words in movies
Joey: All right, all right, all right, all right, all right, you really wanna know how I did it, Ill show ya. When you handed me back the card, what you didnt see was, I looked at it so fast that it was invisible to the naked eye. (picks up a card and quickly looks at it) I just did it. (does it again) I just did it, again. Here, Ill slow it down so that you guys can see it. (looks and the card in slow motion)
Monica: Honey, whats the matter?
Chandler: Oh, y'know what, Im gonna be okay, you dont have to throw a party for me.
Mr. Kaplan: Ill bet your thinking, Whats an intelligent girl who wants to be in fashion, doing making coffee? Eh?
Ross: What, so this guy is helping you for no apparent reason?
Rachel: What!?
Cookie: Hey. What are we drinkin over here.
Sister 1: (to Chandler) What cha doing?
Monica: Oh, he is. And he is so dreamy. I mean, y'know what, when he left I actually used the phrase, Hummina-hummina-hummina. (walks away)
Phoebe: Why, what happened?
Monica: What is the worse part?
Ross: (to Rachel) You see what men do! Dont tell me men are not nice! (points to Chandler) This is men!!
Rachel: Oh yeah, whats it about?
Ross: Dear Mary-Angela. Hi. Hows it going. This is the hardest letter Ive ever had to write. (to Chandler) What the hells a matter with you? How do you think Joeys going to react when he finds out that you blew off his sister with a letter?
Chandler: What if Mary-Angela comes to the door and I ask for Mary-Angela?
Joey: Waiting for my Grandma to finish my laundry. What about you?
Ross: (to Rachel, as she gets his number) What, he gave you his home number? As in like, to, to his home?
Ross: Thats right good things, that-that is what I said. (glances at Monica)
Rachel: I got to figure out what Im going to wear.
Ross: You go get em. (to Monica) What did I do to you? Did I hurt you in some way?
Monica: What?
Ross: Why dont you call him?! Well, thank you very much! Y'know now he is going to prep her, y'know prep her, as in what you do when you surgically remove the boyfriend!
Monica: What?! Ross y'know this isnt even about you! I mean this is about Rachel and something wonderful happening for her. I mean you know even if youre right, what if he wants to sleep with her, does it mean he gets too?
Chandler: So um, Mary-Angela, whats your second favorite?
Joey: Whats goin on?
Joey: What?! How could you do that, how could you think she was Mary-Angela?
Chandler: Y'know what, we should all calm down because your brothers not going to punch me. (to Joey) Are ya?
Joey: Well, that is usually what I would do. But I just never thought youd be on the receiving end of it. How could you do this?!
Cookie: So what. I say, punch him.
Chandler: What?! (Cookie punches him)
Rachel: What are you doing here?
(We hear the guys start to attack him, but the guy manages to calm them down and gets them to agree to what he did. Monica throws up her hands in disgust.)
Rachel: (shocked) What?
Monica: (To Phoebe) This is great! Now shes gonna be mad at Rachel! Yknow what? And Im just gonna swoop in there and be like the daughter she never had.
Gunther: What if you put them here. (sets the empty tray on another stack of empty trays on the back counter.)
Monica: We're supposed to uh, be spending a romantic weekend together, it-it, what is the matter with you?
(Both women gulp in air. Ross looks at his "football," then manipulates the head & limbs back into place, until it resembles what it represents.)
Chandler: Well, y'know two regulars. And ah one that barely qualifies as... (starts to kiss her again, but she gets up.) Ahh, what?
Cecilia: Right. Hes not angry at the room either. Try it again, he owns it! He owns the room. It is his. He owns, owns, owns, owns the room! He owns it!! (Joey gets a snooty look on his face.) All right, its a little weird, but its getting better. (Joey is pleased.) Oh well, Im gonna miss this woman so much. I dont know what Im going to do! I mean, its been 20 years of my life.
PHOEBE: Well, come on, who cares what that guy thinks. What does Warren Beatty know about kissing (Chandler and Monica, give her a look that says 'think about it') Ooh.
Phoebe: All right so Earl, lets just forget about the people at the office, okay? There-theres gotta be someone else in your life worth sticking around for! What about-what about your family, your friends, or maybe your girlfriend?
PHOEBE: What if the husband person is the wrong guy, and you are the right guy. I mean you don't get chances like this all the time, if you don't meet her now, you're gonna be kicking yourself when your 80, which is hard to do, and that's how you break a hip.
