words in movies
Ross: (Thinking it over) Sure! (Takes one) Hey, I just found out, I get Ben for the holidays this year.
Phoebe: And maybe I could teach Ben about the Christmas skull and how people die.
Rachel: You may need to use this year to teach Ben about Phoebe.
[Scene: Ross's apartment, Ross is whirling Ben around.]
Ben: No.
Ross: Well, I do, so let's... (Ben and Ross sit down on the couch) So, Ben, you uh, you know what holiday is coming up, don't ya?
Ben: Christmas.
Ben: Christmas eve.
Ross: Yes, but also (Pauses to let Ben answer, but he doesnt.) Hanukkah! See, you're part Jewish, and-and Hanukkah is a Jewish holiday.
Ben: Santa has reindeers that can fly!
Ben: (singing) Jingle bells, jingle bells...
Ben: (singing) Rudolph, the red-nosed reindeer...
Ben: When is Santa coming?
Ben: No Santa? Was I bad?
Ross: No! Oh, no-no-no. Hey, you weren't bad, you've been very good, Ben.
Ben: Santa's mad at me.
Ross: No, hey-hey, come on, (He grabs Ben and sits him on his lap) Ben, Santa is not mad at you, okay? Hey, you're-you're his favorite little guy!
Ben: So Santa's coming?
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Monica has just opened the door for Ross who is costumed as an Armadillo. Ben is standing next to her.]
Ross: I'm the holiday armadillo! I'm a friend of Santa's and he sent me here to wish you (Points to Ben) a Merry Christmas!
Ben: Texas?
Ross: That's right, Ben. I'm Santa's representative for all the southern states. And Mexico! But, Santa sent me here to give you these presents, Ben. (He tries to bend down to pick up the bag with the presents, but can't because of the costume) Maybe the Lady will help me with these presents.
Ben: Wow! Thanks!
Ross: You're welcome, Ben. Merry Christmas, ooh, and Happy Hanukkah!
Ben: Are you for Hanukkah, too? Because I'm part-Jewish.
Ross: (to Monica) You wanna wander in the hall? (to Ben) Ooh, hey Ben, what if the Holiday Armadillo told you all about the festival of lights?
Ben: Cool!
Monica: Come on Ben.
[Monica and Ben sit down on the couch.]
Ben: Santa! (Runs to Chandler and hugs him)
Chandler: Hey! (Grunts as Ben hits him at full speed.)
Chandler: Well, I'm here to see my old buddy Ben. What are you doing here, weird turtle-man?
Ross: I'm the Holiday Armadillo, your part-Jewish friend. You sent me here to give Ben some presents. Remember?
Ben: Did you bring me any presents, Santa?
Chandler: You bet I did, Ben, put it there! (He shakes Ben's hand, but the money falls out of his hands) (to Monica) Well, it would have worked this time, if his hands weren't so damn small! (Realizes, that Ben is standing right there) Ho, ho, ho!
Monica: Okay Ben, why don't you come open some more presents, and Santa, the Armadillo, and I have a little talk in the kitchen? There's a sentence, I never thought I'd say.
[Ross turns around and walks back to Ben.]
Ross: Okay Ben, Santa has to go. Say good-bye!
Ben: No! Why does he have to go?
Ben: No! Why can't the Armadillo leave? I want Santa!
Chandler: Well, I'll stay, but only because I wanna hear about Hanukkah. Ben, will you sit here with Santa and learn about Hanukkah?
Ben: Okay, Santa!
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Santa (Chandler), Superman (Joey), Ben, and Monica are listening to the Holiday Armadillo (Ross) finish telling the story of Hanukkah.]
Ben: (answering him) Eight whole days.
Ben: Awesome!
Ross: The Armadillo was actually not so thrilled about that part! Okay Ben, its time to light the Hanukkah candles! (Santa, Superman, Monica, Ben, and the Holiday Armadillo go over to the menorah to light the candles.)
