words in movies
Phoebe: (laughs harder) You make it so funny.
Joey: (going over and picking up the rod) Thats all right. Hey you guys, you know whats going to be great about the fishing trip this year? When my dad gets me out in the middle of the lake and gives me that, "Joey, what are you doing with your life?" stuff. I can say, "Well, Im doing a movie with Charlton Heston dad. What are you doing with your life?"
Chandler: You dont have to stop having fun just because Im here. Kathy didnt cheat on all of you. (To Joey) Well, except you. (They hug and Chandler goes into the bathroom with the chick and duck following him.)
Monica: Hey, Joey, I dont think that you should leave Chandler alone. I mean its only been two days since he broke up with Kathy. Maybe you can go fishing next week?
Chandler: (opening the bathroom door and kicking out the chick and duck) Would you give me one minute!! Please.
Joshua: So, these will match the jacket you picked out for me last week?
Joshua: (turning around) Oh! You know what I need?
Rachel: Oh, okay. Uhh, well lets see. (Grabs his hand.) Youre aboutwell uh, this one is large. And this one(Grabs the other hand.)
Mr. Waltham: I-I was wondering, my niece you see is in from Londonwell Shropshire really but yknowwell shes about your age I say. Anyway I have tickets for the opera, Die Fledermaus, and I was wondering if youd like to keep her company this evening?
Rachel: Sure. You got it. Great!
Mr. Waltham: Ohh! Yes of course, thank you, thank you, thank you so very much.
Joshua: But, I was curious; do you have any plans for tonight?
Joshua: I invested in this night-club and its opening tonight, would you like to come?
Joshua: Youre into hardcore S&M right?
Joshua: Kidding! (Rachel is relived) Im gonna get there early, but Im going to put you on the V.I.P list, okay? Look for me.
Rachel: Yeah, great, you betcha!
Mr. Waltham: For you and Emily, tonight, Die Fledermaus.
Mr. Waltham: I think youll like it, it has two out of the three tenors.
Chandler: Yknow, I cant believe Kathy did this too me. I really, thought that she was the one. I tell you what, from now on Im never getting out of this chair, ever! Okay? From now on, this chair is the one! You wanna what else is the one? My sweat pants!
Joey: Oh my God, you guys have no idea.
Monica: You stink!
Ross: Are you kidding?!
Rachel: Ohh, its Joshua invited me to this fancy club opening tonight. But, I already told Mr. Waltham that I would take his niece to this dumb old opera. So What are you gonna do?
Rachel: Ohh, gosh. You guys, come on, this isI have to meet Joshua! This is my one chance for him to see the fun Rachel. Yknow the "Wouldnt it be great if she was my wife" Rachel. Ohh, all right! Are Joey and Chandler back?
Monica: No, Chandlers still in Phase One, and Joeys that thing you smell.
Ross: You want me to take some girl Ive never met to the opera so you can go to a club and flirt with some guy, hmm, that-that is a toughie.
Monica: (looking out the peephole) Ohh, shes looking down the hall. Oh! She looked right at me! Oh wait, you cant see people through that little hole, can you? (Goes back to the door.) Hello!
Rachel: Oh thank you! Thank you, thank you, thank you! (Monica opens the door.) Emily?
Emily: Oh, no-no-no, thats not rude! Its perfectly in keeping with a trip that Ive already been run down by one of your wiener carts, and been strip-searched at John F. Kennedy Airport, apparently to you people, I look like someone whos got a balloon full of cocaine stuffed up their bum.
Monica: I-I-I think you look great.
Emily: Good night, it was very nice to meet you all. (Storms out.)
Phoebe: Dont you just love the way they talk?!
Monica: Oh wait, Joey, you cant go like that! You stink!
Phoebe: Ohh! So, did you get to meet her?
Monica: So you hit her in the face?
Rachel: Honey, thats youre name.
Monica: Hey! Youre wearing pants!
Ross: When we first met her, she was soaking, her feet were wet! Who wouldnt be miserable? Im telling you when I got her into a dry pair of shoes, she was a totally different person.
Monica: Why do you care so much anyway?
Rachel: I dont care! All right, yknow what Im just upset that Im getting nowhere with Joshua thatyknow what still, you do not meet someone and go flitting off to Vermont!
Monica: Well, when you first met Barry, you flitted off to Vail.
Rachel: Oh, yknow, would you just for once, not remember every little thing!! (Storms out.)
