words in movies
Ross: I know, and I can't stop sweating. (he walks towards Missy)
Roy: All right, somebody show me where to plug in my box, and we'll get this party started! (he thrusts his pelvis towards Phoebe) Whaaaa... (walks back to plug in his cd player) Here? All right.
Roy: Ok, ok, ladies! Can I have your attention, please? (pause) Did someone call for the long arm of the law? (He extends his arm from around his crotch and then upward and outward, towards Phoebe) I should warn you, I have a concealed weapon! (Puts his hands over his crotch) I hope you're familiar with the States penal code, ok, ok, enough teasing. Now for some pleasing!
(he uses his remote to turn on the music, "Tainted Love" by Soft Cell, and starts dancing for Phoebe. He shakes his butt, moves his shoulders back, grabs his crotch and hops towards Phoebe. Phoebe is half horrified and half scared. He takes his hat off and throws it away, does some "Can Can" high kicks and swings his butt in front of Phoebe who looks at it in disgust. Then he tears open his shirt and shows her his chest and she flinches.)
Monica: (walks towards Phoebe and the stripper) Uh, look, officer... uhm Sir...
[Scene: Class of '91 reunion. Ross is walking angrily towards Chandler, who is talking to two other guys.]
Rachel: Well lets see. Maybe he knows where Ross is. (They walk towards Chandler) Hey, how's it going (tries to look as un-interested in him as possible - checking out her nails).
Chandler: Well, I did and it hurt. (they walk towards the bar) That's when I wrote the song: "Betrayal In The Common Room".
Rachel: (blushing) Oh, what a line. (walks towards the drinks table with her back towards Chandler and whispers "Oh my God!")
(they sit down and Roy plays "You Make Me Feel" by Sylvester on his boom box, and starts... With his back towards the girls, he starts waving his hands, then backs towards the girls slapping his butt, then swings it around, and makes thrusting pelvic movements in front of Phoebe. He dances around the tables in between all the girls, and gets back into the kitchen part of the room. He then tears off one of his sleeves and throws it towards Monica and Rachel, who fight over who gets it. He then tears off his other sleeve and moves it back and forth between his legs, getting closer to Phoebe.)
Phoebe: And... moment's over! (Rachel, Joey and Chandler all turn and look disapprovingly towards Monica but she just shrugs it off) So, ok, uh, I can forget that. I can forget that and uhm... (she's flipping cards skipping half of them) Oh this is funny! Oh, but you need to know that to... that, to... Oh, ok, well, uhm, I (Monica is miming CUT). Ok, ok, I, ok, I.... MONICA I CAN'T DO IT LIKE THIS! THIS IS MY WEDDING! OKAY, I DON'T WANT THIS (she mimes Monica's when she was twirling her hands) OR THIS (she taps her watch) OR THIS (she mimes CUT) OK? I JUST WANTED A SIMPLE WEDDING! WHERE MY FIANCEE CAN GO TO THE BATHROOM ANYTIME HE WANTS! (pause) You know what? You're done.
<Monica and Amy turn away and walk into the living room towards the secret closet>
Rachel: Oh... that's too bad. Bye bye. (she walks away towards the door)
(Joey walks in and moves towards Ross, who's sitting of the sofa)
Ross: But it absolutely didnt. (Yelling towards the bathroom) It didnt!! It didnt!!
(The chain breaks loose from the wall, and because Joey was pushing with all his might, he propells into the kitchen, towards the table with all the food. This table has wheels underneath it, and when Joey falls on this table, he rides into the living room, with all the food falling off, until finally Joey also falls off... Joey gets up quickly, a bit agitated, and acting as nothing happened. He is covered in food stains.)
Ross: Actually, it looks really good. (Turns towards the window and now Phoebe starts jumping to divert his attention.)
Chandler: You wanna see flirting? I'll show you flirting. (Starts to move towards Ross.)
[Scene: The roof, Joey is walking towards Ross with a guy]
Phoebe: Let's run towards them!
