words in movies
Rachel: Yeah? Well, you should know. Youve bought like a billion of em.
Ross: Yeah, you didnt get one.
Joey: Okay listen, how are you gonna ask her?
Joey: Youre gonna mess it up let me do it.
Rachel: Are any of you guys free tonight? My boss is hosting this charity event for underprivileged kids and the more people I bring, the better I look. So, Monica? Chandler?
Joey: Where are you going?
Rachel: How about you guys? (Points to Phoebe and Joey.)
Chandler: Well, you could also give back the money you owe me.
Rachel: Hey! Ross, listen can you come to a charity event tonight?
Chandler: Oh, so youre already doing your part for the kids.
Monica: Ross let me ask you a question. All jokes aside, where is this relationship going?
Monica: Do you really see this as a long-term thing?
Phoebe: Yknow, you are 12 years older than her.
Ross: Uh-uhWow! Uh, I thought you guys were just like making jokes, I had no idea. What you know what? You guys are wrong. Uh yes, there is a chronological age difference but I never notice it. You know why? Because she is very mature. Besides, it doesnt really matter to me what you guys think. I mean, Im the one dating Elizabeth, not you!
Chandler: Will you marry me? Will you marry me? (Makes like a gun with his fingers.) Hey, you marry me! (He gives up as Joey, Rachel, Phoebe, and Ross slink in all excited.) Whats going on little elves?
Joey: Its the big night! We wanted to wish you good luck!
Ross: Yeah, yeah you have the ring?
Chandler: Okay, now will you guys get out of here? I want this is to be a surprise and shes gonna know.
Ross: (to the rest of them) Yeah-yeah you guys. Get out of here!
Chandler: (To Monica) You are beautiful.
Monica: Oh, thank you! (The gang exhibits signs of quiet apprehension and wears knowing glances.) (Monica giggles.) Whats going on?
Rachel: Oh! Thank you!
Rachel: Uh well, uh this is a silent auction. They lay out all the stuff here and then you write down your offer and then the highest bid gets it.
Mr. Thompson: Nice to see you Rachel.
Mr. Thompson: So glad you brought someone.
Mr. Thompson: Well, I hope youre gonna bid on some things Rachel.
Rachel: Thank you. (Mr. Thompson walks away and after hes left.) Okay, (writing her bid down) twenty dollars.
Ross: Oh, you have to call the police! Thats what I did to the kids in my building!
Ross: Oh! (Does a laugh/groan.) Listen umm, I, I just stopped by to see if you wanted to see this play tonight. Umm, its supposed to be excellent. The director is the same
Elizabeth: (To Ross) You want some?! (Starts to squirt the Kamikaze at him.)
Ross: No! Okay! Okay! (Stops her.) Okay, look, can I, can I just-just talk to you for a second?
Ross: Uh, so this play umm, what do you think? Its-its gotten great reviews! Yknow the uh
The Girls: You put your balloons down!!
First Dorm Guy: You put your balloons down!!
Phoebe: Hey you guys! Look!
Rachel: What are you doing?
Phoebe: You just cant stand anyone else enjoying themselves cant you?
Rachel: Joey! It is an auction! You dont guess, you buy!
Phoebe: Forget her! You enjoy this!! (Pulls him back up and starts applauding again. Joey waves and does a salute.]
Monica: What are you doing?
Monica: Are you okay?
Chandler: Yes! Yes! Im good! Are you good? Are you good? Is everythingare youare you perrr-perfect?!
Chandler: Oh, yeah. (Starts to take it off and then realizes) Uh, no you cant have my jacket! Because then I would be cold! If you thought that you were going to be cold, you shouldve brought your own jacket. But uh, other than that, are you okay? Are you okay?
Monica: (laughs) Are you sure youre okay?
Chandler: Yes! Im fine. In fact Ive been fine for a long time now and I think, the reason is you.
Chandler: Okay umm, before I meant you I had really little life and I couldnt imagine growing old with
Monica: Hey, its good to see you!
Richard: You too, you let uh, your hair grow long.
