words in movies
Phoebe: Oh, he's at the doctor, he didn't poop the whole time we were there!
Ross: (looking at Rachel entering with Emma) Oh, hi! Hi! Thanks for showing you up thirty minutes late!
Ross: No, no, no, I'm sure you have a great excuse, wh-was it a hair appointment, a mani-pedi or was there a sale at Barney's?
Rachel: My father had an heart attack... (crying) ...while I was at Barney’s.
Rachel: Ohh... (Ross mouths HA-HA at Monica and takes two cookies and she looks at him angrily)
Joey: Oh, you know what you should do? You should walk all the way at the top of Statue of Liberty.
Phoebe: Noooo! Ok, maybe if we just break it down. Ok, let's try at one syllable at a time. Ok? So repeat after me. "je".
Ross: Ok, well, uh, I can maybe grab a sleeping bag, or...(There's one of those moments. They're staring at each other, no word uttered, and then she leans toward him in order to kiss him, but he ducks and avoids her more than once.) Oh, oh. (he then hugs her and when she tries to kiss him again, he stands up and she falls down on the bed). No, Rach! I'm sorry, I just don't think this, this, this is a good idea.
Erica: Well, if there is anything else you wanna know... (Monica and Chandler look at each other)
Rachel: (She turns around very slowly, looks at him for a second and then turns back to her coffee) Sure. (She gives him the cup she was pouring for herself without looking at him)
Rachel: Hmm-hmm. (starts to pour herself a cup of coffee, never looking at Ross)
Rachel: In the future, when a girl asks for some ill-advised sympathy sex... just do it. (she smiles fakely at him)
Ross: (half amused) Wait, wait, (looks around a little) You're mad at me about last night? I was just trying to do the right thing.
Ross: That's right, sex is off the table. (The door starts to open behind him and Dr. Green emerges) I am never having sex with you again. (Rachel stays quiet and after a few moments Ross realizes what has happened. He turns abruptly) Dr. Green, are you feeling better? (Rachel's dad glares at him with a deadly look)
Erica: (To Chandler) We had a good time. By the way, I wanted to ask you something. It would really mean a lot to me, if the baby was a boy, that you name him after my father, Jiminy Billy Bob (Monica smiles at Chandler and his he looks shocked and scared, getting no support from his wife)
(The director looks at Joey and he nods.)
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's apartment. Rachel is sitting at the kitchen counter and Ross enters from Rachel and Emma's room.]
Monica: Of course you can look at it! Yeah, I want your opinion too!
Chandler: Why are you napping over here instead of over at your place?
Chandler: Now, do I get to look at this book or is it just for people who are actually involved in the wedding?
Phoebe: Whats the big deal? I did it at Monica and Chandlers!
Monica: Well, at least youre not hearing it for the first time at your fifth grade Halloween party.
Phoebe: Ohh, you and your ways. (She shakes the bell at him and sits down.) Since its Christmastime. Im going to be one of those people collection donations.
Rachel: Well what happened at dinner?
[Cut to the inside of Monica and Rachel's apartment, Monica and Rachel are sitting at the table.]
Joey: Right!(he starts to ape her)"Oh my God, is this the men's room? Oh, I feel so foolish, have you always known you wanted to be an actor?" (he inclines his head as if to look at a man's private parts)
Ross: (looking at the table) Excuse me ladies. (To Phoebe) Im sorry?
Chandler: Clearly I did not start drinking enough at the start of the meal. (Starts to make up for lost time and takes a big swig of his drink.)
Rachel: Pheebs, this whole apartment thing is just a nightmare! Every place I can afford comes with a roommate who is a freak. I mean, look at this; (Points to one and starts to read it.) "Wanted. Female roommate, non-smoker, non-ugly." Its just, there is nothing! The citys full!
Phoebe: Not unless someone borrowed it and left it at the gynecologist.
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Chandler is looking at the wedding book as Monica enters.]
(Chandler looks over and sees Ross glaring at them.)
Monica: No! Wait! I think I can figure out the recipe from this cookie! I do stuff like this at work all the time.
[Scene: Ross's apartment, Ross is prying at the Magic 8 Ball with a screwdriver as there's a knock on his door which he goes to answer.]
Ross: Over here. (You can see Ross sitting at the far wall.)
Joey's Doctor: Are you ready? It's time to try peeing. (Joey makes a face like he is trying to pee.) Wait-wait-wait-wait-wait! It's almost time to try peeing. (Points at the bottle Joey is to pee into.)
Rachel: Look Joey, Im sorry if-if you thought that was mean, but I gotta tell ya something. That was not mean. Okay, my father is mean. He used to yell at me all the time on the boat, I mean it was horrible. I was just being a good teacher.