(Ross goes towards Charlie, who's conversing with a fellow paleontologist, and touches her shoulder to get her attention)
Ross: Okay, okay, I was typing names into the library computer earlier, yknow-yknow for fun, and I typed mine in and guess what came up? My doctoral dissertation! Its here! Yeah, its right-its right down here! In the biggest library in the university! (They start heading that way, towards a secluded section behind the racks.)
Chandler: Fine. (Joey and Chandler walk towards the door)
Phoebe: That's okay Rachel. I'm not judging you; that's just who you are. Me. I'm more free y'know? I run like I did when I was a kid, cause that's the only way it's fun. Y'know, I mean didnt you ever run so fast you thought your legs were gonna fall off? Y'know, like when you were like running towards the swings or running away from Satan? (Rachel looks confused) The neighbor's dog.
(Joey leaves and closes the door behind him. Chandler walks towards the living room, but then Joey enters again.)
[Scene: The Hallway, Chandler is running up the stairs and towards his apartment, but Joey is taking out the garbage at the same time and stops him in the hall.]
Chandler: Yes! (Rachel walks towards door) You're never gonna make it!
Chandler: Well, either that or uh (Motions towards Joeys door.)
Ross: Oh, (he goes towards Mike in order to shake hands but Mike hugs him) hey, oh... I... I was-I was going for a hand shake.
Monica: Ohh come on, I love this song! Come on, youll be fine. (She starts to walk towards the floor.)
Chandler: (goes towards Joey) You know that's not the reason Joe. (Joey hugs him and after, he takes something from the fridge and puts it in his mouth. He goes back to where he was standing before)
Joey: Got it! (Goes towards the front door and stands with his back to it) Hey hey hey! (to Chandler) Where do you think you're going?
[Joey is looking at Rachel, smiling, and gesturing his head towards Ross.]
Phoebe: All right, that makes sense. (Starts towards the door.) Ugh. ButScrew you Im going first! (She grabs her purse and runs out.)
(Joey gives him the okay symbol, and Ross rushes towards him to be stopped by Chandler. Meanwhile, Phoebe goes over to the snack table as some guy, which turns out to be Ursula's fianc�e Eric, walks in and smacks her butt.)
(Joey enters through the side window and jogs towards the kitchen holding a baseball bat)
Monica: Wouldnt you love to do it just once?! (Raises her hand towards Chandler.)
Minister: (Looking and feeling awkward. he looks towards Emily.) Uhh...Shall I go on?
[All look towards door Fun Bobby left through.]
(Phoebe and Joey run back out and head towards the street.)
Chandler: (laughs) Well, don�t believe everything you hear, Ken. (both turning away to files) But yeah, that�s true. Alright, let�s get started, by take a look at last quarter�s figures. (The female next to Chandler starts smoking, towards her:) Ah, Claudia, aren�t you supposed to blow smoke up the bosses� ass?
Ross: Hello. (He throws his jacket towards the coat rack and misses.) Im sorry Im a little late. Ah(Checks his watch)Whoa! A lot late. Let me start by uh, by introducing myself, I am Professor Geller. (The bell rings.) So to sum up, Im Professor Geller. Good job today.
Ross: Mon, look who I ran into! (Gestures towards Rachel.)
Ross: (turning towards him) Yes Mr. Lewis, how can I help you?
Rachel: (Comes in the front door and walks towards the kitchen.) Hi.
Monica: (Scoots towards the side of the bed.) Could you not look?
JOEY: Yeah. Uh, oh, OH, the best part, c'mon. [leads them to the bathroom, gestures towards toilet, everyone stares, uncomprehending] Heh?
Monica: We left Joey alone with the food! (Walks towards the window and looks out) Yep! Yep, I knew it! There he is... feeding stuffing to a dog!
Joey: Its all London, baby! Here we go. (He takes a picture of a less than enthused Chandler and starts towards the girls apartment.)
Ross: Ah-ha, nowhere to run! (He starts to run towards them.)
Emily: Well, that me. (They kiss again.) Here, have this. (She gives him the candy bar.) Im only allowed one piece of carryon anyway. (She starts towards the jetway.)
(They look up towards the vent and wave at Phoebe.)