Monica: YeahOh thats right. You, you always wanted me too. Hey, I see you got your mustache back.
Chandler: (to Richards date) And uh, you dont have a mustache which is good. (She just smiles.) Im Chandler; I make jokes when Im uncomfortable.
Monica: (to Richard) Its good to see you
Matire'd: (to Richard) Youre tables ready sir.
Richard: Oh. Good to see you guys.
Matire'd: (motioning to the empty table next to Monica and Chandlers) Or if you prefer, this table is available.
Rachel: What were you thinking?!
Rachel: Phoebe, dont you think youve had enough to drink?
Rachel: How is you drinking helping the kids?
Rachel: (stopping him) Hey! You cant leave Joey! You agreed to buy that boat, all right?! That is a contract! And plus if you leave, my boss is gonna kill me!
Rachel: I know. Okay. (Whispering and thinking.) Okay. Okay. All right. All right, this is what were gonna do, we are gonna go to the next highest bidder, and we are just gonna let them buy it, and then youre just gonna pay the difference.
Monica: So I hide in the shower and the next thing you know theyre going at it right on the bathroom floor.
Richard: Its so great seeing you guys again. Id like to make a toast. (Everyone raises their glasses) Uh, as a poet once said, "In the sweetness of friendship, let there be laughter and sharing of pleasures for in the due of little things the heart finds its morning and is refreshed."
Ross: Oh my God, you guys!! (Hes excited about what he thought happened.)
Chandler: (stopping him from going any further) Before you say anything, have we got a story for you! Guess who we bumped into at dinner!
Chandler: Oh you knew that. Good!
Monica: I thought you were going out with Elizabeth.
Ross: Yknow, maybe she is too young for me. Yknow, when I was over there and she was running around with her friends, I felt like I was a baby-sitter. I finally started to see what you guys were talking about. I dont know what to do.
Monica: Why dont you just weigh out the good stuff about the relationship against the bad stuff. I mean thats what I did when I first (looks at Chandler and pauses) weighing stuff.
Monica: If the school finds out youre fired.
Monica: Look Ross, the only question you need to ask is, "Do you see a future?" I mean like do you see yourself marrying her? (Ross pauses in consideration.) Oh my God! You did it already! You married her, didnt you?!
Chandler: Hey, you have to forget about Elizabeth. I mean if youre not careful you may not get married at all this year!
Rachel: (To Phoebe) Why do you care about the guy who won the Paris trip?
Rachel: Oh well, hello. This is your lucky day Mr. Bowmont, the uh gentleman day sailer as just become available again and I believe that you made a bid of $18,000.
Joey: Are you kidding me?! Shes gonna this boat!
Rachel: Okay look, let me paint you a little picture. (She sits down next to him.) All right, you are settin sail up the Hudson! Youve got the wind in your h(sees that hes bald)arms! You-you get all that peace and quiet that youve always wanted! You get back to nature! You can go fishin! You canooh, you can get one of those little hats and have people call you captain, and then when youre old, Cappy.
Joey: All that stuff you just said? I want that!
Rachel: But Joey you dont have $20,000!
Joey: Oh my God, youre back!
Monica: Why do you want to see my hand?
Phoebe: Eww! Oh, its all dirty. You should throw this out.
Chandler: (after the door closes) What did you guys just do?!
Chandler: Im gonna do it tomorrow yknow, and-and surprise her, but now youve ruined it!
Phoebe: Yeah! Yeah! Convince her that-that youre scared of commitment! Convince her that youre a little coward!
Joey: Hey, being you is finally gonna pay off! (They give each other fives.)
Rachel: (entering) Hey! (Sees Monica, gasps, and runs over to her.) Oh my God youre here, let me see your hand!!
Phoebe: No, youre too late!!! She already took out the trash!!!
Elizabeth: You suck!!
Monica: What are you up too?
Chandler: Oh, just hanging out, talkin about uh, websites. (Joey laughs.) Yeah, we saw this really interesting website about marriage and how totally unnecessary it is and how its just a way for the government to keep tabs on you.
