words in movies
Joey: Ooh, I was gonna say bologna, but thats much better. How about a little of that smoked turkey?
Monica: (laughs) This is Chandlers chicken. This is the turkey. (Sets down a huge turkey.)
Monica: Okay. (Opens the fridge.) All right, turkey. Eh, that wont work. Cheese? (Picks it up) That wont work. Olive loaf? (Picks it up) I hope that wont work.
Monica: Hey, did you get the turkey bastedOh my God! Oh my God! (She sees someone is stuck in the turkey.) Who is that?
Joey: (Holding a turkey leg) Theres gravy?
Chandler: You got it. (Starts looking at the pad, while Ross got the turkey out of the fridge and starts to unwrap and it) You got Nevada twice.
[Time Lapse, dinner has ended for everyone except Joey who looks like to have finished the turkey, until he turns the plate around and reveals he only ate one side.]
(There's a knock on the door and Chandler gets up to answer it. He opens the door to reveal Monica with a turkey over her head.)
Phoebe: No, no, it's not your fault. You know it's partly my fault, 'cause I made you quit cold turkey. Sorry, no. Okay, well, I mean, I can't date you anymore, 'cause your, you know (in a high pitched voice) Wow! But um, but I will definitely, definitely help you get over my sister. Okay, stalk me for a while. Huh? Yeah, and, and, and, I'll be like an Ursula patch.
Monica: Anyway, it just doesnt seem worth it to make a whole turkey for just three people. Okay? Its a lot of work.
Phoebe: Okay, lesson one: chords. Now, I don't know the actual names of the chords but umm, I-I-I made up names for the way my hand looks while I'm doing them. (She starts to show Joey the chords. Transcribers Note: For this one you'll have to use your imagination, 'cause it would take me 50 pages to describe each one. So if you want to see them, you'll have to wait for this episode to come to a TV near you.) (Holding up her hand and then reconfiguring her hand with each name.) So then, this is Bear Claw. Okay, umm, Turkey Leg and Old Lady. (Joey tries to imitate them.)
Monica: That's all the turkey you're gonna get.
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Will has left and the rest of the gang is watching Joey finish the turkey.]
Chandler: (entering) Aww, turkey! Aww, giving thanks! Aww!
Ross: Just a sandwich. Turkey, a little mustard
[Cut to Chandler opening the door to his and Joeys apartment to reveal Monica standing there with a turkey on her head in The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks.]
Joey: Oh! It all looks so beautiful: the turkey, the stuffing...
Phoebe: Ugly Naked Guy's taking his turkey out of the oven. Oh my god. He's not alone. Ugly Naked Guy's having Thanksgiving dinner with Ugly Naked Gal.
Monica: Forty-two to twenty-one! Like the turkey, Ross is done!
(They hear Monica trying to unlock the door. So Phoebe quickly pushes his head down onto the table to make it look like the turkey is just sitting on a platter and not stuck on Joey's head.)
[Scene: Monica and Chandlers, Phoebe enters with a paper turkey.]
Chandler: I'm serious, let me do something, just not the turkey or the stuffing, nothing "high profile".
The Housekeeper: More turkey Mr. Chandler? (And he makes eyes at him.)
Monica: Ok, let's see... uhm, okay, the turkey is in the oven, the stuffing is ready...
Joey: Oh yes I do. Otherwise whats next? Today Im just a guy who cant finish a turkey, but tomorrow Im the guy who eats half a Powerbar, wraps up the rest, and puts in the fridge? No! No, I just I justI gotta change my pants. (Gets up and heads for the door.) Jeans have no give. (Exits.)
Rachel: You guys, come on, it doesn't matter why we're late. We're all here now, please let us in so we can have some of your delicious turkey. (A slice of turkey on a piece of aluminum foil is slid under door)
Chandler: (joining them) Hey! Which ones my turkey burger?
(They hear Monica trying to unlock the door. So Phoebe quickly pushes his head down onto the table to make it look like the turkey is just sitting on a platter and not stuck on Joey's head.)
