words in movies
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's apartment. They're still in their chairs watching TV. Chandler is ordering a pizza.]
DR. BURKE: But they're so dull, they're all opthamologists.
[Since they're alone they start kissing and Ross's hands work their way down until they're on Rachel's butt. Rachel starts laughing.]
DR. BURKE: Drops. Here, they're free.
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's apartment. They're still watching TV. Phoebe stands in front of the TV.]
ROSS: I've no idea, could be. Listen, I'm sorry I had to work tonight. RACHEL: Oh it's OK. You were worth the wait, and I don't just mean tonight. [they kiss] ROSS: You're not laughing. RACHEL: This time it's not so funny. [They kiss and start undressing. As Rachel tries to pull off Ross's tie she catches it in his mouth. Then they roll across the fur rug.] RACHEL: Ah, oh God. Oh, honey, oh that's OK. ROSS: What. Oh no, you just rolled over the juice box. RACHEL: Oh, thank God. [Scene: Museum of Natural History. The next morning Rachel and Ross are sleeping in the display under a fur.] ROSS: Hi. RACHEL: Hi you. I can't believe I'm waking up next to you. ROSS: I know it is pretty unbelievaaaaah. RACHEL: What? ROSS: We're not alone. [A church youth group is outside the display watching them] CLOSING CREDITS [Scene: Chandler and Joey's apartment. They are still in their chairs, watching Beavis and Butthead.] [they're laughing along with the show when an alarm goes off] JOEY: Is that the fire alarm? CHANDLER: Yeah. [feels the floor] Oh it's not warm yet, we still have time. JOEY: Cool.
Phoebe: Well, they may be a handful, but they're so cute.
Monica: 'Cause, Gary and Phoebe think they're a hotter couple than we are!
Rachel: Oh, they're real!
Monica: (to chandler) Twenty bucks says they're married within the month.
Joey: Yeah, they're great seats too!
Monica: Oh! They're late and they're sloppy!
Rachel: (shouting) Babies don't care if they're slim.
Phoebe: Uhm... well, they're not in the wedding.
Joey: They're ribbed for *your* pleasure.
Ross: Hey, what do you think they're doing in there?
Phoebe: Now, wait a minute. So, they're gonna name their first child Joey?
Ross: Wha...? Oh sure, now they lock it, but when they're having sex on the couch, its like: "Come on in, my butt is surprisingly hairy".
Steve: (from kitchen) Ah, cool! Taco shells! (Rachel motions, "You see!") You know, these are... they're like a little corn envelope.
Joey: Yeah, they're stuck inside the table!
Phoebe: We're so stupid! Do you know what's going on in there? They're trying to take Joey!
Joey: Oh! They're in the table!
RICHARD: Oh, no, honey, I mean, don't worry, I like hanging out with those guys. It's fun for me. They're different than my other friends, they don't start sentences with, 'You know who just died shoveling snow?'
CAROL: I mean, I knew they were having trouble with this whole thing, but they're my parents. They're supposed to give me away and everything.
Phoebe: Oh my God! May I just say that you two gentlemen have the exact same hands! They're identical! Now, I've never seen anything like that in the business world.
Rachel: They're my new 'I don't need a job, I don't need my parents, I've got great boots' boots!
Rachel: Yeah, you know what we should all do? We should play that game where everyone says one thing that they're thankful for.
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's Apartment, everyone except Chandler is there; they're opening their presents]
Phoebe: Maybe not! Y'know? Seriously, three babies are a handful maybe they're y'know, looking for a chance to unload one of them. Listen, I-I hate to miss an opportunity just because I didn't ask! Y'know?
Ross: It's I just know they're gonna be a couple of windbags wearing tweed jackets with suede elbow patches.
[as they're walking off, little bully grabs Chandlers hat from behind and puts it on himself]
(She opens the door to reveal Chandler and Ross. Unfortunately, they seem to have their holidays mixed up. They think it's Halloween and they're going as Crockett and Tubbs from that legendary TV show of the late 80's, Miami Vice. God, we looked silly back then!)
[Time Lapse, the gang is now watching Law & Order. By the way, the entire rest of the episode takes place in Monica and Rachel's apartment. Why are they called apartments when they're all stuck together? Something to think about.]
PHOEBE: I can see that, 'cause they both have those big brown eyes and, ya know, the little pouty chin. MONICA: And the fact that they're both monkeys.