Monica: Well thats a little crazy. Although I am yknow glad to hear that youre branching out on what you look at on the Internet.
Richard: Well, it was great seeing you the other night.
Monica: Oh, good to see you too. Did you come down here to tell me that?
Richard: No! I came here to tell you something else. (Pause) I came here (Pause) to tell you I still love you.
Monica: What uhWhat did youWhat?!
Richard: I still love you. And I know I probably shouldnt even be here telling you this, I mean youre with Chandler a guy I really like, and if you say hes straight Ill believe you! After seeing ya the other night I knew if I didnt tell ya Id regret it for the rest of my life. Letting you go was the stupidest thing I ever did.
Monica: Yknow youre really not supposed to be back here!
Richard: Well yeah, Im sorry. I know this is the wrong time and the wrong place but I had to tell ya! I wanna spend my life with you. I wanna marry you. I wanna have kids with you.
Monica: What the Yes youre too late! Where was all this three years ago?!
Richard: Well I know I was an idiot! And I tried to forget you, I really did! Yknow after we had lunch last year I spent six months in Africa trying to get you out of my head!
Monica: What were you doing in Africa?
Monica: Ohhh! What are you doing to me?! Oh look, I-I Im sorry but umm, this-this-this-this is not going to happen.
Richard: Okay thats fine, Ill walk away. And Ill never bother you again, but only if you tell me Chandlers willing to give you everything I am.
Richard: You are?
Joey: Hey uh, have you guys scene Chandler?
Monica: So that marriage stuff that you were saying yesterday, you dont really believe that do you?
Chandler: If marriage worked, Id be all for it. But do you know what the divorce rate in this country is? 97%.
Monica: Wait a minute. Are you honestly telling me that-that you may never want to get married?
Chandler: Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! What is all this pressure?! Is this some new kind of strategy? Why dont you put down your copy of The Rules huh mantrap?!
Phoebe: What do you mean?
Phoebe: You mean a backup?
Rachel: You do?
Rachel: Are you serious?!
Rachel: Wh So If neither of you are married by the time youre 40, youre gonna marry Joey.
Monica: Have you seen Rachel? Or a mirror?
Monica: Im just having one of those days where you realize youre in a dead-end relationship!
Joey: Chandler giving you a hard time huh?
Joey: Well, you know Chandler.
Joey: Maybe you changed?
Joey: R-R-Richard said he wants to marry you?! (Monica nods yes.) And-and Chandlers tellin ya how much he hates marriage?!
Monica: You just told me that he hates marriage! That-that hes a-a complex fellow whos unlikely to take a wife! That-that hes against marriage and always will be!
Joey: You got that from what I said?!
Ross: What happened you guys?
Rachel: Hey you!
Rachel: Oh thank you. Hey yknow, Im so sorry to hear about you and Elizabeth.
Rachel: So what do you say we make a pact? If you and I are both single by the time were 40, we get married. I mean, we know each other, we like each other, and weve-weve already slept together so yknow therell be no surprises there! You know what I mean? No like, "Whats that?!"
Joey: Where the hell have you been?!
Chandler: Well what Yknow what Im gonna do? Im gonna go over there; Im gonna kick his ass! (Pause) Will you help me?!
Chandler: Youre right.
Richard: I didnt ask. You wanna come in?
Richard: Uh, no! No! Thats art! If it bothers you I can put my art out.
Richard: So Monica let me ask you a question. Yknow, since we broke up do you ever, think about me?
Monica: Uh yeah, I-I actually I thought about you a couple months ago.
Richard: Yeah hes no good. Do you ever (pause) think about me in a (pause) non-eye doctor way?
Monica: But getting over was the hardest thing that Ive ever had to do. And I never let myself think about you.
Rachel: Phoebe! You picked Joey and Ross?! You can not have two backups!
Ross: Phoebe, how could you do this to me?!
Phoebe: I dontLook I dont know what youre complaining about now? You were both aware of the situation!
Rachel: Phoebe you cant have both of them! You have to pick one!