Ross: Yeah. You see my-my sister makes these amazing turkey sandwiches. Her secret is, she puts a, an extra slice of gravy soaked bread in the middle; I call it the Moist Maker. Anyway, I-I put my sandwich in the fridge over here
Rachel: What?! Joey got a turkey stuck on his head?!
(They get into position to pull the turkey off.)
Rachel: Oh no, I'm good, I don't wanna get that turkey smell all over my hands.
Rachel: What? (Joey starts offering Ross some turkey.) Oh yknow what? Can we please keep the chicken and the turkey and everything on the other side of the table? The smell is just yuck!
Ross: (hands Chandler his pad and walks in) I want my turkey now!
Chandler: Bad London! (Takes a spoon and smacks the turkey.)
Phoebe: Oh, I believe it. I think the baby can totally hear everything. I can show you. Look, this will seem a little weird, but you put your head inside this turkey, and then we'll all talk, and you'll hear everything we say.
Monica: Hey, did you get the turkey bast-Oh my God! Oh my God! (She sees someone is stuck in the turkey.) Who is that?
Chandler: Really? Worse than, "More turkey Mr. Chandler?"
Monica: All right everybody, this turkey is ready!
Monica: Wait, wait, wait! (She puts a Shriner's hat on the turkey.)
Monica: All right, youre telling me you can eat an entire turkey in just one sitting?
Joey: Look. (He walks out of the bathroom with his head stuck in a huge turkey.)
Monica: Hey, what are you doing? You gotta save room, youve got almost an entire turkey to eat.
Joey: But my mom always makes them. It's like a tradition. You get a little piece of turkey on your fork, a little cranberry sauce, and a tot! It's bad enough I can't be with my family because of my disease.
Monica: Wait, wait, wait! (She puts a Shriner's hat on the turkey.)
JOEY: I can't believe it's Christmas already. Ya know, I mean, one day your eatin' turkey, the next thing ya know, your lords are a-leapin' and you geese are a-layin'.
Monica: All right okay, just so you know, Im not gonna make a turkey this year.
Monica: Well Phoebe doesnt eat turkey
Joey: (entering, wearing the maternity pants from earlier) All right wheres that turkey!
Phoebe: Turkeys are beautiful, intelligent animals!
Joey: No there wont! I promise I will finish that turkey!
Chandler: Thanks, its ah, Gaelic, for Thy turkeys done. So ah, Im gonna go, nice, nice meeting you.
Monica: Well, I don't care! That-that turkey has to feed 20 people at my parent's house and they're not gonna eat it off your head!
<Monica holds a turkey leg up in the air over the plate trying to cut meat off with a knife>
Ross: (getting upset) Oh-oh really? Did you confuse it with your own turkey sandwich with a Moist Maker?
Joey: Don't you put words in people's mouths, you put turkey in people's mouths!
Joey: (he has a turkey on his head) It's stuck!!!
Chandler: Uhm, we've got turkey grease.
(Chandler gives Monica a footlong "eye dropper" with the turkey grease in it)
(They all start thinking. Joey starts rubbing his chin, of course his chin is currently inside the turkey so he ends up rubbing the turkey. And I didn't do that joke one bit of justice. It's one of those you have to see it to get it jokes.)
(Monica sets something on the table and removes the cover. It kinda looks like turkey.)
Monica: Ok, right about now the turkey should be crispy on the outside, juicy on the inside. Why are we standing here?
Phoebe: Oh no, I know! I know! It's the one where Joey got Monica's turkey stuck on his head!
Rachel: Well, Im gonna take a nap, turkey makes me sleepy.
Monica: If you have the big apartment you have to deal with people coming over all the time. That fridge has got to be stocked, okay, thats your department now. (She takes back the turkey leg)
Joey: But you gotta have turkey on Thanksgiving! I mean, Thanksgiving with no turkey is like-like Fourth of July with no apple pie! Or Friday with no two pizzas!