, you can use the fancy soap.
Joey's Look-A-Like: Hey Mon! Hey Chann! (He goes to the fridge) Just gettin a soda! (Does so.)
Joey: Yeah. Okay. (Goes to take a bite out of the previously mentioned bagel.) Whoa! (Stops.) I almost forgot this was on your
Chandler: He's not right for the part. So if I suggest him, my bosses are gonna think I'm an idiot! And that's something they should learn on their own!
Monica: (running in from her bedroom) Ill get it! Ill get it! Ill get it! Ill get it! Ill get it! Ill get it! Ill get it! Ill get it! Ill get it! Ill get it! Ill get it! Ill get it! Ill get it! Ill get it! (opens the door) Hi, Tim.
Monica: What the hell is that dog doing here?! (She notices the dog sitting in the living room.)
Monica: Its the salts.
David: Uh no, I have to go in a few hours. I have to be on the red-eye. Well listen, yknow, next time youre in Minsk umm
Joey: No, God, no! No! No no, I'm an actor. You'd probably recognize me from a little show called "The Days of Our Lives".
Chandler: Nah-uh! I know you! Okay? I know the thoughts that you have in the head--in your head!
CHANDLER: I got the time to get to know Julie.
Phoebe: I dunno, well he got over the "We were on a break" thing really quickly.
Ross: Is that what they say on the Figure Skating Team?
Joey: Uh, (counts the money) wow, 700.
Ross: (recovers his composure and starts typing) Respectfully, professor R. Geller. (hits <return>, closes the laptop and joins Charlie on the sofa) Hey!
(She puts her leg up on the chair and removes this huge knife from her boot to open the box with. The guys are shocked at the knife's existence.)
Phoebe: Oh my God! No! Shoo! Kitty! No! No-no-no! Shoo! Come on, you! (goes over and picks up the cat) Come on. Crazy. (looks into the cats eyes) Oh my God.
(Joey gives him a thumbs up and heads for the chicken.)
Ross: Just one uh, one additional relationship thought. Probably something your already familiar with, uh, women talk! (smacks Chandler over the head with a magazine)
PHOEBE: Alright, I'm, I'm gonna go. I'm sorry about the dog, everything. I'm sorry.
Chandler: Angela's the screamer, Andrea has cats.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Ross is watching TV, but turns it off, and Rachel is sleeping on the couch. Ross puts a blanket over her.]
(The intercom buzzes.)
CHANDLER: (thinks, then turns to Monica) I climb down the fire escape and you can't put that in the closet?
Chandler: Because you (Points to Joey) broke a chair and you (Points to Rachel) broke a chair! The only one around here that hasnt broke a chair, is me!
Rachel: No! No! It's just that all the people in the entire world that I want to talk to are right here.
Emily: I still cant believe theyre tearing it down. It really is the most lovely building youll ever see. I mean its over (She stops suddenly, when she sees that demolition has already started.) Oh my God!
Phoebe: Yes, yes! Like the man in the shoe!
(They move into kiss but are interrupted by Joey knocking on the door.)
MONICA: This is for the scratchy twins out there. I taped oven mits to their hands.
The Cooking Teacher: Ah Monica, my star student.
Ross: (to Phoebe) Tell my son that I love him. (Emily returns with the water.) Excellent! Well, okay, I gotta have some more fun!
(They thread the needle and start poking him, he then stirs.)
[Scene: The train, its pulling into a station.]
MNCA: [getting the wine] Do not start without me. Do not start without me.
The Cooking Teacher: (tasting the cookie and with her mouthful) Oh, yum-yum-yum. (Hands the star back.)
Joey: Oh, hey, how about this one. Ah, its says so in the script! Y'know ah, I-I dont know why my character likes you either, I mean it says in the script here that youre a bitch.
Alan: (on the intercom) It's Alan.
Rachel: It's worse than the thumb!
Chandler: What 'not work out'? I'm seeing her again on Thursday. Didn't you listen to the story?
(Monica nods `Yes.' And they both walk to the couch looking all depressed.)
(They hug. And quickly that hug turns into a heated make out session, right there on the waiting room couch. Chandler, Rachel, and Monica quickly make their exits.)
Joey: Yeah and the most important thing is that it wont be some like, stranger up there who barely knows you. Itll be me! And I swear Ill do a really good job. Plus, yknow I love you guys and-and it would really mean a lot to me.
Chandler: Yeah, right here in my pocket. (Pats his pocket. Phoebe smiles, goes over to hug him, and removes the ring from his pocket.) Pheebs?
Steve: Yes, that's right. We're excited about the level of sophistication you'll be bringing to the job.