Joey: They uh director. Uhh, her. (Points to an old woman standing behind him. Who glares at him and walks off.) All right, all right, it's not a gladiator movie. I work here.
(She looks at Ross, a bit ashamed. Chandler mimes "big breasts" to Ross and lip syncs "Wow". Ross looks at him, astonished and then Monica looks at Chandler again. A little too late he changes the "big breasts" mime into "rocking a baby". When he realizes Monica might have seen it he also strokes his imaginary baby's head.)
Joey: Yes! Yes! You did and youre still yelling at me!
Rachel: No! No! No! Im not yelling at you, Im just yelling near you. Oh God Joey, ohh Im my father. Oh my God, this is horrible! Ive been trying so hard not to be my mother I did not see this comin. Oh, Joey, Im sorry. Im so sorry. I just wanted you to learn.
Zack: No it's just tiring having to figure out the age at which all my grandparents died. I'll see you tomorrow.
Joey: Ugh! I dont know what Im going to do! I called the company that sent and th-they dont care! Then I called 9-1-1 and they laughed at me, if this isnt an emergency, then what is?
(They both break into a huge laugh and do that stop motion thing they had at the end of ChiPs.)
Joey: Uh Rach, if youre gonna start another story, at least let me finish mine.
Rachel: (reading the resume) And you were at this job for four years?
[Scene: The Hallway, Chandler is running up the stairs and towards his apartment, but Joey is taking out the garbage at the same time and stops him in the hall.]
Ross: Look, just because some idiot drew on your face doesn't mean you shouldn't have any fun! Okay? And besides, hey-hey-hey no one is even gonna look at you. Okay? This is Vegas! Hello! There are tons of other freaks here! (Rachel turns around and glares at him.) There are tons of freaks here. No other. No. Come on! No one will notice, I swear!
(At this point, Buffay, the Vampire Layer and Nasforatool start to get it on. Of course, since this is network TV, we can only see the reactions of the gang to the film playing off screen.)
Rachel: But, Pheebs, you can still use the copy machine where I actually work. But, just come by at lunch so my boss doesnt see you. Cause Kim will just freak out and she already doesnt like me very much.
Joey: Yeah, yknow at first I thought we could talk about this yknow, work it out, but uh, seeing you two together I dont think I
Tag: Right. So I guess I shouldnt put good at noticing stuff on my resume. (Sets the plant down on her desk.)
(Phoebe and Rachel both pause, look at each other, and go press their breasts against him. Which Joey doesnt mind, of course.)
Phoebe: Lets see. (Looking at the picture) Oh my God! Oh But no! No! You cant-you cant hire him, because thatits not professional. Umm, this is for me (The picture) yes? Thanks. (Puts it in her pocket.)
Joey: Uh, well they might be a little mad at me over there.
Rachel: Tag? (He turns and looks at her.) Hi, who was that?
[Scene: Rachels office, shes looking at a picture of Tag when he knocks and enters.]
Monica: (looking at one) Oh, heres a great one.
Monica: So Nancy told me about this job at this great restaurant, Javo (sp?). It's just a little outside of Tulsa.
Monica: Do you really want to pull at that thread?
Phoebe: Oh my God! Thats the creep that youre with at the Statue of Liberty.
Ross: So do we!! So do we!! (Ross notices a couple has been staring at them.) Im sorry you had to see that.
Chandler: (looking at the tape) Joey, this is Die Hard 1 again.
Joey: Hey! Well I hope it goes better than the last time you did it for that girl downstairs, remember? (Phoebe glares at him.)
(Chandler picks up the timer being used and turns it to zero at which it chimes.)
Monica: (pointing at Rachel) De-caff. (to All) Okay, everybody, this is Rachel, another Lincoln High survivor. (to Rachel) This is everybody, this is Chandler, and Phoebe, and Joey, and- you remember my brother Ross?
Phoebe: Thats ridiculous Rachel, we were all babies once. (Rachel looks at her.) Oh, you mean today.
Phoebe: (looking at the picture again) Man alive!
Monica: Really? Okay, so why dont you tell me what happened to Ross Junior year at Disneyland?
Rachel: OH MY GOD!!! (She holds her hands up in triumph and the gang all look at her.) Sorry, I was just imagining what itd be like to catch the money bouquet.
Ross: Well now lets-lets look at this objectively, I think I should date her
Joey: (gesturing at an imaginary painting) Note the painterly lines and subtle impasto on this canvas. Monet painted quickly and usually outdoors as his elusive subject was light itself.
Joey: I like to see the previews. (Rachel looks at him.) The candy.
Ross: My doctoral dissertation is in the library at school, I went to see it, and there were students makin babies right in the middle of the Paleontology section!
