words in movies
David: Yeah. Well I-I got like thirty of them.
The Second Guest: We went to college with both of them and now we live next door.
Rachel: Oh, what are you going to do?! Are you gonna go run tell Monica?! Are you gonna tell Joey?! No! Because then you will have to tell them what we did! We are desert stealers! We are living outside the law!
Monica: Frannie was the one who found your Playboys and showed them to mom.
(Joey finishes climbing the stairs and sees them. Chandler and Rachel both stop and look up at him. Joey sits down on the step.)
Phoebe: Joey? How could you just let them leave?
Rachel: Oh, God, ask them what they want.
Ross: They don't like it when you keep asking them if they like you.
Monica: Chandler! (Joey and his grandmother shush them and wave them away, which they do.) Okay, let me get this straight, it's okay for you to flirt, but not for me.
(She finishes cutting them up and they all cheer.)
(Monica and Chandler's room. Phoebe, Monica and Chandler have their ears pressed against the wall, and Joey looks at them)
Rachel: Just think, in a couple of years we get to turn into them.
Monica: (entering from her bedroom carrying a present) Ok, these were unbelievably expensive, and I know he's gonna grow out of them in like, 20 minutes, but I couldn't resist. (There a little pair of Nike shoes.)
Chandler: (joining them) Okay, how'd it go at the doctor's?
(Chandler runs to check on them coming up the stairs.)
The Woman: Please! I have people coming from out of town today! And, I told them all about your candy!
Ross: Well I checked in the uh, lost and found, I talked to the manager, no-ones turned them.
Will: Could you also tell them Im skinny now?
Monica: Hand me those tomatoes, Im gonna show you what it should taste like! Come on, hand me them.
Monica: How'd you pay for them?
Aurora: ...Like, ...all of them?
(Monica does a fake laugh. For the laughs, you'll have to see the episode. I can't describe them.)
Ross: (showing them the page) Here, check it out. Its the first one, too.
Chandler: Well, I was cleaning out the closet and I found some pictures of them... being used.
Phoebe: No, yeah, we never find them! Shes always best at us that wily minx.
Joey's Doctor: Kidney stones! Now, ordinarily Mr. Tribbiani, we try to break up the stones up with shock waves, but they're to close to the bladder now. Which means we can either wait for you to pass them or else go up the urethra
Monica: (removes them) Thats because I-I was just grabbing some things out of the dryer, and its static cling. Or maybe its just that God knew Id be running into you and saw an opportunity.
Monica: I have been looking for them all week and she is wearing them!
Chandler: Yes, but you ended up having sex with both of them that afternoon.
Monica: No, no, no, I don't make chocolate pies. When I was younger I-I enter in this pie-eating contest. I ate so many that just the thought of them made me sick.
Ross: Oh, no! No-no! No, I tired! But I couldnt. Thats why Im here. Maybe we could attack them together? (He glares at him.) That-thats a no.
(The guy walks past them)
Monica: (coming back to the stage and sitting next to Chandler) Okay, Ive got some Ones, you wanna put them in her panties?
Rachel: Oh, I'm sorry. Oh, this is so stupid! I mean, I gave Barry up, right? I should be happy for them! I am, I'm happy for them.
Phoebe: And! And, theyre gonna have a baby! (The gang is shocked.) And! And, they want me to grow it for them in my uterus. (The gang is stunned into silence.)
Rachel: I’m telling you guys, we followed them out to a house in Westchester, the went in for like forty-five minutes and then they came out looking pretty happy!
Monica: How about, youre moving!! (Grabs a bunch of clothes and throws them into a box. What follows is a brief sequence of Rachel unpacking and Monica packing the same stuff over and over again as Rachel chants "No." and Monica chants "Yes.")
Phoebe: Well, 'cause then they'd be like my mom used to make them, you know, before she died.
Rachel: Phoebe you cant have both of them! You have to pick one!
Joey: You usually find them on the 'heaving beasts'.
Rachel: No, really. Really, Pheebs, youre not gonna be the one worrying about saving for college, or yelling at them when theyre bad, yknow, or deciding to put them on Ritalin when they just wont calm down. Yknow?
Phoebe: (waking and startling them) Oh! What what what! ...Hi.
Chandler: We used them as pillows when we went camping.
Monica: No, I just talked to them.
Monica: Joey, why dont you put them in the lost and found?
(A man carrying a box of bananas walks past them. They stare for a minute and then hobble after him)
Joey: (thinking) Uhm... oh! Okay. You come with me, and you tell them that the house is haunted!
Monica: Give them to me.
Monica: I like them a lot.
Sarah: (approaching with two filled balloons in her hands) Nobody! We put them in here! (Indicates the aforementioned balloons causing both of them to scream in delight and start drinking from the balloons.)
Ross: Oh hey, show them the picture of your uterus.
Chandler: No, wed just like to close them.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel is dusting. She comes to the table, lifts all the magazines and wipes under them, then just puts them down again. Monica bursts in, obviously drunk.]
Chandler: She doesnt know. Says she loves us both. Y'know I woke up this morning and I was in love, well I was happy. Y'know it serves me right for buying that twelve pack of condoms. And now I cant even return them, because she choked on the reciept!
Janice: I had them made special.
Ross: No, Im not gonna pick them up.
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's apartment. The scene starts where we took off in the last episode with Ross seeing Joey and Rachel kissing. Rosss tares at them.]