Tommy: Hot coffee!!! You idiot!! You were gonna spill hot coffee all over me, huh?!! What are you just some big, dumb, stupid, doofy idiot, with a doofy idiot hairdo, huh?! Huh?!
Joey: Name? (Ross looks at him.) I know Ross but whats it short for? You know like, like Rossel or Rosstepher.
Aurora: So what do you want?
Chandler: Okay, look I need your help, I dont know what to get her for Valentines Day.
Rachel: No-no, seriously-seriously, what was the especially me part about?
Phoebe: Yeesh, whatd you do about it?
PHOEBE: You know what, that's it, that's it. [She rips off the mits, Ryan follows her lead.]
(He hear a duck start quacking, and see it waddle into the living room from the bathroom. Joey wants to know whats with the duck.)
Joey: Hey, what is with the secrecy Phoebe? Huh? And what about this Denise, is she cute?
Joey: Hey little buddy, how are you feeling? (The duck does not get sick and Joey recoils in horror and heads for the couch.) What the hell is in that face cream? (Hes about to try out the couch but notices the bed in Rachels room. He walks into her room and feels the bed.) Thats so soft. (He pulls back the comforter.) Pillowcases! (He climbs in and groans in delight. Suddenly, he feels something under him and pulls out a little beat up paperback book. He opens it and starts to read from it.) (In his head.) Zelda looked at the chimney sweep. Her father, the vicar (Stops reading and thinks.) The vicar? (Continues reading) wouldnt be home for hours. Her loins were burning. She threw caution to the wind and reached out and grabbed his (Out loud.) Whoa! (Reads on in silence.) Whoa-ho-ho-ho! This is a dirty book! (Continues to read.)
Joey: What are you doing? I said seven! (Holds up six fingers.) (Realizes his mistake) Argh!!!
Ross: S-s-smell her hair? What if I did?
Ross: So tell me something. What does the phrase 'no date pact' mean to you?
Rachel: (holds a pair of panties in front of Ross) Ok, Well, what about these are white cotton panties. Would they go with whites or delicates?
Rachel: Hey, what do you think is a better excuse for why Im not drinking on this date tonight. "Umm, Im a recovering alcoholic. Im a Mormon," or "I got so hammered last night Im still a little drunk?"
Chandler: Youre not, what do you, what do you got a bionic foot?
Joey: (he stops Chandler from posting the message) No, no, no... what do... you can't do that to him!
JOEY: Well, what about the fact that you insulted the bracelet and you made fun of me?
Chandler: Yeah, I'm putting my foot down. Yeah look, when I proposed I told you that I would do anything to make you happy, and if having the perfect wedding makes you happy, then, then that's what we're gonna do.
Phoebe Sr.: Well, any how, some how I got pregnant, and, and I was scared. I was stupid and sellfish, and I was 18 years old. I mean, you remember what its like to be eighteen years old?
ROSS: [puts the message in the cupboard] I don't know, I don't get, I don't get it, I mean, wh, wh, two months ago Rachel and I were like, this close. Right now, what, I'm takin messages from guys she, she meets at the movies? I mean this, this Casey should be takin' down my messages, ya know, or, or, Rachel and I should be together and, and we should get some kind of me, message service.
Rachel: (entering) Okay, stop what youre doing, I need envelope stuffers, I need stamp lickers.....
[Scene: Joey's apartment, Joey and Ross in the living room, rehearsing what Joey will say to Charlie in the Museum]
Joey: Yeah? I just figured yknow, after living with you itd be an interesting change of pace to have a female roommate, yknow? Someone I can learn from, someone-someone whos different than me. And whats more different than me; a guy whos not 19 than say a girl who is 19? Enh? (Points to his head.) Not just a hat rack my friend!
David: (disappointed) Oh. Uh, what?
Phoebe: What am I gonna do?! What am I gonna do?! I cant call my office theyll kill me! I cant call my clients theyll kill themselves! Great, now my chest hearts.
Chandler: Oh, yknow what, that might be okay even if it was just kind of a fling, that might be all right with Rachel.
Chandler: Okay, let me just jump in and ask, at what point did you think this was a successful marriage?
Rachel: Hey, yknow what? Im not waiting! Im gonna push this baby out! Im doing it! I mean its what? Three centimeters? Thats gotta be like this! (Holds her hands a couple inches apart.)