Young Ethan: Well, think about it. It's always on the news. 'A man is being held up, at gunpoint.' 'Tourists are being terrorised, at gunpoint.' And I just kept thinking: why does people continue to go there? (He checks his watch.) Oh, ah. I should go.
Phoebe: Yay!! Oh so, youre not, youre not mad at us anymore?
Joey: No-no-no-no-no! Its a surprise, but its gonna be tricky thought because she said she was gonna be pretty busy at work for a while.
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Chandler and Monica are sitting at the kitchen table and are still trying to decide what to do about Janice.]
Joey: Y'know what I mean, about how I'm always going out with all these women. And I always figured, when the right one comes along, I'd be able to be a stand-up guy and go the distance, y'know? Now I'm looking at my dad, thinking...
Chandler: I just wanted to show Monica your book. (Ross just glares at him.)
Chandler: No, we're playing this game I learned at work. You have to name all the states in six minutes.
Phoebe: Umm, sympathy pains. I thought it was really sweet at first, but now I think he's just trying to steal my thunder.
Chandler: Oooh that may be a New World's record (Looks at his watch and picks up Ross' pad)
Monica: Are you crazy?! We own those two! I mean look at 'um, he can't breath and she's popping pills.
[Scene: Central Perk. Joey sits at a table and Chandler and Monica enter.]
Joey: Half hour. (Rachel turns to look at him and he nods yes.)
Monica: Please, don't listen to Joey, okay. Would you look at him? He-hes obviously depressed. He's away from his family; he's spending Thanksgiving with strangers. What he needs right now is for you to be his friend.
Tag: (looking at the street) Oh my god! Those guys are stealing my car! (He points down to the street)
Paul: And anyhow, Im sorry I was so harsh before, but you have to understand that I (pause) still look at Lizzie like shes a twelve-year-old girl.
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Joey and Ross are napping together again and both wake up at the same time.]
(We can hear the dog whining at a high pitch.)
Phoebe: (gasps) You wouldnt! Okay look, Rachel I know you really want to do this, but I-Ive never been maid of honor to anyone before! And I know youve done it at least twice!
Chandler: Please, please, please, don't be mad at me.
(Rachel goes to the fridge, opens it, and blows on the whistle Monica gave her at the store, which causes Phoebe and Monica to turn around and look at her.)
Tag: Yes, at 4:00.
Ross: (stunned at the complement) Youre welcome.
Chandler: I am sorry, but some of us have to get up early and go to work! (Monica looks at him) (To Monica) He does not know that I am not some of us.
Tag: I'm okay. I gotta go down to the police station and look at mug shots.
Gary: (looking at Monica.) Mm! Seems like I wouldve remembered you!
Monica: Oh, you really want to talk about getting people to like you huh, funny man? (Joey laughs but stops when Chandler turns to glare at him.)
Ross: Yes!! Yes!!! (He starts clapping and Phoebe turns around to look at him and falls off the bike.)
Mr. Zelner: Umm, no. Thanks, but Ill give these to Betty. (Rachel glances at Tag to say, "See?") So I read your evaluation of Tag, or to use his full name, Tag Sweetcheeks Jones. Is something going on with you two?
Rachel: Youre lookin at it upside downyknow what? (Grabs the evaluation and throws it out.) It doesnt matter.
The Man: Were waiting for the candy. (Yelling at the door.) Bring out the candy!
Rachel: (looking at his butt) There it is. (They hug.)
Tag: I feel great. (Rachel laughs) In fact! (Walks over to her desk, sweeps its contents onto the floor and Rachel just glares at him.) What?
Chandler: Forty-five minutes? We have tickets to the Musicman at 8:00.
Ross: We have 8:00 reservations at Grammercy Bistero.
Ben: Santa's mad at me.
Phoebe: Dont be worried about that! Your tombstone can say whatever you want it to say! It could say, Ross Geller, Good at Marriage! Yknow? Mines gonna say Phoebe Buffay, Buried Alive.
Rachel: (stopping at Phoebes entrance) Ha!
Chandler: That sounds like my first bike. (They all turn and look at him.) My dad gave me his old one.
[Scene: Rachels Office, shes at her desk while the mailman delivers her mail and calls Tag in.]
Chandler: Hey! (Grunts as Ben hits him at full speed.)
Chandler: You called everyone and said you were having trouble finding a Santa costume, so I borrowed one from a guy at work!
Rachel: Well of course we will help you decide! We will do anything we can to help you! Now, I would like to make a toast, to the future Mrs. Chandler Bing (A woman at the table behind them overhears Chandlers name and starts listening closer), my best friend, and truly one of the nicest people that
Rachel: Oh wow! Look at this place!