Ben: (on the bike) Im ready!
Ben: Uh-huh!
Ben: (To Chandler) Thanks daddy.
[Scene: Central Park, Ross is teaching Ben how to ride a bike. Chandler, Monica, and Phoebe are they also.]
Monica: Matt Guire, Mark Lynn, Ben Wire
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Phoebe is watching Bert and Ernie with Ben.]
Ross: Thats right! Wait no, Ben.
Rachel: Ben, its Rachel! (He closes the door.) But whatever.
Rachel: Hi! Hi Ben!
Ben: (running to the bathroom) Thanks Phoebe!
Ben: Hi.
Ben: Ill be okay.
(Ben starts to go, but Ross stops him.)
Ross: (to Ben) Okay! All clear!
Ben: Whats a virgin?
Ross: (to Ben) Everything okay in there?
Ben: Dont talk to me now!
Ross: Well, Ben would be there.
Ben: Not really.
Ben: Bye dad.
Ben: Okay.
Ben: Im not allowed to have soda.
Ben: Really? Like how?
Ben: Cause you guys were on a break.
Ben: But youre not anymore!
Rachel: Ben yknow when uh, when you were a baby, you and I used to hang out all the time. Cause I was, I was your daddys girlfriend.
Rachel: Yeah, I-I-I-Im funny Ben, but Im not stupid. Okay?
Ben: Yeah, youre funny.
Ben: (laughs) Thats a good one.
Ben: Can I do it to you?
Ross: Yes! Ben learned a little trick.
Ben: (jumping up from behind her chair) Gotcha!! (Rachel jumps up startled.)
Carol: Hey Rachel! (The camera cuts to her face and we see that Ben pulled the quarter trick with her as well.)
[Scene: The Midfield Day School, its after school and Ben is taking a drink of water as Phoebe enters.]
Rachel: I found him! (To Ben) Very funny, come here! (She sits down on the coffee table and Ben walks up.) That is exactly why Ive come here to talk to you okay?
Ben: (mimicking her) Remember all that stuff I taught you yesterday?
Rachel: Well yknow I was just in the neighborhood and I passed by your building and I thought to myself, "Whats up with Carol and sweet, little Ben?"
Ben: Oh crap!
Ben: Dont do that.
Ben: Oh damnit!
Ben: Damnit!
Ben: Damnit!
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Rachel and Ben are sitting on the couch bored out of their minds.]
[Cut to Carol and Susans apartment, from next weeks episode Rachel is talking to Ben.]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Carol and Susan are dropping off Ben.]
Ross: Yeah I know; hes in Bens class.
Jennifer: Oh little Ben.
Ross: Look, I gotta go pick up Ben. Everything so far sounds great Joey, just remember to keep it on the mellow side, okay? Just a couple of guys hanging out playing poker, no-no strippers or anything okay?
Ben: Da Da.
Ben: Da Da.
[Cut to Central Perk, Ross is taking Ben to visit Rachel whos working there.]
Ben: Da Da.
Rachel: Hey! We were not on aOkay. Thats fine! Fine. Yknow what Ben? One day when you are a lot older I am going to tell you that entire story over a pitcher of real margaritas, okay?
Ross: Its Ben and his Da-Da. Da-Da? Can you say Da-Da? Yknow, you might as well say it because I told your
Phoebe: Uh-huh, Im with Ben.
Ross: Hey I uh just picked up Ben from school
Phoebe: Oh, there you are Ben!
Ben: Aunt Phoebe, what are you doing here?
Phoebe: I am one of Bens mothers. Im a lesbian. It was, it was difficult coming out to my parents.
Trudie Styler: So, I guess you and I should talk about Jack and Ben right now.
Phoebe: Oh good! Then youre in luck! Bens not my son!
Ross: Well actually, Im picking Ben up tomorrow, maybe hell be there.
Ross: Well it turns out that Ben and Stings son do not get along.