Phoebe: Ooh! I know what you could make! (runs over to join Monica and Rachel in the kitchen) I know! Oh, you should definitely make that thing... you know, with the stuff? (Monica doesn't know.) You know, that thing... with the stuff...? OK, I don't know. (sits down)
Rachel: What? What? Hes interested in you. He-he likes your hair, he just wants to know how you got here.
Mr. Waltham: You want a piece of me, sir? Is that what your saying? (Pointing at Jack and poking him) You want a piece of me?
Cecilia: Yknow what? It doesnt matter! Because it is not true!
CAROLINE: You know, my brother and his boyfriend have been trying to adopt for three years. What agency did you two go through?
Joey: I was tryin to make a sale!! Oh, man, if I ever run into that guy again, do you know what Im gonna do?
Ross: Man, look at all those stars! (Yeah, you can see what? Five of them from the city?) Infinite space. It really, really makes you wonder, doesnt it?
Ross: What? You do? You do? (Looks) Oh my God!
Rachel: Honey, its going to be okay. Hes been incredibly supportive of me, and if he gets a little upset; thats what the meatball sub is for. (She gives Dina a sandwich wrapped in aluminum foil.)
Helena: Im not very fond of New York. Queens I like. (Noticing Monicas ring.) Ooh, what is this sparkle something! (Shows the audience who woos.) Honey! Huh?
Joey: What are you talking about? Lots of things rhyme with Rachel. Bagel. Mail. Jail. Bail. Able. May-pole.
Rachel: (laughing) What are you saying?
Monica: What are you talking about?! 007 has all those gadgets!
Phoebe (watching the food on the table): Wow, this is quite a spread! (pause) What is all this stuff?
JOEY: Huh? Never really thought about the writers. The scripts just kinda come to my house. But you know what? This makes me look good, which makes the show look good, which makes the writers look good so how could they be mad about that?
Phoebe: Bing, what an unusual name.
Phoebe: Yeah, and what a great way to say, "I secretly love you, roommate's girlfriend!"
Joey: Wh? Monday, one day. Tuesday, two day. Wednesday, when huh what? Thurs(He gasps in horror.) Oh! (Runs out and Chandler just shakes his head. After a second Joey runs back in to grab a piece of pizza and runs back out.)
Ross: All right, I see what you guys are saying. I'll uh, I'll go downstairs and fill out an application.
Ross: What, we-uh- we don't have shoes here, or...?
(All of a sudden, Marcel grabs Ross's finger with his whole fist, and he squeezes it, so tight, that Ross finally knows what it is to be a father. He looks up at his friends, who smile encouragingly, Rachel tenderly resting her chin upon Monica's shoulder. Ross realises that Chandler was right and he's gonna make a great dad!)
Chandler: No, there are great pictures of you standing next to a guy whos going like this (Makes what can only be described as a toothy frown. Henceforth, this shall be known as The Face.)
Amy: Well, it should be. I'm gonna help babies learn how to accessorize, what colors to wear, what clothes are slimming...
Chandler: What do you think shes just gonna sit there quietly? You dont think shes gonna want to make a toast? You dont think shes gonna want to grab the microphone and sing Part-time Lover?!
Monica: Ok, so that's what we're doing. You know, when I'm in the coffee house bopping along to one of your songs, I'm wearing ear plugs.
Rachel: Okay. (After Paul leaves Rachel drops to the floor to confront Ross.) What?! What are you doing here?!
Ross: (Into receiver) Hello? (listens) Oh no! What happened? (listens some more) Ok ok, where are you? (Grabs a pen and starts writing). Ok, I'll be right there. (Puts the phone down)
MRS GREEN: So, what do you think of my daughter in the apron with the big job?
Monica: Wait a minute. What about that summer during college that you lived with grandma, and you tried to make it as a dancer?
Supervisor: Okay, what was wrong with that call?
ROSS: You ever figure out what that thing's for?
Ross: Oh, what were the other two?
Joey: Now he's movin'? Man, what is Emily doing to him? (Phoebe pinches him again.) Ow!! He's not even here!!!
MONICA: Joey, you know, maybe your just not used to kissing men, maybe you just tensed up a little, maybe that's what you need to work on.