Monica: What are you doing?! Chandler! You cant just go back a phase!
Chandler: Yes you can. Youre thinking about time, you cant go back in time.
Phoebe: Well, look, why dont you just, why dont you do your Phase Two strip club thing with us.
Chandler: (laughs) No you cant.
Chandler: You dont want to be guys, youd be all hairy and wouldnt live as long. (Starts to go to his bedroom)
Phoebe: Yknow you, you just stop being such a wuss and get those off and you come with us and watch naked girls dance around!!
The A.D: You.
Joey: Yknow, I can see why you think that, but ah, actually, you know who I think it is?
The A.D: You?
Monica: (coming back to the stage and sitting next to Chandler) Okay, Ive got some Ones, you wanna put them in her panties?
Phoebe: Oh, no umm, hi, that-that, you have to put that out, cause Im pregnant.
The Cigarette Smoking Guy: (No, not the Cigarette Smoking Man from The X-Files.) Well, maybe you and your baby should go to another strip club.
Rachel: (joining them) Well, I just checked our messages and Joshua didnt call. I mean youd think hed be worried about me not showing up at his club. Ugh, you know what makes it so much worse, Ross is all happy in Vermont!
Phoebe: Come on! Look where you are!!
Monica: (to the waitress) When you get a sec, another round of daiquiris.
Phoebe: Well, if you think it will help.
Chandler: No! That was a test! In a couple of hours Im gonna get really drunk and wanna call Kathy and you guys are gonna have to stop me! And then after that, Im gonna get so drunk, Im gonna wanna call Janice
Phoebe: You should! How is she?
Charlton Heston: Who in the hell are you?
Joey: I guess you wouldnt believe me if I said I was Kurt Douglas, huh?
Joey: No-no-no, no, no, wait. You see, Im an actor, Joey Tribbiani, Im doing a scene with you today, and well, I stink.
Charlton Heston: (shocked) Youre in this picture?
Joey: Yeah-yeah, Im one of the cops that wont work with you cause you a lose cannon. Anyway, look, Im really sorry, but I stink!
Joey: Oh no-no-no, you dont understand
Charlton Heston: I dont know one actor worth his salt that didnt say at one time or another, "God, I stink!" Hell, I just did a scene out there, first take, I stunk the place up. But, the important thing you must remember, no matter how badly you think you might stink, you must never, ever bust into my dressing room and use my shower! Do you understand me?!
Chandler: Oh yeah, that was great. Thanks to you, the hottest cocktail waitress there is quitting to teach the third grade!
Phoebe: Oh no! Wait! Wait! Okay, yknow what, you were right, you were right. We really werent great at being guys, but you know why? Because were girls.
Phoebe: And do you know what girls are really good at?
Phoebe: No, listening! Sit! Yknow, maybe it would just really, really help if you would just talk.
Monica: Yeah. And yknow, if you wanna cry, thats okay too.
Chandler: Okay, look, Im gonna have to ask you all to leave.
Chandler: I am totally picturing you with all those women!
Chandler: Stop it! Youre killing me! I think I just moved on to Phase Four!
Chandler: I know, I know, but youre gonna have plenty of chances. There are literally thousands of women out there just waiting to screw me over.
Ross: Emily is incredible. I mean there-there are no words to describe it, I mean the whole weekend was like a dream. (Sees Rachel coming back from the bathroom.) Oh! And you! Rach!
Ross: Hey! You were so right!
Ross: Uh, what you said, about us being in a place where we could finally be happy for each other.
Ross: I mean, I, I-I admit I-I wasnt quite there. Yknow, I mean the thought of you and that-that Josh guy
Ross: But now! Im there! Im totally there! Im-Im finally where you are!
Ross: Yeah, and-and thank you for Emily.
Rachel: Oh, no problem. Im so glad I could help. Happy for you. (She playfully punches him.)
Ross: Happy for you. (He punches her back.)
Rachel: No, happy for you! (Hits him harder.)
Chandler: All right ladies, heres what were gonna do. (Points to a stripper.) You are gonna take off my clothes. (To another two strippers) You two, go get the oils. (To another stripper) And you just constantly scream at the top of your voice, "Chandlers the king! Chandlers the king!"
Chandler: Come on! Would you please pay attention, I could wake up at any moment!
