words in movies
[Scene: Central Perk, its the same scene from the end of last weeks show. Phoebe and Rachel are sitting on the couch as Ross enters.]
{Transcibers note: In case youre wondering, and I know you are. Their names are all back to normal. Just in a slightly smaller font than usual to allow Courteney Cox Arquette to fit on one line and not be smaller than the rest of their names. Now, on with the show }
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Chandler and Monica are cuddling on the couch.]
Monica: Wait! Joey! Joey! Are you okay?!
Monica: No! Chandler and I are moving in together!
Monica: Well umm, Chandler and I are moving in together.
Phoebe: Ross, youre being ridiculous! Okay? You are cute and smart and sweet and that is much more important than three stupid divorces!
Phoebe: Yknow thats really fair. Yknow? Most guys who have been divorced three times are like 60. Ross, nobody cares about this except you! This-this embarrassment thing is all in your head! Here, Ill show you! Come here.
(She grabs his arm and drags him over to a table where three beautiful women are sitting. Now, Im going to go out on a limb and say that their names are Stephanie, Karin, and Meg. Okay, so I looked at the credits. Of course, only Meg is named later on, so Ill have to guess who is Stephanie and who is Karin. But, well cross that bridge when we come to it.)
Chandler: Okay, so thats it, everybody knows! Its official, were moving in together. No turning back. Are ya scared? Are ya?
Monica: Have a seat. (They sit at the table.) Okay, listen umm, Chandler and I are going to live together, here.
Rachel: And that was so sweet of you to ask! Oh my God, the three of us are gonna have such a good time living together!
Monica: Yes, we are. (Chandler is frantically trying to get Monica to correct her.)
{Transcibers note: Ill finish that one for those of you who dont know what theyre talking about. Where the towels are Hers and Hers and His, Threes Company too! Yeah, thats the theme song for Threes Company.}
Ross: (to the panel) Look, Im sorry, but you guys are wrong. I just dont want to be divorced three times.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Chandler and Monica are still debating about how to tell Rachel that Chandlers moving in and shes moving out.]
Chandler: Okay, when are we gonna tell Rachel what is actually gonna happen?
Monica: These arent for you! Are you upset?
Rachel: (gasps) Are you pregnant?!
Russell: There are a couple of forms to fill out.
Russell: Of course you did. Look Ross, you cant get an annulment unless you and Rachel are both there.
Rachel: Are you okay? Youre not blinking.
Ross: Its not that. Okay? Annulments are more complicated than I
Rachel: Monica and Chandler are really moving in here and I have to move out and everything is changing.
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey and Phoebe are talking.]
Rachel: Okay, who are you talking to when you do that?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel and Ross are entering]
[Cut to later, they are finishing up the pizza, theres one piece left.]
Helena: Before we go on with the show, I just want to say to the bride and groom how lucky they are to have found each other. In every life, a little rain must fall. Fortunately, in my life (Four guys wearing rubber boots, shorts, hats, and nothing else carrying umbrellas run onto the stage.) (Singing) Its raining men!
[Scene: Central Perk, Rachel and Monica are entering]
Chandler: What are you guys doing together?
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Joey and Janice are returning from their DAY OF FUN!]
Rachel: That is so sad. Your missing out on so much, Ross. I mean, the bonding and the sharing, you know. And-and knowing that someone else is going through the same thing you are.
Monica: Hi, Dad, what are you doing here?
Monica: I don't, I just, I just like the smell of them. So, uh, what are you really doing here Dad?
Monica: You're not just saying that are you?
Mr. Geller: So, how are you doing?
PHOEBE: Are you the cutest?
Phoebe: Excuse me. Excuse me! (Mrs. Bukart stops singing) Thanks. Um, clearly this is a very, very hard time for you. Um, but, um, we provided a service, and we deserve to be paid because you ate that service, and, um, we are not leaving here until we're paid every penny. 'Cause you know what, lady? We're part time caterers, and we have no place else to go.
Ross: You see this, this is a person who is ready to go. Phoebe you, oh, you are my star.
Monica: (to Ross) Ooh, are you gonna do magic?
Ross: (on machine) "Hi Rach, are you there? It's me, pick up. Rachel. Rach!"
Joey: Monica, how are you gonna do that?
Ross: Okay, Mon, I really don't think this is the... Okay, you're dialing, you are dialing.
Chandler: What are you doing?
Chandler: I say, Drew! Are you seeing anybody right now? (Drew looks at him) Og-ee-op, Im not asking for me, Im I mean No, Im-Im not gay, Im not asking you out. Im not-Im not-Im not gay!
Chandler: Are you actually saying these words?
Ross: Not for tonight. Not for tonight! Wh-what, what, what, are you doing?
Chandler: What are you, what are you gonna show me my clothes?
MONICA: I can't believe you guys are actually getting tattoos.
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe, with the puppy, Monica, and Rachel are sitting on the couch.]
MONICA: One hour? You are such a leaf blower.
Janice: Uh-oh-okay. Uh-oh-okay. I know what you all are thinking. But Chandler is in Yemen! I'm a young woman! I have needs! I can't wait forever!
Phoebe: Ross, went to get a cab so we can all... No, wh-what are you doing! No, Monica, no!
Joey: Excellent! Excellent! And uh, finally, are you into any weird stuff yknow, sexually?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Ross and Rachel are entering]
Chandler: We're not gonna talk about girth are we?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Ross and Rachel are entering]
Rachel: All right are you guys gonna come down?