Phoebe: No wait! JustOkayJust wait! You guys! Wait you guys! Dont make any rash decisions, okay? Just remember my promise, when we get married, three times a week.
Phoebe: Left! (Rachel hands her the napkin in her left hand and they both unfold and read them.) Thank you.
Rachel: Youre welcome.
Monica: I missed this apartment! Now, this is a grown-ups apartment! Yknow, I-I should be with a grown-up, do you know what I mean?!
Richard: Yeah! Youre saying, you need to be with someone more mature. Maybe someone with, a license to practice medicine. Or a mustache.
Monica: Yknow, lets face it, Im not a kid anymore! I-I need to be with someone who-who wants the same things that I do! I mean coming to my place of work and telling me that you love me, I want that! Talking about pig sex over lunch, I dont want that!
Monica: Fair? Please dont even talk to me about fair! Fair wouldve been you wanting to marry me back then! Or fair wouldve been Chandler wanting to marry me now! Believe me, nothing about this is fair! Nothing! Nothing! Nothing! Nothing! Nothing! Nothing! Nothing! Nothing! Nothing! Nothing!
Richard: Yeah, I understand. Take as much time as you want. (Pause) Ten, even twenty minutes if you need it. Ill be here. Not smoking. (Monica leaves.)
Chandler: Where is she? Im not scared of you! (Averts his eyes and walks in.)
Chandler: Oh my God, I cant believe this! Yknow, I thought I thought you were a good guy.
Chandler: Nothing happened? Nothing? So you didnt tell my girlfriend that you love her?
Chandler: Yknow what? I cant believe this! Do you know what you did? My girlfriend is out there thinking things over! You made my girlfriend think!!
Richard: Well, apparently Im willing to offer her things that you are not.
Chandler: It was working until you showed up, you big tree! I mean, this isnt fair. You had your chance with her! You had your chance and you blew it! And this is my chance and I am not going to blow it because we are meant for each other! And this is all just been one stupid mistake! (Sits down heavily.) I was gonna propose tonight.
Richard: You were gonna propose? (Sits on the arm of the couch.)
Chandler: Yeah I even (pause) got a ring. (Puts in on the center cushion.) Did you get a ring?
Richard: No I dont have a ring! (Pause) You go get her Chandler. (Pause) And can I give you a piece of advice? If you do get her, dont let her go. Trust me.
Chandler: Yknow Richard you are a good guy.
Chandler: I cant talk to you now, I gotta find Monica!
Chandler: What are you talking about?
Joey: She was all crying. She-she said you guys want different things, and that and that she needed time to think.
Chandler: Well why didnt you stop her?! Why didnt you just tell her it was a plan?!
Joey: To her parents I think and she said you shouldnt call her. But if I were you I would.
Monica: You wanted it to be a surprise.
Chandler: Okay! (He joins her on one knee) Okay! Okay! Oh God, I thought (Starting to cry, pauses) Wait a minute, I-I can do this. (Pause) I thought that it mattered what I said or where I said it. Then I realized the only thing that matters is that you, (Pause) you make me happier than I ever thought I could be. (Starting to cry again.) And if youll let me, I will spend the rest of my life trying to make you feel the same way. (Pause as he gets out the ring.) Monica, will you marry me?
Monica: I knew you were likely to take a wife!
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, its just Monica and Chandler dancing to Wonderful Tonight on the Slowhand album by Eric Clapton. And you can buy that album from the CFSI, just click on the CDNow link.]
Ross: So you two are..?
Rachel: No, but you know what I mean.
Rachel: Can I ask you a question?
MONICA: There's no man in here.� How dare you accuse me of that.� (She slaps Chandler.)
Phoebe: Well, do you care about friendship?
Chandler: Oh well, this was a really important experience for me, and I wanted to share it with you.
Monica: Oh. Well, I didn't realize that you needed it back right away. I mean, you told me to go and be a caterer. So I went. I beed. I mean, I... I used it to buy all this stuff. But lookI've got another job tomorrow, so I'll pay you back with the money I make from that.
Monica: Oh, when you get over this breakup we need to go shopping.