Party Guests: (chanting) Howard! Howard! Howard! Howard! (Ross goes to investigate the noise) Howard! Howard! Howard! (They're holding Howard above their heads.) Howard! Howard! Howard! Howard! Howard! (He sees Phoebe chanting along with them.) Howard! Howard! Howard! Howard! Howard! Howard! Howard! Howard! Howard! Yay!!
Chandler: Maybe. Unless they're like two people who have lived in apartments next to each other for years, and then one day they're pushed through a vagina and they meet.
Ross: Yes, I do have a laundry room in my building, um, but there's a.... rat problem. Apparently they're attracted to the dryer sheets, and they're goin' in fine, but they're comin' out all.... fluffy. Anyway, say, sevenish?
Phoebe: Well, you know what, they're our responsibility now.
Monica: And, and, and they wear those little water wings, you know. And they're, they're running around on the deck. Then Hoyt wraps this big towel around all three of them.
Ross: I don't know, you don't wanna mess with corn nuts. They're craaazy.
Paula: Listen. As someone who's seen more than her fair share of bad beef, I'll tell you: that is not such a terrible thing. I mean, they're your friends, they're just looking out after you.
Joey: Yeah, yeah, they must have jumped off the table, 'cause now they're gone!
JOEY: Ok, let's start with the cons, 'cause they're more fun. All right, Rachel first.
Phoebe: Just pretend they're not even here! It's OK Monica, when that spotlight hits you it so bright you won't see anyoneanyway.
Ross: Totally insane. Dude, let's drive home, we'll hit all the maple candy stores on the way back and if...if they're closed maybe we'll tap a tree and make some ourselves.
Dr. Mitchell: Willya relax? Look around. No pagan altars, no piles of bones in the corners, they're fine. (Baring his teeth to clean them with his finger) Go like this. (Dr. Rosen obeys.)
Ross: Then I'm happy too. (They're still hugging - fade out)
Rachel: Allright. Well thank you so much for coming... (they're standing up and make their way to the door)
Monica: They're in the kitchen getting something to eat. Can you believe how nice they are?
Ross: (panting)They're towing a car. And I am seeing...spots.
Rachel: They're in a caaar...
Joey: They're so small! (Both he and Ross look at them with satisfied looks on their faces.)
Chandler: Yeah but they're right. I mean, I'm not a strong father figure and I never will be.
Rachel: They're waiting for me, Ross. I can't do this right now, I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
PHOEBE: I'm sorry, but sometimes they need help. That's fine. Go ahead and scoff. You know, there're a lot of things that I don't believe in, but that doesn't mean they're not true.
Monica: I mean, why should I let them meet him? I mean, I bring a guy home, and within five minutes they're all over him. I mean, they're like- coyotes, picking off the weak members of the herd.
[Scene: Central Perk. They're all sitting there as usual, except Joey. Gunther is serving a nearby table.]
[Scene: Caesar's Palace Casino, Chandler is looking for Monica while Tom Jones's signature song is playing in the background (Getting the theme yet? Tom Jones, Wayne Newton, casinos They're in Vegas people! Catch up!) It's Not Unusual, y'know, "It's not unusual to be loved by anyone! It's not unusual to have fun with anyone! But when I see you hanging about with anyone, it's not unusual to see me cry! I wanna die." Well, while that's playing he spots Monica playing craps and in victory hug the guy next to her. Chandler turns and walks out.]
Chandler: We just finished this magnificent Thanksgiving dinner. I have--and I remember this part vividly--a mouthful of pumpkin pie, and this is the moment my parents choose to tell me they're getting divorced.
Monica: Chandler! Everyone--no one's eating my Tuscan finger food 'cause they're all filling up on Phoebe's snow cones!
Chandler: What if they're not? What if it's adopted by a king?
Ross: They're still, they're still not coming on man and the lotion and the powder have made a paste!
JOEY: They're ribbed for your pleasure. [Ross and Monica trade their gifts.]
They're tiny and chubby and so sweet to touch, and soon they'll grow up and resent you so much. Now they're yelling at you and you don't know why, you cry and you cry and you cry. And you cry and you cry and you cry...
Dr. Franzblau: Ice chips, just ice chips. They're at the nurses' station.
Ross: Well, because y'know there are certain rules about this kind of stuff. You don't uh, you don't fool around with your uh, friend's ex-girlfriends or possible girlfriends or girls they're related to.
Gary: Yeah well, being that he was the victim, they're usually pretty talkative.