Chandler: What do you want from me, Ive never met the guy. So anyway, Rachel, Im sorry you cant stay, (Rachel is upset about leaving the orgy with the cigarette guy.) but the rest of us have a lot of work to do. (The cigarette guy starts rubbing Chandlers back.) What are you doing? (The guy just nods) All right, listen, Ive got to wake up!
Monica: Okay, youre fine.
Monica: Did you also have his album, It's Not Easy Being Green?
The Waiter: (To Joey) And for you sir?
The Waiter: Are you guys ready?
Phoebe: Umm, Im talking about that which you already know but wont admit. You love her again; you re-love her!
CHANDLER: So, uhh, em, you want me to uh, give you a hand with the foosball table?
Ross: Of course you would, your brains are smaller than mine!! (Rachel nods) Man, I can't compete with the guys she goes out with, they are so out of my league! oh my God!
Monica: Thank you. Just make yourself comfortable.
Monica: Ok, Mike, enough is enough, now you love Phoebe and she loves you, so you need to get over your whole "I never want to get married" thing and step up!
Elizabeth: (quietly) Hey umm, you brought protection right?
Rachel: You're right, I'm sorry. Thank you. Okay, that's what I'm gonna do.
Emily: All right, all right, if you insist on doing this, at least let me help you.
Rachel: Heeeeey, where have you been? (He shows her his thumb) What happened to you?
Monica: Well, yknow its none of my business, but arent you married?
Phoebe: There you go! (She continues to work him over with her elbows and he continues to yell in pain.)
Chandler: (returning) What are you guys talking about?
Monica: How crazy that wed run into you!
Rachel: Yeah! Hi Emma. Hey, why do you think she wont take my breast?
Ross: Really? Did you count Mississipily?
Wayne: Listen, I-I guarantee you keep your job if you can teach me how to talk to women like you do.
Phoebe: No spark? Didnt you sleep together?
Phoebe: Wow. So, okay, maybe that means that, youre not over Ross yet and you have issues with your father.
Monica: What else did you think about?
Rachel: Honey, honey, Im sorry, I know its our anniversary but I told you on the phone I dont have time to stop.
Monica: Oh, But you're finally doing something that you love! I can't ask you to give that up. Though it'd be nice if the thing that you love was y'know... finding gold.
Rachel: Hey, listen, Ronni, how long would you say Chandler's been in the shower?
Ross: You know, I'm just not uhm... that comfortable with a guy who's as sensitive as you.
Monica: It's just... It's hard enough not seeing you during the week, but for Christmas... alright, if this is what you have to do, I understand.
Ross: I told you it wasn�t long, but there is an amazing connection between us.
Ross: (to Chandler) What are you doing?
Rachel: No. No, you cant.
Phoebe: Will you get us better gifts?
Phoebe: (entering, hurridly) Hey, you guys! Look what I found! Look at this! (She hands Chandler a picture) Thats my Moms writing! Look.
Monica: You gave my father a lap dance!
Rachel: What handsome is not your type? Smart? Kind? Good kisser? What those things arent on your list? Ross is a great guy! You would be lucky to be with him!
Joey: Then why are you wearing Monicas jacket?
(He takes her into one of those typical interrogation rooms you see on TV and in the movies. Which is really appropriate here, since this is a TV show. What are the odds of that?)
Rachel: Yknow what? Thats a lot to remember, cant I just tell her youre a pig?
Chandler: Listen er..I need to ask you a favor but you can't tell Monica anything about it.
Carol: Oh no. I thought you said they could shoot the spot without you.
Rachel: And thank you for your time. (They both beat a hasty retreat.)
Monica: Ohh, sweetie! (Goes to comfort her.) Hey, I bet you anything that hes gonna call you again.
Woman No. 1: No. No, haven't seen a monkey. Do you know anything about fixing radiators?
Rachel: (reading the resume) And you were at this job for four years?
Ross: (To Rachel, standing by her feet) I dont know why you cant admit that you need me.
Chandler: Hey! Honey, can I ask you a question about the Valentines Day gifts?
Ross: No I-I-I would love to be around for you and the baby. And we-we can just try it like on a temporary basis.
Dr. Franzblau: I don't know, could be an hour, could be three, but relax, she's doing great. So, uh, tell me, are you currently involved with anyone?
Ross: Yeah. You can help me get my furniture back from Gunther.
Monica: I said that you had a nice butt, it's just not a great butt.
RADIO: Uh, we've just gotten a call from Rachel, and she told us what Ross did. It's pretty appalling, and Ross, if you're listening, I don't wanna play your song anymore. Why don't we devote our time to a couple that stands a chance? Avery, Michelle's sorry she hit you with her car and she hopes you two will work it out.