Phoebe: Okay. So, this wire is connected to this wire which plugs into here. (She points at each as she says it.) Okay so, to get the beeping to stop all I have to do (She picks up a shoe and proceeds to pummel the smoke detector. She then gets up and heads to bed, stops, quickly turns around, and is satisfied that the beeping has stopped.) Well done, Pheebs. (She resumes her trek to bed, but is stopped at the entrance to the hallway by the now steady and extremely loud tone emanating from the smoke detector.) (Yelling.) What do you want from me?!!!!!!!
Phoebe: Ooh, I cant do this. My mom was right. If I cant-if I cant give him up, then theres no way I can give up a baby. Ohh, God, Frank and Alice are gonna be so crushed. What-what else, what else can I give ema kidney!
Phoebe: Sven I don't understand what you're saying! What is wrong with the flowers? Lorkins? What the hell are lorkins?
Rachel: Arghh!! (She quickly hangs up the phone and starts to pace around wondering what to do.)
Phoebe: A-ha! And... what is bluffing? Is it not another word for... lying?
Joey: Yeah. We figured when we couldnt find you, youd gone home to make up with Rachel. Which is probably what you shoulda done. Huh?
Phoebe: Okay. Okay, let's say I bought a really great pair of shoes. Do you know what I'd hear, with every step I took? 'Not-mine. Not-mine. Not-mine.' And even if I was happy, okay, and, and skipping- 'Not-not-mine, not-not-mine, not-not-mine, not-not-mine'...
ROSS: Hey, tell me again, what do I do when Mr. Roper calls?
Ross: Huh... huh... what a loser! Some more wine? (takes the half-full glasses and goes to the counter)
Rachel: Well, yknow what though you guys? I really appreciate that but I think Im just gonna take Sebastian to the charity.
Monica: (Doesn't believe what she's hearing) Was your cabin pressurised?
(They all reflect briefly on what was said.)
ROSS: I don't know what to do. What am I gonna do? I mean, this, this is like a complete nightmare.
Ross: (enters) Wow, couples who live together do start to look alike. So, Mondler...uh, what uh, what cha doin?
Ross: Well, aren't you forgetin' something? What, what, what is uh, what is that guy's name? Dad!
Monica: What? what? He obviously thinks that's a nice way to be proposed to, plus he'd never suspect it!
Joey: Hey, that woman's got an ass like Carol's! (They turn to stare at him.) What? Thought we were trying to find stuff.
Phoebe: Okay! (Runs that way and hears another whistle blast.) Hey! (Heads the other way and hears another blast.) What do I do?!! (She runs in the second direction and finds that the whistling is coming from inside a rack. She moves the dresses out of the way to find Rachel curled up in a fetal position frantically blowing on the whistle.) What are you doing? (Rachel doesnt stop.) Did you find the dress? (Rachel wont stop so Phoebe pinches her nose shut which causes her to spit the whistle out.)
Joey/Drake: I know what I felt that night when we kissed under the bridge.
Rachel: So, what, youre just, youre just okay with being flaky?
Phoebe: (standing up) Okay, so umm, somebody has to call Frank and Alice. (As she is talking Joey is sticking the camera under her skirt.) And then my mom wants to know-(notices Joey)-Joey, what are you doing?!
Chandler: Well, you know what they say, elephants never forget. (Monica is not amused by that statement.) Seriously, good luck marrying me.
Rachel: Excuse me! (and she walks back to Joey, who is still looking very impressed about what Ross said to him. Rachel looks at him and hits him.) You didn't tell him, did you?
JOEY: What are you . ..� (He sees her in her negligee.)� Why are you dressed like that?
Ross: You what? Wh what were you doing seeing her boobies?
Ross: (reading from a notepad) I mean, we've been accepting Leakey's dates as a given, but if they're off by even a hundred thousand years or so then you can - you can just throw most of our assumptions, you know, right in the trash. (he throws the notepad in the waste bin) So-so what I am saying is - is is that (he picks the notepad back from the waste bin) is that the repercussions could be huge! I mean, not just in palaeontology, but if-if you think about it, in evolutionary biology, uh, genetics, geology, uh, I mean, truly the mind boggles!
Phoebe: It was really sweet. The last thing she said to me was; "Okay dear, you go get the eggs and I'm gonna get the yogurt and we'll meet at the checkout counter." And y'know what? We will meet at the checkout counter.