(He searches to his right; she searches to her left. They're both on their hands and knees when they spot the die. It's propped up against the table leg, and it's not lying flat. Both the four and the five are showing.)
Ross: (reading from a notepad) I mean, we've been accepting Leakey's dates as a given, but if they're off by even a hundred thousand years or so then you can - you can just throw most of our assumptions, you know, right in the trash. (he throws the notepad in the waste bin) So-so what I am saying is - is is that (he picks the notepad back from the waste bin) is that the repercussions could be huge! I mean, not just in palaeontology, but if-if you think about it, in evolutionary biology, uh, genetics, geology, uh, I mean, truly the mind boggles!
<Rachel and Amy 'fighting'.. They're really just trying to slap each other and just keep slapping their hands>
Phoebe: Well y'know every time that they say that like they're doing laundry we'll just give them a bunch of laundry to do.
<Ross and Rachel are putting baby stuff together like they're going to be going somewhere.>
[The next flashback is from The One Where Eddie Moves In. It's the sequence where Joey and Chandler are both saddened that they're not living together anymore. All By Myself is playing in the background.]
Rachel: Well guys tend to get naked before they're gonna have sex.
Chandler: No, no, no... They're really yours. We... found them in your old room.
Phoebe: God, they thought they can mess with us! They're trying to mess with us?! They don't know that we know they know we know! (Joey just shakes his head.) Joey, you can't say anything!
Joey: Too long! Oh my God, Rach, I've been dying to talk to someone about this for so long! Listen, listen, we can't say anything about this to anybody, they're so weird about that! Listen (Phoebe returns and interrupts them.)
Joey: They're brother and sister!!!
Joey: Yeah! But that is not what they're looking for. (time's finished) OOOH!
Rachel: Well, you know I'm not surprised. I mean have you seen them together, they're really cute.
Joey: Nothing major, it's just that, you know, they're not really good enough for you, and you deserve the best.
Chandler: I don't believe they're brother and sister.
Chandler: Alright! That is it. This is our apartment and you can not behave this way. Now if you can't act your age then you shouldn't be here at all. Now those plates may not be as nice as the pretty pink ones I picked out, but they're very important to Monica. I want you to apologize to her right now.
[Scene: Ross and Rachel's apartment. They're interviewing Sandy.]
Phoebe: That's weird. (Pause.) I bet they're doing it.
Phoebe: Ok. Do we have to talk like that then they're not around? (She sees Rachel) Oh, no, no! Listen, is there someone who can fill in for me?
Joey: Oh, you know, the writing was good, and the director is good, and... and my co-star's good but they're not as good as me!
Phoebe: No, you can't go there! You know how I feel about these "big massage places"! They're putting people like me out of business!
Rachel: No. But don't worry, I'm sure they're still there.
Joey: (realizing) Oh, that's what she meant! (pause) You know, if they're gonna shorten it, they should call it the MUSE! You know, short for museum, and avoid all the confusion!
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's apartment. They're done and come out of their bedroom. Emma is still gone.]
Monica: What if something gets broken, they're so expensive.
Rachel: No, honey, they're not, but don't worry, because we are going to find them, and until we do, we are all here for you, ok?
Chandler: He said...he said, he said that they're having a great time. I'm sorry. But, the silver lining, if you wanna see it, is that he made the decision all by himself! Without any outside help whatsoever.
Chandler: Oh yeah, they're totally gonna back down!
Rachel: Uhm... you haven't told these guys what they're doing in the wedding yet.
(They all cross they're arms like the Power Rangers do)
Joey: Come on, they're close.
Joey's Doctor: Kidney stones! Now, ordinarily Mr. Tribbiani, we try to break up the stones up with shock waves, but they're to close to the bladder now. Which means we can either wait for you to pass them or else go up the urethra
ROSS: Well, well, they're good.� It's been a while since I've seen you like this.� You, you clean up good.
Ross: No, they're not.
Monica: Thank you. They're yours.
Ross: No, no, it's okay. Really. They're plenty of people who just see their sisters at Thanksgiving and just see their college roommates at reunions and just see Joey at Burger King. So is, is that better?
Ross: This is fun. Hey Rach, remember that whole "We were on a break thing?" Well, I'm sorry, will you marry me? (Laughs--whines as he sees that no one is laughing. They're just staring at him in shock.)
Phoebe: Yeah, and you have nothing to worry about 'cos they're all crap!
[Time lapse, they're both entering.]