words in movies
[Scene: Central Perk, Monica and Phoebe are on the couch as Joey enters.]
Phoebe: What are you doing?
Joey: Are you kidding me? I never rent a movie without it! (Listens) Oh. (Listens) Uh, okay uh let me call you back. (Hangs up.)
Phoebe: Hey the wedding is so close! Are you getting nervous?
[Scene: Phoebe's apartment, Phoebe and Rachel are trying to plan Monicas shower.]
Rachel: Okay. Okay. (They sit down.) I think we can do this if we just get organized. All right? We have two days to plan this party. We just need to make fast decisions! Okay? All right, where are we gonna have it?
Monica: So, are you ready to go?
Monica: But you are?
Monica: Oh my God, what are you gonna do?!
Phoebe: Okay. Okay! Well okay, who do we know thats coming? Me. Are you?
Rachel: Are you makin him a sandwich?
Ross: (looking then moving away quickly) Uh-huh! Uh-huh! And-and-and Ill always remember that summer because thats when I realized that we are related.
Phoebe: How are you? (The woman nods) Good. (She goes over to another couple of women.) Hi, thanks for coming.
Phoebe: Who the hell are all these people?
Rachel: Well, I dont know. I called all the people in Monicas phone book and these are the only ones who could show up on 24 hours notice.
Joey: Thanks, you are such a good friend. And this is so weird.
Monica: What are you trying on now?
[Scene: Ross's apartment, Cassie and Ross are watching a movie and Cassie is pouring Ross some more wine as Ross has his hands full with the glass and holding the bowl of popcorn in his lap.]
Cassie: Hey! What the hell are you doing?! (They sit back up.)
Rachel: Oh Monica, we are so sorry.
(Suddenly, everyone stands up and comes out of hiding. All of them are glaring at Monica.)
Phoebe: Cassie, are you finding everything okay in there?
CHANDLER: You, you are gonna love this.
STEPHANIE: (singing) Smelly cat, smelly cat, what are they feeding you?
TOGETHER: Smelly Cat, Smelly Cat, what are they feeding you? Smelly Cat, Smelly Cat, it's not your fault.
Mr. Douglas: Ohh, its been better. The Annual Net Usage Statistics are in.
CHAN: Alright, OK, alright. But if we put on spandex and my boobs are bigger than yours, I'm goin' home.
[Scene: Central Perk. Chandler and Joey are sitting on the couch. Rachel is working.]
[Scene: Central Perk. Phoebe and Joey are sitting on the couch.]
Erica: I don't think so. Although, they did mention something about two heartbeats. But I thought that was just mine and the baby's. They kept saying both heartbeats are really strong, and I thought well, that's good 'cause I'm having a baby.
RACH: Oh, you're not having fun, are you?
MONICA: How many perfectly fine women are you gonna reject over the most superficial insignificant things?
RACH: Are you over me?
[Scene: The Restaurant, Joey, Lorraine, Chandler, and Janice are at the table. Joey and Lorraine are seated very close, Chandler and Janice have backed their chairs away from one another.]
MNCA: [reading the paper] There are no jobs. There are no jobs for me.
PHOE: Wow. What are you gonna use it for?
[Scene: Ross' apartment. Ross, Chandler, and Joey are there eating pizza.]
[Scene: Central Perk. Joey, Phoebe, Monica, and Chandler are there; Chandler is showing everyone his new computer.]
MNCA: We are talking about Rachel here. You and Rachel.
ROSS: How are you?
RACH: Good. How are you?
Rachel: Aah! Why? What are these for?
Ross: Hey! There are some men who will do whatever it takes to make their marriage work! Okay? There are some men who will stand by and-and watch as their wives engage in-in what only can be described as a twosome with some-some woman she barely knows from the gym!
JOEY: Oh, her ankles are a little chubby.
[Scene: Central Perk. Chandler, Monica, Joey, and Phoebe are there.]
JOEY: [opens the drapes] Hey, Ross! What are you doin'?
CHAN: What are you doing out there?