Ross: Okay. Well, you be careful.
Joey: Wait-whoa-whoa, you lost me.
Chandler: Hey! I will have you know that... aah, who am I kidding. Let's call the kid Geller and let Bing die with me.
MONICA: This is so wild. Ya know, I gotta admit, I was kinda surprised that you agreed to go on a blind date.
RACHEL: Why, when did you get out of the game?
Richard: Its so great seeing you guys again. Id like to make a toast. (Everyone raises their glasses) Uh, as a poet once said, "In the sweetness of friendship, let there be laughter and sharing of pleasures for in the due of little things the heart finds its morning and is refreshed."
Rachel: What are you talking about? I love them! (Looks into the cage) Yeah, I had a tarantula when I was a kid. But it-it died, because my cat ate it. And then, then my cat died. But Joey, isn't this cool?
Monica: Well, do you think he was waiting 'til after you left, so he could cry?
Chandler: Yeah! You?
Monica: Oh my God. Okay, go into the bathroom, use whatever you want, just don't ever tell me what you did in there.
Monica: Are you still awake?
Rachel: Okay Ross thats fine, but can you please stand near my head?
Chandler: Do you know what just happened?
Monica: What?! What are you doing?!
Phoebe: No he wont. And thats not even the point! Monica, I made a whole speech about you do not cancel plans with friends! And now yknow what? Just because, potentially, the love of my life comes back from Russia just for one night, I-I should change my beliefs?! I should change beliefs! No! No! No, if I dont have my principles, I dont have anything!
Monica: What?! Youre crazy! Theres nothing sexual about the noises I make!
MONICA: Oh, you are so great! [kisses him] Thank you!
Rachel: Well you have to because maybe its stupid.
Tag: Do you want me to check again?
Chandler: I can tell from your expressions that that's the good news you were hoping for... Well, I'm gonna go continue to... spread the joy.(Chandler leaves the apartment. Joey sighs)
Chandler: Well, did-did you correct him?
Rachel: You put these on my desk!
Phoebe: How do you know?
FBOB: Uh, public display of affection coming up. You can avert your eyes. [kisses Monica]
Ross: So what do you want me to do?
Phoebe: Okay do youOkay, do you have a search warrant? Because the last time I checked this was still America!
Chandler: Oh my God, I cant believe this! Yknow, I thought I thought you were a good guy.
Joanna: Wait-wait-wait-wait! You can put your sad little muffin back in its drawer. If you must know the truth, I didnt want to lose a perfectly good assistant.
Monica: Didn't you hear that speech? If you don't kiss him then I will!
Chandler: Do you wanna?
Chandler: Well its just while Monica and I were dancing to them it was the first time I knew that you were the woman I wanted to dance all my dances with.
Joey: What are you doing?
Rachel: (worried and shocked) Yeah, sure Mr. Zelner, for you anythingminute. Okay. Fine. (To Tag) Abort the plan, abort the plan. (She start to usher Tag out.)
Chandler: Okay. But if you dont come back soon, (She leaves and closes the door) theres pretty much nothing I can do about it!
Phoebe: All right. (she releases him). He is a good guy. You’re right, he wouldn’t cheat.
Ross: (disappointed) Sure, do whatever you want.
Helena: Well I wouldnt miss it for the world. Oh! Im getting all misty here! Youd think I was having my legs waxed or something. (Goes back on stage.)
Ross: Come on, you know they love you.
Monica: Wait what-wh-wh-what are you doing?!
Monica: As much as they love you?
Chandler: Good luck, man. I hope you get it.
Chandler: Really...? See... that's the thing: you gotta keep it smart, people!
Phoebe: (entering) Hey, you guys. Listen, Im sorry that I was hogging the game before(Sees the top ten list)Oh my God! Your friends have some unfortunate initials!
Phoebe: Well, you could use your position y'know as the roommate.
Rachel: Okay, you are going to tell her and youre going to tell her now. (She grabs his nipple and starts to twist it.)
Phoebe: But-but you know you cannot get involved with your assistant.
Joey: Okay. All right. Umm, so uh, so how did it happen? Did your eyes meet across the room? And then the next thing yknow youre in the bathtub together and shes feeding you strawberries?
RACHEL: Well, how did you find out?
Mr. Burgin: So, have you kids eaten yet?