Phoebe: Hey Ross! Doesnt Ben go to the Smithfield Day School?
Ben: I have to go. My friend Doug is waiting for me over there. (Goes over to Doug.)
Ben: Jack? I hate him! Hes a jerk.
Ross: Playpen?! Bens seven!
Ben: Sharing is good.
Monica: Ah, well if you dont clear this off, you wont be getting one of those from me. But Bens coming over here tomorrow to play this game, this cant be there.
Monica: But Ben is coming over tonight and he cant see this.
Ross: Well uh, I-Im a paleontologist. Umm, I-I live in New York. I have a son Ben. Uh, hi Ben! (Waves.) And uh
The Teacher: Right. Are you looking for Jacks parents to discuss the problems hes having with Ben? (Phoebe nods Yes.) Yeah. Because I really do think the parents should sit down and have a conversation.
Phoebe: Oh hi BenNo!! Dont look at the machine! (Covers the screen.)
Ross: Well, I asked him if he wanted to eat, he said, "No." I asked him if he wanted to sleep, he said, "No." I asked him what he wanted to do, he said, "No." So, hes sweeping. (We see Ben playing with a broom and a dustpan.)
Ross: Yeah well, he's not gonna get this one. Ben is way cuter than that kid. I mean look at him, look at you, (Starts to whine like a baby and Joey just glares at him.)
Ross: Ben Franklin.
Ben: Auntie Monica!! (He runs to hug her.)
Rachel: When Carol was pregnant with Ben
Ross: You? You! Want to watch Ben? (in the background Monica mouths Dont worry, Ill be here the whole time. to Ross.) Yes! Thatd be great, no, I just wanted to ask Monica, because I know how empty her life is. (Monica sarcastically mouths Yeah! and holds up her thumb.)
Ross: What about Ben?
Monica: Come on Ben.
Ben: Cool!
(Monica and Ben sit down on the couch.)
Monica: Okay Ben, why don't you come open some more presents, and Santa, the Armadillo and I have a little talk in the kitchen? There's a sentence I'd never thought I'd say.
Ross: Ooh, hey Ben, what if the Holiday Armadillo told you all about the Festival of Lights?
Ben: Santa! (Runs to Chandler and hugs him)
Ross: I'm the Holiday Armadillo, your part-Jewish friend. You sent me here to give Ben some presents. Remember?
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Rachel is filing her nails as Ross and Ben enter.]
(Ross turns around and walks back to Ben.)
Ross: No, no, really, Ive got to take the car back anyway, Im spending all day tomorrow with Ben, Its fine, no guilt I promise.
Written by: Andrew Reich & Ted Cohen Directed by: Ben Weiss Transcribed by: Eleonora, Pheeboh, Sebastiano & Vanessa
Chandler: Hey! (Grunts as Ben hits him at full speed.)
Ross: I went thru this with Ben and Carol. One cup of coffee won't affect your milk.
Ross: That's Ben, my son from my first marriage.
Directed by: Ben Weiss Written by: Mark Kunerth Transcript by: David Buehrle
Written by: Sherry Bilsing-Graham & Ellen Plummer Directed by: Ben Weiss Transcribed by: Kreidy
[Scene: Joeys Premiere, Rachel is already there with her date, Tommy who's played by Ben Stiller who will be in There's Something About Mary and Meet The Parents, as Ross and his date, Cailin, arrive.]
Ross: Phoebe, you were sure Ben was gonna be a girl.
Ross: Hey listen can you do me a big favor? The deans office just called and said there was an urgent meeting. Can you watch Ben for like an hour?
RACHEL: I'm off my break now so uh, um here you take this [hands back Ben] and um, I am gonna go pour these very nice people some coffee. Ok. Oh look at that, I don't have a pot. I don't have a pot. Well, hey, maybe I've got one at home, or in Scarsdale. Hey is that a door? [leaves]