Phoebe: What?! They took mine to give to you!
Phoebe: Good to see you.
Ross: This... this is exactly what I'm talking about. What kind of a guy makes... makes... delicate French cookies, huh? They're not even... butch, manly cookies with... with... you know with... with chunks. (takes a careful bite from the cookie)
Phoebe: Oh no, Rach, no no, you know youre never supposed to wake a sleeping baby.
Frank Jr.: Hi, how you doin'?
Phoebe: No, I'm just gonna help him, you know, get 'de-Ursula-ized', like you know, like I did for Joey after he went out with her.
Rachel: Oh, you bet.
Ross: Uh, do you wanna go change first? The doctors keeping the office open late for us, but if you hurry
Rachel: Okay, well, we brought you some wine.
Phoebe: So do you want to hang out or something?
Joey: Oh! I know how you can get him, take off your bra.
Ross: Well I told you it was Chandler who was smoking the pot but it was me. Im sorry.
Joey: Ok! All right, well... I'm gonna see if I can get a room for the night and I'll... I'll see you later!
Chandler: Thanks, its ah, Gaelic, for Thy turkeys done. So ah, Im gonna go, nice, nice meeting you.
The Security Guard: I'm just taking you outside!
Monica: Can I adopt you?
Phoebe: Fine! You go learn from your qualified instructor! But don't come crying to me when everyone's sick and tired of hearing you play Bad, Bad Leroy Brown!!
Chandler: You do? That's fantastic!
Phoebe: Oh did youwhat did youdid you work for two days straight?
Monica: Why don't you go see Dr. Gettleman?
Ross: Just, just say what you feel.
Ross: (Enters) Oh good, you haven't left yet.
Joey: Oh... yeah... Probably you don't even remember my name. It's Joey, by the way. And don't bother telling me yours, because I totally remember it... lady. Yeah! I waited weeks for you to call me.
Waiters: (with birthday cake, singing) Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you, happy birthday dear �
Parker: Ah! Oysters! Let me feed you one.
Dr. Green: You think you can knock up my daughter and then not marry her?! Im gonna kill you!!
Joey: (looking through his binoculars at a nearby building) Yknow what else makes you wonder?
Steve: It's really fulfilling doing something you hate for no money. That's right. I have no money, I'm not funny, I live in a studio apartment with two other guys, and I'm pretty sure I'm infertile.
Joshua: Kidding! (Rachel is relived) Im gonna get there early, but Im going to put you on the V.I.P list, okay? Look for me.
RACHEL: I didn't know you guys hung out.
Chandler: No-no, I dont think you heard me. Are you ready to party?!
Monica: (entering from her bedroom) So what do you think? (referring to her outfit)
Phoebe: I couldve been killed I hope you know!
Phoebe: Are you kidding? That's what sisters are for.
Colleen: You told him he's adopted?
Ross: What you got over there? Tacos?
Joey: Dude, are you okay?
Rachel: Ross, you don't seem okay.
Ross: (to Rachel) You see what men do! Dont tell me men are not nice! (points to Chandler) This is men!!
Joey: Morning. Here you go.
Ross: What do you mean?
Ross: Thanks. Did you stay here all night?
Helena: Monica! Where are you from?
Rachel: I just dont want him to meet anybody until I am over my crushAnd I will get over it. Its-its not like I love him, its just physical! ButI mean I get crushes like this all the time! I mean hell, I had a crush on you when I first met ya!
Chandler: So, you and Rachel tonight, huh?
Phoebe: Okay, now would you say that thats more than 50 yards away from Sting, his wife, or a member of his family?
Phoebe: Really?! Oh thats so exciting! Thank you! Thanks Mon! Oh but Mon, if you touch my guitar again Ill have to pound on you for a little bit.
Chandler: Just give us the cheapest room you have.
Joey: Well, I'm justif the paste matches the pants, you can make yourself a pair of paste pants and she won't know the difference!
Joey: This is so exciting for her. Well, Ill let you two fash ists get down to business. (Exits.)