Rachel: (upset) Oh my Goood! Oh, do you think it's on all of them?
(They all laugh and Joey joins them, not to be left out. When the laughing dies down, he has a depressed look on his face.)
Monica: Well, because every time we do, you make jokes about swinging and scare them away.
Chandler: (shocked at the news) Why cant I tell them that we live together?
CAROL: And then Susan and I got in this big fight because I said maybe we should call off the wedding, and she said we weren't doing it for them, we were doing it for us, and if I couldn't see that, then maybe we should call off the wedding. I don't know what to do.
Chandler: (to Ross): I thought we had them!
Ross: Show them to me!
Monica: Yes, they are. The Blymens invited them.
Monica: Actually, I was gonna do them jullienne.
(The teacher comes up to them.)
Joey: (watches them for a while) Oh my.
Joey: Well Id be scared of them, but all right.
Ross: Yes it is. See. (Shows them the piece of paper she gave him with her name and phone number on it.)
(Monica and Chandler both remember a special moment between them.)
Chandler: Look Ross, if you don't know them by now, you will never know them, okay? That is the beauty of this game. It makes you want to kill yourself.
RACHEL: Both of them are here, both of them, both of them are here?
Phoebe: Thats right, there you go! Crushes happen all the time! I know Ive had them for all you guys. Well, except for Ross and Chandler. And Im sure youve had them for us.
(Monica and Phoebe get up and start celebrating in the kitchen, pouring wine and singing. Rachel, shocked, goes to join them.)
Monica: All right, all right. Maybe I can fit them in if I just do some rearranging. But uh, Rachel may actually have to sit at the bar!
Monica: Come on, we can't let them win!
Chandler: Yeah, listen, how cold is it going to be there? Do I need a coat or will all these sweater vests be enough? (Holds up 3 of them in different colors.)
Frank Jr.: Oh, I think you're right. Oh, wow. Phoebe, I don't think I can give one of them up. I mean, you know, they drive me crazy, but they're my babies.
Phoebe: Oh let me guess, and you wanna have them all at the same time and you wanna have them for your brother.
Rachel: Okay, you're coming with me, and I also told them that if we're still here when they get off that we'll go down to the cafeteria and have some Jell-O with them.
MONICA: Well, maybe you don't need them.
Phoebe: Yes, 'cause now I have to go down there, and deal with them.
(Ross starts to laugh, and then makes a face like 'Why did I just say that?' Ross' ex-wife, Carol, and her lesbian lover, Susan, enter the restaurant. Ross stares at them.)
Phoebe: Oh, hey, y'know what? Tell them that bone story.
[cut to Ross from his appartment, holding baby toys and is shocked to see them kissing]
Monica: This switch thing has been driving me crazy. So I turned it off and checked every outlet. Now, four of them dont work. Which means, one of them has to be controlled by the switch. So, I plugged in things in all four of the outlets that-that make noise, so that way, when I turn it on I just follow the noise and find out which one it is.
Monica: You have to help me! Im supposed to be writing my vows and all I have is this! (Shows them what shes been working on.)
Minister: Friends. Family. We are gathered to celebrate here today the joyous union of Ross and Emily. May the happiness we share with them today be with them always. Now Emily, repeat after me. I, Emily...
Phoebe: Okay thats even sadder. Look, I know, I know what I got myself into, its just that now that theyre in me its like, its like I know them yknow, I mean-I mean, its just not gonna be easy when these little babies have to go away.
Rachel: Yeah, I feel kinda bad for them, but Im also really psyched cause I dont have to move in here!
Steve: Like 'em? I could eat a hundred of them!
Joey: Oh-oh-oh, yeah! (He grabs some towels and takes them to him.) That's right, you take good care of those babies!
STEPHANIE: All of them.
Phoebe: No..umm, could I talk to one of them? Its very very important.
Phoebe: Alright, so, can we turn this off? Can we just make it... make them go away? Because I cant, I cant watch.
Rachel: Oh, I called them. And when they ask me what I saw, I can be very generous (Holds her hands far apart) or very (In a high pitched voice) stingy.
Ross: Wow! Thanks, you guys. Thats uhohhh, I wanna, I wanna play you another piece! Umm! Uh-oh! I left my uh, helicopter sounds on another disk. Ill be right back! Okay? (Runs to fetch them) This is so nice, ImI am so (starts to break up and leaves)
Ross: (looking at them) Wh-what's going on?
Rachel: Phoebe and I saw Chandler with a blonde woman today outside on the street and then we followed them to a house in Westchester.
Phoebe: No! No, the robots just work for them.
Monica: So Rach! Youre the first guest at Hotel Monica! Umm, youll just have to tell me how you like your eggs in the morning. And I thought I would bring them to you, yknow, in bed. Oh, you have been through so much.
[Rachel walks up behind them.]
Ross: (points the camcorder towards them to record their entrance) Hey!
[Cut to Elizabeth Hornswoggle's bathroom, Ross frantically pulls his shirt out and drops his pants. He exhales in sheer ecstasy as the coolness of the bathroom envelops his legs. He sits on the cast iron bathtub, again gasping in pleasure. He next grabs a magazine and starts to blow air on his exposed legs, but that doesn't work the way he wants it to. So he throws the magazine down, looks around for another idea, and finds one. He jumps up and hops to the sink. He turns on the water and starts to splash some on his legs, cooling them further.]