Frank Jr.: Alright, alright, alright. Remember what we talked about. When we're in a public place, there are certain rules.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Monica and Rachel are there.]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Monica, Rachel, Ross, and Phoebe are there. Phoebe is looking out the window.]
[Scene: Central Perk. Monica, Chandler, and Joey are seated at couches. Rachel is working behind the counter.]
Janice: Oh, are you sure? Really? Because you know, you could make little puppets out of them, and you could use them in your theater of cruelty.
PHOEBE: OK, I smell smoke. Maybe that's 'cause someone's pants are on fire.
PHOEBE: You just abandoned your whole belief system. I mean, before, I didn't agree with you, but at least I respected you. How, how, how are you going to go into work tomorrow? How, how are you going to face the other science guys? How, how are you going to face yourself? Oh! That was fun. So who's hungry?
RACHEL: Well, you know, honey, I don't think everybody gets Smelly Cat. You know, I mean, if all you've ever actually had are healthy pets, then, whoosh!
JOEY: Hey. [Phoebe takes off, Joey and Chandler are thrown back in the seat]
Ross: And that's why, no matter what mommy says, we really were on a break. (baby talk) Yes we were! Yes we were! (picks Emma up) Come here gorgeous. (puts her on his knees and talks to her) Oh! Look at you! You are the cutest little baby ever! You're just a... a little bitty baby, you know that? But you've got... (in a softer voice) You've got big beautiful eyes... Yes you do... and a... and a big round belly. (emphasises the B's) Big baby butt! I like big butts. (raps) I like big butts and I cannot lie / you other brothers can't deny / when a girl walks in with an itty, bitty, waist / and a round thing in your face you get...(Emma laughs) Oh my God, Emma... you're laughing! Oh my God, you've never done that before, have you? You never done that before... Daddy made you laugh, huh? Well, daddy and Sir Mix Alot... What? What? You... you wanna hear some more? Uhm...(raps) My anaconda don't want none / unless you got buns hon... (Emma laughs again and Ross looks worried) I'm a terrible father!
DUNCAN: Well I guess on some level I always knew I was straight. I though I was supposed to be something else, you know, I'm an ice dancer, all my friends are gay, I was just tryin' to fit in.
ROSS: Are you OK?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Ross, Monica, and Rachel are sitting around after the party. Chandler, Joey, and Phoebe enter.]
JOEY: Rach, these are for you.
Rachel: Honey, someday you are gonna make some man the luckiest guy in the world.
[Scene: The ladies' bathroom at the restaurant, Monica and Angela are talking.]
PHOE: Are... are you OK?
Ross: Well, then, I think, I think the guy is scum. I hate him. I mean I actuallyI-I physically hate him. I always have. You are way too good to be with a guy like that.
FBOB: Well, I would make them Belgian, but the waffles are hard to get into that flask.
MNCA: So, what are you saying now?
JOEY: What about Ross? I mean, are you still mad at him cause he made that list about you?
[Chandler and Joey are watching, Rachel turns their heads away from Monica.]
MNCA: What are you talking about?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Rachel, Chandler, and Joey are decorating the Christmas tree.]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. They are having their party. All the guests are stripped down because of the heat.]
RUSS: Are you a, uh, friend of Rachel's?
Joey: You guys, this is Shelley, shes interviewing me for Soap Opera Digest, and Shelley, this are my friends
ROSS: Yes, yes I am. And you are a....
ROSS: Yes, yes I am. Are you a, uh, a friend of Rachel's?
[Phoebe and Rachel are at the counter talking.]
RACH: Phoebe, what the hell are you talking about? Other than their names being similar, I'm sorry, I do not see what you're seeing.
MNCA: Bobby and I are going away for the weekend, remember?
PHOE: Hey, Julie! Hey, how are you doing?
Credits [Scene: Central Perk. Russ enters. Chandler and Phoebe are sitting on the couch.]
MONICA: Oh, you are so great! [kisses him] Thank you!
JOEY: Are you really not going?
MONICA: They love each other, and they wanna celebrate that love with the people that are close with them.