Phoebe: Oh my God!! (She grabs Rachels hand and drags her towards Monica.) Excuse me! Excuse me! (Shes knocking women and veils out of the way as she moves.)
Joey: (walking towards her to hold her and support her) Monica, you understand what we are saying, right?
Joey: No, no! (they all go towards the balcony but they get jammed in the window)
(They walk passed each other, Ross towards the door, Chandler towards the counter, suddenly they turn around to face each other)
Ross: Id bet Id still be doing my kara-tay. (Thats karate, hes just saying it that way.) Towards the end of our marriage I was doing a lot of kara-tay as a way of releasing the tension from yknow, not doing anything else physical.
Joey: Chandler... hey... (he goes towards his room but he stops near Emma's cot) Rach... what's Hugsy doin' in the crib with Emma? (he looks puzzled)
Ross: (points the camcorder towards them to record their entrance) Hey!
Ross: What? Oh yeah. (He moves next to her head.) Im sorry. I mean I-I think I went a little crazy. I mean I was thinking about myself when I (Wanders towards Rachels feet) reallyI should have been thinking about you Rach
Rachel: Yeah. So don't move, okay? Just stay here and... (nods towards Ross) maybe close your blinds at night.
{Transcribers note: This is where the opening credits are, but theyre not the usual opening credits. Oh no! These credits are based on the world that would have been created had all of the above actually happened. It starts out with all of them at the fountain sitting on the couch as Fat Monica runs up and sits on the arm of the couch, tilting the whole thing towards her. It then goes on to show Rachels still a shop-aholic and with Barry. Fat Monica is sweating while cooking and dancing while eating a donut. Phoebe as the Wall Street shark smoking while on two cell phones. Then theyre dancing in the fountain. Joey entering as Dr. Drake Remoray and meeting a groupie. Chandler trying to write as a bird does its business on his shoulder and falling asleep while typing. Ross doing some kara-tay and trying to get Carol into bed. And finally, some more dancing in the fountain, them all flexing, and the turning out the lamp and shutting off all the lights bit from the first season. Just remember one thing, this is an alternate universe. Everything from every other episode doesnt apply, for instance, Ross and Rachel have no history. And in fact have not seen each other in years in this world.}
Chandler: (smiling, surprised) Oh yeah? (looks towards the kitchen, worried) Listen, don't tell Monica, she'll rip your heart right out.
Joey: Yeah, I-I-I'm down with that. (He turns back to the woman.) Okay, here goes. (Thinks.) How (Holds up his hand like an Indian) you (Points at her) a-doin'? (Does a little twisting motion with both hands and ends up pointing at her, he then winks. She smiles and waves again.) (To Monica) It worked! She's waving me over. (Towards the woman.) Okay, I-I-I'll be right over. Let's see, she's on the third floor
Rachel: Oh! Believe you me! I am going to bring this cake back, I don't even want it in my home... (Turns towards the cake and sees Joey trying to take a piece and yells at him) Joey, don't touch it!!
Joey: Is this because I come over here without knocking and eat your food? (Walks towards the fridge) Because I can stop doing that, (looks at the fridge) I really, really think I can!
<Amy runs towards Rachel and Rachel puts her arm out, hand on Amy's head and Amy starts trying to hit her but is missing, Rachel is moving backwards towards the table when her hand swipes the one plate left on the table on to the floor>
Joey: I know, there are gonna be some pasty folks by the pool tomorrow! (A woman goes towards them)
Ross: Okay, Joey, you know what? You have to go for it. How often does this happen to you, huh? You owe it to yourself. (Walks towards the door until )
Joey: Well, we got plenty of space! There-there's still some over there (Points to where the window is but sees that there isn't any space there and points towards his door.) by-by that speaker. Please, just stay!
[Rachel walks past Joey towards the couch]
Joey: Oh yeah, sure. (She gets up, walks towards the bathroom, and Joey watches her go.) Ehhh.
Rachel: (she goes towards the others and she's very excited) Guys, you're not gonna believe this! I was just saying goodnight to Emma and she said her first words!!
Chandler: (gesturing towards another table) What about the birds?