Chandler: Yeah. (they both notice where his hands are)
Joey: (with food in his mouth) You talked to him. Are you crazy?
Rachel: Are you serious?
Ross: What are you talking about?
Monica: Hey. Its three in the morning. They dont know that Ive come home yet. You notice how neither one of them are wondering where I am.
[Scene: Chandler's bedroom, Janice and him are cuddling]
Rachel: Phoebe, what are you doing?
Phoebe: What are you saying I should do?
Malcom: What are you doing?
Ross: (to Chandler) Are you intrigued?
Chandler: Well, it's official there are no good movies.
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler, Monica, Janice are sitting on the couch, and Phoebe is sitting next to them in the chair.]
Joey: What, what are you doing? What are you doing?
Ross: Okay, well here we are. Now were in a tough spot again, Rach. What do you want to do? How do you want to handle it? Huh? Do you wanna fight for us? Or, do you wanna bail? (sits down next to her) Look, I, (on the verge of tears) I did a terrible, stupid, stupid thing. Okay? And Im sorry, I wish I could take it back, but I cant. (We see Monica and Phoebe are almost in tears.) I just cant see us throwing away something we know is so damn good. Rachel, I love you so much.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Carol and Susan are dropping off Ben]
Monica: There it is. Joey, what are you doing?
Rachel: Men are unbelievable.
Ross: You didn't want to share your tomatoes, tomatoes are very important to you.
Rachel: Ross, you are so pathetic. Why can't your son just play with his doll? (uses the Milk Master 2000 to pour milk into her cereal)
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Chandler and Janice are having dinner]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica and Rachel are comforting Chandler]
Joey: Pheebs! There you are!
Janice: Are you being British?!
Janice: What are you doing here?
Janice: Why are you shopping here? You don't live in this neighborhood. Were you here waiting for me?
[Scene: The Airport, Chandler and Monica are following the previous couple through a tiny hallway that proves this is a set on a sound stage and not an actual airport, and see them enter the first class lounge.]
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey and Phoebe are there]
Ross: Hey, what are you doing shopping at eight in the morning?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Carol and Susan are picking up Ben, while Monica is pouring chocolate syrup, lots of it, into her ice cream.]
Monica: What are you being such a weenie for? So he has a Barbi, big deal. You used to dress up like a woman.
Ross: What are you talking about?
Pete: I see him, you guys are just the worst hiders ever.
Janice: Ohhh, are you a puppy! (opens it) Contact paper! I never really know what to say when someone you're sleeping with gives you contact paper.
RACHEL: Well, well um, you know, these movies are offensive and uh, degrading to women and females. And uh, and the lighting's always unflattering. And, Monica help me out here.
Frank: How are you?
Monica: I cant live like this! What are we gonna do? What are we gonna do?
Rachel: Oh my God! You are giving this a lot of thought.
Phoebe: All right, there are no questions in the happy place. Okay, just, the warm breeze, and the moonlight flowing through the trees....
[Scene: Phoebes, Phoebe and Frank are watching TV.]
Phoebe: No, no, you can get one yourself. Itll be on the house! Y'know what are big sisters for?
Phoebe: No, no, no, I wouldnt do you myself, I mean that would be weird. Yeah, no, Ill get one of the other girls to do it. Oh, this will be so much fun! Hey! Are you excited?
Monica: Its beautiful! Its like the first bathroom floor there ever was. (Chandler tries to go to the bathroom) Whoa! Are you going in there for?
Joey: So we are going on two?
Monica: Rach, are you really gonna let him do this?
Monica: Are you serious? (they all look) Oh my God.
[We see the rest of them are now crying.]
[Scene: Monica and Phoebes, three years earlier, Phoebe, Monica, and Ross are there]
Monica: Windows are clean, candels are lit. Uh, belt's to tight, gotta change the belt. Did I turn the fish? (goes over to the kitchen to check on the dinner) No, cause I made lasagne. (to Rachel) Am I out of control?
Ross: Hey, y'know while were on that, when are you gonna tell my sister that you dont live here anymore.
Ross: Yeah, um, okay see, you were, you were on the list but my friend, Chandler (Chandler waves) brought up the very good point that you are international, so I bumped you for Wynona Rider, local.
Chandler: Just coffee! Where are we gonna hang out now?
Phoebe: So what are they doing?
Monica: What are you doing with the lamp?
Mr. Heckles: (to Eric) Who are you?
Monica: Whoa! Are you okay?
Monica: Oh my God!!! What are you doing?!!
Monica: What are you talking about?
[Scene: at Barry and Mindy's reception, Monica and Richard are sitting at a table, and Monica is trying to throw a piece of candy into his mouth.]
Phoebe: Aw, honey its not your fault, y'know this is who you are, and I love you, and I want us to be friends, and if I keep living here I dont see that happening.
[Scene: the bar, Ross is entering, Phoebe is at the bar, they are the only two in the place.]
[Scene: Monicas, Chandler and Monica are still hugging each other.]
Ross: Stupid balls are in the way. (holds up two balls)
Monica: Hey, are you okay?
Rachel: Yeah, we could. Oh hey look! Theres some Kappa Kappa Deltas! I was a Kappa. (to them) Hey sisters! (They ignore her.) (To Monica) Wow, we really are bitches.
Ross: So I told Carl, Nobody, no matter how famous their parents are, nobody is allowed to climb on the dinosaur. But of course this went in one ear and out.....
Monica: Oh good, another dinosaur story. When are those gonna become extinct?