CHANDLER: Well, of course, lambs are scarier. Otherwise the movie would've been called Silence of the Ducks.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica, Phoebe, and Rachel are there. Monica is holding the wrapping paper from one of Rachel's gifts.]
(Decided that they are less than human as well, Chandler picks up a golf club and Monica a frying pan, to join in on the fun of beating their good friend to within an inch of his life!)
[Scene: Central Perk. Chandler, Monica, Rachel, and Phoebe are at the couch.]
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's apartment. Chandler and Joey are standing around in the kitchen.]
RACHEL: Oh, by the way Mon, I don't think the mailman liked your cookies. Here are the ornaments your mom sent. [hands her a smashed box]
ERICA: Oh Drake, you are so talented, let me see those hands. Oh these hands, these beautiful hands, oh I could just eat them. . . but I won't.
[Scene: Restraunt. Joey and Erica are still there.]
ROSS: Are you trying to get me to bribe you?
[They go into the apartment. Inside the apartment it looks like a sewage dump exploded and landed in her living room. There are clothes and food and junk covering every square inch of space. I mean pigs have nicer pens. Ross is completely shocked.]
PHOE: You're right, you're right. Ah, you are so yumm. [they hug]
[Scene: Central Perk. Phoebe and Rob are sitting on the couch.]
CHANDLER: Do you know me or are you just really good at this game?
Chandler: Someone's left a glass on the coffee table. There's no coaster. It's a cold drink, it's a hot day. Little beads of condensation are inching their way closer and closer to the surface of the wood...
Chandler: Sorry, I just cant sleep. Ooh! (Turns on the light and Monica groans.) Where is that book that you are reading with the two women who were ice-skating and wearing, wearing those hats with the flowers on it? Because every time I look at that cover Im like (Fake snores.)
(Chandler and Joey are dumbstruck for a moment)
[Scene: Library. Phoebe is getting ready to sing for the kids. Chandler, Monica, and Rachel are there.]
[Scene: Central Perk. Joey and the girls are sitting at the couches.]
PHOEBE: No, huh uh, I'm sorry, no. No, I'm not some like sloppy second, charity band. You know what, there are thousands of places in this city where people would be happy to pay to hear me play. (Out on the sidewalk, singing) When I play, I play for me, I don't need your charity. (Someone puts a coin in her guitar case) Thank you! La la la la la la la....
RACHEL: Uh, OK, I mean uh, what, how are you gonna handle it. I mean, are, are ya gonna, are ya gonna talk about it before hand, are you just gonna pounce?
ROSS: Hello. Oh hi, are you on your way ove-. Oh. No, no, I, I understand, I mean a monkey's gotta work. No it, it's no big deal, it' not like I uh, had anything special planned. Yeah OK, OK. OK, OK, bye.
CHANDLER: Well then, how do you know when vegetables are done?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Monica and Richard are there. Phoebe enters.]
JOEY: Are you naked in there?
JOEY: It really hit me last night. I'm gonna be on Days of our Lives. And then I started thinkin' about all of u, and how these are the days of our lives..
[Scene: The movie set. Monica and Rachel are saying goodbye to Jean-Claude]
[In the bathroom Susie and Chandler are kissing. She backs into a stall.]
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's apartment. Chandler and Susie are making out on the couch.]
Mike: (not amused) Are you rehearsing for some really bad mafia movie?
[Scene: Ross's apartment. Ross and Julie are setting the table.]
[Scene: Monica and Van Damme are walking down the street.]
[Scene: Central Perk. Ross, Phoebe, and Chandler are sitting.]
PHOEBE: (singing) ... with the double double double-jointed boy. Hey. So um, are you the professional guitar player?
GIRL 2 ON BUS: So what are you guys out doing today?
INTERVIEWER: Are they, uh, firm?
INTERVIEWER: So, uh, what are you going to do next?
INTERVIEWER: Alright, lets see if you're as good in person as you are on paper. Make me a salad.
Susan: You get to be the baby's father. Everyone knows who you are. Who am I? There's Mother's Day, there's Father's Day, there's no... Lesbian Lover Day.