Theodore: How could you know. Why wouldn't you punch me in the stomach? (Theodore walks out... Mike walks towards Phoebe)
Rachel: Oh! Get over it soldier, we've gotta do this! (She pulls him towards her and throws him onto the barcalounger) Ok. Aha! You like that huh?
[Scene: Moving Shot towards The Waltham House. A phone is ringing.]
Chandler: Oh good, 'cause I've already thought of 3... 4! I've just thought of a fourth (he goes towards the counter)
(She pulls Joey towards her and dances really close to him.)
Emily: Oh. Oh. (She starts running towards the building.)
Minister: (Looking and feeling awkward. he looks towards Emily.) Uhh...Shall I go on?
[Scene: The Hallway Outside Rosss Apartment, Ross is walking towards his apartment and sees Rachel sitting in front of the door.]
Ross: Actually, it looks really good. (Turns towards the window and now Phoebe starts jumping to divert his attention.)
Phoebe: Oh no! He's not getting away that easy! (Phoebe and Joey run towards the bathroom and enter)
Monica: Okay. (She does so and starts to walk towards Joey to receive her pancakes.)
CHANDLER: Ok, good night. [walks towards his room] You big freak of nature.
Monica starts crying: Thank you. It was so beautiful. <gets up and walks towards the front door> I'm going to go to Joeys and get the pies.
(They move towards a platform, dancing really strangely as they go)
Laura: (embarrassed towards Chandler and Monica) Well, I'm pretty sure I gave you my number.
(Joey spots them and walks towards them)
Mr. Waltham: Well theres one (pointing towards Jack) and theres another (pointing towards Judy).
Ross: Anyway seriously, uh just just talk to the guy, okay? And tell me how it goes. (walks towards the door until )
(At that moment two very large men start screaming and running towards Emily and picking her up.)
Ross: Anytime anything comes close to touching her eye or anyone else's she like freaks out. Watch! Watch! (He takes his finger and moves it towards his eye.)
Rachel: (walking towards Joey) Joey, it would mean so...
(They run to the living room where Monica has moved the chair back (Towards the step), the coffee table forward (Towards the TV), and taped a square outline on the floor.)
(They start moving towards the bedroom, never taking their eyes off each other. They move past Ross and stop.)
Joey: (approaches, wearing his glasses) Hey you guys, check it out. Check it out. (Moves his hand towards and away from his face.) It's like it's coming right at me. (Chandler helps out a little bit by pushing on Joey's arm, which causes his hand to slap him in his face.)
Chandler: Shhhh! Shhhhh! Shhhhh! Shhhhh! (Walks backwards towards the door) I cant, I cant hear you. (He runs out)
Phoebe: (Walks towards Ross) If you hadn't just had a baby with my best friend I swear to Lucifer a raber dog would be feasting on your danglers RIGHT NOW!
Joey: That's it! I'm tired of covering for you two! This has got to stop! (Realizes he still has the underwear in his hand.) Ahh! (Throws them towards Chandler's room.) And tighty-whiteys! What are you, 8?
Chandler: What?! Im Chandler! (She nods towards the doorway, Chandler turns and looks) Oh, thats Richard!
Mike's dad: (leans in towards Mike) I crushed a pill and put it in her drink... (to his wife) Come on, sweetheart.
(Ross enters and he's really angry. He goes towards Chandler who's sitting at the counter)
(Hits the ball towards Chandler who returns it back to him. He then hits the ball at Monica who slams it and it bounces off Kara's leg.)
Joey: (realizes what he said) Street noise drowned any of that out? (Rachel moves madly towards him) No, all right, I see you later, okay... (Turns away embarrassed)
Phoebe: (hearing the signal) Im coming! Im coming! (She takes off towards the signal and almost knocks another woman over.)
(While they are both pushing the painting towards each other, Phoebe enters)
[Cut to Monica and Chandler's, Ross is eating breakfast with Joey and Monica. Joey is walking towards Ross.]
Chandler: (To the nurse at the nurses' station) My specimen is in the room and I just want to thank whoever knocked on the door while I was in there. Really helped speed the process along! (walks towards the common area and sees Janice is still there) Janice! You're not... gone?