Phoebe: Oh, wait, she's walking across the floor.. she's walking.. she's walking.. she's going for the pizza- (Yelling) Hey, that's not for you, bitch! (Phoebe covers her mouth with her hand walks away from the window.)
Ross: Well... I like how you look, what are you?
MONICA: Hey, Rache. You know what we haven't played in a while?
Joey: Well, that is usually what I would do. But I just never thought youd be on the receiving end of it. How could you do this?!
Rachel: (still not quite able to look at him) Hi! I love you on that show! I watch you everyday! I mean, when you took out your own kidney to save your ex-wife even though she tired to kill you
Assistant: Wow, you catch on quick.
Joey: Dude, you just described seven days worth of stuff. Youve got to spread it out a little, you know. Havent you ever been unemployed?
Ross: You sprayed my front twice!
Assistant: You might wanna get back in there.
Dirk: Hey! So what show are you on?
Mona: Yeah? Well you still shoulda told me.
Phoebe Sr.: Noo! No! It wasnt like that I... Remember how I told you how Lily, Frank, and I we were, we were close. Well, we were, we were very close.
Phoebe: Yeah, I know! (turns to Chandler) So, what do you think?
Monica: (turns to them) Ok, alright, you guys, you'd better sit down, this is pretty big.
Rachel: Oh my God! This is it! (She and Phoebe hold hands.) (To Phoebe) I really hope its you!
Phoebe: Why, why, why didn’t you just say no!
Phoebe: Yeah. Except for, y'know when youre on a date and youre getting along really great but the guys translator keeps getting in the way.
Monica: And you would?
Ross: Uh-huh, Carol, so were we. All right, just-just imagine for a moment, Susan meets someone and-and they really hit it off. Yknow? Say-say theyre coming back from the theatre, and they-they stop at a pub for a couple of drinks, theyre laughing, yknow, someone innocently touches someone else Theres electricity, its new. Its exciting. Are you telling me there isnt even the slightest possibility of something happening?
Chandler: And sometimes, I'll want you to steal third, and I'll go like this. (Does a baseball sign.)
SUSIE: My skirt, you lifted, kids laughing. I was Susie Underpants 'till I was 18.
Monica: (gets up) Okay, y'know what, Im not fine, Im not. I mean how can I be fine, hearing you come in with her, she wants to see your bedroom.... (pause) Y'know what, what if were friends who dont see other people?
Monica: Well, if you think about it, I am kind of like a Reverend. I mean, as a chef, I serve God, by feeing the hungry and poor. (looks very convinced about what she just said)
Chandler: Okay, here you go. (He deals out two cards each.) I have two queens, what do you have?
Chandler: You didn't like that?
Joey: Yeah, like you could find something as sophisticated as this.
Monica: Why don't you just call her?
Phoebe: Are you kidding? People acting like animals to music. Come on!
Joey: Hey Chandler can I talk to you for a second (points to the hall).
Chandler: Pheebs, what are you doing with the coat? How about the whole animal rights thing?
Phoebe: (holding a card and waving it in front of her face) Hey you guys, look, the one-eyed jack follows me wherever I go. (they look at her) Right, OK, serious poker.
Monica: What is the matter with you?! Do you want to fall into the trap? Do you want to fall into the trap?!
Monica: But you told them you werent?
Rachel: (pause as she realizes her lame attempt to shift the blame has failed) I am so hot for you right now.
Monica: (To Phoebe) You were going to cut me out?
Monica: (grabbing the gift from him and opening it) Okay! There you go! It's two tickets to Vegas!
Monica: Oh good God! If you want a baby so bad just go steal it!
Dr. Franzblau: I try not to let my work affect my personal life, but it's hard, when you... do what I do. It's like uh...Well, for instance, what do you do?
Monica: You wanna fool around with Joey?
Chandler: Well, aren't you a treat.
Ross: Ow! Ow! Okay, okay, fine, fine! All right, you wanna win by cheating, go ahead, all right. Phoebe the touchdown does count, you win.
Monica: Why don't you just be straight with her? Tell her the truth.